Wedding Toasts I'll Never Give
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Wedding Toasts I'll Never Give
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Narrated by:
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Ada Calhoun
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By:
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Ada Calhoun
About this listen
Inspired by her wildly popular New York Times essay "The Wedding Toast I'll Never Give", Ada Calhoun provides a funny (but not flip), smart (but not smug) take on the institution of marriage. Weaving intimate moments from her own married life with frank insight from experts, clergy, and friends, she upends expectations of total marital bliss to present a realistic - but ultimately optimistic - portrait of what marriage is really like. There will be fights, there will be existential angst, there may even be affairs; sometimes you'll look at the person you love and feel nothing but rage. Despite it all, Calhoun contends, staying married is easy: Just don't get divorced.
Wedding Toasts I'll Never Give offers bracing straight talk to the newly married and honors those who have weathered the storm. This exploration of modern marriage is at once wise and entertaining, a work of unexpected candor and literary grace.
©2017 Ada Calhoun (P)2017 HighBridge, a division of Recorded BooksListeners also enjoyed...
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- Candid Conversation About Grief. Beginners Welcome.
- By: Rebecca Soffer, Gabrielle Birkner
- Narrated by: Meredith Mitchell, Josh Bloomberg
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 44
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 40
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 40
At a time when we mourn public figures and national tragedies with hashtags, where intimate posts about loss go viral and we receive automated birthday reminders for dead friends, it's clear we are navigating new terrain without a road map. Let's face it: Most of us have always had a difficult time talking about death and sharing our grief. We're awkward and uncertain; we avoid, ignore, or even deny feelings of sadness; we offer platitudes; we send sympathy bouquets whittled out of fruit.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Not What I Was Expecting
- By Bessie Mae on 03-01-23
By: Rebecca Soffer, and others
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If It's Not One Thing, It's Your Mother
- By: Julia Sweeney
- Narrated by: Julia Sweeney
- Length: 6 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 196
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 176
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Story4 out of 5 stars 175
Since her time on Saturday Night Live, where she created the infamous androgynous character "Pat", Julia Sweeney has gone on to establish herself as a witty, captivating performer of one-woman shows, like God Said Ha!, In the Family Way, and Letting Go of God. She gave a TED talk sharing how she explained the birds and the bees to her eight-year-old daughter, Mulan, which ignited an incredible response. Now, when it comes to talking about motherhood, people want to hear what Julia has to say.
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4 out of 5 stars
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I Love Julia Sweeney
- By Lisa on 04-05-13
By: Julia Sweeney
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My Life with Bob
- Flawed Heroine Keeps Book of Books, Plot Ensues
- By: Pamela Paul
- Narrated by: Eileen Stevens, Pamela Paul
- Length: 6 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 69
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 63
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Story4 out of 5 stars 63
Pamela Paul has kept a single book by her side for 28 years - carried throughout high school and college, hauled from Paris to London to Thailand, from job to job, safely packed away and then carefully removed from apartment to house to its current perch on a shelf over her desk - reliable if frayed, anonymous-looking yet deeply personal. This book has a name: Bob. Bob is Paul's Book of Books, a journal that records every book she's ever read.
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5 out of 5 stars
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An uncanny mirror and a celebration of book love
- By Cherilyn Parsons on 07-28-19
By: Pamela Paul
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Selfish, Shallow, and Self-Absorbed
- Sixteen Writers on the Decision Not to Have Kids
- By: Meghan Daum
- Narrated by: Johnny Heller, Jo Anna Perrin
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 172
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 151
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Story4 out of 5 stars 151
One of the main topics of cultural conversation during the last decade was the supposed "fertility crisis" and whether modern women could figure out a way to have it all - a successful, demanding career and the required 2.3 children - before their biological clocks stopped ticking. Now, however, conversation has turned to whether it's necessary to have it all (see Anne-Marie Slaughter) or, perhaps more controversial, whether children are really a requirement for a fulfilling life.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Am I the only sane childfree woman in here?
- By J. Malouin on 09-29-15
By: Meghan Daum
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This Is the Story of a Happy Marriage
- By: Ann Patchett
- Narrated by: Ann Patchett
- Length: 11 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,708
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,527
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,510
Blending literature and memoir, Ann Patchett, author of State of Wonder and Bel Canto examines her deepest commitments: to writing, family, friends, dogs, books, and her husband in This Is the Story of a Happy Marriage. Together, these essays, previously published in The Atlantic, Harper, Vogue, and The Washington Post, form a resonant portrait of a life lived with loyalty and with love.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Entertaining, engrossing, and elucidative essays
- By Bonny on 01-07-14
By: Ann Patchett
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Mother Daughter Me
- A Memoir
- By: Katie Hafner
- Narrated by: Katie Hafner
- Length: 9 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 63
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 55
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 55
The complex, deeply binding relationship between mothers and daughters is brought vividly to life in Katie Hafner's remarkable memoir, an exploration of the year she and her mother, Helen, spent working through, and triumphing over, a lifetime of unresolved emotions. Dreaming of a "year in Provence" with her mother, Katie urges Helen to move to San Francisco to live with her and Zoe, Katie's teenage daughter. Katie and Zoe had become a mother-daughter team, strong enough, Katie thought, to absorb the arrival of a 77-year-old woman set in her ways....
