-
Miserable You
- A Handy Guide to Unhappiness You’re Already Following
- Narrated by: Ron Mileti
- Length: 3 hrs and 28 mins
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
Prime members: New to Audible?Get 2 free audiobooks during trial.
Miserable You
Buy for $14.95
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
Publisher's summary
MISERABLE YOU: A Handy Guide To Unhappiness You’re Already Following
THE ANTI-SELF-HELP BOOK!
Don't like self-help or motivational books? Then this one is for you! Laugh so hard, milk and negative thoughts shoot out your nose.
This sarcastic and hysterical guide will teach you how to be even more miserable (or, if you insist, instead use the book to discover what self-torture you’ve been unintentionally using on yourself and learn how to stop doing that!).
Written by former Tony Robbins Coach and Nationally Award-Winning Writer Ron Mileti.
YOU’VE BEEN DABBLING IN MISERY LONG ENOUGH.
LET’S LEVEL UP YOUR GAME!
Maybe you’re hap-hap-happy. Or maybe you feel “meh.” Or maybe you want to run screaming into the woods. Wherever you’re at in life, whatever you’re feeling, CONSIDER YOU’RE NOT MISERABLE ENOUGH! Here’s your step-by-step guide to an utterly, wonderfully, beautifully miserable life!
SURE, THIS BOOK MAY HAVE THE OPPOSITE EFFECT.
IT MIGHT SLAP YOU AWAKE.
You might finally realize that this is your one and only life, and you better get to the smiling already. But if you’re truly committed to suffering (from those inch-deep wrinkles on your forehead, seems like you are!), then buy the book and make yourself even more wretched! Or, if you insist, instead use the book to discover what self-torture you’ve been unintentionally using on yourself and learn how to stop doing that!
“Lessons" or Chapters Include:
1. Start Many Things, Finish Nothing
2. Be In a Bad Mood Often
3. Interpret Things In The Worst Way Possible
4. Believe Life Has Meaning With A Capital M
5. Appreciate Nothing
6 Learn To Be Helpless
7. Remember: You’re Da Man, So Go It Alone
8. Ask Bad Questions
9. Take, Don’t Give
10. Focus On Trivial S---t
11. Never Feel Like You Have Enough
12. Don’t Question Who You Are
13. Ignore Your Words
14. Never Forgive. Never Forget.
15. Deny Your Desires (You Don’t Deserve Them)
16. Envision A Horrible Future
17. Look The Other Way
THE BONK ON THE HEAD YOU NEED FOR A BREAKTHROUGH!
Related to this topic
-
Born a Crime
- Stories from a South African Childhood
- By: Trevor Noah
- Narrated by: Trevor Noah
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 214,452
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 194,035
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 193,064
In this award-winning Audible Studios production, Trevor Noah tells his wild coming-of-age tale during the twilight of apartheid in South Africa. It’s a story that begins with his mother throwing him from a moving van to save him from a potentially fatal dispute with gangsters, then follows the budding comedian’s path to self-discovery through episodes both poignant and comical.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Great book and perfect narration
- By MarilynArms on 12-15-16
By: Trevor Noah
-
Slaughterhouse-Five
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: James Franco
- Length: 5 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 18,820
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 16,828
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 16,803
Traumatized by the bombing of Dresden at the time he had been imprisoned, Pilgrim drifts through all events and history, sometimes deeply implicated, sometimes a witness. He is surrounded by Vonnegut's usual large cast of continuing characters (notably here the hack science fiction writer Kilgore Trout and the alien Tralfamadorians, who oversee his life and remind him constantly that there is no causation, no order, no motive to existence).
-
4 out of 5 stars
-
Don't Quit Your Daytime Job, James
- By Keith on 11-20-15
By: Kurt Vonnegut
-
Wild with Happy
- By: Colman Domingo
- Narrated by: Colman Domingo, Alex Newell, Sharon Washington, and others
- Length: 1 hr and 32 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 381
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 369
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 369
Gil (Domingo) is a struggling NYC actor who heads home to Philadelphia after the passing of his mother, Adelaide (Winfrey). The plan is to tidy-up her affairs as quickly and efficiently as possible, until a few unpredictably hilarious detours ensue. With his Aunt Glo (Washington) insisting on a proper burial, but an urn of ashes already in his hand, Gil gets thrown into a car by his best friend (Newell).
