In her recently released essay collection Black Friend, comedian and satirical talk show host Ziwe says it best regarding Britney Spears's infamous conservatorship: "What does it say about a society when one of its most famous women is held captive in plain sight as a result of our collective objectification and dehumanization?" The delicate question has been the subject of much discussion, from the New York Times documentary Framing Britney Spears to the Hulu-hosted TMZ Investigates: Britney Spears: The Price of Freedom and more.
With the release of her memoir, Spears finally weighs in on her own life, and she sets the record straight about everything from her days of early fame to life under conservatorship control, and all the ups and downs in between. Fans everywhere have been waiting for Britney’s take, and finally, at long last, it is here. The emotion in Britney’s voice is palpable as she reads the introduction herself, telling listeners that writing her story has been so "exciting and heart-wrenching" that she decided against narrating the entire work.
Instead, Spears turns over the mic to award-winning performer Michelle Williams who makes her audiobook debut and brings her incredible acting chops to the challenge of depicting one of America’s most famous women. Her narration is clear and calming, bringing a sense of serenity to Spears's incredible story. No stranger to portraying complexity, Williams is known for the depth, gravitas, and sensitivity she brings to her roles including her expert performances in My Week with Marilyn, Brokeback Mountain, and Shutter Island.
Living her dream
Britney on touring in the early 2000s
Below are some of the most notable moments from Britney Spears's long-awaited memoir:
Controlling Conservatorship
Conservatorships are meant to prioritize the wishes of the conservatee in an effort to help them regain their independence. They are also meant to be a last resort, of sorts, for individuals unable to meet their own basic needs. In Spears's case, she was performing internationally under the court-appointed conservatorship that controlled her every move for more than a decade:
"[I was] too sick to choose my own boyfriend and yet somehow healthy enough to appear on sitcoms and morning shows, and to perform for thousands of people in a different part of the world every week," Spears writes.
One particularly chilling memory Spears recalls was that of her father, who acted as a co-conservator of her estate along with an outside financial group, stating plainly, "I’m Britney Spears now."
Although Spears earned millions from performing, she had an allowance of $2,000 per week. In her memoir, Spears reveals that being bound to a conservator "comes with a lot of fear."
When the star's father was finally removed as her conservator shortly before the arrangement was ended, Spears shares that she felt relief sweep over her. "The man who had scared me as a child and ruled over me as an adult, who had done more than anyone to undermine my self-confidence, was no longer in control of my life," she writes.
Low Point
Britney on her struggles with mental health
Sexism in the media and dealing with fame
"Everyone kept making strange comments about my breasts, wanting to know whether or not I’d had plastic surgery," Spears writes. The distress of being in the public eye to such an extent caused her feelings of deep loneliness, and in her memoir, Britney reveals that she started taking Prozac as a way to cope with the intense scrutiny.
She also began taking Adderall, which, she writes, "made me high, yes, but what I found far more appealing was that it gave me a few hours of feeling less depressed."
American Music Awards
Britney on her iconic denim on denim moment with Justin Timberlake
Private struggles
In a particularly personal chapter, Spears describes in detail the decision she made to get an abortion after becoming pregnant while in a relationship with fellow pop star Justin Timberlake.
"It was a surprise, but for me, it wasn’t a tragedy. I loved Justin so much. I always expected us to have a family together one day. This would just be much earlier than I’d anticipated," Spears writes in her memoir. "But Justin definitely wasn’t happy about the pregnancy. He said we weren’t ready to have a baby in our lives, that we were way too young."
Together, the pair decided not to have the baby, a decision that Spears didn’t take lightly. Of the decision, Spears writes: "To this day, it’s one of the most agonizing things I have ever experienced in my life."
It takes courage to speak openly about abortion, and Spears's story sheds light on the fact that men also benefit from a woman’s right to choose while hardly ever acknowledging that.
Painful Breakup
Britney on life after heartbreak
The #FreeBritney movement
This viral-hashtag-turned-real-life movement was started by fans who could see that things were amiss with their idol. After doing some digging and learning about the conservatorship, these concerned fans started speaking up on Britney's behalf, initially launching FreeBritney.net in 2009, and eventually making enough noise to attract national attention.
"That was the most amazing thing I’d ever seen in my life," Spears writes in The Woman in Me, sharing that she first learned of the movement from a nurse in the rehab facility she was staying in while under the conservatorship. "I don’t think people knew how much the #FreeBritney movement meant to me, especially in the beginning."
What comes next for Britney?
"Pushing forward in my music career is not my focus at the moment," Spears writes. "It’s time for me not to be someone who other people want; it’s time to actually find myself."
