Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now!

Divinyls – “I Touch Myself” (1990)
★ ★ ★ ★ ☆
Genre: Sexy Pop-Rock with a Side of Subtle Shouting

If you’ve ever wanted to tell the entire world you’re into yourself—like, really into yourself—but with an Aussie accent and a jangly guitar riff behind you, "I Touch Myself" is your anthem.

Released in 1990, this song boldly launched a thousand awkward glances across car radios, shopping centre PAs, and family BBQs. It’s essentially a public service announcement for private pleasure. The late, great Chrissy Amphlett croons with the kind of sultry conviction that makes you wonder whether she’s flirting with you or challenging you to a fight. Possibly both.

Musically, it’s a classic pop-rock banger dressed in leather and smirking. The guitars chug along with a no-nonsense energy, while the chorus barrels in like a drunk confession that somehow made it onto Top of the Pops. It’s catchy. Dangerously catchy. You’ll find yourself humming it at work and immediately questioning your life choices.

Lyrically, it’s… well, it’s not subtle. There’s no poetic metaphor here—no “my flower blooms in solitude” kind of vibe. Just straight-up: “I touch myself.” A line that makes 13-year-olds giggle, adults pretend not to hear, and cool uncles nod in silent respect.

What’s genuinely impressive is how it flipped the script. At a time when most female-fronted pop-rock was still toeing the line between “empowered” and “palatable,” Amphlett smashed that line with a riding crop and lit a cigarette on its ashes. It’s one of the few songs where the chorus feels like both a dare and a declaration.

Final Verdict:
"I Touch Myself" is a bold, brash, unashamed celebration of self-love with a riff you can strut to and a chorus you probably shouldn’t sing in front of your boss—but will anyway. And honestly? That’s kind of the point.

DUBBY
DUBBY is declaring WAR on big Energy! Use the promo code "1001songs" at checkout for 10% off!

Support the show

Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/1001songsthatmakeyouwanttodie/
Follow us on TikTok: @the1001crew

Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now!

Chamillionaire – “Ridin’” [feat. Krayzie Bone]
Universal; 2006
6.4 (but only if you're in a Dodge Charger with illegal tints)

“Ridin’” is the rare kind of song that makes you feel both like a criminal and a misunderstood philosopher—if your philosophy thesis is mostly about how the cops are always watching, especially when you’re doing absolutely nothing suspicious in a 22-inch rimmed Escalade at 3am.

Chamillionaire, whose name sounds like a Monopoly villain, delivers a performance so straight-faced it could pass a lie detector test while stealing your catalytic converter. Backed by a beat that somehow evokes both “Matrix car chase” and “Windows XP screensaver,” he lays out a lyrical treatise on racial profiling, vehicular paranoia, and the delicate art of looking fly without catching a felony.

Enter Krayzie Bone, who slides into the second half of the track like your friend who showed up late to the heist but still brought the good balaclavas. His rapid-fire verse is technically impressive and emotionally impenetrable—a poetic flurry of words that makes you think, “Wow, this is definitely about something deep,” even if you catch about three words total.

“Ridin’” had the cultural reach of a flu strain. It was everywhere. Car stereos. Flip phones. Your cousin’s MySpace page. It was a protest anthem, a meme template, and a ringtone all rolled into one—basically, the Swiss Army knife of 2000s rap.

Is it a good song? Kind of. Is it a perfect song for imagining yourself in a slow-motion low-speed chase through a Taco Bell drive-thru? Absolutely. “Ridin’” doesn’t care if you’re actually ballin’—it just wants you to feel like you are, especially when you’re crawling through traffic with two broken taillights and something mysterious in the glove box.

DUBBY
DUBBY is declaring WAR on big Energy! Use the promo code "1001songs" at checkout for 10% off!

Support the show

Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/1001songsthatmakeyouwanttodie/
Follow us on TikTok: @the1001crew

Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now!

Flo Rida – “In the Ayer” [feat. will.i.am]
Atlantic; 2008
2.1

If you’ve ever stared into a lava lamp and thought, “What if this could somehow be a song?”—well, congrats, your dream was made flesh in In the Ayer, the auditory equivalent of bedazzled cargo shorts and Axe body spray. Flo Rida, not known for subtlety or, say, substance, teams up with the ghost of will.i.am’s interest in music to bring us a track so hollow, it could be used as a teaching tool in physics classes on resonance chambers.

