When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us
Letting Go of Their Problems, Loving Them Anyway, and Getting on with Our Lives
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Narrated by:
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Jane Adams
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By:
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Jane Adams
About this listen
How do today's parents cope when the dreams we had for our children clash with reality? What can we do for our 20- and even 30-somethings who can't seem to grow up? Who can we turn to when the kids aren't all right and we, their parents, are frightened, frustrated, resentful, embarrassed, and especially, disappointed? In this groundbreaking book, a social psychologist who's been chronicling the lives of American families for over two decades confronts our deepest concerns when our grown kids have failed to thrive. She listens to a generation that "did everything right" and expected its children to grow into happy, healthy, successful adults. But they haven't, at least not yet - and meanwhile, we're letting their problems threaten our health, marriages, security, freedom, careers, retirement, and other family relationships.
With warmth, empathy, and perspective, Dr. Adams offers a positive, life-affirming message to parents who are still trying to "fix" their adult children - Stop! She shows us how to separate from their problems without separating from them, and how to be a positive force in their lives while getting on with our own.
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The Fatherless Daughter Project
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- By: Denna D. Babul RN, Karin Luise PhD
- Narrated by: Tara Ochs, PhD Karin Luise, RN Denna D. Babul
- Length: 9 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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When Motherless Daughters was published 20 years ago, it unleashed a tsunami of healing awareness. When Denna Babul and Karin Luise couldn't find the equivalent book for fatherlessness, The Fatherless Daughter Project was born. The book will set fatherless women on the path to growth and fulfillment by helping them to understand how their losses have impacted their lives.
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very healing and tremendously helpful
- By R. Mccloud on 01-14-18
By: Denna D. Babul RN, and others
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10 Conversations You Need to Have with Yourself
- A Powerful Plan for Spiritual Growth and Self-Improvement
- By: Shmuley Boteach
- Narrated by: Shmuley Boteach
- Length: 6 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Some of the most effective talk therapy is self-talk therapy - learning to connect positively with that internal voice that serves as your own personal GPS to guide you through life. Rabbi Shmuley teaches the reader to reconnect with the inner voice of conscience, the source of personal dreams and values, which has been so drowned out by the noise of a culture that emphasizes form over substance, career over calling, and consumption over conviction. Drawing on Rabbi Shmuley's extensive counseling experience, this book helps you defeat negative self-talk.
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Grateful for inspiration, guidance and humility
- By Mike on 07-27-15
By: Shmuley Boteach
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Women Who Think Too Much
- How to Break Free of Overthinking and Reclaim Your Life
- By: Susan Nolen-Hoeksema
- Narrated by: Sheryl Bernstein
- Length: 2 hrs and 58 mins
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It's not a surprise that our fast-paced, overly analytical culture is pushing people - especially women - to spend countless hours thinking about negative ideas, feelings, and experiences. Renowned psychologist Dr. Susan Nolen-Hoeksema calls this "overthinking". Her groundbreaking research shows that an increasing number of women - more than half of those in her extensive study - are doing it too much and too often, hindering their ability to lead a satisfying life.
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Generic tools for overcoming overthinking
- By letlet on 01-09-19
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The Breakup Bible
- The Smart Woman's Guide to Healing from a Breakup or Divorce
- By: Rachel Sussman
- Narrated by: Susan Boyce
- Length: 12 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Psychotherapist and breakup expert Rachel A. Sussman, LCSW, reveals the secrets every woman needs to get her life back on track. Drawing on hundreds of counseling sessions she's conducted with women at all stages of recovery, Sussman developed a proven three-phase process for healing from a breakup.
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lifesaver!
- By Dawson on 11-30-17
By: Rachel Sussman
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When Your Kid Is Hurting
- Helping Your Child Through the Tough Days
- By: Kevin Leman
- Narrated by: Jon Gauger
- Length: 7 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Children today live in an unpredictable, disruptive, and often violent world. Many of them live in two different homes with different sets of expectations. They face bullying at school and online. They hear news of school shootings, and racially or religiously motivated violence. They may have lost a friend or a loved one. As parents, the impulse to protect our children is strong, but that very protection can end up handicapping them for life. Rather than seek to save them from the hard things, parents must teach their kids how to cope with and rise above their problems.
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So helpful for so many situations
- By Natalie on 10-03-18
By: Kevin Leman
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Codependent No More
- How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
- By: Melody Beattie
- Narrated by: Melody Beattie
- Length: 8 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Is someone else's problem your problem? If, like so many others, you've lost sight of your own life in the drama of tending to a loved one’s self-destructive behavior, you may be codependent—and you may find yourself in this book. With personal reflections, exercises, and instructive stories drawn from Beattie’s own life and the lives of those she’s counseled, Codependent No More helps you break old patterns and maintain healthy boundaries, and offers a clear and achievable path to healing, hope, freedom, and happiness.
