Dave and Bethlie discuss words that destroy marriage from Proverbs 12.

Our words can do massive damage:

• When we speak in "never" and "always"
• When we are mean.
• When we make broad assumptions.

Beware of the "norms" in our society

1. Sarcasm
2. Belittling
3. Negativity
4. Unkindness
5. Rudeness

Determine to be different by:

1. Gratitude is healthy
2. Kindness is healthy
3. Sincerity is healthy
4. Gentleness is healthy
5. Respect is healthy

Proverbs 11

Teaching our children to have Integrity

What it is?

1. It is honesty v. 1
   1. The quality of being honest and having strong moral principles that one refuses to change (Cambridge Online Dictionary)
      1. Think of Joseph and Potiphar’s wife
      2. Think of Daniel and his three friends in Daniel 1
         1. And again in Daniel 3 when they wouldn’t bow to the false god
         2. And again in Daniel 6 when Daniel prayed even though it meant death
   2. This was an old command reiterated by Solomon
      1. Deuteronomy 25:12-14
      2. Proverbs 16:11 and 20:10
   3. It was a sin addressed by Hosea in 12:7
   4. We must teach our children to always be honest
   5. For us, this was a spanking matter
   6. Matthew Henry says “He is not an honest man that is not devout; he is not a godly man that is not honest.”
   7. Dishonest business dealings are offensive to God
   8. Nothing is more pleasing to God than fair and honest dealing
      1. It models who God is
      2. He will do right every single time . . .
2. It is humility v. 2
   1. Notice that it is the opposite of pride
      1. Nebuchanezzar was severely judged by God for his pride
      2. Herod was as well.
   2. Notice that it is blessed by God
      1. Humility leads us to wisdom
3. It is uprightness v. 3
   1. The word means correct; right; straight
   2. Psalm 25:21 Let integrity and uprightness preserve me; for I wait on thee.
4. It is righteousness. v. 4-6

Why it matters?

1. It guides us v. 3
2. It makes a difference in death v. 4
   1. A good conscience makes the end of ones life easier
3. It leads us to righteousness
4. It counsels us
5. It makes us gracious
6. It makes us generous
7. It brings life v. 30
8. It bypasses judgment v. 32

How do you get it?

1. You train it
   1. Proverbs 20:11
      1. A child either has it or doesn’t
   2. Verse 5
      1. When they get it and mature - it directs their way
      2. Perfect = complete or mature or whole
2. You pursue it
   1. We often have opportunity to pursue integrity . . .
3. You live it
   1. It shows up in how we treat people
   2. In how we run our business

Part 4

Solomon is writing about how to pursue happiness and success- especially in our families

How do we get there?

1. We must emphasize God’s blessings v. 22
   1. We should believe in God’s blessings
      1. v. 25 HE gives an everlasting foundation
      2. v. 27 He prolongs days
      3. v. 28. He gives gladness
      4. V. 29 His way gives strength
      5. 28:20 a faithful man shall abound with blessings
      6. Psalm 107:38
      7. Genesis 12:2; 13:2; 24:35
   2. We should desire God’s blessings
      1. Sometimes they are material/physical
         1. Deuteronomy 8:17-18
         2. We work for these (and save and pray)
         3. We give thanks for these
      2. Sometimes they are spiritual
         1. Love joy and peace
         2. Contentment
         3. Favor
      3. Sometimes they are relational
         1. A good friend
         2. A good spouse
            1. He that findeth a wife, findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favor from the Lord
         3. Children
            1. Lo, children are a heritage of the Lord and the fruit of the womb is His reward
         4. In-laws
            1. A good spouse for your children
            2. A family connection that results
               1. Adams, Mundays, Pisneys, and soon to be Gentiles
               2. Bethlie’s parents to me and my parents to her

Questions:

1. How do we balance the idea of God’s blessings and the issue of “bad things” that happen?
2. How do we teach this to our children?
3. Is it ok to think of God’s blessings as material? How do we balance this with the idea that the best ones are not?