Randy Rainbow Sees the World Through Pink-Colored Glasses

Note: Text has been edited and does not match audio exactly.

Michael Collina: This is Audible Editor Michael Collina, and here with me today is the one and only Randy Rainbow, the viral three-time Emmy-nominated musical comedian and now memoir writer. Hi, Randy, and welcome.

Randy Rainbow: Hi, Michael, thanks for having me.

MC: Thank you so much for joining us. Playing with Myself is definitely a title that grabs your attention. So I wanted to ask, what inspired it?

RR: Well, first of all, Michael, I'm trying to sell some books. So I definitely wanted something that would grab your eye. Also I had a list of working titles that I was playing with and that one just seemed perfect because in addition to being slightly naughty—I'm a fan of people like Howard Stern and I enjoy his use of double entendre in his titles and things like that—It also just perfectly epitomizes my process in work and in life for the last 10 to 40 years. I'm really a one-man band in every capacity and that's what I've been doing. I'm also like a big kid, and all of this has sort of happened just from me playing around and playing dress-up basically in my living room. So I just thought it summed everything up.

MC: Yeah, I think it definitely does. And actually, since you mentioned your childhood, I wanted to bring up one of the big themes of this memoir. One of those big themes is show tunes and comedy in general and how they were such a comfort and an escape for you growing up. What was it about them that made it feel like such a safe space for you?

RR: Musicals were introduced to me at such a young age. My mother and grandmother were such fans of the genre. As I say in the book, my mother used to put me to sleep with the cast albums to The Music Man and Oklahoma! and reruns of Murder, She Wrote—by the way, she was trying to raise the gayest child on Long Island and she succeeded—actually who am I kidding? They were not reruns, they were probably original air. But anyway, musical theater has just always been my preferred language really; there was just something about it. 

"I've learned what comes from the heart goes to the heart."

As a kid I struggled with anxiety from a very young age, and there is just something about the art form and the lyrics of musical theater that bring order to chaos in a way that I think not many other things do. And I really responded to that and I found it helpful. My cast albums just lived in my ear, whether it be through headphones or just in my imagination or in my brain during school. They became like a friend to me and I would visit them constantly. They taught me so much about life, especially, you know, when I started getting into things like Sondheim musicals. It was just a major education for me and a safe space.

MC: One of the things you mentioned throughout this memoir is how you tend to think in show tunes too. So I wanted to ask, what does a typical day sound like in the head of Randy Rainbow?

RR: Oh! Oh, it's a nightmare! It's a blessing and a curse, Michael. It really is. My mother would walk around that house singing constantly and would just match any situation she could to its musical theater parallel. And that's kind of what I do. That's kind of how I used the songs that I parody now for my work. I think it's a coping mechanism. As I write in the book, if I burn my finger on a hot mug of coffee, instead of saying, “Ow,” I'll start singing “It's Too Darn Hot” from Kiss Me, Kate. And if something happens on the news, I'll go to the musical theater parallel.

So yeah, it's very musical in my brain. A coping mechanism, again, it's just a way of getting out of the reality of this world that we're living in.

MC: Yeah. But of all the coping mechanisms, I'd say that's probably the most fun one.

RR: Right. Pretty safe. It's not like drugs or alcohol.

MC: No, you're not hurting anyone. You're not hurting yourself. You're just bringing some joy to the world.

RR: Thank you, Michael. You're right.

MC: Right in the first chapter of your memoir, you mention that there's a difference between Randy Rainbow the performer and Randy Rainbow the person. And you kind of flirt with both when you're writing this memoir. Do you often find yourself having to juggle your public persona with, you know, Randy Rainbow the private person that you are in your day-to-day life?

RR: Yeah, that does happen a bit. Especially once I was invited to leave my apartment, where I create all of my videos, and go out on the road and tour and actually meet people face-to-face. I was kind of faced with this identity crisis because the version of me that people have come to know in the videos is a heightened, campy version of me. Certainly I'm not Meryl Streep, I'm not saying it's a complete departure. It's certainly an aspect of my character. But it's almost a parody aspect of me. 

For instance, when I'm onstage doing the concert show that I do now, it's not scripted. It's an evening with me and I really don't want to be phony in moments like that. I want to be genuine and be myself and have that connection with people. But I also want to give them a little bit of the, you know, razzle-dazzle from the videos. So it is a bit of a balancing act. Sometimes I don't feel like that cartoon character version of myself and I have to turn it on a little bit more than others. But I guess, you know, champagne problems. 

But it is interesting because people do assume that I am on all the time like that. And that's really the musical comedy version of me. I tend to be, when I'm by myself, very sometimes withdrawn and even shy and quiet.

