Safe

A Memoir of Fatherhood, Foster Care, and the Risks We Take for Family

By: Mark Daley

Narrated by: Mark Daley

“If you want a lifechanging book, this is the one to read.” —The View

“A truly revealing” (Hillary Clinton) memoir of an unlikely journey to parenthood through America’s broken foster care system.

What does it take to keep a child safe?

As a long-time strategist and activist fighting for better outcomes for foster children, Mark Daley thought he knew the answer. But when Ethan and Logan, an adorable infant and a precocious toddler, entered their lives, Mark and his husband Jason quickly realized they were not remotely prepared for the uncertainty and complication of foster parenting.

Every day seven hundred children enter the foster care system in the United States, and thousands more live on the brink. Safe offers a deeply personal and “riveting” (Booklist) window into what happens when the universal longing for family crashes up against the unique madness and bureaucracy of a child protection system that often fails to consider the needs of the most vulnerable parties of all—the children themselves.

Daley takes us on a roller-coaster ride as he and Jason grapple with Ethan and Logan’s potential reunification with their biological family, learn brutal lessons about sacrifice, acceptance, and healing, and face the honest, heartbreaking, and sometimes hilarious challenges of becoming a parent at the intersection of intergenerational trauma, inadequate social support, and systemic issues of prejudice.

For fans of Nicole Chung’s All You Can Ever Know, Stephanie Land’s Maid, and Roxanna Asgarian’s We Were Once a Family, Safe is “a strong indictment of a failed child welfare system, but with an unexpectedly happy ending that speaks to the power of love” (Kirkus Reviews).

One of the best books I've read in years

This book is deeply rich with humor and love as the author navigates loss and the impossibility of the U.S. foster care system. Turning trauma and heartbreak into the beautiful family he has now, the author's voice shines through as if you're sitting at his kitchen table or having a martini on a parent's night out. It's a book I didn't want to end as I laughed through tears, and walked away ready to fight for a better system for all kids who deserve loving, SAFE homes.

So much love and support to give.

The authors ability to tell his story is raw and loving at the same time. I cried and laughed and sometimes shook my head when hearing how the different agencies screwed up at times. If I could have given this book and author ten stars I would! Reading or listening is a must!

safe

this book should be shared with anyone who is thinking about fostering. The foster care system is unfortunately broken. the life's of the child are raw and many times the children need alot of services.
I buy no means think that people shouldn't foster but they should look at it from a place of real and challenging experiences.
thank you

A must

From the beginning I was captivated by the love, devotion, heartache and emotion Mark brought us. The vulnerability and personal choices made by and for them was felt in every word. Their journey through the foster care system. The struggles and the wins brought this story to life. He opens a world to a part of life some will never endure.

“The system was defective, and we were hostages to its incompetence.”

Mark and Jason’s journey to grow their family had me turning every page in hopes their dreams come true. Safe offers a foster parent’s perspective that illuminates the injustices children experience within the welfare system. “This case demonstrates how strain on county workers harm the well-being of the very children they’re charged to protect” (p. 195). Mark Daley’s, Safe was introduced to me at the 2024 Tucson Festival of Books. Daley was a panelist for the topic, Heavy Lifting of Social Reform.