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The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo
- Narrated by: Amy Schumer
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
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Publisher's summary
"Amy's got your back. She's in your corner. She's an honesty bomb. And she's coming for you." (Actress Tilda Swinton, Trainwreck costar)
2017 Audie Award Finalist for Audiobook of the Year and Narration by the Author
The Emmy Award-winning comedian, actress, writer, and star of Inside Amy Schumer and the acclaimed film Trainwreck has taken the entertainment world by storm with her winning blend of smart, satirical humor. Now Amy Schumer has written a refreshingly candid and uproariously funny collection of (extremely) personal and observational essays.
In The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo, Amy mines her past for stories about her teenage years, her family, relationships, and sex and shares the experiences that have shaped who she is - a woman with the courage to bare her soul to stand up for what she believes in, all while making us laugh. Down to earth and relatable, frank and unapologetic, Amy Schumer is one of us: She relies on her sister for advice, still hangs out with her high school pals, and continues to navigate the ever-changing boundaries in love, work, and life.
Ranging from the raucous to the romantic, the heartfelt to the harrowing, this highly entertaining and universally appealing collection is the literary equivalent of a night out with your best friend - an unforgettable and fun adventure that you wish could last forever. Whether she's experiencing lust at first sight while in the airport security line, sharing her own views on love and marriage, admitting to being an introvert, or discovering her cross-fit instructor's secret bad habit, Amy Schumer proves to be a bighearted, brave, and thoughtful storyteller that will leave you nodding your head in recognition, laughing out loud, and sobbing uncontrollably - but only because it's over.
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"You'll change your mind." That's what everyone says to Jen Kirkman - and countless women like her - when she confesses she doesn't plan to have children. But you know what? It's hard enough to be an adult. You have to dress yourself and pay bills and remember to buy birthday gifts. You have to drive and get annual physicals and tip for good service. Some adults take on the added burden of caring for a tiny human being with no language skills or bladder control.
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Funny. Not fall down laughing funny, but funny
- By david on 05-22-13
By: Jen Kirkman
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I Like You Just the Way I Am
- Stories About Me and Some Other People
- By: Jenny Mollen
- Narrated by: Jenny Mollen
- Length: 7 hrs
- Unabridged
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Jenny Mollen is an actress and writer living in Los Angeles. She is also a wife, married to a famous guy (which is annoying only because he gets free shit and she doesn't). She doesn't want much from life. Just to be loved - by everybody: her parents, her dogs, her ex-boyfriends, her ex-boyfriends' dogs, her husband, her husband's ex-girlfriends, her husband's ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends, etc.
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Hmm...Why am I listening to a bio of Jenny Mollen?
- By Elisabeth W. on 09-16-15
By: Jenny Mollen
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Wildflower
- By: Drew Barrymore
- Narrated by: Drew Barrymore
- Length: 7 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Wildflower is a portrait of Drew's life in stories as she looks back on the adventures, challenges, and incredible experiences of her earlier years. It includes tales of living on her own at 14 (and how laundry may have saved her life), getting stuck in a gas station overhang on a cross-country road trip, saying good-bye to her father in a way only he could have understood, and many more adventures and lessons that have led her to the successful, happy, and healthy place she is today.
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Hold the shrieking !
- By Dawne on 11-27-15
By: Drew Barrymore
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My Inappropriate Life
- Some Material Not Suitable for Small Children, Nuns, or Mature Adults
- By: Heather McDonald
- Narrated by: Heather McDonald
- Length: 5 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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In her hilarious New York Times best seller You’ll Never Blue Ball in This Town Again, Heather McDonald recounted her adventures as an unwilling virgin in Hollywood. Now happily married with three wonderful kids, she shows that life as a grown-up - even a pretend grown-up - has its challenges. Heather’s a working mom with parents who live next door, a sister who keeps asking for one of her still-fertile eggs, and friends who are up to more hijinks than even Heather can handle.
