“Sex isn't really worth having without vulnerability.”

Sexuality and intimacy can be sensitive topics, especially in long-term relationships. But what if these conversations could be transformed into pathways to deeper connection and more fulfilling, mutually satisfying sex? In this episode, we’re thrilled to welcome our first couple(!) to Hotter Than Ever: Vanessa and Xander Marin. Vanessa, a licensed psychotherapist with 20 years of experience, and her husband, Xander, bring their unique perspectives together to foster honest, vulnerable discussions around sex and intimacy. Together, they’ve written the NYT bestselling book “Sex Talks” and are on a mission to help couples achieve true closeness.

Join us for an illuminating conversation on the essential ingredients for a rewarding sex life and on dismantling long-standing misconceptions about intimacy. This episode is a powerful reminder that true intimacy—whether in long relationships or new ones—requires courage, open communication, and a fresh look at what we really need and desire. We discuss:

• Why open conversations about sex are crucial for fostering intimacy and connection between partners.
• Breaking down male expectations around intimacy and performance, and how these notions can block true connection and vulnerability.
• Prioritizing quality over quantity in sex—focusing on enhancing pleasure and satisfaction over frequency.
• Practical, small-scale actions to boost emotional intimacy, like expressing gratitude, embracing a 30-second hug, or sharing a 6-second kiss.
• Cultivating your own individual sexuality to reinforce a sense of self and desire, no matter your relationship status.
• Navigating sexual changes through perimenopause and menopause, with tips on staying connected to your body and sexuality.

OUR GUESTS: Vanessa and Xander Marin are the dynamic duo behind the NYT bestseller “Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life”. Vanessa, a certified sex therapist, and her husband Xander, who left a career at Google to join her in this mission, combine their expertise and candid, down-to-earth approach to help couples kick shame out of the bedroom and embrace deeper connection, pleasure, and joy. Together, Vanessa and Xander have been featured in top publications like O, The Oprah Magazine, Harper’s Bazaar, Vogue, and Goop, and Vanessa has contributed to The New York Times, Allure, and Lifehacker.

Want more Vanessa & Xander? Tune into their podcast Pillow Talks for practical relationship advice, real-life insights, and plenty of laughs as they share what truly goes on behind closed doors.

Follow them on:

• Instagram: @vanessaandxander
• TikTok: @vanessaandxander
• YouTube: @vanessaandxander
• Facebook: @vanessaandxander

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If you’ve ever wondered why stories of women in midlife are so rare in movies and TV, you’re not alone. In a landscape where male-centered narratives often take center stage, Laura Fischer (Co-President of director Paul Feig’s feature film company Feigco) stands out as a force for change. In partnership with the iconic comedy director, Laura champions films anchored by funny women (think Kristen Wiig, Melissa McCarthy and Leslie Jones) and helps showcase the work of diverse creators while balancing the complexities of family life and career with remarkable grace and determination.

Join us as we delve into issues impacting women today, from societal expectations to the untapped potential of stories about older women, all through the lens of Laura’s inspiring career. Laura’s journey underscores the power of authentic storytelling and the importance of defining your own priorities amid the many roles we, as women, navigate. Here’s what’s on the table:

• Embracing failure as a normal part of creative and professional growth.
• Practical tips for managing the ever-elusive work-life balance as a mother and professional.
• Why prioritizing YOU—and the pursuits that ignite your passion—helps you best show up for the people you love and support.
• Post-divorce insights: successful co-parenting and the liberating freedom of prioritizing yourself and your work.
• Breaking free from the constraints of corporate life to unlock personal and creative freedom.
• The ongoing fight for representation of women over 40 in media and why more female voices in decision-making roles matter.
• A reminder that at every stage of life, you have the power to choose your own path.

OUR GUEST: Laura is Co-President of Feigco Entertainment, where she and Paul Feig oversee the company’s film and TV projects, currently including A Simple Favor 2 for Amazon. She also serves as CEO of Powderkeg, a content company dedicated to uplifting female, LGBTQ+, and BIPOC creators. Through Powderkeg, she has launched programs like Fuse, a short film initiative for emerging female directors, and Break the Room, focused on diverse writing talent. Previously, Laura led original series production at Yahoo! and worked on Emmy-winning projects at Disney-ABC. She is a member of the Producers Guild and the Television Academy.

Want more Laura? Find more of her work at https://x.com/Feigco and https://powderkegmedia.com/ and follow her on:

• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lcallen11/
• IMDb: https://www.imdb.com/name/nm10895092/

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Find episode transcripts at www.hotterthaneverpod.com

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Ever wondered why some women experience low libido and what can be done about it? Or what orgasms look and feel like for different women? These questions often go unanswered, but Dr. Maureen Slattery—a board-certified OBGYN specializing in sex and menopause—is here to change that. A leading advocate for women’s sexual health, Dr. Slattery joins us in this episode to share her mission of empowering women through education and enhancing sexual well-being during perimenopause and menopause.

Join Erin and Dr. Maureen as they dive deep into the complexities of women’s sexual health, exploring how reclaiming pleasure and purpose can be a transformative experience in midlife. We discuss:

• Why comprehensive sexual health education is often overlooked in the medical field, and the consequences for women’s health.
• How puritanical and patriarchal attitudes have shaped women’s sexual education and self-understanding.
• The effects of hormonal changes on sexual pleasure, desire, and overall well-being.
• Understanding low libido and Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder (HSDD).
• Tips for having open, productive conversations about sex and pleasure, especially in long-term relationships.
• The importance of raising sex-positive children and navigating talks about consent, relationships, and body positivity.

OUR GUEST: Dr. Maureen Slattery is a board-certified OBGYN with 20 years of experience, specializing in sexual health and menopausal care. An AASECT-certified sex counselor, she has contributed to AARP and Rochester Regional Health on topics like sexual health and hormone therapy. Maureen teaches medical students and professionals about menopause and sexual health in Rochester, NY, and at the University of Michigan. Her passion lies in helping patients rediscover pleasure and educating healthcare providers about sexuality. She is a sex-positive, kink-aware, and LGBTQIA+ ally.

Want more Dr. Slattery? Follow her on:

• Instagram: @drmaureenslattery
• LinkedIn: @maureen-slattery-md-csc-abs

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Find episode transcripts at www.hotterthaneverpod.com

Follow us on:

• Instagram: @hotterthaneverpod
• TikTok: @hotterthaneverpod
• Youtube: @hotterthaneverpod
• Facebook: @hotterthaneverpod

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