Welcome to the Called to Love Podcast!

In this episode, I am joined by New York Times best-selling author, speaker, podcaster, advocate for Downs Syndrome kids, and adoptive mom: Heather Avis. Heather started “The Lucky Few” movement to change the narrative behind children with Downs Syndrome. She says every time her kids walk out her door and into the world, they are walking into a world that does not value them.

As Heather shares in this podcast episode, if the narrative behind Downs was different it is likely the bio families of her two kids wouldn’t have put them up for adoption. Adoption inherently comes with the breaking of what God created to be together: family. There is immense beauty and joy in adoption, in redeeming what has been broken, but we cannot shy away from or “fix” that brokenness. It can be a hard thing to sit with but it cannot be ignored. Still, Heather advocates not only for the value of children with special needs but she encourages Christian families to consider adoption. This calling may not be easy but it is a calling straight from God - to love the widows and orphans.

In our discussion, we unpack Heather’s incredible adoption story. She shares wisdom from her experience raising not only two children with Downs syndrome but also a bi-racial child that does not have special needs.

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation:

• The importance of letting go of control in parenting.
• Create an inclusive home environment for children of all backgrounds.
• Encourage curiosity and understanding differences in children.
• The significance of affirming children's worth and identity.
• Recognizing the ongoing struggles of children with disabilities in society.
• The value of connecting with resources and stories from adoptees and birth families.

Connect with Heather Avis on social media or learn more on her website.

You can also buy her books! Her new book is titled I Like You So Much

You can also learn more about The Lucky Few Foundation.

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Welcome to the Called to Love Podcast!

In this episode, I am joined by Susan TeBos, an author and adoptive mom to three now-grown children. Susan shares her experiences and insights on parenting adopted teenagers, focusing on the unique challenges they face as they process loss and identity. She emphasizes the importance of creating safe spaces for emotional expression, recognizing warning signs, and building trust through consistent communication. Our discussion highlights the need for adoptive parents to be patient and understanding as their children navigate their feelings and experiences related to adoption.

There is a myth that if you adopt a child straight when they are born, take them home from the hospital, that somehow there is no trauma or loss. This isn’t true, and I have first hand experience with it. Our kids may exhibit the trauma in different ways or at different stages of life, but there is trauma due to the loss of one’s biological roots. Susan described her kids as being “fun and playful” during their younger years, but showed more of those signs of trauma as they entered puberty.

I hope that through this episode, you will be more equipped to support your adoptive or foster kids, even if they haven’t entered their teenage-years yet.

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation:

• Adopted teens process loss in unique ways.
• Curiosity can lead to clarity and compassion in parenting.
• Consistency in communication builds trust with teens.
• Parents should recognize warning signs of emotional distress.
• It's important to check in with teens regularly about their feelings.
• Adoptees often feel alone in their experiences and emotions.
• Grieving is a process that should be shared with parents.
• Parenting adopted children is a lifelong commitment.
• Understanding adoption-related issues is essential for emotional support.

Connect with Susan TeBos on Facebook or Instagram

You can also check out her website and her book, “We've Been There: True Stories, Surprising Insights, and Aha Moments for Adopted Teens”

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Welcome to the Called to Love Podcast!

In this episode, I am joined by Kate Rietema. Kate is an author, speaker, and mama to five kiddos, some adopted and some biological. In our conversation, we discuss how to navigate sharing your child’s adoption story with them. Adoption is beautiful but it comes at a huge loss, a heartbreak for our kids, and it can be hard to share this with them or help them understand it in a way that helps them still feel loved and chosen.

Stories are powerful and the stories our foster and adoptive kids tell themselves have a huge impact on their identity and worldview; that is why it is crucial we carefully craft a story that rings true Biblically. It is also important to pause when our child wants to tell us something about their past, and be there, listening and supporting.

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation:

• Storytelling helps build strong identities in adopted children.
• It's important to highlight both the difficult and beautiful aspects of adoption.
• Creating a culture of openness allows for ongoing conversations.
• Children often want to hear stories about themselves.
• Patience is key when introducing sensitive topics.
• Listening is more important than responding immediately.
• Resources like life books can help children understand their stories.
• Trusting in the Lord's plan is essential for adoptive parents.

Connect with Kate on Instagram or check out her website

You can also find her books on Amazon or wherever you find your books.

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Welcome to the Called to Love Podcast!

In this episode, I am joined by a dear friend, author, speaker, and host of the Radical Radiance podcast, Rebecca George. Rebecca is sharing her heart and experiences as we discuss God’s timing and how hard it is to wait. Our hearts are longing, especially in this calling, and that longing isn’t bad but it can easily turn into an idol. So, how do we navigate this God-given longing while honoring Him in the waiting?

The truth is the longing doesn’t stop even when we’ve reached the point we’ve been praying and waiting for. A new longing takes its place. This is why it is so important we learn how to be present with God in the season He’s put us in right now and trust His timing.

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation:

• You're not too late, trust God's timing.
• Longing leads to more longing in life.
• It's important to celebrate others' blessings.
• You need a support system in your journey.
• Be honest before the Lord about your desires.
• Don't miss out on your life today.
• Learn how to talk about your journey.
• Your longing is valid and part of your story.

Connect with Rebecca on Instagram or her website! Listen to the Radical Radiance podcast wherever you find your podcasts.