“In the Ayer” (yes, ayer, because why not butcher a vowel for swag?) is essentially a three-minute motivational poster shouting “PARTY!” at you in all caps. The beat is what you might hear if someone fed a Casio keyboard nothing but Red Bull and positive affirmations. will.i.am contributes the kind of hook that makes you question whether he was even in the studio or just texted it in from a pool float somewhere in Ibiza.

Lyrically, Flo Rida invites you to "throw your hands up" roughly every five seconds, suggesting he might be confused and think he’s leading a hostage negotiation. Every verse feels like an inspirational quote with a concussion. The only thing more repetitive than the chorus is the sinking feeling that this song was engineered in a lab to sell energy drinks.

And yet, for all its sins, “In the Ayer” is weirdly indestructible—like glitter, or Guy Fieri. It’s not a song so much as a vibe you regret catching. Somewhere, right now, it’s still echoing in the background of a nightclub bathroom, and you know what? That’s exactly where it belongs.

DUBBY
DUBBY is declaring WAR on big Energy! Use the promo code "1001songs" at checkout for 10% off!

Support the show

Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/1001songsthatmakeyouwanttodie/
Follow us on TikTok: @the1001crew

Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now!

Luke Bryan – “That’s My Kind of Night”
⭐️ 1.9 / 10
Label: Cliché Hat Records, a Division of Bud Light Sounds

If a monster truck rally had sex with a Bass Pro Shops flyer during an Axe Body Spray commercial, the baby would be “That’s My Kind of Night.” And that baby would grow up to wear cargo shorts year-round and call every woman “ma’am,” regardless of age.

Luke Bryan, country music’s reigning fratboy-in-chief, delivers this track like he’s double-fisting a Natty Light and reading lyrics off the back of a hunting permit. It's less a song and more a checklist of things a 12-year-old thinks are cool: trucks, beer, girls in painted-on jeans, trucks again, the moonlight, catfish dinners, and did we mention trucks?

Musically, it’s a country song in the same way a microwave burrito is Mexican cuisine – technically accurate, deeply offensive, and likely to make you question your life choices. The beat is a Frankenstein’s monster of pop-country gloss and trap-lite drum loops, which means it will either make you dance or commit a minor crime in a Walmart parking lot.

Lyrically, Bryan sounds like he dared himself to cram every bro-country trope into a single three-minute yeehaw. "I got that real good feel good stuff up under the seat of my big black jacked-up truck" – which is exactly the kind of sentence you hear before someone revs an engine at a red light and then crashes into a Chili’s.

And don’t worry, he rhymes “corn” with “horn” and “party” with… “party.” Twice. Shakespeare is shaking in his boots.

You get the feeling that Luke Bryan wrote this on a napkin after doing shots of Fireball with the Duck Dynasty guys. And that napkin then somehow won a CMA award.

Recommended if you like:

• Mud for recreational purposes
• Songs that think “fishing” is a personality
• The idea of consent, but not the practice

Final thought: This isn’t a song. It’s a backwards hat doing donuts in your soul.

DUBBY
DUBBY is declaring WAR on big Energy! Use the promo code "1001songs" at checkout for 10% off!

Support the show

Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/1001songsthatmakeyouwanttodie/
Follow us on TikTok: @the1001crew

Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now!

Fergie – “Fergalicious”
⭐️ 2.1 / 10
Label: A Delicious Flop Pastry Records

Ah yes, “Fergalicious” – the 2006 cultural artifact that dared to ask: what if a spelling bee had a sugar crash during a rave at Claire’s Accessories?

Fergie, freshly emancipated from the Black Eyed Peas’ deeply important catalog of "My Humps" and "Let’s Get Retarded," decided it was time to define her solo artistry by shouting her name over a beat that sounds like a Fisher-Price drum machine possessed by Satan's annoying little cousin.

There’s a beat, technically. There are lyrics, allegedly. Will.i.am, never one to skip a paycheck or a confusing production decision, blesses the track with all the subtlety of a jackhammer in a porcelain museum. Together, they craft a song that’s somehow both aggressively confident and terminally insecure – like if Regina George had access to FruityLoops and unresolved trauma.

