Send us a text

aaaAAAaaa walked into this episode like a man determined to prove that rock bottom is not a location but a state of cocktail consciousness. Thus was born "The Rejected Offering" a hotdog martini that immediately triggered a collective, visceral “oh no” from everyone present. Built from ketchup, spicy brown mustard, muddled relish brine, lemon juice, vodka, and a hefeweizen float “for bread,” this drink was essentially a liquid Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest. Garnished with teeny weenies, it was more an act of performance art than a beverage. And of course, when the others revolted after their first sips, aaaAAAaaa — like Cain, but with a higher tolerance — drank all three.

Scriptures: [00:33:37]
Moroni took us through Moses 5, the moment the family of Adam graduates from “naked gardening” to “institutionalized murder and cult formation.” Using the Pearl of Great Price remix of Genesis — the version God allegedly showed Moses through a burning 19th-century VR headset — Moroni highlighted just how much of this chapter gets repurposed verbatim in the LDS temple endowment. The angel explaining sacrifice? The law-of-sacrifice phrasing? Eve’s “Wherefore, we rejoice…” line? Yep — straight from Moses 5.

We get the classic beats: Adam tills, Eve “also labors with him” (the scriptural equivalent of saying “she helped”), everyone starts having kids with everyone else, and suddenly Cain and Abel exist to reenact the world's first true-crime documentary. Moroni walked through Cain’s floor-fruit offering versus Abel’s blood sacrifice, God’s weird favoritism, and Cain’s bisexual-coded “Who is the Lord that I should know him?” before the inevitable rock-to-head fratricide. By the end, God curses Cain, darkness spreads, and the entire human family structure starts looking like a closed-circle Utah genealogy chart.

Church Teachings: [00:55:31]
Abish pulled apart how LDS doctrine diverges sharply from Jewish, Catholic, Protestant, and Islamic readings of Cain and Abel. Instead of the usual ambiguity about why Cain’s offering failed, Mormonism declares — with the certainty of a bishop who’s never read any other scripture — that Cain lacked faith, lacked sincerity, lacked righteousness, and possibly lacked good produce. Other traditions debate symbolism; Mormonism insists it was an obedience test with Jesus foreshadowing baked in.

She outlined the uniquely Mormon additions: Satan personally tutors Cain in Evil 101, the introduction of Master Mahan as the prototype of all future “secret combinations,” and the idea that organized global evil can be traced directly to Cain’s LinkedIn job title. Abish also highlighted how LDS materials have canonized Cain’s curse, his “mark,” and his role as the template for apostasy itself. And then, because this is GASP, she delivered the pièce de résistance: Master Mahan as a Joe Smith original, referenced twice in scripture and then never again, like a catchphrase from a failed 1830s sitcom.

History: [01:18:20]
Abigail kicked off a multi-week descent into the Satanic Panic, starting with the cultural soup of the 60s–80s: horror movies, the rise of the Religious Right, pop psychology’s obsession with “unlocking your inner trauma,” and the widespread misuse of hypnosis by therapists who should absolutely not have been allowed to possess clipboards.

Follow us on Insta @gr8_and_spacious, Twitter @gr8andspacious, and Reddit u/gr8_and_spacious for behind-the-scenes shenanigans, hilarious memes, and maybe even a sneak peek at our next episode..
If you've got a burning question, a hilarious anecdote, or just want to say hi, shoot us an epistle at greatandspaciouspod@gmail.com.
And don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a review of our podcast!

Send us a text

What started as a pie night turned into aaaAAAaaa dragging Abigail and Moroni into a full musical fever-dream about 90s Mormon Thanksgiving. We made a whole-ass AI musical — 15 original songs — and reacted to it live together like a group memory séance. Expect missionaries breaking rules in the basement, an operatic Jell-O salad declaration, the Second Coming of dessert, and the world’s longest prayer set to music. We laugh, wince, bond, and eventually crash back into the present… where we realize everyone went home and we’re the adults stuck cleaning. This may be the most unhinged, nostalgic, and heartfelt episode we’ve ever done.

