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Self-Reg
- How to Help Your Child (and You) Break the Stress Cycle and Successfully Engage with Life
- Narrated by: Robert Fass
- Length: 9 hrs and 2 mins
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Publisher's summary
The first parenting book to bring the science and psychology of children's behavior together to build brain/body awareness for self-regulation and success.
Self-Reg is a groundbreaking book that presents an entirely new understanding of your child's emotions and behavior and serves as a practical guide for parents to help their kids engage calmly and successfully in learning and life. Rooted in decades of clinical practice and research by leading child psychologist Dr. Stuart Shanker, Self-Reg realigns the power of the parent-child relationship for positive change.
Self-regulation is the nervous system's way of responding to stress. We are seeing a generation of children and teens with excessively high levels of stress and, as a result, an explosion of emotional, social, learning, behavior, and physical health problems. But few parents recognize the hidden stressors that their children are struggling with physiologically as well as socially and emotionally. An entrenched view of childrearing is seeing our children as lacking self-control or willpower, but the real basis for these problems lies in excessive stress.
Self-regulation can dramatically improve a child's mood, attention, and concentration. It can help children to feel empathy and to develop the sorts of virtues that every parent knows are vital for their child's long-term well-being. Self-regulation brings about profound and lasting transformation that continues to mature throughout life.
Shanker translates decades of his findings from working with children into practical, prescriptive advice for parents, giving them concrete ways to develop their self-regulation skills and teach their children how to do the same for optimal learning, social, and emotional growth as well as for overall well-being.
Critic reviews
“Though this book takes children’s needs as its focus, it is really focused on providing guidance - and even a degree of consolation - to adults as they navigate the often tricky parent-child relationship. Shanker gives readers clear explanations of even the more complex neurological information, such as the role of the limbic system, as well as ample diagrams. And the discussion does not stop at the early childhood stage, moving ultimately into adolescence. If the stressed populations most in need of this book’s lessons can find the time to read it, they will appreciate its potential to bring the minds of both parent and child to a state of heightened attentiveness with minimal anxiety.” (Publishers Weekly)
"Comprehensive data backs up a much-tested system that assists parents in getting their children to a calmer state of mind....straightforward and will be useful for any age level." (Kirkus Reviews)
“Our digital age is stressful, frantic and over-stimulating. Raising a child today requires an understanding of self-regulation. Self-Reg is a wonderful guide for parents, a way to understand the hidden stressors facing children, and their neurological, psychological, social, and emotional effects. Dr. Shanker helps parents not just to understand the meaning of their child’s behavior with compassion, but, just as essentially, how to calm themselves in order to better guide their children toward more positively engaged living.” (Catherine Steiner-Adair, EdD, author of The Big Disconnect: Protecting Childhood and Family Relationships in the Digital Age)
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Good info, hard to listen sometimes
- By Stephanie on 04-16-03
By: Daniel Goleman
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The Gentle Sleep Book
- For Calm Babies, Toddlers and Pre-Schoolers
- By: Sarah Ockwell-Smith
- Narrated by: Katy Sobey
- Length: 8 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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The Gentle Sleep Book offers gentle, no-tears sleep solutions for exhausted parents of newborns to five-year-olds. A large percentage of parents find their young children's sleep - or lack of - challenging. This new audiobook from Sarah Ockwell-Smith, founder of BabyCalm, will be an indispensable guide for parents, whatever challenges they are facing with their child's sleep - from the day they bring their newborn home until their child is settled in at school.
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It's fine but not much about 2-4 years
- By Patrick on 02-12-18
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The Dolphin Way
- A Parent's Guide to Raising Healthy, Happy, and Motivated Kids - without Turning into a Tiger
- By: Shimi Kang
- Narrated by: Karen Saltus
- Length: 9 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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The Dolphin Way walks readers through Dr. Kang’s four-part method for cultivating self-motivation. The audiobook makes a powerful case that we are not forced to choose between being permissive or controlling. The third option—the option that will prepare our kids for success in a future that will require adaptability - is the dolphin way.
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Very easy way to understand complicated subject
- By Nhat on 11-05-18
By: Shimi Kang
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WHY Do They Act That Way?
