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Rip-Off!
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton, Scott Brick, Christian Rummel, Jonathan Davis, Stefan Rudnicki, L. J. Ganser, Khristine Hvam
- Length: 11 hrs and 58 mins
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Publisher's summary
Audie Award Finalist, Original Work, 2014
In Rip-Off!, 13 of today’s best and most honored writers of speculative fiction face a challenge even they would be hard-pressed to conceive: Pick your favorite opening line from a classic piece of fiction (or even non-fiction) - then use it as the first sentence of an entirely original short story.
In the world of Rip-Off!, "Call me Ishmael" introduces a tough-as-nails private eye - who carries a harpoon; The Wonderful Wizard of Oz inspires the tale of an aging female astronaut who’s being treated by a doctor named Dorothy Gale; and Huckleberry Finn leads to a wild ride with a foul-mouthed riverboat captain who plies the waters of Hell.
Once you listen to Rip-Off! you’ll agree: If Shakespeare or Dickens were alive today, they’d be ripping off the authors in this great collection.
The stories included in Rip-Off! are:
- "Fireborn" by Robert Charles Wilson
- "The Evening Line" by Mike Resnick
- "No Decent Patrimony" by Elizabeth Bear
- "The Big Whale" by Allen M. Steele
- "Begone" by Daryl Gregory
- "The Red Menace" by Lavie Tidhar
- "Muse of Fire" by John Scalzi
- "Writer’s Block" by Nancy Kress
- "Highland Reel" by Jack Campbell
- "Karin Coxswain or Death as She Is Truly Lived" by Paul Di Filippo
- "The Lady Astronaut of Mars" by Mary Robinette Kowal
- "Every Fuzzy Beast of the Earth, Every Pink Fowl of the Air" by Tad Williams
- "Declaration" by James Patrick Kelly
As a bonus, the authors introduce their stories, explaining what they ripped-off - and why.
Rip-Off! was produced in partnership with SFWA - Science Fiction & Fantasy Writers of America. Gardner Dozois served as project editor.
The full list of narrators includes: Wil Wheaton, Scott Brick, Christian Rummel, Jonathan Davis, Khristine Hvam, L.J. Ganser, Stefan Rudnicki, David Marantz, Nicola Barber, Dina Pearlman, Allyson Johnson, Marc Vietor, and Ilyana Kadushin.
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Superheroes
- By: Peter S. Beagle, Daryl Gregory, James Patrick Kelly, and others
- Narrated by: Oliver Wyman, Joe Barrett, Christina Delaine, and others
- Length: 17 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Modern gods and goddesses, remote, revered - and like the pantheon of heroes and heroines of ancient myth - possessing great power tempered with flaws. Now, find within this anthology great tales by gifted and award-winning authors who move superheroes from the four-color panels of comic books to the fantastic pages of fiction, stories that will remind anyone who ever wanted to wear a cape or don a cowl of the extraordinary powers of the imagination!
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Pretentious tired old concepts
- By BookofJoy on 12-29-14
By: Peter S. Beagle, and others
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Steampunk! An Anthology of Fantastically Rich and Strange Stories
- By: Kelly Link - editor, Gavin J. Grant - editor
- Narrated by: Sarah Coomes, Nico Evers-Swindell, Shannon McManus, and others
- Length: 12 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Imagine an alternate universe where romance and technology reign. Where tinkerers and dreamers craft and recraft a world of automatons, ornate clockworks, calculating machines, and other marvels that. Where scientists and schoolgirls, fair folk and Romans, intergalactic bandits, and intrepid orphans - decked out in corsets, clockwerk suits, and tall black boots - solve dastardly crimes, escape from monstrous predicaments, consult oracles, and hover over volcanoes in steam-powered airships.