Follow us on Insta @gr8_and_spacious, Twitter @gr8andspacious, and Reddit u/gr8_and_spacious for behind-the-scenes shenanigans, hilarious memes, and maybe even a sneak peek at our next episode..
If you've got a burning question, a hilarious anecdote, or just want to say hi, shoot us an epistle at greatandspaciouspod@gmail.com.
And don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a review of our podcast!

Send us a text

Intro
Moroni kicked things off this week with a drink that was equal parts chaotic and on-brand. He walked us through his creation, the “Fig Leaf Martini”, a cocktail whose theological accuracy is at least as questionable as its citrus content. The intro drifted through pop-culture tangents, general unruliness, and all the normal pre-scripture mayhem that happens when he’s at the wheel — literally this time, since he recorded on the road.

Scriptures: [00:34:56]
Abish took us into Moses 4, and she did not hold back. She went line by line through the “Fall of Adam and Eve” narrative, but with the emotional realness that the text itself refuses to allow. She spent most of the segment interrogating how the church frames Satan’s access to the garden, God’s voyeuristic “Where art thou?” routine, Adam’s blame-shifting, Eve’s eternal PR disaster, and the downright bizarre sewing-fig-leaves-with-vines situation. She also brought receipts detailing just how incoherent, contradictory, and unresolvable modern LDS doctrine is on literally every part of this chapter. It was half theology deep-dive, half roast session, and fully unhinged in the best way.

Church Teachings: [01:04:56]
aaaAAAaaa decided to outsource his entire segment this week by reading a Q&A he had previously done with ChatGPT about Moses 4. What followed was one of the funniest “official-ish doctrine” breakdowns we’ve had yet. He hit everything: whether the Fall was scheduled, why the church retroactively calls Eve heroic while still throwing her under the cosmic bus, whether God is just a divine Peeping Tom spying on naked people who don’t know what naked is, and how the church squares Satan entering Eden through a snake door. It was chaotic, deeply doctrinal, and ended up revealing just how much of LDS theology is an ever-shifting patch job held together by vibes, correlation, and selective memory.

History: [01:27:11]
Abigail wrapped up the episode with the full cultural, political, and cinematic history of Satan — not the theological being, but the American invention. She traced how Cold War paranoia, the Manson murders, the rise of serial killers, the birth of the religious right, televangelists like Falwell and Robertson, and movies like Rosemary’s Baby, The Exorcist, and The Omen combined to manufacture the Satanic Panic pipeline. She walked us through how Mormonism, eager for social legitimacy in the 60s and 70s, grabbed onto evangelical “spiritual warfare” rhetoric and never let go. By the end, Satan had gone from ancient adversary to full-blown American pop icon, political boogeyman, and Relief Society cautionary tale. It was a tour through fear, folklore, mass media, and the uniquely American tendency to blame the devil for everything from feminism to disco.

Follow us on Insta @gr8_and_spacious, Twitter @gr8andspacious, and Reddit u/gr8_and_spacious for behind-the-scenes shenanigans, hilarious memes, and maybe even a sneak peek at our next episode..
If you've got a burning question, a hilarious anecdote, or just want to say hi, shoot us an epistle at greatandspaciouspod@gmail.com.
And don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a review of our podcast!

Send us a text

Abish brings in The Fall, a cranberry-ginger-pomegranate-gin concoction anchored by Trader Joe’s seasonal soda and garnished with pomegranate seeds as a nod to the “forbidden fruit.” The gang immediately veers into a full dissertation on Trader Joe’s plants, tiny grocery aisles, ginger snaps, and then somehow a 20-minute side-quest about Lagoon ride safety (or lack thereof). It is peak “welcome to the podcast, we’ve missed chaos.”

