Why it’s essential
While some people find the optimism in self-development books intimidating, Dr. Russ Harris seeks to address the topic from a fresh angle. Harris writes for the anxious, the unsure, and most importantly, the skeptical, offering a method to achieve long-term confidence while embracing any personal hang-ups. Anyone looking for a change in life would be wise to consider Dr. Harris's advice.
Featured in The Top 100 Well-Being Listens of All Time.
What is The Confidence Gap about?
In this comprehensive self-help book, Dr. Russ Harris presents his method to achieve a higher level of confidence and greater self-worth. Harris understands the power of anxiety and self-imposed limitations, but rather than avoid these deeply human traits, he prescribes an approach that attempts to harness them for personal gain. Offering plenty of concrete examples and exercises, this book truly meets you at eye level.
Editor's review
Seth is an Audible editor and a certified podcasting fanatic. He lives for historical fiction, music and film analysis podcasts, and well-placed Oxford commas.
In a sea of compelling and well-researched books focused on self-betterment, The Confidence Gap offers one of the most earnest and achievable goals. In terms of pure personal impact, Russ Harris’s words left a strong impression on me and continue to affect my life.
I tend to be pretty skeptical when authors attempt to change my mindset. When it comes to books that make promises like this, I am more of a "guilty until proven innocent" type of guy. This book, however, really did reframe some of my most foundational qualities. Adopting clinically proven techniques from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Dr. Harris seeks to rewrite our relationships with our own anxieties and limitations.
A psychotherapist and a medical doctor, Dr. Harris believes that we are misusing what he considers to be some of our most useful instincts. He advises that attempting to apply brute force to insecurities will generally not only end in failure and frustration, but can even create a worse relationship to that particular feeling. At first, I did not understand where he was taking this point, but Harris quickly offers an elegant solution. Rather than seeing my weaknesses as a burden, I could instead apply them as assets to tackle life’s greatest obstacles. This is no snake oil pitch, as all of Dr. Harris’s claims are backed up by verified Acceptance and Commitment Therapy research.
Dr. Harris’s pragmatic approach to self-development really resonated with me. I am not the kind of person who believes in quick fixes, and that is not what The Confidence Gap offers. Rather than relying on a gimmicks and, ultimately, skimming the surface of self-confidence, Harris challenged me to look within myself, identify what I believe is holding me back, and then make it my ally. As I know from experience, this process requires work—luckily, this book comes with plenty of exercises to help its many lessons sink in. After investing time and effort in The Confidence Gap, I have found that I look at my own limitations with a deeper understanding and with something resembling fondness.
While any fan of self-development media will likely enjoy this book, I think this is an especially good one for skeptics like me. Dr. Harris makes no bones about some of life's most difficult hurdles. He knows that there are countless self-help titles out there, and he does not attempt to compete with them by spewing the same mantras we have all heard countless times. This is self-development for people who recognize their blemishes and personal hang-ups. Rather than seeking to fix your life in one go, Harris will guide you to instill values that are designed to help build confidence from the ground up.
Did you know?
Russ Harris has benefitted directly from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. His experiences as a doctor and therapist led him to share this treatment with not only his patients but also other doctors and the general population.
Since 2005, Harris has run more than 800 two-day workshops at the professional and personal level.
What listeners said
"Russ Harris is a guru for the pessimist set. Mindfulness without the affirmations. There's no magic here. But there are plenty of thought exercises to help you accept yourself and to make your best decisions, sitting with your anxieties and fear, but seeing past them." — Susie, Audible listener
"The world is full of advice on boosting confidence, and most of it is crap. This book lays out the reasons why and replaces the crappy rules with ones to live by. I'm going to read it at least once again. Already, I have been living by what I've learned from this book and it's really helped. I recommend this book to anyone and everyone who's ever struggled with motivation, discipline, or confidence." —Diana, Audible Listener
"In summary, if you experience anxiety and want to increase confidence then The Confidence Gap is the book for you. It's interesting, well-written and directly applicable to life. It takes work, though—you have to do the exercises and put in some time to increase certain mindfulness skills. It's worth the work it takes, though!" —Riker, Audible listener
Quotes from The Confidence Gap
"The world is full of people who are trying to purchase self-confidence, or manufacture it, or who simply posture it. But you can’t fake confidence, you have to earn it. If you ask me, the only way to do that is work. You have to do the work."
"What holds you back is not fear, but your attitude towards it. The tighter you hold on to the attitude that fear is something 'bad' and you can’t do the things you want until it goes away, the more stuck you will be."
"Fear is not your enemy. It is a powerful source of energy that can be harnessed and used for your benefit."
"Rule 1: The actions of confidence come first; the feelings of confidence come later."
About the author and performer
Dr. Russ Harris is a world-renowned trainer in ACT, psychotherapist, medical doctor, life coach, and consultant to the World Health Organization. He has run hundreds of workshops, providing training for more than 50,000 health professionals around the world. He is the author of nine books, including The Confidence Gap and The Happiness Trap, which has sold more than a million copies worldwide and been translated into 30 languages.