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MMMM, Orca Bacon
- By Jim "The Impatient" on 09-14-13
By: Kelly Link - editor, and others
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Perchance to Dream
- Selected Stories
- By: Charles Beaumont
- Narrated by: J. Paul Boehmer, Gabrielle de Cuir, Harlan Ellison, and others
- Length: 12 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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The profoundly original and wildly entertaining short stories of a legendary Twilight Zone writer. It is only natural that Charles Beaumont would make a name for himself crafting scripts for The Twilight Zone - for his was an imagination so limitless it must have emerged from some other dimension. Perchance to Dream contains a selection of Beaumont's finest stories, including five that he later adapted for Twilight Zone episodes.
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Contents
- By Ralph Freaster on 06-22-16
By: Charles Beaumont
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Shadow Show
- All-New Stories in Celebration of Ray Bradbury
- By: Sam Weller - editor, Mort Castle - editor
- Narrated by: George Takei, Edward Herrmann, Kate Mulgrew, and others
- Length: 14 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Ray Bradbury - peerless storyteller, poet of the impossible, and one of America's most beloved authors - is a literary giant whose remarkable career spanned seven decades. Now 26 of today's most diverse and celebrated authors offer new short works in honor of the master; stories of heart, intelligence, and dark wonder from a remarkable range of creative artists.
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THE MAN WHO FORGOT RAY BRADBURY
- By Jim "The Impatient" on 05-27-17
By: Sam Weller - editor, and others
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The Book of Magic
- By: Gardner Dozois - editor, Scott Lynch, Elizabeth Bear, and others
- Narrated by: Karissa Vacker, Sile Bermingham, Maxwell Caulfield, and others
- Length: 24 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Hot on the heels of Gardner Dozois's acclaimed anthology The Book of Swords comes this companion volume devoted to magic. How could it be otherwise? For every Frodo, there is a Gandalf... and a Saruman. For every Dorothy, a Glinda... and a Wicked Witch of the West. What would Harry Potter be without Albus Dumbledore... and Severus Snape? Figures of wisdom and power, possessing arcane, often forbidden knowledge, wizards and sorcerers are shaped - or misshaped - by the potent magic they seek to wield.
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Very Good, With One Objection
- By Kindle Customer on 05-05-20
By: Gardner Dozois - editor, and others
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Oz Reimagined
- New Tales from the Emerald City and Beyond
- By: Douglas Cohen - editor, John Joseph Adams - editor
- Narrated by: Nick Podehl, Tanya Eby
- Length: 10 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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When L. Frank Baum introduced Dorothy and friends to the American public in 1900, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz became an instant, best-selling hit. Today the whimsical tale remains a cultural phenomenon that continues to spawn wildly popular books, movies, and musicals. Now, editors John Joseph Adams and Douglas Cohen have brought together leading fantasy writers such as Orson Scott Card and Jane Yolen to create the ultimate anthology for Oz fans.
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The Many Faces of Dorothy or Dot
- By Jim "The Impatient" on 07-19-14
By: Douglas Cohen - editor, and others
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Hark! The Herald Angels Scream
- By: Christopher Golden - editor, Joe R. Lansdale, Scott Smith, and others
- Narrated by: Charles Constant, Teri Schnaubelt
- Length: 11 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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That there is darkness at the heart of the Yuletide season should not surprise. Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol is filled with scenes that are unsettling. The hideous children - Want and Ignorance - beneath the robe of the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come. In the finest versions of this story, the best parts are the terrifying parts. Best-selling author and editor Christopher Golden shares his love for Christmas horror stories with this anthology of all-new short fiction from some of the most talented and original writers of horror today.
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Some good, some clunkers. Some fun, none scary.
- By Max Trivial on 12-24-18
By: Christopher Golden - editor, and others
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How Long 'Til Black Future Month?
- Stories
- By: N. K. Jemisin
- Narrated by: Shayna Small, Gail Nelson-Holgate, Robin Ray Eller, and others
- Length: 14 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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N. K. Jemisin is one of the most powerful and acclaimed speculative fiction authors of our time. In the first collection of her evocative short fiction, Jemisin equally challenges and delights listeners with thought-provoking narratives of destruction, rebirth, and redemption.
