In this episode of the Parent Companion for Play Therapy series, I introduce a visual way to understand your child's behavior before and after child-centered play therapy — what I call The Wave Model: From Tsunami to Tide. Before children develop the skills to regulate, communicate, and make sense of their emotions, their behavior often shows up in extremes. The highs are very high, the lows are very low, and everything feels intense, overwhelming, and difficult to manage.

As children build emotional vocabulary, regulation, self-esteem, and a broader understanding of their world, those extremes begin to settle. The waves don't disappear, but they become calmer, more predictable, and easier to recover from. Instead of sharp spikes, behavior begins to look more like gentle, steady waves. The goal isn't to eliminate emotion, but to move from overwhelming intensity to manageable experiences — from tsunami-level reactions to a more balanced, regulated tide.

Ask Me Questions: Call ‪(813) 812-5525‬, or email: brenna@thekidcounselor.com
My Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids - https://a.co/d/bThnKH9
Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/
My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/
My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/

Common References:
Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge.
Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I explain the concept of the pendulum swing and why it is such an important picture for understanding what happens in child-centered play therapy. When children have felt powerless in everyday life, the permissive playroom gives them a chance to experience the opposite. They are allowed to take charge, make decisions, and even swing all the way into dictatorial power. That can look extreme, but it is actually part of the healing process. Children are testing what power feels like because they have spent so much of life feeling like they had none.

Over time, they discover that neither extreme feels good. Having no power feels awful, but having all the power feels awful too. Through the freedom of the playroom and the safety of the therapeutic relationship, children learn that balance is what actually feels right. This is how regulation develops. They move from black-and-white extremes toward a healthy middle, and that process helps parents understand why children may seem to "ping pong" for a while before they settle.

Ask Me Questions: Call ‪(813) 812-5525‬, or email: brenna@thekidcounselor.com
My Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids - https://a.co/d/bThnKH9
Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/
My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/
My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/

Common References:
Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge.
Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.

In this episode, I explain the concept of the anger iceberg and how it completely changes the way we understand our children's behavior. What we see on the surface—yelling, hitting, defiance, aggression—is often just a small piece of what's actually going on. Underneath that anger is something much bigger: hurt, disappointment, fear, frustration, or overwhelm. Kids don't choose anger because it's accurate—they choose it because it feels powerful and helps them avoid vulnerability.

When we only react to the anger, we miss what our child is really trying to communicate. But when we pause and look beneath the surface, we can respond to the true emotion instead of the behavior. This shift helps our children feel seen and understood, which is what actually reduces the outbursts over time. My goal in this episode is to help you see past the behavior so you can connect with what your child is really experiencing—and respond in a way that helps, not escalates.

Ask Me Questions: Call ‪(813) 812-5525‬, or email: brenna@thekidcounselor.com
My Book: Device Detox: A Parent's Guide To Reducing Usage, Preventing Tantrums, And Raising Happier Kids - https://a.co/d/bThnKH9
Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/
My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/
My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/

Common References:
Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge.
Landreth, G.L., & Bratton, S.C. (2019). Child-Parent Relationship Therapy (CPRT): An Evidence-Based 10-Session Filial Therapy Model (2nd ed.). Routledge.