Crying Out Loud with Dr. Laura Berman Podcast By Dr. Laura Berman cover art

Crying Out Loud with Dr. Laura Berman

Crying Out Loud with Dr. Laura Berman

By: Dr. Laura Berman
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Crying Out Loud is a grief companion for anyone carrying loss. Hosted by Dr. Laura Berman, bestselling author, therapist, and grieving mother, the show blends clinical guidance with spiritual insight to support healing on every level. Each week features conversations with experts, healers and mediums to help regulate your nervous system, honor your grief, and explore continued connection with loved ones on the other side. You were never meant to grieve alone. Let’s cry out loud together. Hygiene & Healthy Living Psychology Psychology & Mental Health Relationships Social Sciences
Episodes
  • Renegade Grief with Carla Fernandez

    Renegade Grief with Carla Fernandez
    Aug 6 2026
    Grief has a way of making everyone else uncomfortable. After the funeral, the messages slow down. A few days later, people expect life to carry on as if nothing happened. You're back at work. You stop bringing up the person who died because it feels like everyone else has already moved on. But you haven't. The truth is, life never goes back to what it was after losing someone you love. Carla Fernandez has spent years challenging that way of thinking. She is the author of Renegade Grief and co-founder of The Dinner Party, a community that has supported more than 20,000 young adults after the death of someone they love. Her work has helped reshape how a generation thinks about loss, replacing isolation with connection and making grief something people can share instead of hide. In this episode of Crying Out Loud, I sit down with Carla to talk about what she calls renegade grief: choosing to grieve honestly in a culture that would rather you keep your pain quiet. Together, we explore what happens when we stop trying to "move on" and start making room for grief instead. We talk about creating new rituals, building altars, taking grief pilgrimages, holding onto continuing bonds with the people we've lost, and why healing doesn't mean leaving someone behind. This conversation isn't about fixing grief or making it disappear. It's about permitting yourself to grieve in a way that feels true to you and remembering that you never have to carry it alone. How Western culture became wired to avoid grief, and why the myth of “closure” is so damaging The truth about Freud’s theories on grief, and how even he changed his mind after his own loss Why connection with other grievers can be the most powerful catalyst for healing. How rituals and creativity emerge naturally from our longing to honor and remember Simple, deeply personal ways to keep bonds alive: altars, “grief quests,” and everyday practices that create meaning The immense value of finding (or becoming) a “grief ally,” and why your support may change another’s entire experience The misunderstood line between helping others and bypassing your own pain, and how to find a healthy balance How metaphysical beliefs, neuroscience, and cultural rituals intersect in the ongoing relationship we have with those we grieve This one isn't about getting past your grief. It's about what happens the moment you stop trying to. Find Carla's book, Renegade Grief (recently out in paperback) You don't have to carry this alone. My book, Crying Out Loud: A Path Through Grief Into a Life Reimagined, and The Grief Healing Collective are both here if you need them. And if something in this episode moved you, tell me at cryingoutloudpod@gmail.com. Press play. You'll never set the table the same way again.
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    47 mins
  • The Myth of Closure: Ambiguous with Dr. Pauline Boss

