Plain Bad Heroines
A Novel
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Narrated by:
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Xe Sands
About this listen
“Full of Victorian sapphic romance, metafictional horror, biting misandrist humor, Hollywood intrigue, and multiple timeliness - all replete with evocative illustrations that are icing on a deviously delicious cake.” (O, The Oprah Magazine)
“Brimming from start to finish with sly humor and gothic mischief. Brilliant.” (Sarah Waters)
Named a Most Anticipated Book by:
- O, The Oprah Magazine
- Buzzfeed
- Harper's Bazaar
- Vulture
- Parade
- Popsugar
- Bustle
- Goodreads
- Autostraddle
- Literary Hub
- And more!
The award-winning author of The Miseducation of Cameron Post makes her adult debut with this highly imaginative and original horror-comedy centered around a cursed New England boarding school for girls - a wickedly whimsical celebration of the art of storytelling, sapphic love, and the rebellious female spirit.
Our story begins in 1902, at the Brookhants School for Girls. Flo and Clara, two impressionable students, are obsessed with each other and with a daring young writer named Mary MacLane, the author of a scandalous best-selling memoir. To show their devotion to Mary, the girls establish their own private club and call it the Plain Bad Heroine Society. They meet in secret in a nearby apple orchard, the setting of their wildest happiness and, ultimately, of their macabre deaths.
This is where their bodies are later discovered with a copy of Mary’s book splayed beside them, the victims of a swarm of stinging, angry yellow jackets. Less than five years later, the Brookhants School for Girls closes its doors forever - but not before three more people mysteriously die on the property, each in a most troubling way.
More than a century later, the now-abandoned and crumbling Brookhants is back in the news when wunderkind writer Merritt Emmons publishes a breakout book celebrating the queer, feminist history surrounding the “haunted and cursed” Gilded Age institution. Her best-selling book inspires a controversial horror film adaptation starring celebrity actor and lesbian it girl Harper Harper playing the ill-fated heroine Flo, opposite B-list actress and former child star Audrey Wells as Clara. But as Brookhants opens its gates once again, and our three modern heroines arrive on set to begin filming, past and present become grimly entangled - or perhaps just grimly exploited - and soon it’s impossible to tell where the curse leaves off and Hollywood begins.
A story within a story within a story, Plain Bad Heroines is a devilishly haunting, modern masterwork of metafiction that manages to combine the ghostly sensibility of Sarah Waters with the dark imagination of Marisha Pessl and the sharp humor and incisive social commentary of Curtis Sittenfeld into one laugh-out-loud funny, spellbinding, and wonderfully luxuriant listen.
Supplemental enhancement PDF accompanies the audiobook.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2020 Emily M. Danforth (P)2020 HarperCollins PublishersListeners also enjoyed...
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When the corporate monolith PortSys brought porting to the masses, CEO Emilia Kirsch and her son, Jason, accomplished what every other start-up company had failed to deliver. They really did change the world. They reversed climate change. They created a multitrillion-dollar industry out of thin air, curing economic woes across the globe. They made it so that anyone could be anywhere simply by touching a screen...including the man who murdered Sarah Huff. Now, Sarah’s 17-year-old sister, Anna, is determined to hunt the bastard down. But there are a few problems.
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Sherry Potter’s only got one spell: portkey
- By aaron gilbert on 11-02-20
By: Drew Magary
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The Miseducation of Cameron Post
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Cameron Post feels a mix of guilt and relief when her parents die in a car accident. Their deaths mean they will never learn the truth she eventually comes to - that she's gay. Orphaned, Cameron comes to live with her old-fashioned grandmother and ultraconservative aunt Ruth. When she’s eventually outed, her aunt sends her to God’s Promise, a religious conversion camp that is supposed to “cure” her homosexuality. At the camp, Cameron comes face to face with the cost of denying her true identity.
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A very worthwhile Read!
