How Now, Butterfly?

A Memoir of Murder, Survival, and Transformation

By: Charity Lee, Brian Whitney

Narrated by: Larissa Peterson

Losing a young daughter to murder is the worst nightmare that a mother could possibly imagine, but what if the killer was her son? Charity Lee was thrust into this unimaginable situation when her 13-year-old son, Paris, murdered her beloved four-year-old daughter, Ella.

Charity goes through intense grief at the loss of her daughter, while at the same time trying to understand why her son would have done something as horrific as this, and how she could have missed the signs that Paris was a true psychopath.

While barely holding herself together throughout her intense grief, Charity is still a mother and feels a need to advocate for her son to receive appropriate treatment while incarcerated, while at the same time trying to ensure he stays in prison so he can never hurt someone again. Charity still loves her son and craves a connection with him despite all he has done. Because of her experiences, she rebuilds her life and starts a non-profit to help other families of victims, as well as offenders.

This book is a meditation on grief, loss, and forgiveness unlike any other. It's also an inspirational story of a true survivor. Well-written and haunting How Now, Butterfly? is a book that no listener will soon forget.

©2020 Charity Lee (P)2020 WildBlue Press

Brutal honesty!

I felt that the honesty on here was refreshing. No sugar coating here. I feel for what this mother has gone through and I can understand how hard it is to have unconditional love for a child that has done harm. As I am a mother of 4 children. With that being said. I was really engaged through the whole book and, thought it was well written.

Amazing!

I couldn't stop listening to this book from beginning to end. Absolutely inspiring! My heart aches for Charity!

Amazing, heartbreaking, and impossible to put down

How could a Mother come to terms with grieving the loss of her young daughters life while also grieving the loss of young sons life.. her daughters murderer. Only a Mother that has had to come to those terms can answer that. Charity exposes raw emotions and truths as she tries to make sense of why her son murdered his sister. You can feel her every emotion deep in your being. The questions that have no real answers, only why? The heartbreak is enormous as she discusses Bella's death and how she had to cope to get herself through it... wondering if she is betraying Bella if she continues to love and support Paris. The internal conflict she battled and overcame in her efforts to heal, transform and go on to help other people is simply amazing. She advocates for her sons mental health and has maintained support and a relationship with him despite knowing what he has done was mean't to hurt her. She speaks openly of her fear of Paris now and forever. Charity also now has a beautiful son she named Phoenix. She also talks openly about Paris' relationship with him. A woman, a daughter and a Mother who shows exceptional courage and faith during the most horrific event of her life. Purple Butterflies.. fly free and in peace sweet baby! Thank you for sharing your journey Charity.. you are a true inspiration!

A Heartbreaking But Important Listen

I know a lot of people don’t care for this book because of the style it’s written in (Charity’s journal entries) but I did not mind that at all. This is her raw emotions/thoughts written in a private journal and shared with us. This was overwhelming at some points and I had to take breaks. She’s sharing her life journey and trying to help others and I think it’s amazing. Rest In Peace Ella. 🕊️

no mother should have to go through this

very well written book, the pain she has to go through is unspeakable I would say this is a must read/hear