MC: Yes. Speaking of, I was shocked when you shared that you were naturally an introvert when you weren't performing. Between juggling that public persona and all of the work that comes with it from the comedy tours, the YouTube videos, and now this memoir, how have you managed to protect your mental health and all of your "you time" with everything else that you're doing in your life?

RR: Oh god, who said I've managed?

MC: I think you've managed pretty well.

RR: Well, I try when I have downtime to allow myself to just detach, which means stepping away from social media. Which can be trying, because I'm addicted like everybody else. Going for a drink with my friends and just settling back into myself. Because it's hard, not just for me as a public person who goes onstage and goes on YouTube, I think just in this day and age, people are so connected that we all kind of feel that pressure to be on constantly. So I don't know that I've figured it out exactly yet. It's a daily practice.

MC: Yeah. It's a daily practice, but it seems like you've nailed it. At least from the outside looking in.

RR: Really? Well, I fooled you good, Michael.

MC: That's fine by me. In your memoir, you explain how your now signature pink glasses started as a bit of a gag in one of your videos, but they've since become pretty much a character in their own right. And though I know you talk about this in the memoir, for those who haven't listened yet, what do those pink glasses mean to you?

RR: Yeah, well that was one of the nice things about going out on the road and meeting some of the viewers of my videos. I got to hear from them what things like the pink glasses meant to them. And as I say, it just was a cheap sight gag in one of my earliest videos. I just thought it would be funny while I was pretending to be Anderson Cooper and conduct a serious interview to put on a ridiculous pair of glasses. So I just pulled this prop from a Halloween bag that I had in my closet. But during the Q&A portions of my concerts a lot of people started telling me these lovely stories about how they would put them on their kids for their first day of school. People would tell me that they were wearing the pink glasses to get chemotherapy treatments and things like that. And I realized that they kind of started taking on a life of their own. It really caused me to respect what they mean to me and give them a greater meaning. And so I've since really made them the mascot or the emblem of what I think I'm trying to ultimately do with my work, which is to see the world through rose-colored glasses, to be cliché, and just find the joy in whatever is happening, even in the most trying of circumstances.

They've sort of become, I hope, an outward expression of your inner magic and all of those things cooking on the inside that you might be too shy or afraid or withdrawn to express. That was certainly my story for much of my life, especially as a child. I was very shy and very nervous and would never have dreamed that I would be putting myself out there for all these people to see on the internet or standing in front of thousands on a stage. But something apparently happened to me along the way that allowed me to have the courage to do that, and so I like to think that the pink glasses are kind of an emblem of that courage.

But they're really just cheap plastic, Michael, let's be real. And they're available on my website now, randyrainbow.com. Thank you.

MC: Yeah. So everyone go to randyrainbow.com and get your own pair of pink glasses.

RR: Right.

MC: But I think it's the perfect emblem because it really does exhibit everything that you just said. I'm thankful that whatever happened in your life that made you have that courage to come out and perform and do these videos and these tours happened, because without it, I feel like there'd be a much bigger black hole in the world right now.

RR: That's so nice. Thank you.

MC: I wasn’t expecting the big reveal that you've never been a fan of musical parodies and would rather think of yourself as your own leading lady. How has that desire affected the topics that you cover in your videos or even the approach to your comedy in general?

RR: That informs really these videos. I'm not a fan of parody. This doing parody was sort of just a means to an end, because I don't write or read music and I needed something to sing and perform. That's how it all started. I just started ripping off other people's music and putting my own lyrics to it. That's not the driving force behind what I do. 

Sometimes people are surprised by the song choices, because they're not evident. I'm working on two parodies now that are probably Broadway B-sides. Many people will not know them, but I love them, and they're songs that I would want to perform. And I think that has been sort of a secret to my success, if I have any, is that I'm not going for the lowest hanging fruit. Sometimes I do. I'm not above some cheap wordplay every once in a while: “Desperate Cheeto” to “Despacito” is one of my biggest hits. Sometimes I'll go for it. 

But what people are seeing and what I think people are ultimately connecting the most to when they see my videos is someone playing dress-up and having a marvelous time and playing the characters and singing the songs that he normally, under regular mainstream everyday circumstances, would not be given the opportunity to do and sing and play.

And that's the joy in it for me. I've learned what comes from the heart goes to the heart. If it's something that I love and that I'm passionate about and having a great time doing, someone's going to connect with it the same way.

MC: Absolutely. Throughout this memoir, you make note of many of the legends that you've encountered and even befriended along the way. Just to name a few, there's Stephen Sondheim, Carol Burnett, Rosie O'Donnell, and Josh Gad. What was it like meeting and working alongside all of these icons?