-
2 out of 5 stars
-
All hollas and hallelujahs
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 06-14-24
By: Colman Domingo
-
I Can't Make This Up
- Life Lessons
- By: Neil Strauss - contributor, Kevin Hart
- Narrated by: Kevin Hart
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 55,925
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 50,379
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 50,123
Superstar comedian and Hollywood box-office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Best Audiobook I Ever Listened To
- By Sam Clear on 07-13-17
By: Neil Strauss - contributor, and others
-
Space Force
- By: Jeremy Robinson
- Narrated by: Jeffrey Kafer, Emily Woo Zeller, Machelle Williams
- Length: 9 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 3,601
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 3,356
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 3,349
Five years ago, the US Space Force became a reality. And while those writing the checks took things very seriously, the other military branches did not. As a result, Space Force was populated by undesirables. My name is Captain Ethan Stone, a decorated member of SEAL Team Six turned Space Force "recruit". Flash forward five years and between tenses. President West is in office. Power has shifted. And Space Force is defunded. With just a handful of us still living on base, we find ourselves being evicted. But before all of us can leave, aliens invade.
-
1 out of 5 stars
-
disappointed
- By Justin H on 03-15-19
By: Jeremy Robinson
-
Heads Will Roll
- By: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne
- Narrated by: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne, Tim Gunn, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 6 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 17,366
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 15,824
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 15,758
Heads Will Roll is an Audible Original from Saturday Night Live star Kate McKinnon and her cocreator/costar (and real-life sister) Emily Lynne. Produced by Broadway Video, this is not an audiobook - it’s a 10-episode, star-studded audio comedy that features performances from Meryl Streep, Tim Gunn, Peter Dinklage, Queer Eye’s Fab Five, and so many more. Please note: This content is not for kids.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
More like this please
- By Anon893 on 05-03-19
By: Kate McKinnon, and others
-
Born a Crime
- Stories from a South African Childhood
- By: Trevor Noah
- Narrated by: Trevor Noah
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 214,452
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 194,035
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 193,064
In this award-winning Audible Studios production, Trevor Noah tells his wild coming-of-age tale during the twilight of apartheid in South Africa. It’s a story that begins with his mother throwing him from a moving van to save him from a potentially fatal dispute with gangsters, then follows the budding comedian’s path to self-discovery through episodes both poignant and comical.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Great book and perfect narration
- By MarilynArms on 12-15-16
By: Trevor Noah
-
Slaughterhouse-Five
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: James Franco
- Length: 5 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 18,820
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 16,828
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 16,803
Traumatized by the bombing of Dresden at the time he had been imprisoned, Pilgrim drifts through all events and history, sometimes deeply implicated, sometimes a witness. He is surrounded by Vonnegut's usual large cast of continuing characters (notably here the hack science fiction writer Kilgore Trout and the alien Tralfamadorians, who oversee his life and remind him constantly that there is no causation, no order, no motive to existence).
-
4 out of 5 stars
-
Don't Quit Your Daytime Job, James
- By Keith on 11-20-15
By: Kurt Vonnegut
-
Wild with Happy
- By: Colman Domingo
- Narrated by: Colman Domingo, Alex Newell, Sharon Washington, and others
- Length: 1 hr and 32 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 381
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 369
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 369
Gil (Domingo) is a struggling NYC actor who heads home to Philadelphia after the passing of his mother, Adelaide (Winfrey). The plan is to tidy-up her affairs as quickly and efficiently as possible, until a few unpredictably hilarious detours ensue. With his Aunt Glo (Washington) insisting on a proper burial, but an urn of ashes already in his hand, Gil gets thrown into a car by his best friend (Newell).
-
2 out of 5 stars
-
All hollas and hallelujahs
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 06-14-24
By: Colman Domingo
-
I Can't Make This Up
- Life Lessons
- By: Neil Strauss - contributor, Kevin Hart
- Narrated by: Kevin Hart
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 55,925
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 50,379
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 50,123
Superstar comedian and Hollywood box-office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Best Audiobook I Ever Listened To
- By Sam Clear on 07-13-17
By: Neil Strauss - contributor, and others
-
Space Force
- By: Jeremy Robinson
- Narrated by: Jeffrey Kafer, Emily Woo Zeller, Machelle Williams
- Length: 9 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 3,601
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 3,356
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 3,349
Five years ago, the US Space Force became a reality. And while those writing the checks took things very seriously, the other military branches did not. As a result, Space Force was populated by undesirables. My name is Captain Ethan Stone, a decorated member of SEAL Team Six turned Space Force "recruit". Flash forward five years and between tenses. President West is in office. Power has shifted. And Space Force is defunded. With just a handful of us still living on base, we find ourselves being evicted. But before all of us can leave, aliens invade.
