Mama

A Queer Black Woman's Story of a Family Lost and Found

By: Nikkya Hargrove

Narrated by: Grace Porter

Finalist for the Lambda Literary Award in Lesbian Memoir/Biography

In this searing and uplifting memoir, a young Black queer woman fresh out of college adopts her baby brother after their incarcerated mother dies, determined to create the kind of family she never had.

Growing up, Nikkya Hargrove’s mother was in and out of prison. Hargrove, one of the 5 million children dealing with the effects of an incarcerated parent, spent a good portion of her childhood in prison visiting rooms. After her baby brother was born, Hargrove decided to fight for custody–even though she had only just graduated college.

We see how she is subjected to preconceived notions that she, a Black, queer, young woman, cannot handle the responsibility. She shares about the shame she feels accepting food stamps, her family’s reaction to her coming out, and the joy she experiences when she meets the woman who will become her wife. Whether she’s clashing with her brother's biological father or battling for Jonathan’s education rights after he’s diagnosed with ADHD and autism, this is a woman who won’t give up.

Hargrove’s memoir picks up where Bryan Stevenson’s Just Mercy left off, exploring generational trauma and pulling back the curtain on family court and poverty in America. Moving and inspiring, Mama is an ode to motherhood and identity, to never giving up, and to finding strength in family and community.

Critic reviews

“A powerful and moving testament to love and redemption.”
—Phuc Tran, author of Sigh, Gone: A Misfit’s Memoir of Great Books, Punk Rock, and the Fight to Fit In

“Mama is an evocative, unflinching, and ultimately triumphant tale of the burdens and bounty of familial love. Both brilliant and brave, Hargrove opens her heart on every page of this notable debut, and the result is transcendent.”—Mat Johnson, author of Invisible Things and Pym

“Mama is unforgettable: a compassionate, wise, observant, full-hearted, and beautifully crafted memoir of queer love and family that is destined to be beloved by many readers and will leave you cheering. Hargrove offers a deep and stirring view of the impacts of addiction and the criminal justice system on Black women, offering an account of hope, heartbreak, faith, courage, joy, and the comfort and care of extended and chosen families.”
—Sonya Huber, author of Voice First: A Writer's Manifesto and Pain Woman Takes Your Keys

“Bracing, intimate, and immensely personal, Mama is also a quintessential story of our American generation: the story of growing up in the throes of Mass Incarceration. Now, as a mother and author, Nikkya shares that story with the same courage with which she faced so many challenges before. Anyone interested in forging a better American future should read this book.”
—Max Kenner, founder and executive director, Bard Prison Initiative

Queer book

It was ok, i enjoyed the trumph after trauma storyline. Black queer stories that do not emphasize sex.

Smart powerful story of resilience.

Awesome story of resilience, love, and the reality of our country slowly waking up to the power and wisdom of queer black women.

What a sweet story, laced in hope!

I truly enjoyed this book! I was introduced and drawn to this story because I know the narrator! Grace….you did an AMAZING JOB with this and brought this story to life with an amazing performance! As far as the story, if this is a true story, I believe you did a great job weaving in all of the complicated pieces, yet keeping an undertone of hope throughout! As a future social worker in training, I liked how you included the mental health aspect! It felt good to know the terms you mentioned! I felt the disappointment, the frustration, the pain and the joy! Nicely written! Great job to the entire production team! Well done!

Extraordinary storytelling & unexpected love story

I am floored by the imagery, the raw honesty and the way Hargrove takes us on this journey. A love story on a myriad of levels. A story that proves that love prevails and cycles CAN be broken, that only we can define what family means for us. A story of survival and reclaiming the narrative. Beauty & truth in storytelling.

Compelling

I really enjoyed this book. It is well written and really draws the reader in. I found myself wanting to hear more. I attended church with the author, her wife, Jonathan and their twin daughters. I was not aware that Jonathan was her brother and not her son. Having read this book it enforces the adage “that you never know what someone is going through or has gone through, therefore we should treat each other with kindness”. The narrator did a wonderful job, she sounds like Nikkya which made the story even more compelling.