- By Anonymous User on 11-02-14
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Jack: Secret Histories
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Performance
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Ever come across a situation that simply wasn't right - where someone was getting the dirty end of the stick and you wished you could make things right but didn't know how? Fourteen-year-old Jack knows how. Or rather he's learning how. He's discovering that he has a knack for fixing things. Not bikes or toys or appliances - situations...It all starts when Jack and his best friends, Weezy and Eddie, discover a rotting corpse - the victim of ritual murder - in the fabled New Jersey Pine Barrens. Beside the body is an ancient artifact carved with strange designs.
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The Lost Causes of Bleak Creek
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At first, high school freshmen Rex McClendon and Leif Nelson believe what they’ve been told - that local students’ strange demises at Whitewood, a local reformatory, were all tragic accidents. But when the shoot for their low-budget horror masterpiece, PolterDog, goes horribly awry - and their best friend, Alicia Boykins, is sent to Whitewood - Rex and Leif are forced to question everything they know about their unassuming hometown and its cherished school for delinquents.
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Does it hold up beyond the R&L fandom?
- By Anonymous User on 12-01-19
By: Rhett McLaughlin, and others
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Tell Me Everything
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In her first weeks at Hawthorne College, Malin is swept up into a tight-knit circle that will stick together through all four years. There’s Gemma, an insecure theater major from London; John, a tall, handsome, wealthy New Englander; Max, John’s cousin, a shy pre-med major; Khaled, a wisecracking prince from Abu Dhabi; and Ruby, a beautiful art history major. But Malin isn’t like the rest of her friends. She’s an expert at hiding her troubled past - all while using her extraordinary insight to detect their deepest vulnerabilities and weaknesses.
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beware
- By Anonymous User on 10-03-19
By: Cambria Brockman
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The Bitter and Sweet of Cherry Season
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Everything Hope knows about the Orchard House is from the stories of her late mother. So when she arrives at the northern Michigan family estate late one night with a terrible secret and her 10-year-old daughter in tow, she’s not sure if she’ll be welcomed or turned away with a shotgun by the aunt she has never met.
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Really Enjoyed It
- By Kathryn @theBookDate on 03-30-21
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Magic Hour
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In the rugged Pacific Northwest lies the Olympic National Forest - nearly a million acres of impenetrable darkness and impossible beauty. From deep within this old growth forest, a six-year-old girl appears. Speechless and alone, she offers no clue as to her identity, no hint of her past.
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Horrible narration
- By Howard Egan on 12-27-20
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The First Husband
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Annie Adams is days away from her 32nd birthday and thinks she has finally found some happiness. She visits the world's most interesting places for her syndicated travel column and she's happily cohabiting with her movie director boyfriend Nick in Los Angeles. But when Nick comes home from a meeting with his therapist (aka "futures counselor") and announces that he's taking a break from their relationship so he can pursue a woman from his past, the place Annie had come to call home is shattered.
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Meh
- By Anonymous User on 05-16-21
By: Laura Dave
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Gave me PTSD from studying the classics
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In 1933, nine-year-old Stella is left in the care of her grandmother, Motty, in the backwoods of Tennessee. The mountains are home to dangerous secrets, and soon after she arrives, Stella wanders into a dark cavern where she encounters the family's personal god, an entity known as the Ghostdaddy. Years later, after a tragic incident that caused her to flee, Stella - now a professional bootlegger - returns for Motty's funeral, and to check on the mysterious 10-year-old girl named Sunny that Motty adopted.
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Beth and Fran spend their days traveling the ravaged New England coast, hunting feral men and harvesting their organs in a gruesome effort to ensure they'll never face the same fate. Robbie lives by his gun and one hard-learned motto: other people aren't safe. After a brutal accident entwines the three of them, this found family of survivors must navigate murderous TERFs, a sociopathic billionaire bunker brat, and awkward relationship dynamics—all while outrunning packs of feral men, and their own demons.