- A Survival Guide to the Adolescent Brain for You and Your Teen
- By: David Walsh, Nat Bennett
- Narrated by: Kaleo Griffith
- Length: 9 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Even smart kids do stupid things. It's a simple fact of life. No one makes it through the teenage years unscathed - not the teens and not their parents. But now there's expert help for both generations in this groundbreaking new guide for surviving the drama of adolescence. In WHY Do They Act That Way? nationally renowned, award-winning psychologist Dr. David Walsh explains exactly what happens to the human brain on the path from childhood into adolescence and adulthood.
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LOVE!!
- By Amazon Customer on 05-11-23
By: David Walsh, and others
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Child with ADHD
- Step-by-Step Guide to Parenting Children with Suspected or Newly Diagnosed ADHD (practical remedial tools, tips, proven techniques)
- By: Roxana C.
- Narrated by: Brennan Koenigsreuter
- Length: 5 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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An ADHD diagnosis may last a lifetime… but that’s no reason for it to define your child’s life. Are you feeling tired, strung-out, and out of patience with your child’s ADHD, even though you know it’s not their fault? You are the only one who can truly advocate for your kid… but you also get to a point where you need some help and support yourself.
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This book answers so many questions!
- By Hilary S. Ritter on 03-31-23
By: Roxana C.
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Brainstorm
- The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain
- By: Daniel J. Siegel M.D.
- Narrated by: Daniel J. Siegel M.D.
- Length: 10 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Between the ages of twelve and twenty-four, the brain changes in important and, at times, challenging ways. In Brainstorm, the renowned psychiatrist and bestselling author of Parenting from the Inside Out, The Whole-Brain Child, and Mindsight, Daniel Siegel busts a number of commonly held myths about adolescence — for example, that it is merely a stage of “immaturity” filled with often “crazy” behavior — to reveal how it is in fact a vital time in our lives in terms of charting the course for the adults we ultimately become.
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Narration for kindergarteners...
- By Kalutha on 03-28-14
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Raising Happiness
- 10 Simple Steps for More Joyful Kids and Happier Parents
- By: Christine Carter
- Narrated by: Emily Durante
- Length: 7 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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An essential guide to raising happy children from author Christine Carter, complete with tips, secrets, and strategies that will set the stage for positive emotions into adolescence and beyond.
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One of the best parenting books I have come across
- By Kristine on 02-05-13
By: Christine Carter
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Parenting Without Power Struggles
- Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids While Staying Cool, Calm, and Connected
- By: Susan Stiffelman
- Narrated by: Susan Stiffelman
- Length: 8 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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While most parenting programs are designed to coerce kids to change, Parenting Without Power Struggles does something innovative, showing you how to help your children awaken their natural instincts to cooperate, rather than employing threats or bribes, which inevitably fuels their resistance. By staying calm and being the confident "captain of the ship" your child needs, you will learn how to parent from a place of strong, durable connection, and you'll be better able to help your kids navigate the challenging moments of growing up.
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Highly recommended.
- By Nothing really matters on 10-13-13
By: Susan Stiffelman
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The Marshmallow Test
- Mastering Self-Control
- By: Walter Mischel
- Narrated by: Alan Alda
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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In The Marshmallow Test, Mischel explains how self-control can be mastered and applied to challenges in everyday life - from weight control to quitting smoking, overcoming heartbreak, making major decisions, and planning for retirement. With profound implications for the choices we make in parenting, education, public policy and self-care, The Marshmallow Test will change the way you think about who we are and what we can be.
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Great performance, but lacking in content
- By Hilary - San Francisco on 09-27-14
By: Walter Mischel
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Overcoming Oppositional Defiant Disorder
- A Two-Part Treatment Plan to Help Parents and Kids Work Together
- By: Gina Atencio-MacLean PsyD
- Narrated by: Tiffany Morgan
- Length: 4 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Parenting a child with oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) is difficult, stressful, and often overwhelming. Overcoming Oppositional Defiant Disorder is the first child psychology book that sets you up for success by recognizing that taking care of your child starts with taking care of yourself.
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Need more specifics
- By Lee on 05-14-24
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Being There
- Why Prioritizing Motherhood in the First Three Years Matters
- By: Erica Komisar, Sydny Miner
- Narrated by: Wendy Tremont King
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Compassionate and balanced, and focusing on the emotional health and well-being of children as well as that of the mothers who care for them, this book shows mothers and fathers how to give their children the best chance for developing into healthy and loving adults.
