This is part 2 of our series: Gaining confidence in your own abilities.

Today, we are discussing personal development.

Personal development will look different for each and every one of us out there. Because we're all unique and different.

In this episode, I discuss with you the steps you need to follow to gain confidence in your own abilities through personal development.

1. Reflection - reflect on why you have a lack of confidence in a certain area. If it's related to an historic event for example where someone said something about you, then ask yourself, is it true? If it's true, then do you need to do something about it to change that, like further study, speak to someone or practice those skills. If it's not true, then you need to let it go!

2. Learning - What learning do you have to do or engage in to learn more so that you can gain confidence is the thing that's holding you back?

3. Practice - Practice your new skill. You won't gain confidence by only participating in learning or listening to this podcast for example, you need to go and do the thing.

4. Feedback - Gain feedback from others so that you can improve where you still need to.

5. Get out of your comfort zone!

1. Navigate to https://www.womenoffaithinleadership.com where you can:

• Join the community of like-minded female Christian leaders. This is where I will be hanging out if I'm not on the podcast chatting to you all. Come share and support each other here.
• Subscribe to my newsletter so you can stay up to date with all upcoming episodes and any other exclusive or special offers.

2. If you need any support, you can get in contact with me for a 1:1 coaching session. Just email me at support@rikawhelan.com

3. Connect with me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rikawhelan

The world can make us feel like failures… people can make us feel like failures, but we are capable of anything in Christ!

In this 4-part series, I’ll discuss with you how you can gain confidence in your abilities and stop feeling like a failure, stop feeling like you’re not good enough and start believing that through Christ, you can do anything you set your mind to.

We all have a story of how we came to God, whether it was a long time ago or recent. But just like any relationship, you can’t grow in that relationship if:

• It’s only one-sided
• You don’t spend time together
• You don’t listen to one another
• You fight all the time

So too, in our relationship with God, we can’t grow, if we don’t treat the relationship, like a relationship.

1. Spend time in the word with God. If you don’t know where to start, choose a bible reading plan on the YouVersion Bible App. Or Get a study bible that will take you through the passages and explain them to you.
2. Spend time talking to God - praying, talking to Him and listening to sermons are some ways in which you can spend time with Him
3. Fellowship - growing with others by your side is a really amazing way to grow spiritually and you experience and feel different things in your relationship with God, when you are with others.
4. Standing up for your faith - a tough one, but the more you stand up for your faith, the more confident you grow as well.
5. Sharing/living your faith - with your children, with others around you and sharing when people ask, invite people to church with you, give people bibles
6. Praise and worship - there is something about praise and worship that just connects my soul directly with the Lord. Taking the time to praise him and worship him and thanking him for what he has done, for who He is and for what is to come, grows you spiritually with the Lord.

Stay tuned, in the next couple of episodes, I’ll be chatting with you about:

• Episode 62: Personal growth
• Episode 63: Professional development
• Episode 64: Community Support

and how you can use these to gain confidence in your own abilities.

1. Navigate to https://www.womenoffaithinleadership.com where you can:

• Join the community of like-minded female Christian leaders. This is where I will be hanging out if I'm not on the podcast chatting to you all. Come share and support each other here.
• Subscribe to my newsletter so you can stay up to date with all upcoming episodes and any other exclusive or special offers.

2. If you need any support, you can get in contact with me for a 1:1 coaching session. Just email me at support@rikawhelan.com

3. Connect with me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rikawhelan

When I stepped into one of the biggest leadership roles I’d ever held, I wanted to be assertive.

I wanted to walk into a room, be confident (not timid because that’s how I felt) and have everybody listen to me.

That’s not what being assertive means at all… but honestly, I didn’t quite know what it meant to be assertive.

Assertiveness can often be confused with aggressiveness.

People who are assertive are often labelled as being too aggressive with their approach.

So, hence the question… should female Christian leaders be assertive?

Let’s get that question answered!

Let’s have a look first at what it actually means to be assertive…

According to Risely.me, assertiveness refers to the ability to express one’s thoughts, feelings, and needs in a clear, direct, and respectful manner while also considering the rights and opinions of others.

It is a communication and behavioural style that promotes open and honest expression, confidence, and self-assuredness without infringing upon the rights and boundaries of others.

Now, assertiveness is often confused with aggressiveness as I mentioned before.

And aggressiveness refers to the behaviour or communication style that is characterised by forcefulness, hostility, and the disregard for the rights and feelings of others.

Aggressiveness involves a proactive approach to achieving one’s own goals or asserting one’s dominance, often at the expense of others. It can manifest in the form of verbal, physical or passive-aggressive actions.

Consider the definition of assertiveness, where you express your thoughts, feelings, and needs in a clear, direct, and respectful manner while also considering the rights and opinions of others.

So in my humble opinion, yes, female Christian leaders can and should be assertive.

You might wonder how can I learn to express my thoughts, feelings, and needs in a clear, direct, and respectful manner while also considering the rights and opinions of others.

1. Role-playing - seems silly, but by practising with someone else, you make it fun and less intimidating
2. Workshops and training - there are some workshops and that you can attend on this very topic, there is also usually a fair bit of role-playing involved to practice what you learn
3. Putting your skills into practice! Practice makes perfect. Very few people just learn something and then get it right the first time, so practice practice, practice.

In an upcoming episode, I’ll be talking to you about how you can gain self-confidence in your abilities. I believe this to be a good follow on, because self-confidence is extremely important. If you don’t believe in yourself, other people might also not. Stay tuned for the next episode.

1. Navigate to https://www.womenoffaithinleadership.com where you can:

• Join the community of like-minded female Christian leaders. This is where I will be hanging out if I'm not on the podcast chatting to you all. Come share and support each other here.
• Subscribe to my newsletter so you can stay up to date with all upcoming episodes and any other exclusive or special offers.

2. If you need any support, you can get in contact with me for a 1:1 coaching session. Just email me at support@rikawhelan.com

3. Connect with me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rikawhelan