RR: Well, Josh Gad, I mean, I basically made him what he is today and he'll tell you so himself. We grew up together and I talk about that in the book. There is quite a bit of name dropping in this memoir for many reasons. Number one, I always like that when I'm reading a memoir. I like when celebrities make cameos and I get to sort of get a glimpse into a moment that I otherwise wouldn't be privy to. 

But also celebrity has played such an important role in my story. I've used celebrity to kind of make my own name and create my own shtick. Back to the days when I was dating Mel Gibson—you have to read the book to get more on that—but I wanted to talk about how the celebrities and icons that really inspired me came full circle back into my life and kind of lifted me up. The ones that you mentioned, Rosie O'Donnell? That was a huge moment for me. Stephen Sondheim—getting to know him over the years. Carol Burnett—there's a whole chapter dedicated to the first time she called me. 

It was incredible. I really tried to highlight a lot of the women who inspired me. The book is dedicated to my mom and to the women who lifted and inspired me. There are chapters dedicated to Patti LuPone and Carol Burnett. These are icons who played a huge role in my coming up. The fact that they reached out and offered to bring me up was just incredible and a testament to the fact that dreams come true. It was just amazing.

MC: Yeah. Speaking of your coming up, do you think there was a particular moment where you realized that you had actually made it and become one of those icons yourself?

RR: Well, that's nice of you to say. All of those little moments that I write about in the book—Rosie O'Donnell, where she took me to dinner and then later shared a stage with me. Patti LuPone came over to my apartment and made a video with me. Carol Burnett has become such a support system. In those little moments I do pinch myself and say, "Oh my god, I guess I've arrived somewhere." 

"The main thing I'm trying to impart to younger people is that it's okay not to fit into a mold."

I don't know if I've reached icon status yet, although I hope I'm on my way. But it's just those little glimmers that you want to try to be aware of and appreciate as they're happening. That’s why I try to highlight them in the book, because in a way, this is kind of a bit of a scrapbook for me of all these great things that have happened so far. I wanted to remember them myself and share them.

MC: And thank you for sharing them, because as you mentioned, they're fascinating tidbits and they really are part of what make this story so interesting. 

Throughout your memoir, there are a couple of times you mentioned your own audiobook listening, mostly author-narrated memoirs from other great performers, like the one and only Patti LuPone. Would you say that you're a big listener yourself?

RR: I love listening to audiobooks. It's kind of my number-one way of ingesting books these days. I'm not a great reader, so I love it. I just downloaded Harvey Fierstein's audiobook. He's become a friend too, Harvey, and he's coming on my podcast next week. We're going to talk all about the book. I'm excited to get into that. But yeah, the Patti LuPone memoir was just life-altering for me. I'm always listening to comedians’ memoirs and stuff like that. There's lots of, like, Sarah Silverman, and Sebastian Maniscalco, and Amy Schumer, and Chelsea Handler, Steve Martin. Lots of comedians’ memoirs.

MC: So it only makes perfect sense that your memoir would be next to the lineup.

RR: Exactly, add me to the list.

MC: And since we're on the topic of narration, what was the narrating process like for you? Because you both wrote and performed this audiobook. Did it feel at all similar to your process for creating and filming your videos?

RR: It was very interesting. It was very cathartic in the same way that writing the memoir was cathartic, because, reading it out loud makes it take on a whole new meaning and gives it a whole new energy. Plus, I was in the room with strangers and it sort of was the first time that I realized, oh god, like, strangers are going to actually hear some of these most intimate details of my life and childhood. And it made me a little nervous, I'll be honest with you. But it was great. It was a wonderful experience. When I make the videos, I'm really in full performance mode and this was the first time that I was quote unquote “performing,” but as myself, and as raw and as real as I've ever been as myself. So it was certainly a new experience, and a little scary, but I loved it. I loved every minute of it.

MC: And thank you for taking that scary experience head-on and letting us into your life and your childhood. Because, one, it was fascinating, but two, I think a lot of people will relate to it. I mean, there were certain parts of your childhood where I was like, “Wow, I see myself in your story.” I was also a shy, kind of overweight kid who relied on comedy to feel included and make friends. So it's definitely impacted me, and I've seen myself in you and your story and your experiences.

RR: That is so nice, Michael, and the best compliment you can pay me. And that's really the reason that I was excited to write this, because I've been over the years offered opportunities to write books, usually like novelty. Someone asked me to write a whole book about my love of Andrew Cuomo. Thankfully I had the foresight to turn that one down. 

When they offered me the opportunity to write a real memoir, I felt a little uncomfortable with the idea. But going back to the Q&A portions of my live shows, there's a lot of young kids and a lot of parents of young kids who are interested in my childhood and who are gracious enough to thank me for inspiring their kids and letting them know that it's okay to be themselves. I wanted to really write this for those kids. 