Scriptures: [00:24:16]
aaaAAAaaa takes Moses 3 and turns it into a deranged sci-fi lab log written by Dr. E. Lohim, creator of “living meat prototypes.” Adam becomes a beta-tested dirt man given CPR, Eve is printed from a rib in a 3D-bioprinter, and the garden is essentially an overfunded tech demo with terrible UX. The team spirals into bits about Adam trying to fuck every animal, God being forced to make Eve because Adam was an annoying “hey dad hey dad hey dad” only child, and the Hebrew behind “help meet” actually meaning an equal— something millennia of men conveniently edited out. It’s equal parts theology, parody, linguistic correction, and unhinged improv.

Church Teachings: [00:41:11]
Special guest Claudia dives into men’s mental health and how the church frames it—namely, that men are expected to be stoic, preside, provide, and repress every human emotion until it leaks out as a midlife crisis, a podcast, or a Toyota Tacoma. She breaks down the church’s gender expectations, the false dichotomy of “priesthood = strength, womanhood = nurturing,” and how harmful the “men don’t need emotional support” narrative really is. The crew riffs on cultural conditioning, therapy avoidance, and how Mormonism treats emotional vulnerability in men like a contagious sin. It’s shockingly tender, deeply real, and still full of jokes.

History: [01:19:29]
Abigail covers Harold B. Lee, president, bureaucratic fanatic, and one of Mormonism’s top contenders for “Least Fun Man in History.” She traces his Idaho upbringing, his obsession with discipline and order, his meteoric rise through church admin roles, and how he essentially architected correlation—centralized control disguised as spiritual efficiency. Abigail quotes some of his most cringe-inducing lines about women, obedience, and domestic hierarchy, and pairs them with her own early-marriage horror stories to show just how deeply his ideology soaked into Mormon culture. It’s part biography, part feminist takedown, part comedy roast—classic Abigail.

Follow us on Insta @gr8_and_spacious, Twitter @gr8andspacious, and Reddit u/gr8_and_spacious for behind-the-scenes shenanigans, hilarious memes, and maybe even a sneak peek at our next episode..
If you've got a burning question, a hilarious anecdote, or just want to say hi, shoot us an epistle at greatandspaciouspod@gmail.com.
And don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a review of our podcast!

Send us a text

aaaAAAaaa kicks off with Let There Be Lime, a bright, creamy gin-based drink with lime juice, coconut cream, and a float of blue curaçao that looks “like the firmament if God had a tiki phase.” It’s equal parts creation myth and vacation cocktail—light, tart, and spiritually confusing. Between sips, the crew detours into Trader Joe’s cheese obsessions, Halloween charcuterie feats (“the meat hand”), and a long tangent about the economics of SNAP benefits that somehow circles back to cheese again. By the time anyone remembers they’re supposed to talk scripture, everyone’s already half-drunk and defending kale as if it’s theology.

Scriptures: [00:26:43]
Moroni covers Moses 2, Joseph Smith’s fanfic rewrite of Genesis. He performs it as a full-blown comedy sketch, with “Ancient Chats with Moses” hosted by God Almighty himself. Together, God and Moses walk through creation like a chaotic divine podcast: day one light mode, day two plumbing the firmament, day three inventing kale “to keep people humble,” and day six “beta testing humans.” The hosts argue about the physics of light existing before the sun, roast the logic of creating mosquitoes, and crown day seven “brunch day.” The moral? God invented gays so they could invent brunch.

Church Teachings: [00:45:20]
Abish dives into the church’s official take on creation and how much of it hinges on “order, obedience, and divinely appointed gender roles.” She walks through a church lesson that tries to marry literal creationism with modern science, calling it “a theological hostage negotiation.” The group debates why Mormon God micromanages planets like a middle manager at a failing startup, how “six days” somehow equals “six creative periods,” and how members are still expected to treat both evolution and the six-day creation as equally true. It’s the usual mix of reverence and rage—with sidebars on BYU professors, temple endowment parallels, and how women are expected to “create life” while men “create podcasts.”