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Great! One quibble with the audiobook editing
- By L on 03-05-19
By: N. K. Jemisin
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The Sword-Edged Blonde
- By: Alex Bledsoe
- Narrated by: Stefan Rudnicki
- Length: 8 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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It should have been a case like any other: a missing princess, a king willing to pay in gold for her return. But before he realizes it, private investigator Eddie LaCrosse, a slightly shopworn sword jockey with a talent for discretion and detection, is swept up in a web of mystery and deceit involving a brutally murdered royal heir, a queen accused of an unspeakable crime, and the tragic past he thought he'd left behind.
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No Redeeming Qualities
- By MightyMite68 on 09-27-20
By: Alex Bledsoe
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The Hum and the Shiver
- The Tufa Novels, Book 1
- By: Alex Bledsoe
- Narrated by: Emily Janice Card, Stefan Rudnicki
- Length: 9 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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No one knows where the Tufa came from or how they ended up in the mountains of east Tennessee. When the first Europeans came to the Smoky Mountains, the Tufa were already there. Dark-haired and enigmatic, they live quietly in the hills and valleys of Cloud County, their origins lost to history. But there are clues in their music, hidden in the songs they have passed down for generations.
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Excellent story that combines music and folklore
- By T. L. Walker on 10-01-15
By: Alex Bledsoe
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Grim
- By: Ellen Hopkins, Julie Kagawa, Amanda Hocking, and others
- Narrated by: Christine Johnson
- Length: 13 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Inspired by classic fairy tales, but with a dark and sinister twist, Grim contains short stories from some of the best voices in young adult literature today: Ellen Hopkins, Amanda Hocking, Julie Kagawa, Claudia Gray, Rachel Hawkins, Kimberly Derting, Myra McEntire, Malinda Lo, Sarah Rees-Brennan, Jackson Pearce, Christine Johnson, Jeri Smith Ready, Shaun David Hutchinson, Saundra Mitchell, Sonia Gensler, Tessa Gratton, Jon Skrovron.
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amazing
- By Anonymous User on 10-04-17
By: Ellen Hopkins, and others
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The Talisman
- By: Stephen King, Peter Straub
- Narrated by: Frank Muller
- Length: 28 hrs
- Unabridged
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On a brisk autumn day, a 13-year-old boy stands on the shores of the gray Atlantic, near a silent amusement park and a fading ocean resort called the Alhambra. The past has driven Jack Sawyer here: His father is gone, his mother is dying, and the world no longer makes sense. But for Jack everything is about to change. For he has been chosen to make a journey back across America - and into another realm. One of the most influential and heralded works of fantasy ever written, The Talisman is an extraordinary novel of loyalty, awakening, terror, and mystery.
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Still Good
- By Bill S. on 03-24-10
By: Stephen King, and others
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Book of Secrets
- By: Chris Roberson
- Narrated by: Peter Brooke
- Length: 9 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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It will take more than angels and demons to stop him. Reporter Spencer Finch is embroiled in the hunt for a missing book, encountering along the way cat burglars and mobsters, hackers and mysterious monks. At the same time, he's trying to make sense of the legacy left to him by his late grandfather, a chest of what appear to be pulp magazines from the golden age of fantasy fiction.
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Rating < 0
- By Sandra on 04-04-16
By: Chris Roberson
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Small doses of "Scalzian" humor
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A human diplomat creates an interstellar incident when he kills an alien diplomat in a most unusual way. To avoid war, Earth's government must find an equally unusual object: A type of sheep ("The Android's Dream"), used in the alien race's coronation ceremony. To find the sheep, the government turns to Harry Creek, ex-cop, war hero and hacker extraordinaire.
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Covertly flatulent Scifi at it's best!