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great book with unbearable reader
- By Nielah on 09-01-22
By: Melody Beattie
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Relationship Breakthrough
- How to Create Outstanding Relationships in Every Area of Your Life
- By: Cloe Madanes, Anthony Robbins
- Narrated by: Aimee Jolson
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Everyone faces the challenges of making relationships work. Whether with spouses, family members, friends, lovers, or colleagues, relationships have the power to make one feel happy, frustrated, or miserable. In Relationship Breakthrough, Cloe Madanes - an expert in creating healing, empowering relationships - gives listeners vital tools to transform their relationships and their lives. Madanes's cutting-edge methods produce real results and create rewarding, sustainable relationships.
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Disappointed
- By Dee on 01-10-16
By: Cloe Madanes, and others
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The 10 Habits of Happy Mothers
- Reclaiming Our Passion, Purpose, and Sanity
- By: Meg Meeker M.D.
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 10 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Friendship. Simplicity. Love. Value. Faith. Solitude. Money. Fear. Hope. Purpose. Dr. Meg Meeker has seen mothers struggle with these 10 issues for the past 25 years, and she has also learned how to help them live less stressful, happier, more fulfilling lives. The Ten Habits of Happy Mothers will show women how to reduce loneliness, anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem by inspiring women to embrace more positive emotions and habits.
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Recommend the book but had hard time listening to
- By Kaletra Dispennett on 12-25-16
By: Meg Meeker M.D.
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Strong Mothers, Strong Sons
- Lessons Mothers Need to Raise Extraordinary Men
- By: Meg Meeker
- Narrated by: Marguerite Gavin
- Length: 12 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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From the moment a mother holds her newborn son, his eyes tell her that she is his world. But often, as he grows up, the boy who needs her simultaneously pushes her away. Calling upon thirty years of experience as a pediatrician, Meg Meeker, MD, a highly sought-after national speaker, assistant professor of clinical medicine, and mother of four, shares the secrets that every mother needs to know in order to strengthen-or rebuild-her relationship with her son.
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Update of wording in your book is required
- By danamc on 08-27-18
By: Meg Meeker
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Loving Your Spouse When You Feel Like Walking Away
- By: Gary Chapman
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 6 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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When you said, “I do”, you entered marriage with high hopes, dreaming it would be supremely happy. You never intended for it to be miserable. Millions of couples are struggling in desperate marriages. But the story doesn’t have to end there. Dr. Gary Chapman writes, “I believe that in every troubled marriage, one or both partners can take positive steps that have the potential for changing the emotional climate in their marriage.”
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encouragement through another chance
- By Brookley on 09-19-18
By: Gary Chapman
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Before It's Too Late
- Why Some Kids Get into Trouble - and What Parents Can Do about It
- By: Stanton E. Samenow PhD
- Narrated by: Stephen R. Thorne
- Length: 6 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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If you sense that your child is seriously troubled, you may feel bewildered, helpless, ineffective. How can you stop your child from throwing away his or her life? How can you avoid thinking that you've failed as a parent? In this newly revised and expanded edition of the classic guide Before It's Too Late, clinical psychologist Stanton E. Samenow explains how to break the useless cycle of blame and take corrective action.
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special education teacher
- By Amazon Customer on 03-02-18
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Rethinking Narcissism
- The Bad - and Surprising Good - About Feeling Special
- By: Dr. Craig Malkin
- Narrated by: Kiff VandenHeuvel
- Length: 6 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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In Rethinking Narcissism listeners will learn that there's far more to narcissism than its reductive invective would imply. The truth is that narcissists (all of us) fall on a spectrum somewhere between utter selflessness on the one side and arrogance and grandiosity on the other. A healthy middle exhibits a strong sense of self.
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Great info, but proceed with caution
- By Caterina M. Platt on 11-16-17
By: Dr. Craig Malkin
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Not worth tour time...
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Great author and Great Book
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Done with the Crying
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Take your life back and let healing begin
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Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child
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Will save you from major mistakes
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Disappointed
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Not worth tour time...