History: [01:22:54]
Abigail returns with another prophet bio—this time Joseph Fielding Smith, the ultimate fun-hater of Mormonism. She kicks off the segment mid–Taco Bell Baja Blast cream pie taste test (verdict: “it’s like key lime pie, but with a hint of dew”) before diving into the century-long life of the man who hated evolution more than Satan himself. Born in 1876 and made an apostle by his father in 1910, Smith spent fifty years as church historian—basically in charge of gaslighting the entire religion into consistency. Abigail reads his wildest quotes: evolution “is as false as its author who reigns in hell,” and “a man who believes in evolution has no right to teach in the church.” She skewers his books Man, His Origin and Destiny (“Darwin is a fugly slut”) and The Way to Perfection (“Mormon Doctrine, but make it racist”), tracing how his anti-science tantrums still ripple through LDS culture today.

Follow us on Insta @gr8_and_spacious, Twitter @gr8andspacious, and Reddit u/gr8_and_spacious for behind-the-scenes shenanigans, hilarious memes, and maybe even a sneak peek at our next episode..
If you've got a burning question, a hilarious anecdote, or just want to say hi, shoot us an epistle at greatandspaciouspod@gmail.com.
And don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a review of our podcast!

Send us a text

The gang is back from hiatus, a little crusty but ready to dive into The Pearl of Great Price. Moroni kicks things off with the Son of God Sour, a divine little mix of bourbon, amaretto, lemon juice, and honey (or simple syrup, if you fear God less). The drink is meant to “know its divine worth,” which it does—bold, sweet, and just a little tart, much like the hosts themselves. The crew then recaps their cursed break: Abish’s nightmare Disney trip, Abigail’s and aaaAAAaaa’s southern misadventures at a vow renewal and pole-dancing class, and Moroni’s Ohio rollercoaster’s both literal and emotional. It’s a fittingly unhinged welcome back to the scriptures.

Scriptures: [00:54:19]

Abish breaks down Moses 1 and the cosmic fever dream that is Joseph Smith’s “translation” of Genesis. Set in 1830, Joseph’s new baby church is barely two months old when he decides to write a prequel to the Bible—because, apparently, God needed a director’s cut. The revelation introduces a God who creates “worlds without number,” tells Moses “you are my son,” and lets him see all creation in a dramatic lightshow. Moses promptly faints like a Victorian lady, wakes up to find Satan asking for worship, and tells him to piss off. Abish walks us through how this text flips Calvinist theology on its head: instead of depraved worms begging for grace, humanity is divine—“ants with potential,” as she puts it. The crew jokes about Moses as God’s exhausted intern, Satan as an emo theater kid, and Joseph Smith’s flair for turning blasphemy into branding.

Church Teachings: [01:13:20]

aaaAAAaaa digs into what the church officially says about Moses 1 and the Pearl of Great Price, pulling from an online church lesson manual. The emphasis is on “divine identity”—that all people are literal children of God—which the church manages to make simultaneously comforting and hierarchical. They discuss how this concept feeds into Mormon exceptionalism (“you’re divine, but only our kind of divine”) and the endless pressure to be godlike by next Tuesday. The conversation spirals into musings about eternal potential, weird church art depicting pre-mortal Moses, and whether “divine identity” still counts if you’re late on tithing.

History: [01:43:57]

Abigail takes us on a wild, bird-filled tangent before diving into the history of the Pearl of Great Price . Between discussions of ravens, ducks, and horrifying bird anatomy, she explains how this grab-bag scripture came to be. Originally compiled in 1851 by Apostle Franklin D. Richards in Liverpool, the Pearl was a scrapbook of Joseph’s “miscellaneous bullshit”—snippets of the Book of Moses, the Book of Abraham, a few hymns, and leftover revelations stapled together for British converts. Orson Pratt later padded it with fragments from the RLDS archives, and by 1880 it was canonized—essentially turning Joseph’s napkin doodles into holy writ. Abigail calls it “the bottom of the Mormon purse,” full of gum wrappers, half-translations, and divine side quests. She caps it off by gleefully pointing out all the things left out of the canon—Joseph’s most chaotic edits, contradictions, and hallucinations that even 19th-century Mormons thought were too weird.