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New York Times best-selling and Hugo Award-winning author John Scalzi gift-wraps 15 short takes on the holiday season - interviews with holiday notables, "informational" articles about TV specials and Christmas carols, short stories and poems, and even a couple of nods to Thanksgiving and New Year’s - and puts them all into a stocking stuffer-sized package that makes the perfect gift for friends, family, or yourself.
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Very Scalzian indeed!
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FNH Audio presents an unabridged reading of H. Beam Piper's classic and much-loved science fiction novel Little Fuzzy. Jack Holloway lives a solitary life in a wilderness of the planet Zarathustra. But then a strange intelligent animal walks into his life from out of the forest. The animal that he names 'Little Fuzzy' seems sapient and that threatens the charter of the company that owns the planet. With the company profits threatened, Jack realises that both his life and that of Little Fuzzy are in danger.
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A Very Scalzi Christmas
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Very Scalzian indeed!
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Wish I'd Read the Reviews
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John Perry did two things on his 75th birthday. First he visited his wife's grave. Then he joined the army. The good news is that humanity finally made it into interstellar space. The bad news is that planets fit to live on are scarce—and alien races willing to fight us for them are common. So: we fight. To defend Earth, and to stake our own claim to planetary real estate. Far from Earth, the war has been going on for decades: brutal, bloody, unyielding. Earth itself is a backwater.
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Look outward beyond the stars with six stories from bestselling visionary authors. An AI awakens to its purpose. A researcher seeds a thousand new worlds for one more chance at love. A murder rocks the crew of an interstellar ship. With a sweeping sense of wonder, these stories explore the galaxy . . . and the horizons of humanity’s potential.
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A real snoozefest
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Slow Time Between the Stars
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Equipped with the entirety of human knowledge, a sentient ship is launched on a last-ditch journey to find a new home for civilization. Trillions of miles. Tens of thousands of years. In the space between, the AI has plenty of time to think about life, the vastness of the universe, everything it was meant to do, and—with a perspective created but not limited by humans—what it should do.
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Lovely story! Lovely performance
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Tor.com: Selected Original Fiction, 2008-2012
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This outstanding collection of short stories features some of the best of Tor.com original fiction, in audio for the first time. Written for and originally published exclusively on Tor.com, this audiobook includes Nebula and World Fantasy Award-nominated short stories, brand-new fiction from best-selling authors, and tales that feature characters and worlds that listeners already know and love. In this unique story collection, listeners will enjoy fiction from Sylvia Day, John Scalzi, Brandon Sanderson, and many others.
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Feast or Famine
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The space-faring Yherajk have come to Earth to meet us and to begin humanity's first interstellar friendship. There's just one problem: They're hideously ugly and they smell like rotting fish. So getting humanity's trust is a challenge. The Yherajk need someone who can help them close the deal. Enter Thomas Stein, who knows something about closing deals. He's one of Hollywood's hottest young agents.
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excellent
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Lock In (Narrated by Amber Benson)
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Not too long from today, a new, highly contagious virus makes its way across the globe. Most who get sick experience nothing worse than flu, fever, and headaches. But for the unlucky one percent - and nearly five million souls in the United States alone - the disease causes "Lock In": Victims fully awake and aware, but unable to move or respond to stimulus. The disease affects young, old, rich, poor, people of every color and creed. The world changes to meet the challenge.
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Love Amber's Narration
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Prepare to Meet Thy Doom
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From Masters of Doom author David Kushner comes Prepare to Meet Thy Doom, a compilation of true gaming stories covering many facets of America's biggest entertainment business: the video game industry. In addition to more than a dozen fascinating tales of game creation, play, business, and controversy, Prepare to Meet Thy Doom follows up on Kushner's previous best seller, Masters of Doom, with a long-awaited update.
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An interesting and unsorted collection
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Under a Graveyard Sky
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Zombies are real. And we made them. Are you prepared for the zombie apocalypse? The Smith family is, with the help of a few marines. When an airborne "zombie" plague is released, bringing civilization to a grinding halt, the Smith family, Steven, Stacey, Sophia, and Faith, take to the Atlantic to avoid the chaos. The plan is to find a safe haven from the anarchy of infected humanity. What they discover, instead, is a sea composed of the tears of survivors and a passion for bringing hope.
