A Well-Trained Wife

My Escape from Christian Patriarchy

De: Tia Levings

Narrado por: Tia Levings

Duración: 10 h y 54 m

Resumen del Editor

This program is read by the author.

“Today it hit me when he hit me, blood shaking in my brain. Maybe there wasn’t a savior coming. Maybe it was up to me to save me.”

Recruited into the fundamentalist Quiverfull movement as a young wife, Tia Levings learned that being a good Christian meant following a list of additional life principles—a series of secret, special rules to obey. Being a godly and submissive wife in Christian Patriarchy included strict discipline, isolation, and an alternative lifestyle that appeared wholesome to outsiders. Women were to be silent, “keepers of the home.”

Tia knew that to their neighbors her family was strange, but she also couldn't risk exposing their secret lifestyle to police, doctors, teachers, or anyone outside of their church. Christians were called in scripture to be “in the world, not of it.” So, she hid in plain sight as years of abuse and pain followed. When Tia realized she was the only one who could protect her children from becoming the next generation of patriarchal men and submissive women, she began to resist and question how they lived. But in the patriarchy, a woman with opinions is in danger, and eventually, Tia faced an urgent and extreme choice: stay and face dire consequences, or flee with her children.

Told in a beautiful, honest, and sometimes harrowing voice, A Well-Trained Wife is an unforgettable and timely memoir about a woman's race to save herself and her family and details the ways that extreme views can manifest in a marriage.

A Macmillan Audio production from St. Martin’s Press.

©2024 Tia Levings (P)2024 Macmillan Audio

Reseñas de la Crítica

“In this brave memoir on domestic violence within Christian patriarchy, Tia Levings vulnerably shares her story of survival. With devastating detail, she reveals the many shades of abuse that happen within the world of evangelicalism, a world that was supposed to protect her. The many women who have walked this path from oppression to freedom will find solidarity in these pages.”—Cait West, author of Rift

"I've never given a book a standing ovation until this one. A Well-Trained Wife is a prayer, for all of us. The world is lucky Tia Levings found her freedom and her voice. A reckoning for those who sanction abuse in the name of salvation."—Ashleigh Renard, author of Swing

"With unflinching honesty and relentless self-reflection, Levings’ debut memoir is a portrait in courage."—Julie Bogart, author of The Brave Learner and Raising Critical Thinkers

A lot of triggers

This well written account of Tias escape from Christian patriarchy brought a TON OF feelings back. I escaped 24 years ago. With no one to talk to. Alone. I buried myself in music and life and work. 24 years later I find this book and I sit here with tears streaming down my face. I'm facing the trauma and abuse from 24 years ago and this account brings a lot back. I can relate more than you know. I love that you have written this down. I have been told that I should. But I am not a gifted writer. Still I would love to help others as you are. I will read this again. And again. Next time I will read a hard copy and write notes.
Again, thank you. Xoxo

Brave and necessary

I have followed Levings on social media for years and have been waiting for this book, finished it all in one day! It is only when people are able to throw off the shame of living with abuse under fundamental Christian patriarchy and tell their stories that we will be able to do something about this pervasive problem deeply entrenched in American culture. Levings writes with such honesty, but also such beauty. Her talent as a descriptive writer is on par with some of the best contemporary novelist I have ever read, and I have no doubt if this will only be the first masterpiece we see from her.

A courageous cautionary tale

Thank you, Tia Levings, for sharing your story and giving us another glimpse into the dark, rotten core of Fundie Christianity.

An Excellent must read

This is a book with the story that is simultaneously familiar and unique. It is Jeremy of Self discovery forgiveness and very relevant to the world as a whole.

Witness her healing journey

I have followed Tia for a while and love her videos. I’d been looking forward to her book for a long time and made sure to preorder it! It did not disappoint! Tia’s writing is vibrant and raw. This touching memoir could not be released at a better time than the run-up to the 2025 election! Tia elucidates what the religious right intends to force on everyone because she has lived it.

Vulnerability Personified

Such an honest inside account of religious control. It is remarkable that Tia broke free with her life and mental sanity. There were still some unanswered questions for me regarding her parents, children and ex husband. But overall, a well written glimpse into a living hell that was “in the name of God”.

Wrenching and riveting

Strangely familiar. I grew up gothard. Intriguing and engaging. One more step stone of healing for my fragile trauma brain

A review from a chronic non-reviewer

Despite listening to around three audiobooks a month, I rarely leave reviews. Tia’s book was so exceptional that I felt it would be a disservice to her potential readers not to leave one.

Tia’s book is a heart-wrenching personal exploration of the abuse and silencing that occurs in the fundamentalism movement that has been gaining ground in the United States. Beginning with her childhood, Tia unpacks and explores how her sense of self and worth were chipped away at and placed her in the vulnerable position of believing her only worth as a woman was through being a dutiful, god-fearing wife.

As she detailed her marriage and the numerous abuses and losses she survived, my heart broke for her and for the other women in my family and life who have been trapped. Her descriptions, though not gratuitous, are detailed and may be triggering for those of us who have witnessed and experienced IPV, so be mindful of that. That being said, I never felt that the details were excessive or unnecessary to the unfolding narrative.

Another area where Tia excelled was in the sections and moments where she interwove the broader fundamentalism into her individual experience, highlighting that her story is not an isolated “flaw” but an intentional design of the system. This smooth oscillation between the micro and macro demonstrates not only Tia’s skill as a writer but her profound journey and healing from fundamentalist teachings. In this way, Tia has surpassed other novels of deconstruction that have emerged in the past several years. Stories like hers hurt to write and read, and I hope to read more from her in the future.

So impressed, moved and proud

I’ve followed Tia on social media for quite a while and have been eagerly awaiting this book release…and what a triumph it is! Always rich, evocative and raw, I smiled/wept every time she mentioned one of the writers who helped light my own path to freedom (David Richo, Mary Oliver, Liz Gilbert, etc.). We can all add the name Tia Levings to this list, in hopes that our friends, mothers, daughters, sisters, cousins will reclaim their true Self and voice too. Brava, beautiful! Thank you for shining your light.

Powerful. Moving.

Wow. Amazing story that felt relatable and cathartic for me! Tia Levings has written a timely retelling of her experience not only within the stifling confines of some religious societies but also her struggles with loving someone who is profoundly wounded. Unexpectedly powerful for me and a story I will not soon forget.