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Great author and Great Book
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Done with the Crying
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In Done with the Crying: Help and Healing for Mothers of Estranged Adult Children, Sheri McGregor, MA, helps parents break free from emotional pain - and move forward in their own lives. As a loving mother to whom the unthinkable happened, McGregor knows the horrible shock that wrings a parent dry, triggers denial, blame, anger, and shame. With empathy and understanding, as well as tools, the latest research, and insight from more than 9,000 parents of estranged adult children, McGregor helps parents of estranged adults plan, prepare for emotional triggers, and prevail over pain.
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Take your life back and let healing begin
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Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child
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Doing Life with Your Adult Children
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If you've raised a child, you know that parenting doesn't stop when they turn eighteen. In many ways, your relationship gets even more complicated--your heart and your head are as involved as ever, but you can feel things shifting, whether your child lives under your roof or rarely stays in contact. Doing Life with Your Adult Children helps you navigate this rich and challenging season of parenting. Speaking from his own personal and professional experience, Burns offers practical answers to the most common questions he's received over the years.
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Some good points but...
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How to Connect with Your Troubled Adult Children
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When your child has reached (or long since passed) the point of independence, it's difficult to know what your "help" as a parent should look like. Following her best-selling book Setting Boundaries®with Your Adult Children, Allison Bottke offers an in-depth guide to help you connect with your adult child and to build your confidence, knowledge, and hope, as your child walks through challenging situations. Learn how to develop effective strategies to truly help your adult child - without sacrificing your sanity.
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BEWARE: Bottom line…. Get a diagnosis and put you kid on a pill!
- By Margaret Bullock on 09-07-21
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How to Really Love Your Adult Child
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More than 10 years after Parenting Your Adult Child was published, much has changed—including young adults themselves, as well as their parents. Economic upheavals, challenges to traditional values and beliefs, the phenomenon of over-involved "helicopter parenting"—all make relating to grown children more difficult than ever. Yet at the same time, being a parent of an adult child can bring great rewards.
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Helped to bring clarity and direction
- By J.T. on 01-03-24
By: Ross Campbell, and others
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Failure to Launch
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In Dr. Mark McConville's decades of experience as a family clinical psychologist, perhaps no problem has been more fraught than that of young adults who fail to successfully transition from adolescence into adulthood. These kids - technically adults - just can't get it together: They can't hold a job, they struggle to develop meaningful relationships, and they often end up back in their parents' spare bedroom or on the couch. In fact, studies show that one in four Americans aged 25 to 34 neither work nor attend school - a problem that spans all socioeconomic and geographic boundaries.
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Thank you.
- By TWW on 07-22-21
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Rules of Estrangement
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- Unabridged
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Labeled a silent epidemic by a growing number of therapists and researchers, estrangement is one of the most disorienting and painful experiences of a parent's life. Popular opinion typically tells a one-sided story of parents who got what they deserved or overly entitled adult children who wrongly blame their parents. However, the reasons for estrangement are far more complex and varied.
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Excellent book for the parent's perspective
- By Anand on 06-11-21
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You and Your Adult Child
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Your child is now an adult, but your job as a parent is far from over. Instead, your role must evolve to meet their ongoing, changing needs. But what exactly are these new needs? And why are they so different now than they were when you were a young adult? This is the first comprehensive guide written for parents whose children are in two of the most crucial decades of life.
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A must-read book
- By Anonymous User on 04-23-23
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Beyond Done with the Crying
- More Answers and Advice for Parents of Estranged Adult Children
- By: Sheri McGregor MA
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For any parent of estranged adult children, reconciling may be a solo sport. Even when reconciliations do occur, their success requires wisdom and strength. That's why it's so important to empower yourself, make positive changes, and reclaim your life, even while waiting and continuing to reach out (if you choose to). Beyond Done with the Crying: More Answers and Advice for Parents of Estranged Adult Children is filled with information and solutions to the complex, real-life problems that plague parents of estranged adult children and their families.
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Insightful
- By AnaElisa Casasola on 10-25-24
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When Your Adult Child Breaks Your Heart
- Coping with Mental Illness, Substance Abuse, and the Problems that Tear Families Apart
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Behind nearly every adult who is accused of a crime, becomes addicted to drugs or alcohol, or who is severely mentally ill and acting out in public, there is usually at least one extremely stressed-out parent. This parent may initially react with the bad news of their adult child behaving badly with, "Oh no!" followed by, "How can I help to fix this?" A very common third reaction is the thought, "Where did I go wrong - was it something I said or did, or that I failed to do when my child was growing up that caused these issues? Is this really somehow all my fault?"
