Between Two Kingdoms

A Memoir of a Life Interrupted

By: Suleika Jaouad

Narrated by: Suleika Jaouad

Length: 13 hrs and 2 mins

Publisher's summary

New York Times best seller

A searing, deeply moving memoir of illness and recovery that traces one young woman’s journey from diagnosis to remission to reentry into “normal” life - from the author of the Life, Interrupted column in The New York Times

One of the Best Books of the Year: The New York Times Book Review, The Washington Post, Bloomberg, The Rumpus, She Reads, Library Journal, Booklist

“I was immersed for the whole ride and would follow Jaouad anywhere.... Her writing restores the moon, lights the way as we learn to endure the unknown.” (Chanel Miller, The New York Times Book Review)

“Beautifully crafted...affecting...a transformative read.... Jaouad’s insights about the self, connectedness, uncertainty and time speak to all of us.” (The Washington Post)

In the summer after graduating from college, Suleika Jaouad was preparing, as they say in commencement speeches, to enter “the real world”. She had fallen in love and moved to Paris to pursue her dream of becoming a war correspondent. The real world she found, however, would take her into a very different kind of conflict zone.

It started with an itch - first on her feet, then up her legs, like a thousand invisible mosquito bites. Next came the exhaustion, and the six-hour naps that only deepened her fatigue. Then a trip to the doctor and, a few weeks shy of her 23rd birthday, a diagnosis: leukemia, with a 35 percent chance of survival. Just like that, the life she had imagined for herself had gone up in flames. By the time Jaouad flew home to New York, she had lost her job, her apartment, and her independence. She would spend much of the next four years in a hospital bed, fighting for her life and chronicling the saga in a column for The New York Times.

When Jaouad finally walked out of the cancer ward - after countless rounds of chemo, a clinical trial, and a bone marrow transplant - she was, according to the doctors, cured. But as she would soon learn, a cure is not where the work of healing ends; it’s where it begins. She had spent the past 1,500 days in desperate pursuit of one goal - to survive. And now that she’d done so, she realized that she had no idea how to live.

How would she reenter the world and live again? How could she reclaim what had been lost? Jaouad embarked - with her new best friend, Oscar, a scruffy terrier mutt - on a 100-day, 15,000-mile road trip across the country. She set out to meet some of the strangers who had written to her during her years in the hospital: a teenage girl in Florida also recovering from cancer; a teacher in California grieving the death of her son; a death-row inmate in Texas who’d spent his own years confined to a room. What she learned on this trip is that the divide between sick and well is porous, that the vast majority of us will travel back and forth between these realms throughout our lives. Between Two Kingdoms is a profound chronicle of survivorship and a fierce, tender, and inspiring exploration of what it means to begin again.

©2021 Suleika Jaouad (P)2021 Random House Audio

Critic reviews

“A beautiful, elegant, and heartbreaking book that provides a glimpse into the kingdom of illness...Suleika Jaouad avoids sentimentality but manages to convey the depth of the emotional turmoil that illness can bring into our lives.” (Siddhartha Mukherjee, author of The Emperor of All Maladies)

"Here is the key to Between Two Kingdoms - Jaouad’s disarming honesty. There is no self-pity in this telling and few of the expected pieties....Jaouad is writing about a process, a back-and-forth. In the tension between health and sickness, past and present, a new balance must be forged.” (Los Angeles Times)

"I want to describe Suleika Jaouad with words like ‘courageous’, ‘resilient’, ‘vulnerable’, and ‘inspiring’ - but I understand that, for cancer survivors, these words can feel like empty clichés. The problem is, these words are true. Suleika Jaouad is courageous, resilient, vulnerable, and inspiring. And her memoir about her cancer journey is a work of breathtaking creativity and heart-stopping humanity. Jaouad’s story goes where you never expect it to go - not only into the depths of her own pain and lost years, but into the spirits of countless strangers (sick and well) she meets along the highway of own her life and illuminates with rare generosity and grace. This is a deeply moving and passionate work of art, quite unlike anything I’ve ever read. I will remember these stories for years to come, because Suleika Jaouad has imprinted them on my heart.” (Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat Pray Love)

“Jaouad’s book stands out not only because she has lived to parse the saga of her medical battle with the benefit of hindsight, but also because it encompasses the less familiar tale of what it’s like to survive and have to figure out how to live again.” (NPR)

Moving, honest and sharp

I enjoyed this book immensely. The author is clearly a very smart, sensitive young woman and a talented storyteller. Her tragedy becomes a gift to us all and a lesson about humanity in her telling.

I am somewhat older with a less life threatening but chronic condition and went through many of the emotions and discoveries she has in my twenties with less “at stake”. I was luckier but may not be going forward. “In-between-ness” is a permanent condition we all share. Her clarity and honesty about it made me sad and hopeful at once. Thank you, Suleika.

Life changing

SuSu’s journey is tragic, but the way she wanders through each phase of her illness and treatment into a state of health is profound. The lessons she learned by herself and from those who shared in the journey can be applied to many life challenges. Thank you for sharing.

A hero journey filled with rich, full spectrum emotion and courage.

This book is especially recommend for anyone recovering from arrested emotional development and post trauma stress.

Uber Human

Unimaginable pain, discordant landscapes, unlikey relationships - Suleika Jaouad weaves her own story into an unbelievable human fabric. A must read for anyone - and everyone - looking to experience what connects us.

Fantastic, honest and heartfelt

A must read! Beautifully written. I love books that take you on a journey, as if you were right there in the room. This is one of those books.

Inspiring and amazing

Suleika is such an amazing soul! This book I could not stop listening too! With Suleika reading the book it was even more hearts topping! She is so thoughtful and brave I feel like I’ve been on the journey with her. Thank you Suleika... thank you for sharing your life. 💕❤️ I wish you nothing but the most amazing future!

Good listen

Very easy to listen to and follow the story line. It is very depressing and if someone in your family is battling cancer, don’t read this. I’m not sure what made me go to this book but her story really is truly amazing.

Unexpected but Good

I thought this would be a story more about living on the road, but it is more cancer journey focused than I expected. That being said, it’s a wonderful read that makes you think and appreciate life.

What an Amazing Journey

Thankful for family, thankful for friends, and especially thankful for brothers. What an amazing journey. Thank you for sharing your story.

Quite a saga

My wife and I enjoyed listening to this adventure. The arc of the story is difficult for a good while, but there is adventure on every page. The authors imagery is compelling. A remarkable writer.