Also the other reason was, I was really ready to introduce myself in a real way. Those novelty books didn't really interest me. This was a chance to really say like, “Hey, everybody, this is the real me.” And I was craving that realness.

MC: Yeah. And you nailed it. You mentioned that your story was dedicated to your mom and all of the other women in your life who raised you up. Your mom, Gwen, makes a guest appearance in this memoir. Was that always important to have her involved in telling your story?

RR: Well, I didn't have a choice, Michael. She insisted that she'd be featured prominently and guest on the audio. She is also reading her own portion of our conversation. She plays a huge part in my life and in my upbringing obviously, so I wanted her absolutely to be a major part of this book. There's a lot of moms in my audiences who are interested in that relationship of mother and son that we had. I wanted to give that to them finally and let them in a little bit on that relationship, which is complex at times. She's a pain in the ass, certainly like any mother, but she's been my greatest champion and she's hilarious. And she really is the reason that I am who I am.

MC: And I loved the fact that she was included and so involved in this because it really does add that extra element. 

Since you talk so much about your creative process throughout your entire story, I had to ask, is there anything you're working on right now that you can give us a little behind-the-scenes insight on?

RR: I'm working on some good-old-fashioned Randy Rainbow song parody videos right now. There's wigs flying around, and costumes. As soon as I hang up with you, I've got a major fitting in the next room. That, and I'm getting ready to go back out on tour. I'm excited to do the book tour. There's also some Pink Glasses Musical tour stuff happening this spring. That's it. Getting ready for this book launch, which I'm very excited about.

MC: I'm so excited. That all sounds so fabulous. And speaking of tours, I actually attended the Denver stop of your Pink Glasses tour last fall and I loved it. You were fabulous as always. But I also absolutely loved the Q&A session that you did at the end. I know you've brought it up a couple times during our conversation, and you call it out in your memoir as being one of your favorite parts of every show.

One of the questions that I heard get asked a lot and really stuck with me was about reaching out to younger audiences. In your book, you explicitly call out Millennials and Gen Z a couple of times throughout. With that in mind, is there one thing that you'd really want a younger audience to know or take away from your story?

RR: The main thing I'm trying to impart to younger people is that it's okay not to fit into a mold. It's okay to be confused and not know which path you belong on and to take your time getting wherever you're going. I didn't find my way until I was into my 30s and that's okay. 

One of the earlier chapters talks about an experience I had with being cast in a production of South Pacific and ultimately being fired because I wasn't butch enough to play the role. That kind of sent me into a spiral of not knowing where I belonged, or if I could do this thing that I loved, or where I would fit in. It took me since that time, 20 years ago, whatever it was, to find my path, but it all worked out. So I guess the message I hope younger people take away from this story, if anything, is to calm the hell down and do the thing that brings you the most joy, and it will ultimately lead the way for you.

MC: And is there anything you would want to say to your younger self knowing where you are today and everything that you've accomplished?

RR: Well, exactly that: calm hell down. And I would like to say that to my present-day self too, because that's an every day kind of challenge as well, trying to live in the moment and not worry about what lies ahead, and am I doing the right thing? It's a constant struggle and it doesn't make it easy that there's all these show tunes playing in my head all day long, the whole time I'm trying to navigate that. It's very confusing.

MC: Confusing, but again, not the worst thing to have playing in your head.

RR: Enjoyable for others, at least.

MC: And actually, one other thing I noticed at that show is that you got asked out a lot in that Q&A section. Does that happen a lot at your shows?

RR: I did? Wait, which city was this?

MC: This was in Denver.

RR: Denver. Oh my god. I have to tell them to book me in Denver again.

MC: Does that happen a lot?

RR: It happens from time to time. Listen, I'll say it, I'll blow my own horn a little bit. It's never amounted to anything though, I'm sad to report. I'm really bad with that. After a show, I go right back to the hotel room, there's no socializing. I have to try to have a little more fun. Thank you for reminding me of that. It's a nice boost of self-confidence for the day.

MC: Oh, of course.

RR: Wow, Denver. I'm making a note. I have to tell my agent book Denver this fall.

MC: Yeah. Come back to Denver. We'd love to have you again.

RR: Okay, I'll be there.

MC: Thank you so much for taking the time to chat and for sharing your story with us and with the world, Randy.

RR: Thank you so much, Michael. It's been a pleasure. And enjoy Playing with Myself, playing with yourself, whatever you feel like doing.

MC: We absolutely will. And for everyone listening, Randy's memoir, Playing with Myself, is available right now on Audible. So go listen.