Lyrically, it’s a feminist manifesto if feminism were exclusively about making boys drool while you “be up in the gym just workin’ on your fitness.” Fergie is your witness. We know this because she tells us. Over. And over. And over.

To its credit, “Fergalicious” is deeply committed to being what it is: a chaotic, hyper-glossed sugar rush of ego and electroclash. It is the sonic equivalent of chewing 14 pieces of Hubba Bubba while being screamed at by your older cousin who just discovered ringtones.

You don’t listen to “Fergalicious.” You survive it. You emerge on the other side a little dumber, a little gayer, and a lot more appreciative of silence.

Recommended if you like:

• Spelling your name in public
• The scent of pink glitter
• The phrase “tasty, tasty” shouted at 120 bpm

Final thought: It’s not so much a song as it is a personality disorder set to a ringtone.

DUBBY
DUBBY is declaring WAR on big Energy! Use the promo code "1001songs" at checkout for 10% off!

Support the show

Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/1001songsthatmakeyouwanttodie/
Follow us on TikTok: @the1001crew

Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now!

Scandal’us – Me, Myself & I (2001)
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ (Pitchfork, 10.0)

In an era bloated with faux-indie self-seriousness and turn-of-the-millennium testosterone-pop, Me, Myself & I arrived like a rhinestoned meteor, obliterating subtlety and redefining post-reality-TV sonic maximalism. What begins as a breakup anthem quickly transcends genre, gender, and good taste, ascending into something close to pop transcendence. The chorus, a rallying cry of self-sufficiency, lands with the force of a glitter bomb in a therapist’s office—half defiance, half denial, all iconic. It’s not just a song; it’s a syllabus in empowerment, delivered with the emotional range of a confetti cannon and the production sheen of a freshly laminated soul. In a just world, this would play every time someone leaves a toxic relationship and when they finally delete Facebook. Scandal’us weren’t just Popstars winners—they were oracles. And Me, Myself & I is their shimmering, immaculate prophecy.

DUBBY
DUBBY is declaring WAR on big Energy! Use the promo code "1001songs" at checkout for 10% off!

Support the show

Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/1001songsthatmakeyouwanttodie/
Follow us on TikTok: @the1001crew

Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now!

Oh, of course Charli XCX is definitely just recycling that ultra-sophisticated, high-brow techno pop from the early 2000s—you know, the era of iconic lyrical masterpieces like "My Humps" and "Blue (Da Ba Dee)." She's just sitting in her neon-lit studio, sipping Surge, thinking, "What the world really needs right now is the spiritual successor to Eiffel 65 but with more eyeliner and existential dread."

Because when Charli painstakingly curates glitchy hyperpop layers, collaborates with bleeding-edge producers, and redefines digital pop for a new generation… that’s clearly just a carbon copy of that time Cascada told us every time we touched, we got this feeling. Groundbreaking stuff.

And don’t even get me started on her wild originality—like using autotune and synthesizers. No one's ever done that before. I mean, Britney Spears? Never heard of her. Daft Punk? Total unknowns.

Charli’s entire aesthetic? Just a Hotmail-era fever dream with a Y2K choker slapped on it. Her fans don’t appreciate nuance and innovation, they just miss Motorola ringtones and LimeWire viruses.

So yeah—if you think Charli XCX is just rehashing bad techno pop from the early 2000s, congratulations on having the musical analysis depth of a dial-up modem.

DUBBY
DUBBY is declaring WAR on big Energy! Use the promo code "1001songs" at checkout for 10% off!

Support the show

Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/1001songsthatmakeyouwanttodie/
Follow us on TikTok: @the1001crew

Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now!

Squidward is a grumpy, artistic octopus from SpongeBob SquarePants, known for his long, droopy nose that often reflects his mood and expressions. His nose is frequently the punchline of jokes—getting caught in doors, inflated, or mistaken for other objects—making it a running gag in the series. It symbolizes his exaggerated self-importance and often becomes a target of SpongeBob’s oblivious antics.

DUBBY
DUBBY is declaring WAR on big Energy! Use the promo code "1001songs" at checkout for 10% off!

Support the show

Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/1001songsthatmakeyouwanttodie/
Follow us on TikTok: @the1001crew