The Naked Clone
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The Naked Clone
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Narrated by:
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Conor Lastowka
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Michael J. Nelson
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Kevin Murphy
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Bill Corbett
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Sean Thomason
About this listen
This hilarious mystery was written serially by the minds behind RiffTrax, with each writer picking up where the last left off.
There’s trouble in Hollywood. Big surprise, Sheepdip, there’s always trouble in Hollywood. But for Yours Truly, Nick Nolte, private dick, actor, entrepreneur, collector of exotic and often dangerous commodities, and People magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive (1992), Hollywood is a filthy, decaying, half-empty swimming pool, and I’m gonna dive in head-first. Someone’s kidnapping Hollywood bigwigs? Hell, I wish I’d thought of it first. Clones runnin’ amok from Pismo to Tijuana?
Sounds like fun, hand me a gun. A dame in distress willing to hire me for a sack a’ quarters? I’m in. I’ll even put on my best shirt for the job, which is easy, ’cause it’s my only shirt. A diabolical plot to mess with the space-time continuum and take over Tinseltown, maybe the whole damn world? I’m on the case. I might get distracted, or black out a few times, or both, but I won’t stop till I bring in these evil peckerknobs and win the heart of the femme fatale……Sorry, blacked out there for a minute. Maybe an hour. Maybe a day—look, who’s counting?
So strap in, Shortpants, it’ll be one full-throttle, mind-twisting, weirdass ride, and I got the wheel. Just hand me that bag a’ pills and that can a’ Sterno and try not to scream so damn much.
—Your Pal, Nick
©2023 Conor Lastowka, Michael J. Nelson, Kevin Murphy, Bill Corbett, & Sean Thomason (P)2024 Conor Lastowka, Michael J. Nelson, Kevin Murphy, Bill Corbett, & Sean ThomasonRelated to this topic
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A bad best man’s speech can ruin a wedding. Why do we plan every detail of a perfect day and then give the groom’s idiot best friend five minutes of total power? Enter Nate (Glen Powell), a speechwriter-for-hire who helps people write incredible best man speeches. To keep the best man from embarrassing himself (and the newlyweds), Nate uses his list of don’ts: Don’t mention the exes, don’t be rated R, and don’t bum everyone out. Nate’s system never fails. That is, until he meets Dan (Nicholas Braun).
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The Answer Is No
- A Short Story
- By: Fredrik Backman, Elizabeth DeNoma - translator
- Narrated by: Stacy Gonzalez
- Length: 1 hr and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 1,142
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 1,076
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Story4 out of 5 stars 1,076
Lucas knows the perfect night entails just three things: video games, wine, and pad thai. Peanuts are a must! Other people? Not so much. Why complicate things when he’s happy alone? Then one day the apartment board, a vexing trio of authority, rings his doorbell. And Lucas’s solitude takes a startling hike. They demand to see his frying pan. Someone left one next to the recycling room overnight, and instead of removing the errant object, as Lucas suggests, they insist on finding the guilty party. But their plan backfires. Colossally.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Narrator doesn’t get Backman’s satire or rhythm
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By: Fredrik Backman, and others
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Born a Crime
- Stories from a South African Childhood
- By: Trevor Noah
- Narrated by: Trevor Noah
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 216,055
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 195,459
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Story5 out of 5 stars 194,491
In this award-winning Audible Studios production, Trevor Noah tells his wild coming-of-age tale during the twilight of apartheid in South Africa. It’s a story that begins with his mother throwing him from a moving van to save him from a potentially fatal dispute with gangsters, then follows the budding comedian’s path to self-discovery through episodes both poignant and comical.
-
5 out of 5 stars
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Great book and perfect narration
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By: Trevor Noah
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Slaughterhouse-Five
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: James Franco
- Length: 5 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 19,232
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 17,185
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 17,160
Traumatized by the bombing of Dresden at the time he had been imprisoned, Pilgrim drifts through all events and history, sometimes deeply implicated, sometimes a witness. He is surrounded by Vonnegut's usual large cast of continuing characters (notably here the hack science fiction writer Kilgore Trout and the alien Tralfamadorians, who oversee his life and remind him constantly that there is no causation, no order, no motive to existence).
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Don't Quit Your Daytime Job, James
- By Keith on 11-20-15
By: Kurt Vonnegut
-
Stranded
- By: Chris Bruno, David Howard Lee, Shukri R. Abdi
- Narrated by: Taraji P. Henson, Tracee Ellis Ross, Blake Griffin, and others
- Length: 2 hrs and 7 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 3,033
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 2,979
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 2,979
Separated by 10 years, 3,000 miles, and the unrelenting stresses of adulthood, best friends Janet and Serena plan a 40th birthday girls’ trip to reconnect. But after a massive crash, they’re the only survivors to wash ashore on an uncharted Caribbean Island. Armed with only the clothes on their backs and zero survival skills, they fight to overcome hunger, thirst, deadly wildlife—and most terrifyingly—decades of accrued resentment. Can they find their way home, or will they kill each other first?
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- By Lasheree McFarlane on 11-08-24
By: Chris Bruno, and others
-
Mel & Sue: Should Know By Now
- By: Mel Giedroyc, Sue Perkins
- Narrated by: Mel Giedroyc, Sue Perkins
- Length: 3 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 60
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 59
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Story5 out of 5 stars 59
We all have things in our life that we should know by now, but don’t. Absences in our knowledge and skillset that are frankly shameful in an adult. Things that would be too embarrassing to ask anyone to explain – except our very best friend. Listen in as Mel and Sue tackle their ignorance head on, asking each other to explain something that they still don’t know - but absolutely, as adults, should - from how to parallel park to fully understanding bread (why has it got all those holes in it? What, honestly, is yeast?).
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Great fun
- By STEPHANIE on 03-29-25
By: Mel Giedroyc, and others
-
The Best Man's Ghostwriter
- By: Matthew Starr
- Narrated by: Glen Powell, Nicholas Braun, Ashley Park, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 37 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 2,044
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 1,984
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,984
A bad best man’s speech can ruin a wedding. Why do we plan every detail of a perfect day and then give the groom’s idiot best friend five minutes of total power? Enter Nate (Glen Powell), a speechwriter-for-hire who helps people write incredible best man speeches. To keep the best man from embarrassing himself (and the newlyweds), Nate uses his list of don’ts: Don’t mention the exes, don’t be rated R, and don’t bum everyone out. Nate’s system never fails. That is, until he meets Dan (Nicholas Braun).
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
SO GOOD
- By Csutty on 09-23-24
By: Matthew Starr
What listeners say about The Naked Clone
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Kathleen reed
- 09-03-24
funny
the reading was excellent- usually the narrators suck in the audible reads. Hopefully, you'll get better narrators
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- MoebabF
- 02-11-25
So there I was
“Rootin round the old Audible store for something that wasn”t about Ufos in the jungle or workin fer greasy treanch coats.
I got paid in greasy trenchoats! Sold ‘em down by the old tatoo parlor,next to that lazer tag place where that Filipino kid lost a pinkie.”
Anyways, If you like these guys already that’s
why you’re here,
Buy the book, laughed my ass off!
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Overall2 out of 5 stars
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Performance3 out of 5 stars
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Story2 out of 5 stars
- Jukilum
- 08-25-24
Somewhat amusing
There were some amusing parts. The story moves really slowly as it gets bogged down in endless asides that are meant to be humorous. For me that humor was successful only some of the time.
There were a lot of references to various RiffTrax movies and shorts. Listener’s enjoyment will probably be limited without an extensive knowledge of the RiffTrax catalog.
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