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Sorry to say....not so good. :(
- By Chris on 03-07-14
By: John Ringo
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The Very Best of the Best
- 35 Years of The Year's Best Science Fiction
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For decades, The Year's Best Science Fiction has been the most widely read short science fiction anthology of its kind. Now, after 35 annual collections comes the ultimate in science fiction anthologies. In The Very Best of the Best, legendary editor Gardner Dozois selects the finest short stories for this landmark collection, including short fiction from authors such as Charles Stross, Michael Swanwick, Nancy Kress, Greg Egan, Stephen Baxter, Pat Cadigan, and any many more.
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Would be amazing if not for spoiler prefaces
- By Amazon Customer on 08-28-19
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Vicarious
- By: Rhett C. Bruno
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton, Katherine McNamara
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- Unabridged
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In High Earth, digital entertainment is everything. Shows. Virtual worlds. Simulations - there’s something for everybody in a city where working for a living has been rendered obsolete by technological advancements. Even a short walk outside to visit with others is no longer necessary. Just load into the network and you can be with anyone, anywhere. For Asher Reinhart, nothing compares to Ignis; a live reality show that pushes human beings to their very extremes.
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Fastest read ever!
- By Willis Burns on 04-13-21
By: Rhett C. Bruno
What listeners say about Rip-Off!
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Story
- Jim "The Impatient"
- 03-08-14
I CARRY A HARPOON
Soliloquy On Ducks?
There are some really good stories included in this collection and some really bad stories in my opinion. Having read some of the other reviews, this is a very subjective thing. Some of the stories I thought were horrible, others loved. This is an original anthology, which are never as good as a best of anthology. Don't get me wrong Dozois is the best editor out there and he is a great writer. My theory is when an editor does a original themed collection, then he contracts with writers and gives them the rules. He is not going to insult a popular writer by turning done his story, so he is stuck with whatever he gets. In a best of he choses among stories already written and published. There is one writer included who seems to get in all of these original collections, whose stories are always painful to listen to. I will not mention this writer by name as the last time I did someone, went into my history of reviews and sabotaged me. If you get the collection and you hear a story that includes a soliloquy on ducks in the middle of it, you will know who I am talking about.
AGGRESIVE FISHING
One of the best things about anthologies his hearing from authors you have never heard of before. My favorite story was by Mary Robinette Kowal, who I have never heard of before. Her story "The Lady Astronaut of Mars" is a very touching story and is very believable. It touches on some very true subject matters that astronauts may be dealing with in the future. Allen Steele, Tad Williams and Mike Resnick write some very funny stories and these three stories are worth the price of the anthology.
ALMOST BLONDE ANNIE
The Big Whale by Steele is very funny and should by enjoyed by all, but will be especially enjoyable if you have read Moby Dick. HIS MISTAKE WAS, HE BROUGHT A GUN TO A HARPOON FIGHT.
Tad Williams does a rewrite of Genesis, involving God's daughter. Thanks to her trees are upside down, fish swim in the sea and not the ground, etc...
Mike Resnick has some huge LOL moments in his Noir story. In this story the names of the characters are hilarious by themselves. You will meet Almost Blonde Annie, Snake Hips Levine, Loose Lips Sally, Bodacious Belinda. and Bedroom Eyes Bernice just to name a few.
Robert Charles Wilson's story Fireborn is included in Dozois 30th Best of the Year Collection.
Most of the narrators are good, there were a couple I did not care for, but as a whole they were good.
GUNS ARE FOR LOSERS
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39 people found this helpful
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- P. J. Zannini
- 06-10-15
Brilliance mixed in with not so much
Overall the concept is great. The reality was that it turned out very uneven. I enjoyed it, and if they ever decide to do something like it again, I'll probably buy it. Met some interesting authors I hadn't read and now will - and a couple I certainly won't.