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Pay no attention to the cover art
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At the dawn of their adolescence, on the eve of the summer solstice, four young girls—Helena, Leonie, Niamh and Elle—took the oath to join Her Majesty's Royal Coven, established by Queen Elizabeth I as a covert government department. Now, decades later, the witch community is still reeling from a civil war and Helena is the reigning High Priestess of the organization. Yet Helena is the only one of her friend group still enmeshed in the stale bureaucracy of HMRC.
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It’s Fine…
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It's 1895, and after the suicide of her mother, 16-year-old Gemma Doyle is shipped off from the life she knows in India to Spence, a proper boarding school in England. Lonely, guilt-ridden, and prone to visions of the future that have an uncomfortable habit of coming true, Gemma's reception there is a chilly one.
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More Details, please!
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Andrew and Eddie did everything together, best friends bonded more deeply than brothers, until Eddie left Andrew behind to start his graduate program at Vanderbilt. Six months later, only days before Andrew was to join him in Nashville, Eddie dies of an apparent suicide. He leaves Andrew a horrible inheritance: a roommate he doesn’t know, friends he never asked for, and a gruesome phantom that hungers for him.
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A surprise of the best variety!
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A Feather So Black
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In a kingdom where magic has been lost, Fia is a rare changeling, left behind by the wicked Fair Folk when they stole the High Queen's daughter and retreated behind the locked gates of Tír na nÓg. Most despise Fia's fae blood. But the queen raises her as a daughter and trains her to be a spy. Meanwhile, the real princess Eala is bound to Tír na nÓg, cursed to become a swan by day and only returning to her true form at night. When a hidden gate to the realm is discovered, Fia is tasked by the queen to retrieve the princess and break her curse.
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Weak character
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What listeners say about Plain Bad Heroines
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Anonymous User
- 12-14-20
This book took a long time to get nowhere
I enjoyed the ride, but the end was kind of a let down. Not enough explained for the story build up. The narrator was good, but a little too tongue in cheek even for the story. None of the characters were particularly likable. I can’t think of a better way to say this - it is a VERY millennial book. You’ll see what I mean.
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8 people found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 09-11-21
Enchanted
Brugmansia arborea, a bit of witchcraft, shifting timelines and beautiful, complicated female characters.
What’s not to like?
Loved it…
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- Laura Howell
- 01-22-24
surprisingly good
the narrator took some getting used to, she seemed a bit monotone at times and the characters as a result sounded very similar and oftentimes made it difficult to differentiate. that's the only complaint, she's really good otherwise! the book was fantastic, and always kept me on my toes. will read again.
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- Anonymous User
- 01-31-24
what Rebecca should have been
great story, engaging and at times unsettling! would love to find more books just like this.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 09-07-21
Whoa
That was excellent. And Xe Sands' narration...superb. Love the weaving of storylines, the characters, and the pace. It's a slow burn, a story to drink in and savor, sip by sip.
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- Anonymous User
- 04-06-21
I loved the narrator
I loved the narrator's voice. she really made it come to life. I liked that there were so many different character backgrounds included. It really let me get invested in the story and want to know more. Also it is nice to hear a story with many queer ladies both in the past and present represented, as well as other queer people.
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- Anonymous User
- 01-20-23
Wonderful narration
Wonderful narration with a compelling plot and characters. I would definitely recommend this title to you.
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- Anonymous User
- 08-09-21
Pleasantly surprised by this book...
I must say that I was pleasantly surprised by this book. I got it because I LOVE anything and everything Xe Sands does. Then realized that a Lesbian horror story was really great!
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- Anonymous User
- 04-18-22
Slow burn, engaging listen, very queer
The dual timelines, entrenched queerness, and slow burn of the spooky all made for an engaging listen. I'm still chewing on the story as a whole and whether it was actually satisfying for me.
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- Anonymous User
- 08-05-22
Such a great book! Highly recommend!
I wasn’t expecting much, but this was one of the best fiction books I’ve read in a while. I love how much it weaves in history and I hope someone makes a film out of this very meta story one day. It’s great to read in a ladies book club ;)
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