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Irritating
- By TrishS on 04-23-13
By: Heather McDonald
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I Don’t Care about Your Band
- What I Learned from Indie Rockers, Trust Funders, Pornographers, Felons, Faux-Sensitive Hipsters, and Other Guys I’ve Dated
- By: Julie Klausner
- Narrated by: Julie Klausner
- Length: 6 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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In the tradition of Cynthia Heimel and Chelsea Handler, and with the boisterous iconoclasm of Amy Sedaris, Julie Klausner's candid and funny debut I Don't Care about Your Band sheds light on the humiliations we endure to find love - and the lessons that can be culled from the wreckage. I Don't Care about Your Band posits that lately the worst guys to date are the ones who seem sensitive. It's the jerks in nice guy clothing, not the players in Ed Hardy, who break the hearts of modern girls.
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Shopping for Men at the Wrong Mall
- By Pamela Harvey on 01-02-13
By: Julie Klausner
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Fat Girl Walking
- Sex, Food, Love, and Being Comfortable in Your Skin...Every Inch of It
- By: Brittany Gibbons
- Narrated by: Lauren Fortgang
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Fat Girl Walking is a collection of stories from my life, my thoughts about the issues that I have faced as a woman, wife, mom, daughter, daughter-in-law, and Internet personality in regards to my weight. I have tried to be as honest as I possibly could - apologies in advance to my husband and parents, but hopefully any discomfort you feel is quickly replaced by laughter.
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One Woman's Body; One Woman's Story
- By Meghan Matt on 06-03-15
By: Brittany Gibbons
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In the Water They Can't See You Cry
- A Memoir
- By: Amanda Beard, Rebecca Paley
- Narrated by: Tavia Gilbert
- Length: 8 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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At the tender age of 14, Amanda Beard walked onto the pool deck at the Atlanta Olympics carrying her teddy bear, Harold, and left with two silvers and a gold medal. She competed in three more Olympic games, winning a total of seven medals, and enjoyed a lucrative modeling career on the side. At one point, she was the most downloaded female athlete on the Internet. Yet despite her astonishing career and sex-symbol status, Amanda felt unworthy of all her success. Unaware that she was suffering from clinical depression, she hid the pain beneath a megawatt smile.
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I applaud Amanda - but her editor's were lame
- By Heather on 03-10-15
By: Amanda Beard, and others
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I Hate Everyone, Except You
- By: Clinton Kelly
- Narrated by: Clinton Kelly
- Length: 4 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Clinton Kelly is probably best known for teaching women how to make their butts look smaller. But in I Hate Everyone, Except You, he reveals some heretofore unknown secrets about himself, like that he's a finicky connoisseur of 1980s pornography, a disillusioned critic of New Jersey's premier water parks, and perhaps the world's least enthused high school commencement speaker.
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Filthy language overshadowed stories
- By Doris on 04-29-17
By: Clinton Kelly
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White Girl Problems
- By: Babe Walker
- Narrated by: Tavia Gilbert
- Length: 6 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Babe Walker, center of the universe, is a painstakingly manicured white girl with an expensive smoothie habit, a proclivity for Louboutins, a mysterious mother she's never met, and approximately 50 bajillion Twitter followers. But her "problems" have landed her in shopping rehab - that's what happens when you spend $246,893.50 in one afternoon at Barneys. Now she's decided to write her memoir, revealing the gut-wrenching hurdles she's had to overcome in order to be perfect in every way, every day.
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Hysterical
- By Kimberlykate on 02-01-13
By: Babe Walker
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#IMomSoHard
- By: Kristin Hensley, Jen Smedley
- Narrated by: Kristin Hensley, Jen Smedley
- Length: 7 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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In their highly anticipated first audiobook, the hilarious mom duo with millions of followers explores all the ridiculous shit you’re expected to do to keep multiple humans alive and happy-ish and celebrates the love for the friends who get you through it.
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IRelateSoHard
- By Peekablue on 04-20-19
By: Kristin Hensley, and others
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She Memes Well
- By: Quinta Brunson
- Narrated by: Quinta Brunson
- Length: 8 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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From comedian Quinta Brunson (creator and star of Abbott Elementary) comes a deeply personal and funny collection of essays about trying to make it when you're struggling, the importance of staying true to your roots, and how she's redefined humor online. In her debut essay collection, Quinta applies her trademark humor and heart to discuss what it was like to go from a girl who loved the World Wide Web to a girl whose face launched a thousand memes. This special Audible edition includes never-before-heard details about the making of Abbott Elementary.