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Glad I stumbled upon this…
- By Pamela J Hoyes on 10-03-23
By: Joel Young MD, and others
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Mother and Son
- The Respect Effect
- By: Dr. Emerson Eggerichs
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Love is important, but it is respect that is the key to your son's heart. The idea of moms respecting their sons may sound alien to some, but it seems to ignite curiosity across the board. It is easy to relate to the need for all of us to feel a mother's love, but is that the same thing as respect? Even for young boys, the effect of respect is nothing short of astounding when applied properly.
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Like finding pure gold!!!!!
- By Mary on 10-27-17
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Don't Let Your Kids Kill You
- A Guide for Parents of Drug and Alcohol Addicted Children
- By: Charles Rubin
- Narrated by: Tom Zingarelli
- Length: 4 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Don't Let Your Kids Kill You is a landmark work that dares to focus on the plight of the confused, distressed parent and not the erring child. It sets aside any preconceived ideas that parents are to blame for what is essentially a full-blown global crisis. Drawing on interviews with parents who have survived the heartbreak of kids on drugs, combined with his own experience, Charles Rubin provides practical advice on how parents can help themselves and their families by first attending to their own needs.
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Must read if kids are in deep.
- By nkay on 04-04-18
By: Charles Rubin
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How to Raise Your Adult Children
- Because Big Kids Have Even Bigger Problems
- By: Gail Parent, Susan Ende
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 9 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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There are many books out there to teach you how to handle your children after they graduate from diapers, but none tells you how to proceed once they graduate from high school. As new patterns emerge in the lives of young adults, parents find that their grown children have bigger problems than they did just a few years ago. How to Raise Your Adult Children is a manual for anxious moms and dads.
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Condescending
- By Daphne Stevens on 11-12-12
By: Gail Parent, and others
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When Your Child Divorces You.....Estrangement
- From Absalom to the Prodigal Son
- By: Jean Lash
- Narrated by: Virtual Voice
- Length: 40 mins
- Unabridged
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A 43 page book written to encourage the estranged parent. The Bible speaks at length of two kinds of estrangement. Two different paths that got there, and two different paths to get out. Both David and the Prodigal Father faced estrangement from their adult child. Support, advice, and encouragement "in the waiting". Written by an estranged mother.
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Compassion, understanding, non judge mental, heart felt
- By Marie on 06-17-24
By: Jean Lash
What listeners say about When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- HERBia
- 09-10-24
The substance lies on the last 3 chapters
Too many experiences overwhelmed me. However the last 3 chapters were inspiring enough to catch my full attention.
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- Amazon Customer
- 06-10-22
Great book
Listened to it 3 times. Need more details on detachment though. How to do that.
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- Barbara
- 01-24-24
I thought I was the only one
Loved how personal this book was. From drug using children to adult children in jail/in trouble
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- AnaElisa Casasola
- 06-17-24
The concept of detachment which is helpful for parents with children who disappoint them.
The story of parents help realize we are not alone in this painful and devastating journey.
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- Amazon Customer
- 06-18-19
Spot On!
I have been struggling to move on from my adult son for almost a decade and this book reinforced the decisions I am making are positive and I can finally move forward without the guilt.
The advise in this book has been monumental for me to hear and know that my story isnt unique, its a text book story for the parents of addicts and we have tomlet go and move on.
great book.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Englund Family
- 12-03-19
Was hoping for more
The basic messages are 1. accept that your kids’ choices are not your fault, 2. Learn to detach, 3. Get on with your own life. I did journal a good quote from this book... “now is the only time I can make any difference”, so at least I got that. This audiobook was difficult to listen to, the author narrates herself, and she does not have a good narration voice. I’m glad the book was as short as it was, otherwise I would have had a hard time finishing it.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Niel
- 06-12-17
Great book for parents with older kids title misleading
As a parent of an older child , this book has given me a space to listen and be , interesting how we experience similar thoughts but we dont have a platform to put it out there
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- Pat Cart
- 01-31-23
helpful
I listened to it all the way through...will listen again...I took in some keynotes...I realized I stopped my daughter now 51 from growing up...always bailing her out...not anymore...I'm done hurting...my other two son's I've called it quits with them...no more abuse..what hurts is not seeing my granddaughters...
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- Pam Shamblin
- 11-23-20
this book helped me tremendously
perfect read for this time in my life. I am 61 my daughter is 26. she is addicted to heroin and her 4 month old was taken by child protective services. She has chosen drugs over her son at this point. (he is in foster care and is currently 11 months old). I hope she straightens out before it's too late, but I cannot make her go to rehab. I had to distance myself. She will go when she is ready.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Jacquie C. Dickerson
- 01-31-20
Too many sad stories
Good inspiration to know you're not alone and that you don't need to feel guilty for your adults. It just took too long to get to the end.
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