Podcast (Season 2, Episode 2) – Connecting with your lover - physically, emotionally and mentally 

Transcript:

Hello there! Today we're going to be speaking about mental, emotional and physical connections with our partners / lovers. The reason I find this so exciting and so important is it's really useful and empowering to organise what is being received and being given in a relationship, so that we can become conscious of what's coming into us, and what's coming out of us. And if there's anything that we want to change, we can then do it.

So I'm going to propose to organise the energetic interaction between you and your partner or your future partner in the following three categories.

Mental 
These are the ideas, the discussions, the decision making, that goes on between you.

Emotional
Emotional connection is about love. It's about feeling, it's about intimacy, it's about romance. It's about that feeling in the heart “Wow, I love you so much, I feel so much love from you”. And actually beyond the giving and receiving, it's when we fall in love with our partners. We are opening something within ourselves, which is our true nature. And sometimes it's hard to find, to discover, to celebrate, to reveal that love until we meet someone that just opens those doors. Somehow they have the key to just open our hearts. And when we do, when we open our heart to another person and we feel with them, it stimulates self-love, it stimulates love for everything; for oneself, for ‘other’, for the entire life process.

Physical 
And then we have physical and that's about primarily well-being. It's also about pleasure, ecstasy, orgasm, sexual. It's also about how to live together, resource allocation, boundaries. Okay, so as I say these things you may be thinking, Well, yeah, the mental - very good, emotional - sometimes difficult, physical - really working out here but not here.

So if you if you look at your relationship and become conscious of the mental, the emotional and the physical connection, you can start learning to master it at an even higher level. And then decide what is it that you wish to receive? And what is it that you wish to give? How do you like to be loved, heard, held, seen? What can you offer? And perhaps there's some bits that are missing in your relationship? And you can ask if this something that you need from the relationship? Or could you outsource it to another relationship? Now when I say that, I don't mean multiple sexual partners. I'm talking about maybe having more friends, having a guy's group, a girls group. Looking really honestly ‘what are your needs?’ And where are they being met. And if you feel like you don't deserve for them to be met, then exploring that. So that you can uncover where the shame around that need is. So that it can transform into something amazing. You know, then a relationship becomes not something difficult, or an annoying thing or a challenging thing, but actually something very beautiful. There are challenging moments but it's totally worthwhile. It becomes the very apex of life.
To have a best friend with benefits. You know, somebody who is your lover, your best friend, your soulmate, your mirror, your twin flame. I'm using poetic language but somebody you can trust [and] someone who's there for you. Someone who sits, sits with you side by side, as you eat your dinner. You're on the same team. You want what's best for each other. You love each other not because of what the other one's going to give you, but because of who they are, and the essence of who they are. Open something within yourself that brings you so much joy!

Presence 
And the last final piece, and I leave it for the end, ‘who is aware of the mental emo