Tell Me What You Want

By: Justin J. Lehmiller

Narrated by: Justin J. Lehmiller

A leading expert on human sexuality and author of the blog Sex and Psychology offers an unprecedented look at sexual fantasy based on the most comprehensive, scientific survey ever undertaken.

What do Americans really want when it comes to sex? And is it possible for us to get what we want? Justin J. Lehmiller, one of the country's leading experts on human sexuality and author of the popular blog Sex and Psychology, has made it his career's ambition to answer these questions. He recently concluded the largest and most comprehensive scientific survey of Americans' sexual fantasies ever undertaken, a monumental two-year study involving more than 4,000 Americans from all walks of life, answering questions of unusual scope.

Based on this study, Tell Me What You Want offers an unprecedented look into our fantasy worlds and what they reveal about us. It helps readers to better understand their own sexual desires and how to attain them within their relationships, but also to appreciate why the desires of their partners may be so incredibly different.

If we only better understood the incredible diversity of human sexual desire and why this diversity exists in the first place, we would experience less distress, anxiety, and shame about our own sexual fantasies and better understand why our partners often have sexual proclivities that are so different from our own. Ultimately, this book will help readers to enhance their sex lives and to maintain more satisfying relationships and marriages in the future by breaking down barriers to discussing sexual fantasies and allowing them to become a part of readers' sexual realities.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2018 Justin J. Lehmiller (P)2018 Hachette Audio

Critic reviews

"Lehmiller's smart, warm, sex-positive book breaks the toxic silence around our sexual fantasies. Reading it may be the best thing you ever do for your sex life, your relationships and your self-acceptance." (Geoffrey Miller, author of The Mating Mind, Spent, and Mate)

"Lehmiller's groundbreaking book points to an alarming divide between the conversations we're having about sex and the conversation we should be having about sex. It provides the nudge we need to change the conversation - and, in doing so, to live healthier, hotter lives." (Eli J. Finkel, professor of psychology, Northwestern University)

"A penetrating, erotic X-ray into the hidden recesses of our sexual psyches. Illuminating and incisive, Lehmiller lays bare the gray matter of great sex." (Ian Kerner, PhD, New York Times best-selling author of She Comes First)

Insightful and entertaining!

I heard of this work through a podcast and immediately picked up the audiobook. Wow! It did not disappoint. I listened to it all in one sitting. The author does a fantastic job of describing the research methodology and expertly breaks down the results in an entertaining way.

This book helped me understand my own fantasies and provided insight into the fantasies of my partner. I cannot recommend highly enough! If you only have one credit, use it on this book!

Informative

Extremely informative and helpful. Knowing sexual fantasies are normal and most everyone has them. Great information. Highly recommend

This book is life-changing

This book is an amazing scientific approach about the truth behind sexual desire. The author goes into detail about anything and everything you could ever want to know about what people desire sexually, why they desire it, and what to do about your own desires. This book will help you understand yourself, your partner(s), and American culture with regards to sexual desire. I recommend it to anyone who is open to learning about statistically common sexual fantasies and their implications on relationships. Overall, this author keeps the story very scientific and factual, being sure to address the possible shortcomings of his study, which adds significantly to his credibility as a researcher.

Wow, I am full

This book was so informative and exhausting if ingested in one sitting. You really dive into the minds of those around us. I will be reading again for better understanding, all in all a beautiful piece.

Interesting.

I actually downloaded this thinking that I'd learn about the importance of communicating desires and/or something along those lines. I did, in a roundabout way. Groovy book regardless.

Clear and scientific read

Enjoyed it. The author presented the topic in a clear and scientifically way, free of judgement and full of encouragement.

love the book, but I can't find the pdf?

maybe I'm not sure where to exactly look, but is the pdf still available at this time who purchases the book?

Educational, informative fact based book!

Surprisingly insightful and educational. I didn't expect it to be based on science and research which definitely increases the validity and trust of what's being presented. Strongly recommend and will be sharing with my fiance to read!

Enlightening

After having struggled with understanding, accepting & suppressing my fantasies for years, I gave this book a listen based on a recommended. Turns out, the fantasies I’ve had for so long are normal & fairly common amongst many men & women. Suppressing these fantasies for so long has resulted in immense anxiety, depression & increased marital issues for me. Chapters 8 thru the end of the book went a long way in helping me better understand the role my sexual fantasies have played in all these aspects. It’s given me more confidence & somewhat of a roadmap for sharing with my wife of 20+ years. If you have had fears of sharing your intimate desires with your spouse, I highly recommend at least listening to or reading the last couple chapters at least.
Thanks to the author for putting this book together!

If you only read one book on sex, read this one.

So informative and yet it felt light and easy to digest. Also Justin has a great voice.