Are You Mad at Me?

How to Stop Focusing on What Others Think and Start Living for You

By: Meg Josephson

Narrated by: Meg Josephson

Includes a mindfulness meditation led by the author!

Instant New York Times Bestseller

From psychotherapist and social media star Meg Josephson, a groundbreaking “cure for chronic people-pleasing” (Adam Grant, #1 New York Times bestselling author) that explores the common survival instinct called fawning and offers “explanations, comfort, and best of all, solutions” (Christie Tate, New York Times bestselling author).

Are you...

- Constantly worried about what people think of you, if they like you, if they’re mad at you?
- The eldest daughter and/or the angry daughter?
- Anxious, a perfectionist, or an overachiever?
- Always overextending yourself (and then resentful)?
- Someone who avoids conflict at all costs?
- Fearful of getting into trouble or being seen as “bad”?
- Silencing your needs for the comfort and happiness of everyone else?
- Prone to overexplain or over apologize?
- Eternally obsessing over why someone texted with a period instead of an exclamation point?

Psychotherapist Meg Josephson is here to show you that people-pleasing is not a personality trait. It’s a common survival mechanism known as “fawning”: an instinct often learned in childhood to become more appealing to a perceived threat in order to feel safe. Yet many people are stuck in this way of being for their whole lives. Are You Mad at Me? weaves Josephson’s own moving story with that of fascinating client stories and thought-provoking exercises to show you how to:

- Identify all the roles you might play—from peacekeeper to performer to caretaker to lone wolf to perfectionist to chameleon—that keep you far from yourself.
- Stop fearing your thoughts and emotions, even if they’re unpleasant.
- Rethink conflict and boundaries as an opening for deeper connection.
- Practice “leaning back” in relationships.
- Recognize when people-pleasing is actually necessary (with your chaotic boss) and when it’s not (with your close friends) and stop self-loathing when you slip into old patterns.
- Shift away from the familiar chaos, anxiety, and resentment you’re used to as you move closer to yourself and a life that no longer depletes you—but brings you joy.

With Josephson’s “lucid prose and smart mix of clinical expertise, personal disclosure, and pertinent case studies” (Publishers Weekly), Are You Mad at Me? will help you shed the behaviors that are keeping you stuck in the past so that you can live in your most authentic present.

Compelling, coherent, with compassionate voice

This was an excellent “read,” I.e., listen, both in content and delivery. Very, very useful.

You need this book

What a beautiful story and awareness shared from a place of love. Thank you for sharing and helping to process on so many levels!

A great book about the fawn response

I loved the author’s authenticity and I related to so much of her story. I especially loved the way she consolidated so much wisdom, and the mindfulness meditation at the end of the audiobook. A hopeful book for healing and self compassion.

Clear, actionable, and so relatable.

This book not only had a very clear story orientation to understand each concept, but there are many actionable items that are clear, simple, and accessible. Although not easy, the author created a very clear guide for how to step out of fawning, and step into your true self

In my skin

Wow, growing up with two alcoholic parents, I couldn’t put words to the feeling of not being real and when will all this pain stop. Meg, absolutely defined and pointed out how to start positive changes with Boundaries. I loved how she said boundaries are for you, not the other person. At 52 I believe with Meg’s gentle guidance.. I will be about to slowly start learning to put myself first because I do matter.. even if my little girl is still wanting to prove it.