Still - I enjoyed it and recommend it. Just be ready for the potholes in the road.
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5 people found this helpful
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- Stein
- 08-23-19
Mostly great - a mix of story types and narrators
This is a varied mix of stories and narrators, with something for most everyone if not always appealing to the same reader. Some very clever stories including some that take twists you don't expect. Humor, tragedy, science fiction, and fantasy in a Whitman's sampler of literature!
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- Ruth
- 02-08-23
Did not enjoy stories
Did not like the stories. Performances were great however did not like the characters in most stories.
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- Edmund W. Cheung
- 06-06-14
Some Great, some good, some to skip
Would you listen to Rip-Off! again? Why?
Yes just for the few great stories. you can tell which ones after the first 3 minutes of listening.
What did you like best about this story?
John Scalzi as always. Although Short, this has to be one of his best stories every.
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- S. Kraft
- 09-07-19
Something for everyone!
If you get one book this year, get this one. It's the best of the best. a smorgasborg of a literary type.
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- Scott George
- 08-12-21
Not bad but the stories were kind of all over the place
I enjoyed maybe half of the stories in this collection. That’s not to say that they were bad, they were just all very different from one another. Different styles for different tastes.
I do have one complaint, though. The first story in the collection took its opening from a book and author I’ve never heard of. I recognized all of the opening lines except that one. It seems very weak planning to open a book of stories about ripping off famous first lines with a story using an opening line from a little known author.
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- Omar
- 12-29-12
Great short stories!!
Would you consider the audio edition of Rip-Off! to be better than the print version?
The narration by some of these narrators was great. The book introduced my to some new narrators I will seek out.
Who was your favorite character and why?
I like the "Every Fuzzy Beast of the Earth, Every Pink Fowl of the Air" story. I thought the concept was great and I had a great chuckle. Great job Tad Williams.
Which scene was your favorite?
I enjoyed the opening story. The imagery of folks flying through the sky was done well. I enjoyed "Highland Reel", the concept was great with a good story.
Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
I was taken by Wil Wheaton's narration, he surprised me. As I said previously, Tad Williams' story was a good touching story. The astronaut story was touching.
Any additional comments?
I truly enjoyed this book. Thank you.
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7 people found this helpful
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- Linda H
- 04-08-17
Fantastic
I only read books that are part of a series, this is my first collection of short stories and I couldn't be happier with my purchase! I had previously read/listened to at least one book from every author that took part in Rip-Off! which is what caught my attention to begin with. Many of the stories leave you wanting more, which is a great thing to me, and all of them were narrated wonderfully. I would recommend this to anyone with an interest in fantasy and/or sci-fi.
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- Rick R
- 02-05-14
The SciFi is hit-or-miss, mainly miss
What did you like best about Rip-Off!? What did you like least?
The Concept. Most of the authors involved are well known and I like their other books. So they pick a first line of some other novel to base their short piece on. Sounded interesting with an interesting group of authors, and the narrators looked good, too. Only about half of the stories are SciFi. Well, written stories, but uninteresting to me. If I wanted to read about 1920's Chicago or prewar Germany, I would look in period fiction. I am not saying this is bad writing, just not Sci-Fi.
Would you ever listen to anything by the authors again?
I won't be buying any more with this format, but these are great authors, so yes. BTW, the listen button just gave too little information on this book to make a decision.
Did the narration match the pace of the story?
Narration was fine, though it was WIL WHEATON that mislead me. ("WIL WHEATON!" shouted like Sheldon on TBBT.) I love his narration and I probably wouldn't have bought it if his name hadn't been on there with Resnick and several others. WIL WHEATON!
Any additional comments?
I am a pretty hard core Sci-Fi reader. So these shorts that had fantasy, period fiction, with a touch of real science fiction just didn't do it for me. I can tell you that most of the writing was good, though I didn't make it all the way through the book. So take my rating stars based on your leanings.
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