My Macaroni and Cheese Is a Lesbian Also She Is My Lawyer
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Narrated by:
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Georgia Bird
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By:
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Chuck Tingle
About this listen
Mona is on trial, and she’s absolutely terrified. After saying that chocolate milk is “better than sick water”, she’s being sued by water itself for a billion dollars. Fortunately, this food-and-beverage-based case is the perfect fit for her sentient macaroni and cheese lawyer, Hemma.
After showing off her skills on their first day in the courtroom, Mona and this living pasta dish go out to celebrate, and things quickly turn hot and heavy. Now, the two of them are back at the office in the throughs of lesbian living-food action, but will their hardcore encounter set in motion the death of their very own court case?
This erotic tale is 4,300 words of sizzling human on sentient mac and cheese action and living lesbian meal love.
©2021 Chuck Tingle (P)2022 Chuck TingleListeners also enjoyed...
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This Pumpkin Spice Latte Gets Me Off in a Fun and Sincere Way Because It’s Okay for People to Enjoy Popular Things Without Being Shamed for the Perceived “Basicness” of Their Beverage Choices
- By: Chuck Tingle
- Narrated by: Georgia Bird
- Length: 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Bobbi’s searching for inspiration at the local chocolate milk shop, heading out to cook up a few new short story ideas with a friend. Unfortunately, this typically productive location has become quite distracting thanks to the seasonal arrival of pumpkin spice lattes, which Bobbi despises. Hoping to seem cool and counteract the extreme basicness of this situation, Bobbi orders a cup of rock milk, but when she spots author Chuck Tingle at one of the café tables, Bobbi starts to wonder if rock milk was the way to go.
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Typical Chuck
- By GnomePatronus on 11-21-24
By: Chuck Tingle
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Not Pounded by the Physical Manifestation of Bisexual Gatekeeping Because It's Super Gross and If You Do It You’re Not the Hero You Think You Are, You’re Actually Just a Jerk
- By: Chuck Tingle
- Narrated by: Georgia Bird
- Length: 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
-
Story
After moving cross-county to Billings, Montana, Riley is desperate to make new friends and cultivate a support system. This search leads her to find the Billings Bisexual Buddies, an activity group for local bisexuals. Unfortunately, when Riley arrives she finds herself faced with an invasive questionnaire in order to “confirm” her bisexuality, and the skepticism only grows when Riley reveals her limited physical experience with the same gender. The group then suggests Riley pump up her numbers by heading out on a date with a beautiful sentient gate named Heather.
By: Chuck Tingle
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Not Pounded by Bi Erasure Because My Current Hetero-Presenting Relationship Does Not Invalidate My Queerness
- By: Chuck Tingle
- Narrated by: Georgia Bird
- Length: 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Selena is having a weird day. It starts off simple enough, with a few household items disappearing mysteriously, but things quickly turn heartbreaking when Selena’s office excludes her from a queer team-building workshop. According to Selena’s new boss, her current hetero-presenting relationship invalidates her bisexuality. Now Selena is on a mission to shake up the system and prove her new boss wrong, but as things continue to disappear around her, she realizes there’s more going than meets the eye.
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Please Don't Stop
- By Julie on 06-26-23
By: Chuck Tingle
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Bury Your Gays
- By: Chuck Tingle
- Narrated by: André Santana, Charlie Jane Anders, CJ Leede, and others
- Length: 10 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
-
Story
Misha knows that chasing success in Hollywood can be hell. But finally, after years of trying to make it, his big moment is here: an Oscar nomination. And the executives at the studio for his long-running streaming series know just the thing to kick his career to the next level: kill off the gay characters, "for the algorithm," in the upcoming season finale.
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The hype is real.
- By Dan Bugbee on 10-03-24
By: Chuck Tingle
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Just Kind of Ignoring This Sad Lonesome T-Rex Who Is Screaming "Debate Me" from His Folding Chair
- By: Chuck Tingle
- Narrated by: Georgia Bird
- Length: 21 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Jane is hoping to enjoy a nice dinner with her friend Brenna, but as soon as the night begins a conflict arises. Near the restaurant is a sad, lonesome T-Rex with a sign that says “debate me” rambling on and on about everything from "cancel culture" to “woke Stars War”. Fortunately, Jane and Brenna find the perfect solution to this strange dinosaur: They just ignore him. Can they maintain this self-imposed distance from the T-Rex who can’t stop proclaiming facts are better than feelings in this no sex tingler? The answer is yes, because this T-Rex is horrible.
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Life changer
- By meg on 05-06-24
By: Chuck Tingle
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Camp Damascus
- By: Chuck Tingle
- Narrated by: Mara Wilson
- Length: 9 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Welcome to Neverton, Montana: home to a God-fearing community with a heart of gold. Nestled high up in the mountains is Camp Damascus, the self-proclaimed “most effective” gay conversion camp in the country. Here, a life free from sin awaits. But the secret behind that success is anything but holy. And they’ll scare you straight to hell.
