Parenting Adults

Dealing with boundaries, finances, and changing values are all part of parenting your grown child. In Doing Life with Your Adult Children, Jim Burns offers practical advice and hopeful encouragement for one of the richest and most challenging seasons of parenting.

No matter how old your child is, you’ll always be their parent. Discover how you can sustain your relationship even when you’re no longer under the same roof.

The difficulties experienced by adult children of narcissists can manifest themselves in many ways - for example, physical self-loathing that takes the form of overeating, anorexia, or bulimia; a self-destructive streak that causes poor job performance and rocky personal relationships; or a struggle with the self that is perpetuated in the adult's interaction with his or her own children. These dilemmas are both common and correctable, Elan Golomb tells us.

In a time when so many children and young adults seem to be struggling, parents are looking for help in bringing up mentally healthy kids who are equipped to thrive. Finally, evidence-based help is now available for overwhelmed parents who are trying their best but feel like they’re falling short.

More than 10 years after Parenting Your Adult Child was published, much has changed—including young adults themselves, as well as their parents. Economic upheavals, challenges to traditional values and beliefs, the phenomenon of over-involved "helicopter parenting"—all make relating to grown children more difficult than ever. Yet at the same time, being a parent of an adult child can bring great rewards.

Your child is now an adult, but your job as a parent is far from over. Instead, your role must evolve to meet their ongoing, changing needs. But what exactly are these new needs? And why are they so different now than they were when you were a young adult? Psychologist Laurence Steinberg has devoted his forty-five-year career to researching parent-child relationships. Here, he provides some basic principles to help parents with adult children think more intelligently about common issues, avoid minefields, weather the inevitable ups and downs, and create a stronger bond with their child.

Those who have had a narcissistic parent can testify to how damaging it can be to one's psyche. Narcissistic parents lack empathy, show a severe sense of entitlement to micromanage the lives of their children, and often subject their children to neglect, as well as emotional, psychological, and physical abuse. From the unique challenges daughters of narcissistic fathers face to the ways in which adverse childhood experiences affect our brains, Shahida Arabi's insightful essays resonate deeply with those who have been raised by narcissistic parents.

Parents whose adult children have cut off contact wonder: How did this happen? Where did I go wrong? What happened to my loving child? Over time, holidays, birthdays, and even the birth of grandchildren may pass in silence. Anguish may turn into anger. While time, in and of itself, does not necessarily heal, actions do, and while every estrangement includes situation-specific variables, there are practical, effective, and universal techniques for understanding and healing these not-uncommon breaches.

As a parent, your role changes drastically after your kids grow up. You fear heartache and strained relationships when your children choose difficult—even seemingly wrong—paths. Love, Pray, Listen is the gracious, practical resource you need for navigating the rocky terrain of parenting grown-ups. Mary DeMuth offers a robust theology for long-term parenting gleaned from the discipleship model Jesus exemplified, one carefully applying his way of expressing love. This is your invitation for spiritual growth and a path toward fulfilling relationships with your adult children.

We raise our children to be independent and lead fulfilling lives, but when they finally do, staying close becomes more complicated than ever. And for every bewildered mother who wonders why her children don't call, there is a frustrated son or daughter who just wants to be treated like a grownup. Now, renowned editor Jane Isay delivers the perfect gift to both parents and their adult children-real-life wisdom and advice on how to stay together without falling apart.

A tough-love guide to coping with dysfunctional adult children, Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children will empower families by offering hope and healing through S.A.N.I.T.Y. - a six-step program to help parents regain control in their homes and in their lives.

We're all a product of our childhood, and if you're like most people, you have experienced some form of childhood trauma. Adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) are at the root of nearly all mental health disorders. Memories associated with ACEs imprint on a child's brain, and can manifest themselves mentally and physically throughout adulthood. So, how can you begin healing the deep wounds of ACEs and build strength and resilience? In this innovative workbook, trauma specialist Glenn Schiraldi presents practical, evidence-based skills to help you heal from ACEs.

In this breakthrough book, clinical psychologist Lindsay Gibson exposes the destructive nature of parents who are emotionally immature or unavailable. You will see how these parents create a sense of neglect and discover ways to heal from the pain and confusion caused by your childhood. By freeing yourself from your parents' emotional immaturity, you can recover your true nature, control how you react to them, and avoid disappointment. Finally, you'll learn how to create positive new relationships so you can build a better life.

Behind nearly every adult who is accused of a crime, becomes addicted to drugs or alcohol, or who is severely mentally ill and acting out in public, there is usually at least one extremely stressed-out parent. This parent may initially react with the bad news of their adult child behaving badly with, "Oh no!" followed by, "How can I help to fix this?" A very common third reaction is the thought, "Where did I go wrong - was it something I said or did, or that I failed to do when my child was growing up that caused these issues? Is this really somehow all my fault?"

Through historical newspaper accounts and the personal letters of soldiers, the events leading up to the battle and the battle itself are stunningly recreated. You will enter the mind of Robert E. Lee as he makes the fateful decision to cross the Potomac River and take the offensive. You will feel the frustration of Abraham Lincoln as he struggles to convince George McClellan to fight. And you will stand side-by-side with foot soldiers as the peaceful Maryland countryside explodes.

There's a new set of 3Rs for our kids - respect, responsibility, and resilience - to better prepare them for life in the real world. Once developed, these skills let kids take charge, and let parents step back, to the benefit of all. Casting hover mothers and helicopter parents aside, Vicki Hoefle encourages a different, counterintuitive, yet much more effective, approach to parenting: for parents to sit on their hands, stay on the sidelines - even if duct tape is required!

Witty and straight-shooting, Duct Tape Parenting entertains as it informs parents how to do less in order to raise more confident, capable children.

For the millions of adults diagnosed with ADHD, The Disorganized Mind will provide expert guidance on what they can do to make the most of their lives. The inattention, time mismanagement, procrastination, impulsivity, distractibility, and difficulty with transitions that often go hand-in-hand with ADHD can be overcome with the unique approach that Nancy Ratey brings to turning these behaviors around.

In Done with the Crying: Help and Healing for Mothers of Estranged Adult Children, Sheri McGregor, MA, helps parents break free from emotional pain - and move forward in their own lives. As a loving mother to whom the unthinkable happened, McGregor knows the horrible shock that wrings a parent dry, triggers denial, blame, anger, and shame. With empathy and understanding, as well as tools, the latest research, and insight from more than 9,000 parents of estranged adult children, McGregor helps parents of estranged adults plan, prepare for emotional triggers, and prevail over pain.

Few of us are immune to the ideas we absorbed as children. We learned how to get approval or disapproval by creating the kinds of selves who would fit in and succeed with the "right" jobs, relationships, possessions, and so on. Even if we rebel against these ingrained notions by going in the opposite direction, we are still controlled by them. Either way, as adults we are often left feeling anxious or depressed because who we really are has been ignored.

Although relatively common, borderline personality disorder (BPD) is often overlooked or misdiagnosed by therapists and clinicians and denied by those who suffer from it. If you were raised by a BPD parent, your childhood was a volatile and painful time. This book, the first written specifically for children of borderline parents, offers step-by-step guidance to understanding and overcoming the lasting effects of being raised by a person suffering from this disorder.