Follow us on Insta @gr8_and_spacious, Twitter @gr8andspacious, and Reddit u/gr8_and_spacious for behind-the-scenes shenanigans, hilarious memes, and maybe even a sneak peek at our next episode..
If you've got a burning question, a hilarious anecdote, or just want to say hi, shoot us an epistle at greatandspaciouspod@gmail.com.
And don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a review of our podcast!

Send us a text

In today's episode Abigail, aaaAAAaaa, and special guest Lem discuss Denver Snuffer, and Lem tells all about their experience in that offshoot of the church. Also, they are all super baked. So, there are definitely tangents about things ranging from Mark Hofmann to probably less mormon adjacent things.

Enjoy, and we will be back with The Pearl of Great Price and the beginning of season 3 next Sunday!

Follow us on Insta @gr8_and_spacious, Twitter @gr8andspacious, and Reddit u/gr8_and_spacious for behind-the-scenes shenanigans, hilarious memes, and maybe even a sneak peek at our next episode..
If you've got a burning question, a hilarious anecdote, or just want to say hi, shoot us an epistle at greatandspaciouspod@gmail.com.
And don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a review of our podcast!

Send us a text

To commemorate finally escaping the swamp of the Doctrine & Covenants, Abish mixed up The Pearl of Great Peach (or Peach of Great Peach, depending on which name makes you laugh harder). It’s a fizzy peach-and-raspberry concoction topped with champagne and Chambord, garnished with peach slices, and best enjoyed while shouting “never again” at the bound copy of the D&C on your shelf . The crew also celebrated with a rowdy D&C trivia drinking game, where every wrong answer meant drinks—and every answer that was “Joseph Smith” meant everyone had to drink.

Scriptures: [00:39:23]

aaaAAAaaa tackled Section 138, Joseph F. Smith’s vision of the spirit world, and turned it into a fever-dream monologue. Instead of reverent scripture, listeners got a full-blown parody of Spirit Prison as a seminary classroom with eternal fluorescent lights, folding chairs multiplying like locusts, and missionary lessons that never end. Jesus shows up with a clipboard, Adam holds his scriptures upside down, Isaiah mutters hashtags, and the vending machines only dispense Bit-O-Honey and warm Sprite. The moral? Missionary work is eternal, naps are holy, and warm milk is cursed.

Church Teachings: [00:55:15]

Moroni dove into the many changes made to the D&C over the years. From Joseph’s 1833 Book of Commandments (cut short by mob violence), to Orson Pratt’s 1876 overhaul that added plural marriage (and dropped the monogamy section, wink wink), to the 2013 edition’s grammar clean-up, Moroni laid out how “continuing revelation” basically means “God changed his mind again.” Along the way, the hosts riffed on how the church votes on canon like it’s a bad HOA meeting, joked about Joseph’s endless pseudonyms, and noted how “doctrinal confusion” magically disappears when the PR department says so.

History: [01:11:48]

Instead of history, Abigail read a “Dear Abby” letter from listener, and former guest host, Eliza who wrote about feeling abandoned by God, suffocated by church teachings, and unsure what to do with mounting doubts. Abigail responded with compassion, validation, and a good dose of practical advice: you don’t have to cling to institutions that harm you, you’re not broken for asking hard questions, and joy is worth chasing outside the church. It was the perfect way to end the D&C slog—closing not with Joseph Smith’s nonsense, but with real human honesty from the community.

Follow us on Insta @gr8_and_spacious, Twitter @gr8andspacious, and Reddit u/gr8_and_spacious for behind-the-scenes shenanigans, hilarious memes, and maybe even a sneak peek at our next episode..
If you've got a burning question, a hilarious anecdote, or just want to say hi, shoot us an epistle at greatandspaciouspod@gmail.com.
And don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a review of our podcast!