Check out her brand new book, which sparked today’s conversation: “You’re Not Too Late: Trusting God’s Timing in a Hurry-Up World”

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Welcome to the Called to Love Podcast!

In this episode, I am joined by a fellow adoptive mom, Megan May. Megan is also a self-published book author and creator of the You Matter Boutique which is designed to create meaningful things for both birth-moms and adoptive moms. Originally, Megan wanted zero kids, but God had other plans. Now Megan is the joyful mother to three biological children and one adoptive daughter.

God does not offer us happiness or comfort in this life but we can definitely experience His joy which is far greater. God also likes to change our plans and change our hearts, which is exactly what happened to Megan. Adoption can feel scary, stressful, and daunting as we might feel unequipped, imposter syndrome, and uncertainty–that’s why we wanted to emphasize the joy in this episode!

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation:

• Adoption can bring immense joy despite its challenges.
• Finding joy in the hard moments is essential.
• It's okay to feel doubt and fear when considering adoption.
• Choosing joy is a daily decision that can transform lives.
• Creating a culture of joy in the home is vital for family dynamics.
• Community support can help find joy during tough times.

Find Megan’s Self Published Book: “From Zero to Four - My Journey Of Stepping Into A Life I Did Not Plan”

Check out the You Matter Boutique

Follow Megan on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/youmatter.boutique/

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Welcome to the Called to Love Podcast!

In this episode, I am joined by author and adoptive father, Matt Lambert. Matt and his wife live in the UK with their two adopted children. Through the adoption experience, Matt unpacked some of his own brokenness and began to experience spiritual healing as he was “adopted by God.” This inspired him to write his book “Adopted by God: Healing Through Connection to the Father” which is the topic of our conversation. How does the adoption process bring up your own burdens, childhood memories or trauma? For Matt, it was feeling disconnected and misunderstood by his own parents, because he was “weird.” He reframed this as an adoptive parent in a lightbulb moment as being “wired” by God in a unique way. This realization helped him in raising his adoptive children, who also have attachment and connection struggles.

Together, we talk about the spiritual healing that can happen with this calling because it is so closely aligned to God’s love for us - adopting His broken children. We are broken as parents, so how do we raise our adopted and fostered kids, who inherently experience brokenness too?

Here are a few takeaways from our conversation:

• Adoption can lead to significant personal growth.
• Therapeutic parenting is essential for adoptive families.
• Self-examination is crucial for effective parenting.
• Neurodiversity impacts family dynamics and parenting styles.
• Healing often comes through understanding one's own brokenness.
• Parenting is a long-term journey, not a quick fix.

Matt Lambert’s Book: Adopted by God: Healing through connection to the Father

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Welcome to the Called to Love Podcast!

In this episode, I ask the question posed by many in the foster care system: should I adopt my foster kids? How will I know if that is what God is calling me to do? Or… what if He says no? I share statistics, information, but also share my personal experience where God told our family “no” to an adoption and I was not expecting it. As I like to say, in this calling you must “love fiercely and hold loosely.” In this calling, you have to be prepared for the unexpected, various outcomes, unknown possibilities and know God is with you every step of the way. Prayer is crucial, as well as unity in your marriage, and your support systems.

Hopefully, through this episode, you are better equipped to face those situations…

Here are a few takeaways:

• Statistics show that 400,000 children enter foster care annually.
• Adoption through foster care is often unpredictable.
• Foster parents must guard their hearts due to impermanence.
• Congruent planning can put pressure on foster parents.
• Unity in marriage is crucial for decision-making.
• Children in the home should be a top consideration.
• Not every foster child is meant to be adopted.
• Peace in decision-making is a sign of God's will.
• Listening to your body's stress signals is important.

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

Welcome to the Called to Love Podcast!

In this episode, I am joined by author and adoptive mama, Jessica Mathisen. In light of Foster Care Awareness Month, we discuss Jessica’s profound journey into foster care and adoption. We dive into unique family dynamics, the calling to foster care, the challenges faced by foster parents, and the importance of community support. It is crucial there is unity in marriage before stepping into this calling because the support and foundation is needed when facing the emotional, mental, and sometimes physical demands of this calling.

Our conversation also turns to emotional complexities that come with fostering or adopting such as facing infertility. Jessica shares her personal experiences and insights, providing encouragement and practical advice for those considering or currently navigating the foster care system. Jessica shares her journey through foster care and adoption, discussing the challenges and joys of welcoming children into her home. She emphasizes the importance of community support, the need for older children in care, and the reality of disruptions in foster placements. Jessica also highlights the significance of trusting God's plan and finding joy amidst the challenges. Additionally, she introduces her new children's book, 'No Matter Where I Go,' which aims to provide resources and support for families navigating foster care.

Here are a few takeaways:

• Every foster parent has a unique story and experience.
• Motherhood can be defined by love, not biology.
• Building a care team can ease the journey of fostering.
• Foster care and adoption are not solutions for infertility.
• It's important to involve children in the family mission of fostering.
• Older children in care, especially teenagers, need loving homes.
• Seeing a child in need can change perceptions and reduce fear.
• Disruption in foster care can be necessary for safety.
• Children in foster care still love their biological families.

Learn more about Jessica Mathisen: https://www.jessicanmathisen.com/

Connect with Jessica Mathisen: https://www.instagram.com/jessicanmathisen/

Her new book and excellent resource for families: click here

Christian Parenting’s Faith Centered Gift Guide: https://www.christianparenting.org/articles/gifts/

You can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!