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The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe  By  cover art

The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe

By: Conor Lastowka
Narrated by: Eliza Skinner, Janet Varney, Al Yankovic, Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy, Bill Corbett, John DiMaggio, Paul F. Tompkins, Sasheer Zamata, Jackie Kashian, Dulce Sloan, full cast
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Set your hyperwarp for hilarity and blast off to adventure!

  • The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe
  • The Pole Vault Championship Trailer
  • The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe
  • Aliens Seeking Olympics
  • The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe
  • Raising the Bar

Publisher's summary

Audible Originals and the team from RiffTrax present an intergalactic tale of intrigue and Olympic heroism in this multicast, sci-fi comedy adventure!

Kara Everglades has just finished her first year of high school and is longing for an adventure. So far, her only option is an invitation from some upperclassmen to watch them race a bunch of bullfrogs in a ditch. To be honest, she was hoping for something a bit more exciting.

Her grandfather, Cornelius Everglades, is a family legend (and a loose cannon), who founded his own island micronation. Unfortunately, the rest of the world refuses to acknowledge it (possibly because he’s gone about the nation-building process using wildly illegal and unethical means).

When Cornelius shows up at Kara’s door needing her help and promising an adventure, Kara agrees to go along with his far-fetched plan, even though a) she thought Cornelius was dead, and b) his scheme depends heavily on Kara wearing a mascot costume.

If Kara had only known about the giant alien spaceship currently speeding toward her grandfather’s country with the intent to subjugate and humiliate mankind, she might have reconsidered.

Full cast of voice actors and performers: Bill Corbett, John DiMaggio, Jackie Kashian, Colin Mahan, Kevin Murphy, Mike Nelson, Eliza Skinner, Dulce Sloan, Reggie Steele, Paul F. Tompkins, Janet Varney, Scott Vermeire, “Weird Al” Yankovic, and Sasheer Zamata.

©2019 Audible Originals, LLC (P)2018 Audible Originals, LLC.

Editor's Pick

RiffTrax, Weird Al, and… bickering space aliens
"What more could you possibly want packed into your next sci-fi comedy listen? How about a full cast of fan-favorite comedic talent delivering non-stop laughs and downright silliness? Plus, if you’re a fan of RiffTrax and the original Mystery Science Theater 3000, you will no doubt delight in the same brand of irreverent humor and in hearing the voices of Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy, and Bill Corbett in your ears. If you aren’t—well, you should give them a try—but either way you’ll still find it difficult to press pause on the Olympic-sized shenanigans of Kara Everglades and her wildly eccentric grandpa. Not to mention the group of evil yet bumbling space aliens careening towards them. This one really does have it all."
Catherine H., Audible Editor

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What listeners say about The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe

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    5 out of 5 stars

All Star Cast Crushes Lastowka's Absurdist Tale

I didn't know there was a way to possibly improve upon Conor Lastowka's sophomore effort, The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe, but now there obviously is, and that is to recruit an All Star Cast to just crush it.

Lastowka, a senior writer at RiffTrax, started off writing novels with the unexpectedly compelling tale of time travel and life on the open sea in the 2013 classic, Gone Whalin'. And in keeping with his ability to come up with names that tell you everything you need to know about a book, he followed it up in 2018 with this cosmic romp. And in doing so, he's positioned himself into a head start to being the definitive literary absurdist voice of the 2020s. He has such a unique voice and style, that to leave anything he writes on the shelf should be considered a very serious crime.

But then there is this thing, something so amazing I can't even wrap my mind around it yet. The galaxy of A-list talent involved in this audiobook dwarfs anything that could be imagined in the Milky Way and Andromeda galaxies combined. MST3K/RiffTrax stars Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett is just the beginning. You have Janet Varney, star of The Adventure of Korra, John DiMaggio, the voice of Bender from Futurama, Paul F. Tompkins of Mr. Show fame, and to top it all off, the king of absurd himself, Weird Al Yankovic. They are all on top of their game like you would not believe, every single one of them bring their A-game for an amazing experience you will not soon forget.

If this cast telling this story is not enough to warrant the purchase and consumption of it, then I honestly do not know what would be. This has cult classic written all over it. Get it now so you can say that you "liked it before it was cool."