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Highly Recommended
- By Arocha on 03-09-18
By: Erica Komisar, and others
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Uncovering Happiness
- Overcoming Depression with Mindfulness and Self-compassion
- By: Elisha Goldstein PhD
- Narrated by: Eric Michael Summerer
- Length: 7 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Most of us believe when we're depressed that our situation is hopeless. That's a mistake, Dr. Elisha Goldstein reassures us in Uncovering Happiness. The secret to overcoming depression and uncovering happiness is in harnessing our brain's own natural antidepressant power and ultimately creating a more resilient antidepressant brain.
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Great book, but focused on depression.
- By wrenekape on 03-22-15
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The Opposite of Worry
- The Playful Parenting Approach to Childhood Anxieties and Fears
- By: Lawrence J. Cohen
- Narrated by: Johnny Heller
- Length: 8 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Whether it's the monster in the closet or the fear that arises from new social situations, school, or sports, anxiety can be especially challenging and maddening for children. And since anxiety has a mind of its own, logic and reassurance often fail, leaving parents increasingly frustrated about how to help. Now Lawrence J. Cohen, PhD, the author of Playful Parenting, provides a special set of tools to handle childhood anxiety.
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Huge help for my anxious children
- By D on 11-04-15
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How the Body Knows Its Mind
- The Surprising Power of the Physical Environment to Influence How You Think and Feel
- By: Sian Beilock
- Narrated by: Coleen Marlo
- Length: 6 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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An award-winning scientist offers a groundbreaking new understanding of the mind-body connection and its profound impact on everything from advertising to romance. The human body is not just a passive device carrying out messages sent by the brain but rather an integral part of how we think and make decisions.
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The New Science Of The Mind Body Connection!
- By Dianne on 04-06-15
By: Sian Beilock
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Great parenting advice!
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Become the parent your kid thinks you are
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Today millions of kids are stuck in a world that doesn't respect, support, or embrace who they really are - these are what Deborah Reber is calling the “differently wired” kids, the one in five children with ADHD, dyslexia, Asperger’s, and other neurodifferences. Their challenges are many. But now there’s hope. Written by Deborah Reber, a best-selling author and mother in the midst of an eye-opening journey with her son who is twice exceptional (he has ADHD, Asperger’s, and is highly gifted), Differently Wired is a how-to, a manifesto, a book of wise advice, and more.
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ADHD Raising an Explosive Child with a Fast Mind
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ADHD can be a hefty pain to deal with, especially for a child. At this point, they aren’t aware that their outbursts are causing others harm or that their hyperactivity might be harming themselves. They are acting out of instinct because that is all they know. As their parent, it is your job to lift them up and show them the way. If they have low self-esteem, you need to push them up. If they lack focus, you need to guide them to find it. With effective strategies, you can implement in your daily lives, managing ADHD can be achievable.
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Interesting thoughts
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Parenting and neuroscience expert Robyn Gobbel is here to reveal how all behavior, no matter how baffling, can be explained and remedied. You just need to look past the behavior and understand what's going on inside. Robyn decodes the latest brain science into easy-to-understand principles and metaphors to help you become an expert in your child's behavior. She reveals simple ways to help you regulate and connect with your child, with brain-, body- and sensory-based strategies to overcome day-to-day challenges.
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Real World Application
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An Excellent Book about Gifted Kids with Disabilities
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Low-demand parenting allows you to drop the demands and expectations that are making family life impossible and embrace the joyful freedom of living life with low demands. It can be a particularly effective approach for children with high anxiety levels including neurodivergent children. Parent to neurodivergent children and autistic adult Amanda Diekman outlines a parenting approach that finally lowers the bar for the whole family, enabling the equilibrium of the home to be restored.
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Amazing resource! Shoulda been narrated by author
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The Yes Brain
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When facing contentious issues such as screen time, food choices, and bedtime, children often act out or shut down, responding with reactivity instead of receptivity. This is what New York Times best-selling authors Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson call a No Brain response. But our kids can be taught to approach life with openness and curiosity. When kids work from a Yes Brain, they’re more willing to take chances and explore. They’re more curious and imaginative. They’re better at relationships and handling adversity.
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Where is the PDF
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The PDA Paradox
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A great resource for PDAers & their loved ones
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Parenting a Child Who Has Intense Emotions
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Temper tantrums in the supermarket. Tears that seem to come out of nowhere. Battles over homework that are more like wars. When your child has problems regulating his or her emotions, there's no hiding it. Children with intense emotions go from zero to 100 in seconds and are prone to frequent emotional and behavioral outbursts that leave parents feeling bewildered and helpless. Other parents may have told you that it's just a phase or that your child needs discipline.