-
1 out of 5 stars
-
disappointed
- By Justin H on 03-15-19
By: Jeremy Robinson
-
Heads Will Roll
- By: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne
- Narrated by: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne, Tim Gunn, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 6 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 17,366
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 15,824
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 15,758
Heads Will Roll is an Audible Original from Saturday Night Live star Kate McKinnon and her cocreator/costar (and real-life sister) Emily Lynne. Produced by Broadway Video, this is not an audiobook - it’s a 10-episode, star-studded audio comedy that features performances from Meryl Streep, Tim Gunn, Peter Dinklage, Queer Eye’s Fab Five, and so many more. Please note: This content is not for kids.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
More like this please
- By Anon893 on 05-03-19
By: Kate McKinnon, and others
-
Napoleon's Hemorrhoids…And Other Small Events That Changed History
- By: Phil Mason
- Narrated by: LJ Ganser
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 1,157
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 1,029
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 1,025
Hilarious, fascinating, and a roller coaster of dizzying, historical what-ifs, Napoleon's Hemorrhoids is a potpourri for serious historians and casual history buffs. In one of Phil Mason's many revelations, you'll learn that Communist jets were two minutes away from opening fire on American planes during the Cuban missile crisis, when they had to turn back as they were running out of fuel. You'll discover that before the Battle of Waterloo, Napoleon's painful hemorrhoids prevented him from mounting his horse to survey the battlefield.
-
3 out of 5 stars
-
They just throw the facts too fast
- By Concerned_llama on 12-11-20
By: Phil Mason
-
American Psycho
- By: Bret Easton Ellis
- Narrated by: Pablo Schreiber
- Length: 16 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 5,207
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 4,621
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 4,629
Patrick Bateman moves among the young and trendy in 1980s Manhattan. Young, handsome, and well educated, Bateman earns his fortune on Wall Street by day while spending his nights in ways we cannot begin to fathom. Expressing his true self through torture and murder, Bateman prefigures an apocalyptic horror that no society could bear to confront.
-
4 out of 5 stars
-
Fanntastic book but maybe not for everyone....
- By So Fain on 03-27-11
-
Yellow Face
- A Semi-autobiographical Comedy
- By: David Henry Hwang
- Narrated by: Daniel Dae Kim (CK), Ashley Park, Wendell Pierce, and others
- Length: 1 hr and 44 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 221
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 182
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 182
Winner of an Obie and a finalist for the Pulitzer Prize, and directed by Tony nominee Leigh Silverman, Yellow Face is as timely as ever, wrestling with issues of cultural appropriation, complicity, and artistic freedom. It’s brought to life in this audio-only revival by a stunning all-star cast (many playing themselves) led by Daniel Dae Kim.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Funny, great audible performance, and good dialogue.
- By Ed the Canadian on 05-04-24
-
The Heron
- By: Don Winslow
- Narrated by: Ed Harris
- Length: 1 hr and 6 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 5,188
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 4,785
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 4,760
“The Heron” is the nickname a big-city accountant has attached to himself in his new home near San Diego, where he’s using the alias to avoid a hit man who may be after him. It seems a former client believes that The Heron has skipped town with several million dollars not his own. Don Winslow’s ensuing, entertaining yarn is by turns twisty, dark, and comical as we observe the delicate dance between the pursuer and the pursued.
-
2 out of 5 stars
-
Awfully long middle for such a short story
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 07-29-22
By: Don Winslow
-
Breakfast of Champions
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: John Malkovich
- Length: 6 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 4,276
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 3,861
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 3,852
Breakfast of Champions (1973) provides frantic, scattershot satire and a collage of Vonnegut's obsessions. His recurring cast of characters and American landscape was perhaps the most controversial of his canon; it was felt by many at the time to be a disappointing successor to Slaughterhouse-Five, which had made Vonnegut's literary reputation.
-
3 out of 5 stars
-
Kurt Was Right to Grade This a C
- By Dubi on 01-10-16
By: Kurt Vonnegut
-
Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come
- One Introvert's Year of Saying Yes
- By: Jessica Pan
- Narrated by: Jessica Pan
- Length: 8 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 108
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 103
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 103
What would happen if a shy introvert lived like a gregarious extrovert for one year? If she knowingly and willingly put herself in perilous social situations that she’d normally avoid at all costs? Writer Jessica Pan intends to find out. With the help of various extrovert mentors, Jessica sets up a series of personal challenges (talk to strangers, perform stand-up comedy, host a dinner party, travel alone, make friends on the road, and much, much worse) to explore whether living like an extrovert can teach her lessons that might improve the quality of her life.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Encouraging memoir: Sorry, cheer
- By Aaron Menz on 07-03-23
By: Jessica Pan