• ShouldStorm - Culture of perfectionism and criticism
• We as parents want to do what is best for our kids, but we are bombarded by everyone telling us what we should and should not do.
• Finding the “right” answer.
• Defining “expert”
• How the ShouldStorm impacts our kids
• We like to blame social media, but it really comes from what we talk about in our communities.
• What matters is not the college but the student.
• If you play someone else’s game, you will always lose, if you’re playing your own game, you can’t lose.
• Sigh, See, Start: transitions you from the anxiety of the ShouldStorm, to connection with your kids.
• The sigh is a built-in mechanism in our bodies, breathe out long and slow - sends a message to our body that we are OK.
• Vagus nerve turns on prefrontal cortex.
• See - moment of mindfulness - see your child. Noticing, not doing.
• Start - run an experiment about how to help the situation.
• Built on a faith that is scientifically grounded, you (and your kids) are more capable than you think (and than the world will tell you are).
• Emphasizing repair

Alison Escalante, M.D., is a pediatrician, speaker, and author of Sigh, See, Start: How to Be the Parent Your Child Needs in a World That Won’t Stop Pushing. In a perfectionistic parenting culture that tells you that you are never enough no matter how much you do for your kids, this unique approach empowers you with a simple parenting technique to gain confidence, remain grounded, and connect positively with your children.