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take notes.
- By happilynappy on 02-23-16
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Food: A Cultural Culinary History
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- Narrated by: Ken Albala
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- Original Recording
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Eating is an indispensable human activity. As a result, whether we realize it or not, the drive to obtain food has been a major catalyst across all of history, from prehistoric times to the present. Epicure Jean-Anthelme Brillat-Savarin said it best: "Gastronomy governs the whole life of man."
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One of my top 3 favorite courses!
- By Jessica on 12-28-13
By: Ken Albala, and others
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Powerful Teaching
- Unleash the Science of Learning
- By: Pooja K. Agarwal, Patrice Bain
- Narrated by: Coleen Marlo
- Length: 8 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Powerful Teaching: Unleash the Science of Learning empowers educators to harness rigorous research on how students learn and unleash it in their classrooms. Drawing on a 15-year scientist-teacher collaboration, more than 100 years of research on learning, and rich experiences from educators in K-12 and higher education, the authors present highly accessible step-by-step guidance on how to transform teaching with four essential strategies: Retrieval practice, spacing, interleaving, and feedback-driven metacognition.
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Best for practical advice on retrieval practice
- By Nathan Parker on 10-14-20
By: Pooja K. Agarwal, and others
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NeuroTribes
- The Legacy of Autism and the Future of Neurodiversity
- By: Steve Silberman
- Narrated by: William Hughes
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What is autism: a lifelong disability or a naturally occurring form of cognitive difference akin to certain forms of genius? In truth, it is both of these things and more - and the future of our society depends on our understanding it. Wired reporter Steve Silberman unearths the secret history of autism, long suppressed by the same clinicians who became famous for discovering it, and finds surprising answers to the crucial question of why the number of diagnoses has soared in recent years.
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The long hard road to proper identity on the Autistic spectrum.
- By Lorijorn on 10-29-15
By: Steve Silberman
What listeners say about Self-Reg
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Matt
- 01-16-22
Best book on belong yourself and your children.
This was one of the most informative and helpful audiobooks that I have listened to. I have been a practicing therapist for over 20 years and I listen to and read 10-15 therapy related books each year. This book has helped me to look at therapy and human needs (my clients AND my own) in a very different manner. I recommend it for everyone but especially anyone in the helping or teaching professions as well as anyone with their own children.
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- KTinNYC
- 04-26-17
Illuminating
This book really helped me understand some of my child's behaviors, and better yet what to do about them. I do wish the action steps provided were a little more robust, but just understanding my role better will, I think, be immensely helpful for both of us.
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- L. Currey
- 11-14-18
Lens changing look at your kids and self
The information conveyed in this story has been a game changer as a parent. It has helped me view my children's behavior through an entirely different lens and has helped us through the ups and downs of parenting. I highly recommend this read for parents and educators. #Parentingtips #Lenschange #Forthekids #Tagsgiving #Sweepstakes
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- Firecracker
- 01-25-19
Loved it!
This will help me so much in so many ways! Best book ever! I can't wait to tell others!
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- Prime Member
- 02-28-24
Excellent Read!
for all those parents who have kids with ADHD, this is a must read. I would also encourage those adult who have issues with self regulating for whatever reason to read the book as well. 
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- Martha
- 03-22-19
A must read for anyone raising or working with children
As a psychotherapist, this is one of the most important books I’ve read to date. It has helped me reframe so much of the volatile behavior I’ve seen in children, parents and couples, and enabled me to reformulate my approach.
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- ME Mom
- 08-03-20
Great awareness
I loved the awareness this book gives for self reg. So many good insights but I kept hoping it would get around to more clearly listing the steps of what to do and how to do it. Perhaps this is because it is so personalized. But I Feel like it made you think you needed a counselor to walk you through implementing this rather than teaching you how to implement it yourself. Overall it was great to see my children with a different lens. Thank you!
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- Elishema Fishman
- 09-15-21
good info but boring
the book has good information, but the book is very boring. it also seems like he could more explicitly call out what the actual steps for self reg are. he does say what they are early on, but if you blink you might miss them
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- Lori M.
- 12-14-21
But what is it?
There are some fantastic insights here, but after listening to the book, I still had no clue what the 5 steps to “self reg” actually were …
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- Tina Ball
- 10-21-19
A must for parents and teachers
A balance of Leading Edge science, psychology and heart centered parenting. The author puts in just enough examples from real life. The part about adolescence and self care was especially meaningful.
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