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That moment you know you’re a TEACHER…
- By chrissybrown on 09-19-22
By: Quinta Brunson
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Lighthearted... yet predictable and clichéd
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Mindy Kaling has lived many lives: the obedient child of immigrant professionals, a timid chubster afraid of her own bike, a Ben Affleck–impersonating Off-Broadway performer and playwright, and, finally, a comedy writer and actress prone to starting fights with her friends and coworkers with the sentence “Can I just say one last thing about this, and then I swear I’ll shut up about it?”
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Reese Witherspoon’s grandmother Dorothea always said a combination of beauty and strength made Southern women “whiskey in a teacup”. We may be delicate and ornamental on the outside, she said, but inside, we’re strong and fiery. Reese’s Southern heritage informs her whole life, and she loves sharing the joys of Southern living with practically everyone she meets. She takes the South wherever she goes with bluegrass, big holiday parties, and plenty of Dorothea’s fried chicken.
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sad to even be writing this review :(
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If there’s one trait that makes someone well-suited to comedy, it’s being able to take a punch - metaphorically and, occasionally, physically. Told with a healthy dose of self-deprecation, A Very Punchable Face reveals the brilliant mind behind some of the dumbest sketches on television, and lays bare the heart and humor of a hardworking guy - with a face you can’t help but want to punch.
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Amazing
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All Things Aside
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All Things Aside is a punchy, honest, incisive book that shares a view of the world through the eyes of the inimitable Iliza Shlesinger. From the macro to micro, Shlesinger tackles it all with her no-bullshit comedic style. Throughout the book, Shlesinger dives from one subject into the next, making her hilarious asides the basis of her stories, much like she does in her stand-up comedy. Topics range from dissecting social expectations to the notion that products marketed specifically to women are scams, and all manner of things in between.
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For people younger than me
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Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang
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Life doesn't get more hilarious than when Chelsea Handler takes aim with her irreverent wit. Who else would send all-staff emails to smoke out the dumbest people on her show? Now, in this new collection of original essays, the number-one best-selling author of Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea delivers one laugh-out-loud moment after another as she sets her sights on the ridiculous side of childhood, adulthood, and daughterhood.
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Lmao
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Girl Walks into a Bar...
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Anyone who saw an episode of Saturday Night Live between 1999 and 2006 knows Rachel Dratch. She was hilarious! So what happened to her? After a misbegotten part as Jenna on the pilot of 30 Rock, Dratch was only getting offered roles as "Lesbians. Secretaries. Sometimes secretaries who are lesbians." Her career at a low point, Dratch suddenly had time for yoga, dog- sitting, learning Spanish - and dating. After all, what did a forty-something single woman living in New York have to lose?
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Flowing comedic reality
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Hold the shrieking !
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If You Ask Me
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It-girl Betty White delivers a hilarious, slyly profound take on love, life, celebrity, and everything in between. Drawing from a lifetime of lessons learned, seven-time Emmy winner Betty White's wit and wisdom take center stage as she tackles topics like friendship, romantic love, aging, television, fans, love for animals, and the brave new world of celebrity. If You Ask Me mixes her thoughtful observations with humorous stories from a seven- decade career in Hollywood. Longtime fans and new fans alike will relish Betty's candid take on everything....
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I'd ask Betty!
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By: Betty White
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Dad Is Fat
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Overall
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In Dad is Fat, stand-up comedian Jim Gaffigan, who’s best known for his legendary riffs on Hot Pockets, bacon, manatees, and McDonald's, expresses all the joys and horrors of life with five young children - everything from cousins ("celebrities for little kids") to toddlers’ communication skills ("they always sound like they have traveled by horseback for hours to deliver important news"), to the eating habits of four-year-olds ("there is no difference between a four-year-old eating a taco and throwing a taco on the floor").
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Good for Gaffigan fans - better for expecting dads
- By Sean on 05-17-13
By: Jim Gaffigan
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Girl Logic
- The Genius and the Absurdity
- By: Iliza Shlesinger
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- Length: 5 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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From breakout stand-up comedian Iliza Shlesinger comes a subversively funny collection of essays and observations on a confident woman's approach to friendship, singlehood, and relationships. "Girl Logic" is Iliza's term for the way women obsess over details and situations that men don't necessarily even notice. She describes it as a characteristically female way of thinking that appears to be contradictory and circuitous but is actually a complicated and highly evolved way of looking at the world.