    The Myth of Closure: Ambiguous with Dr. Pauline Boss
    Jul 30 2026
    Some losses come with a funeral. People bring food. They hug you. They say, "I'm so sorry for your loss." Some rituals help you begin to make sense of what has happened. But some losses don't look like loss at all. They're the kind that keep you awake at night, staring at your phone, wondering if it will ring. They're the kind where your child is still alive, but addiction has taken so much of who they used to be. Or where your husband or wife still sits across from you at the dinner table, but Alzheimer's has slowly stolen the person you spent your life building memories with. You find yourself missing someone who is still here. You keep hoping that tomorrow will be different. That they'll come back to you. That you'll hear their laugh again, see that familiar spark in their eyes, have one more conversation that feels like the old days. And because they're still alive, people don't always see your grief. There's no funeral. No obituary. No clear moment when everyone agrees your life has changed forever. You're left carrying heartbreak that has no ceremony, no roadmap, and often, no words. You're grieving someone who hasn't died, and at the same time, you're holding onto hope that maybe you haven't lost them completely. For more than fifty years, my guest in this episode has been giving that experience a name. Dr. Pauline Boss is a family therapist, researcher, and professor emerita at the University of Minnesota. She coined the term ambiguous loss, a concept that changed how we understand grief without an ending. It began with her research on the wives of soldiers missing in Vietnam, and it has since become the framework millions turn to for the losses that don't come with a clear before and after: a parent lost to dementia, a child in the grip of addiction, a family torn apart by estrangement, a loved one who simply goes missing. She's the author of several landmark books, including Ambiguous Loss, Loving Someone Who Has Dementia, and her most recent, The Myth of Closure: Ambiguous Loss in a Time of Pandemic and Change. Her most radical idea may be her simplest: closure is a myth. And chasing it may be keeping you from actually healing. In this Language of Love Conversation, I sit down with Dr. Boss to talk about what it means to grieve someone who is still, in some sense, unaccounted for. She walks me through the six pillars she's identified for building a life inside that uncertainty, why "both/and" thinking may be the most freeing shift a grieving person can make, and why the families who cope best are often the ones who stop trying to solve what cannot be solved. I also open up about the night my own son Sammy died, and the lesson my younger son taught me about what it really means to let your children see you grieve. This episode is for anyone carrying a loss the world doesn't have a category for, and anyone ready to stop waiting for an ending that isn't coming so they can start living again. What ambiguous loss is, and why it can be even harder to carry than a loss with clear finality Why “closure” is a myth, and how to let go of the pressure to find it. How rituals, continuing bonds, and community can transform the lonely experience of ambiguous loss. Why watching someone you love struggle with addiction is its own form of ambiguous loss, and why that recognition can bring real relief Why "both/and" thinking, holding two opposing truths at once, may be the most honest form of coping The six guideposts Dr. Boss has identified for building resilience without closure Why grief and depression are not the same thing, and why that distinction matters How to memorialize someone when there's no grave, no headstone, and no clear ending How to support children through ambiguous loss What decades of working with the most unimaginable losses have taught Dr. Boss about the human spirit To learn more about Dr. Pauline Boss and her work, visit her website, where you'll find her books, including The Myth of Closure and Ambiguous Loss, along with resources for families and professionals navigating loss without resolution. If you are moving through grief, heartbreak, or a season of profound change, you do not have to carry it alone. Make sure to read my book, Crying Out Loud: A Path Through Grief Into a Life Reimagined. Also, The Grief Healing Collective offers support, connection, and a community that understands what it means to rebuild a life after loss. If something in this conversation moved you, reach out at cryingoutloudpod@gmail.com. Healing does not happen in isolation. It happens in moments like this one.
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    45 mins
  • The Relationship With Your Mother Doesn't End When She Dies with Hope Edelman

    The Relationship With Your Mother Doesn't End When She Dies with Hope Edelman
    Jul 23 2026
    Losing your mother changes you in ways you don't always recognize at first. It isn't only the moment she dies that hurts. It's all the moments that follow. The day you instinctively reach for your phone to call her. The holiday when her chair sits empty. The milestone you wish she could have witnessed. The ordinary Tuesday when you realize no one else remembers your childhood quite the way she did. For many people, the grief doesn't disappear. It evolves. It resurfaces at unexpected moments, asking us to grow into it again and again. For more than thirty years, Hope Edelman has helped millions of women understand that experience. After losing her own mother to breast cancer at seventeen, she searched for a roadmap that didn't exist. So she created one. Her groundbreaking book Motherless Daughters gave language to a grief that countless women had been carrying alone, becoming a New York Times bestseller and one of the most influential books ever written about the loss of a mother. But after decades of listening to thousands of grieving daughters, Hope's understanding of grief has changed. She no longer believes healing means moving on. Instead, she believes our relationships with the people we love continue long after they're gone, and that learning how to carry them with us may be one of the most important parts of healing. In this deeply moving conversation, Hope shares why the age you were when your mother died continues to shape your life, why siblings can experience the same loss in completely different ways, and why some part of us can remain the age we were when the person we loved died. She also shares the extraordinary story of a desperate moment on a New York City fire escape, when she reached out to her mother years after her death and received an answer she never expected. Whether you've lost your mother, another parent, or anyone whose love helped shape who you are, this conversation offers both validation and hope. It reminds us that grief isn't something we finish. It's a relationship we learn to live alongside. And sometimes, the people we love continue to guide us in ways we never imagined. In this episode, we discuss: Why grief doesn't follow a timeline and can resurface decades after a loss. How your age at the time someone died may still influence your life today. Why siblings often experience the same loss in profoundly different ways. The surprising reason part of us can remain emotionally connected to the age we were when our loved one died. Why healing doesn't require letting go of the person you love. The signs, synchronicities, and continuing bonds many grieving people experience after loss. How healing is possible even when the relationship with your mother was complicated, distant, or painful. To learn more about Hope Edelman, visit her website. On the homepage, you will find a free self-guided journal and video to support your grief journey. She also offers weekly support group calls, four-day retreats, and individual coaching. If you are moving through grief, heartbreak, or a season of profound change, you do not have to carry it alone. Make sure to read Dr Berman’s book, Crying Out Loud: A Path Through Grief Into a Life Reimagined. Also, The Grief Healing Collective offers support, connection, and a community that understands what it means to rebuild a life after loss. If something in this conversation moved you, reach out at cryingoutloudpod@gmail.com. Healing does not happen in isolation. It happens in moments like this one.
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    47 mins
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