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13 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Wacky Sci Fi reminiscent of Terry Pratchett

Originally picked this up based solely on the performers...Weird Al, the guys from Rifftrax, and Jon DiMaggio. Their performances alone sell this audiobook, especially DiMaggio. The story is wacky and reminded me of Pratchett and Dave Barry in the sense of numerous odd events and occurrences that don't really seem plausible but what the hell, let's just see where it goes. Listened to this during a road trip and laughed out loud more than a couple of times. Not a book that requires a lot of attention or deep thought, but great performances make it very enjoyable.

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3 people found this helpful

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    3 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Pretty cheesy

While listening to this, I had a distinct feeling that the author must have written up a screenplay for a comedy, shopping it around Hollywood, got absolutely no interest and figured making it an audiobook would be better than throwing it away completely. This impression is only strengthened by having a post-credits scene and blooper at the end. I have no idea if that's how this work actually came about, but that's definitely how it felt.
There are several familiar names in the cast list. I was frustrated that there is no list on the Audible page of who has what role. Not to worry; at the very end of the audiobook there is a credits section that explains that.
The humor is pretty juvenile. And for no good reason, a touch of horror is added in, mostly in the final chapter.
The 15 year old girl's voice is too old. The grandfather's voice is too young.
I feel like the author hoped to emulate Douglas Adams, but without any of his wit or clever writing.
It was still a fairly entertaining listen. I realize I'm sounding pretty harsh. I don't regret listening to this, exactly. It wasn't bad. Just not what I hoped it would be, and certainly not in my top ten of sci-fi comedies. I feel most people will listen to it because of the voice actors, and not because of the plot - although it's possible fans of American comedies may find it extremely enjoyable.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Light-hearted and fun!

I really enjoyed it! The plot was fun and surprising and the production was excellent. Reminded me a lot of Hitchhiker's Guide, both in the story and the audio styling - the full cast and sound effects were reminiscent of the original BBC production. And any audio book with Bender (John DiMaggio), Avatar Korra (Janet Varney), and Weird Al Yankovic doing voices must be good!

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9 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Weird, quirky and funny!

OMG! I bought this on a total whim because I saw that so many MST3K alums did the voices. I finished it in a day--now I want to listen to it again! The story is all over the map. It all begins when Kara's supposedly dead grandfather appears in a stolen sports car and wants to take her to HAWAll (note--this does not say Hawaii), and she jumps at the chance to escape her dreadful summer job with her weepy school principal (Weird Al Yankovic!). Things start out a little weird and gradually become completely bizarre. People who love off-beat humor (like Weird Al and MST3K) will love this book. I am hoping for more from this author, hopefully with the same cast to do the voices. The production was nicely thought out with incidental noises in the background to help set the scenes. I really liked that it was humorous without insulting my intelligence. If you will like this book, you probably already know it. Already waiting for the next one...

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7 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

the cast is AMAZING

had fun with this listen. laughed out loud many times. ending could have been punchier but i enjoyed it a lot. cheered me up when i was upset.

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3 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Hilarious!

A must listen for fans of MST3K and Rifftrax! I hope there's a sequel!

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

You will love this by minute 3

the audiobooks I am used to are back in the old cassette days where you mom puts it on during a road trip and where one person reads out all the terrible things the guy from the kiss the girls audiobook did with that snake.
Having a book read out in the vein of a radio play, with different voice actors is new for me heck I downloaded audible and bought the book after hearing the first sample. the voice work is amazing and Janet Varney is so good at conveying exasperation, its ridiculous.
the story has a few slow parts where things get over-explained thatbprobably work a lot better in the book, but in the reading starts to sound monotone, but that is understandable when explaining thing in detail verbally so it is not that big an issue, but if that is the biggest complaint, that's saying something.
worth a buy and worth a listen.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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An imaginative and hilarious story

Loved hearing the cast of MST3K perform this book along with Janet Varney Weird Al and the other cast members. Highly recommend to everyone who is a fan of comedy.

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3 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars

Good fun!! Joyous listen from start to finish

I wanted to get this book as soon as I saw the pre-order, but then I kind of forgot about it, but I am glad I finally decided to pick it up. Good fun listen, albeit a bit self-deprecating, as the main characters are the worst, but they are the worst in a good kind of funny and humorous way. Full cast does a splendid job, I enjoyed that they had different voices for different characters. If you need cheering up - this book is a good pick!

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1 person found this helpful