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A delight
- By Haha917 on 03-28-18
By: Iliza Shlesinger
What listeners say about The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Virginia
- 08-18-16
Much deeper than the usual celeb book
Her performance is much more restrained than her stage personality, but I found it very listenable. The story is pretty great. Yes, funny, but there are lots of not-so-funny chapters that I found very moving. Overall, this is the best celebrity book I've read/listened to since Bossypants.
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9 people found this helpful
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- Linda
- 09-06-16
You Gotta Love This Woman
Any additional comments?
She's a brave, deeply funny person, and the humor comes out of a refreshing attitude, unusual in a woman. (Don't shoot me for saying that. It's true. Women get criticized for being as honest and, actually, as crude, as she is.) Here's the problem. She wrote a book. Now she's reading a book. And it SOUNDS like she's reading a book. Good god. This is a woman who does stand up for a living. An actress. At some points she even sounds bored. Someone should have found a way of recording this to make her more lively, and alive. Odd.
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7 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Amazon Customer
- 09-09-16
excellent listen
Amy Schumer, if you read these reviews... I appreciate this book so much. Thank you for writing it and for being so honest. I really try to communicate truth in a funny and peaceful way, although often times in an aggressive way.
I truly enjoyed this book and I'm so glad the author is the narrator. I laughed and I cried, which is ridiculous and funny, because it's true.
highly recommend.
Emily
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6 people found this helpful
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- Ashley
- 10-02-16
So much better than expected
I loved this! I have a new respect for this girl, human just like the rest of us!
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2 people found this helpful
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- Randall Fielding
- 10-02-16
Wonderful!
So funny, so genuine, so vulnerable, so relatable. I adore Amy Schumer, and this book only made me love her more.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Amy L. Jones
- 09-05-16
Thank you, Amy!
The raw honesty and humor in your life stories makes this book a stand-out.
Thank you for sharing this - it hit close to home in all the right places.
Xoxo,
Amy
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2 people found this helpful
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- Heather
- 09-26-16
Weak book with a few good chapters.
I am quite surprised by how weak this book was. While part of me wants to be very frustrated with her, I believe she was given little direction in writing this book. There is no specific theme to the book and too much repetition on the same subjects. She states at the beginning that this book is not a memoir but, honestly, I can't figure out what it is supposed to be. I really enjoyed her show as it was creative and funny. While I realize that these books are not meant to be funny the whole time, I didn't laugh once. I think at times she tried to be funny but it mostly fell flat. Most of the book she isn't trying to make you laugh, so no miss there.
Most of the book is about her life growing up, her messy family situation, dating stories, some about how she rose to fame, and then random stuff about her. The weirdest sections are her views on gun control and what she wants at her funeral. All in all, the repetition comes in the family stories and dating stories. In my opinion, these are the only parts of the book worth reading. That said, most covers the same ideas and therefore cover too many chapters.
What I did appreciate most was her telling about her involvement in abusive relationships. It is so easy for women to assume that only weak/submissive women end up in these situations. While we experience these relationships on different ranges of abuse (physical, emotional, verbal), anyone can end up the target. Listening to her accounts was hard, but I appreciate her speaking up so much.
I also appreciated her writing about her father's struggle with M.S. I think many of us don't know much about it and appreciated the honestly she showed.
All in all, I can't recommend this book. I think, if you're looking for smarter and funnier viewpoints on being a single dating girl, Mindy Kalings books are great.
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- Larissa
- 10-11-16
So not funny!!!
I was expecting to LOL at this, instead I fell asleep! If you are looking for a Chelseas Handler type read, then go get one of her books, this is not it:(
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- Tiffany
- 12-12-16
Best Audible purchase to date
Best Audible purchase I've made. You aren't going to laugh the entire time, but when you aren't laughing you'll realize how real and amazing Amy is. Yeah, she's a rich bitch, but she's a real bitch! She isn't perfect and doesn't have a perfect life which makes her , Gid forbid, a real person and incredibly relatable. She's sincere, kind, passionate, intelligent, beautiful and yes, funny. I already loved her for her no apologies attitude but after this book there is a level of admiration for all she is and stands for.
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- Karly
- 11-08-16
Good, easy listening.
It's good to know that people in the public eye are still in touch with reality and conscious of the world we live in.
Enlightening and insite full with the perfect amount of humor. Loved.
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