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A Horror That Hits Home
- By P Parker on 11-09-23
By: Chuck Tingle
-
This Pumpkin Spice Latte Gets Me Off in a Fun and Sincere Way Because It’s Okay for People to Enjoy Popular Things Without Being Shamed for the Perceived “Basicness” of Their Beverage Choices
- By: Chuck Tingle
- Narrated by: Georgia Bird
- Length: 23 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Bobbi’s searching for inspiration at the local chocolate milk shop, heading out to cook up a few new short story ideas with a friend. Unfortunately, this typically productive location has become quite distracting thanks to the seasonal arrival of pumpkin spice lattes, which Bobbi despises. Hoping to seem cool and counteract the extreme basicness of this situation, Bobbi orders a cup of rock milk, but when she spots author Chuck Tingle at one of the café tables, Bobbi starts to wonder if rock milk was the way to go.
-
-
Typical Chuck
- By GnomePatronus on 11-21-24
By: Chuck Tingle
-
Not Pounded by the Physical Manifestation of Bisexual Gatekeeping Because It's Super Gross and If You Do It You’re Not the Hero You Think You Are, You’re Actually Just a Jerk
- By: Chuck Tingle
- Narrated by: Georgia Bird
- Length: 22 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
After moving cross-county to Billings, Montana, Riley is desperate to make new friends and cultivate a support system. This search leads her to find the Billings Bisexual Buddies, an activity group for local bisexuals. Unfortunately, when Riley arrives she finds herself faced with an invasive questionnaire in order to “confirm” her bisexuality, and the skepticism only grows when Riley reveals her limited physical experience with the same gender. The group then suggests Riley pump up her numbers by heading out on a date with a beautiful sentient gate named Heather.
By: Chuck Tingle
-
Not Pounded by Bi Erasure Because My Current Hetero-Presenting Relationship Does Not Invalidate My Queerness
- By: Chuck Tingle
- Narrated by: Georgia Bird
- Length: 20 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Selena is having a weird day. It starts off simple enough, with a few household items disappearing mysteriously, but things quickly turn heartbreaking when Selena’s office excludes her from a queer team-building workshop. According to Selena’s new boss, her current hetero-presenting relationship invalidates her bisexuality. Now Selena is on a mission to shake up the system and prove her new boss wrong, but as things continue to disappear around her, she realizes there’s more going than meets the eye.
-
-
Please Don't Stop
- By Julie on 06-26-23
By: Chuck Tingle
-
Bury Your Gays
- By: Chuck Tingle
- Narrated by: André Santana, Charlie Jane Anders, CJ Leede, and others
- Length: 10 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Misha knows that chasing success in Hollywood can be hell. But finally, after years of trying to make it, his big moment is here: an Oscar nomination. And the executives at the studio for his long-running streaming series know just the thing to kick his career to the next level: kill off the gay characters, "for the algorithm," in the upcoming season finale.
-
-
The hype is real.
- By Dan Bugbee on 10-03-24
By: Chuck Tingle
-
Just Kind of Ignoring This Sad Lonesome T-Rex Who Is Screaming "Debate Me" from His Folding Chair
- By: Chuck Tingle
- Narrated by: Georgia Bird
- Length: 21 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Jane is hoping to enjoy a nice dinner with her friend Brenna, but as soon as the night begins a conflict arises. Near the restaurant is a sad, lonesome T-Rex with a sign that says “debate me” rambling on and on about everything from "cancel culture" to “woke Stars War”. Fortunately, Jane and Brenna find the perfect solution to this strange dinosaur: They just ignore him. Can they maintain this self-imposed distance from the T-Rex who can’t stop proclaiming facts are better than feelings in this no sex tingler? The answer is yes, because this T-Rex is horrible.
-
-
Life changer
- By meg on 05-06-24
By: Chuck Tingle
-
Camp Damascus
- By: Chuck Tingle
- Narrated by: Mara Wilson
- Length: 9 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Welcome to Neverton, Montana: home to a God-fearing community with a heart of gold. Nestled high up in the mountains is Camp Damascus, the self-proclaimed “most effective” gay conversion camp in the country. Here, a life free from sin awaits. But the secret behind that success is anything but holy. And they’ll scare you straight to hell.
-
-
A Horror That Hits Home
- By P Parker on 11-09-23
By: Chuck Tingle
What listeners say about My Macaroni and Cheese Is a Lesbian Also She Is My Lawyer
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- tim warner
- 08-12-23
Love is real!
A must listen for all buckaroos! Assume the pasta is vegan or gluten free as needed
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- meg
- 11-11-24
Forever changed
How can I explain how much this book has changed me?! These books make me laugh, cry, and all together change my day to day
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