🔸 Gambling; the game of life.

🎓 What I'd like to do differently:

It's been about a year since we talked, and the only intention we set was to chat, not do IFS. So I took this call while walking, and didn't prep much.

Presenting with what he called his most significant trauma, at beginning of call I was wanting to offer detours, not make the mistake of going too fast. But I'm not confident when I'm just one foot in IFS, and I don't think I was being particularly skillful or helpful.

When an old pal reaches out and says "my mom died", even if our intention was to do IFS, it doesn't feel right to respond with "How about a minute of meditation? Got any parts...?"

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🔸 We don’t live there anymore
2️⃣ Left out of the family picture

🔹 Parts:

• P: get it perfect or you’ll disappear. tired, wishes someone else was In charge. Works so hard for chance to rest.
• P: it’s too dangerous to look inside: “Are you crazy? He’ll kill us all”, story has been told, not felt. wants death certificates
• E: waiting to be seen, in so much pain
• P: healing is a battle

2️⃣

• P: the judge. “she’s a coward” Not being willing to hear the truth. crazy about clean, searching for weak spot. Angry. You’re missing life by not expressing yourself. You’re giving up on relationships. Thinks I'm 13
• E: on the outside. “You’re not family, you don’t belong in this kind of picture” Judge keeps telling me I have to ask questions. Wants me to talk to the judge

🎓 What I'd like to do differently:

2️⃣ One of those hot midday summer calls, didn’t sleep great, headachy. I was finishing too many of her sentences but aiming for efficiency (win if I guess right!)

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🔸 Collapse. There’s a lot riding on this.

🔹 Parts:

• Rage: you never want to work w me
• Urgency has to be there because motivation and drive are not.
• Collapse is overwhelm + distraction (the 2)
• Grief from how time was spent in 20s. Lost, unhappy, alone. Wanted somebody to get her. 21 year old by the river. Wants me to write.
• The one who wants to hide from responsibility, career

🎓 What I'd like to do differently:

Tech problems had me flustered. Justine's intuition is so strong, I'm hesitant to open my mouth.

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