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5 out of 5 stars
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Listen and be swept away!
- By Barbara Quick on 06-02-22
By: Katie Hafner
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Because I Come from a Crazy Family
- The Making of a Psychiatrist
- By: Edward M. Hallowell
- Narrated by: Paul Boehmer
- Length: 13 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 88
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 81
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 80
When Edward M. Hallowell was 11, a voice out of nowhere told him he should become a psychiatrist. A mental health professional of the time would have called this psychosis. But young Edward (Ned) took it in stride, despite not quite knowing what "psychiatrist" meant. With a psychotic father, an alcoholic mother, an abusive stepfather, and two so-called learning disabilities of his own, Ned was accustomed to unpredictable behaviour from those around him and to a mind he felt he couldn't always control.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Love and connection permeates through this book!
- By Steve Steinmetz on 06-29-18
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The Book of Separation
- A Memoir
- By: Tova Mirvis
- Narrated by: Tova Mirvis
- Length: 9 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 106
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 89
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 89
Born and raised in a tight-knit Orthodox Jewish family, Tova Mirvis committed herself to observing the rules and rituals prescribed by this way of life. After all, to observe was to be accepted and to be accepted was to be loved. She married a man from within the fold and quickly began a family. But over the years, her doubts became noisier than her faith, and at age 40 she could no longer breathe in what had become a suffocating existence.
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5 out of 5 stars
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So many parallels
- By Cortney on 01-05-18
By: Tova Mirvis
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What I Was Doing While You Were Breeding
- A Memoir
- By: Kristin Newman
- Narrated by: Kristin Newman
- Length: 7 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,143
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,005
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,005
Kristin Newman spent her 20s and 30s dealing with the stresses of her high-pressure job as a television comedy writer, and the anxieties of watching most of her friends get married and start families while she wrestled with her own fear of both. Not ready to settle down and yet loathe to become a sad-sack single girl, Kristin instead started traveling the world, often alone, for a few months each year, falling madly in love with attractive locals who provided moments of the love she wanted without the cost of the freedom she needed.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Struggled to Finish
- By YITBOS on 11-21-15
By: Kristin Newman
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The Man I Never Met
- A Memoir
- By: Adam Schefter
- Narrated by: Adam Schefter
- Length: 4 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 248
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 214
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 217
On September 11, 2001, Joe Maio went to work in the north tower of the World Trade Center. He never returned, leaving behind a wife, Sharri, and 15-month old son, Devon. Five years later, Sharri remarried, and Devon welcomed a new dad into his life. For thousands, the whole country really, 9/11 is a day of grief. For Adam and Sharri Maio Schefter and their family it’s not just a day of grief, but also hope. This is a story of 9/11, but it’s also the story of 9/12 and all the days after. Life moved on. Pieces were picked up. New dreams were dreamed. The Schefters are the embodiment of that.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Remembering a fallen father thru a family
- By Bob H on 09-07-18
By: Adam Schefter
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Confessions of a Latter-Day Virgin
- A Memoir
- By: Nicole Hardy
- Narrated by: Nicole Hardy
- Length: 10 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 41
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 39
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Story4 out of 5 stars 39
When Nicole Hardy’s eye-opening "Modern Love" column appeared in the New York Times, the response from readers was overwhelming. Hardy’s essay, which exposed the conflict between being true to herself as a woman and remaining true to her Mormon faith, struck a chord with women coast-to-coast. Now in her funny, intimate, and thoughtful memoir, Nicole Hardy explores how she came, at the age of 35, to a crossroads regarding her faith and her identity.
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5 out of 5 stars
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This Book Spoke to Me
- By Allison on 04-08-14
By: Nicole Hardy
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Manhood for Amateurs
- The Pleasures and Regrets of a Husband, Father, and Son
- By: Michael Chabon
- Narrated by: Michael Chabon
- Length: 8 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 240
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 149
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Story4 out of 5 stars 149
As a devoted son, as a passionate husband, and above all as a father, Chabon's memories of childhood, of his parents' marriage and divorce, of moments of painful adolescent comedy and giddy encounters with the popular art and literature of his own youth, are like a theme played by the mad quartet of which he now finds himself co-conductor. At once dazzling, hilarious, and moving, Manhood for Amateurs is destined to become a classic.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Terrible
- By Ken on 10-14-09
By: Michael Chabon
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The Book of Help
- A Memoir in Remedies
- By: Megan Griswold
- Narrated by: Megan Griswold
- Length: 11 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 290
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 255
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 255
A hilarious and heartbreaking memoir-in-remedies by a self-described "professional soul-searcher" that details a journey of self-discovery through more than 160 tonics, seminars, regimens, and transformative therapies. With a voice that is at once intimate and hilarious, Megan captures the openness and honesty necessary for people to take a new path in life. Listeners will open the audiobook with curiosity about all the different healing therapies that Megan tries, but leave with a new understanding of themselves.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Mr. Toad's Wild Ride has some serious competition!
- By Elisa R. Goodman on 02-15-19
By: Megan Griswold
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Americanized
- Rebel Without a Green Card
- By: Sara Saedi
- Narrated by: Lameece Issaq
- Length: 5 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 90
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 80
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 76
At 13, bright-eyed straight-A student Sara Saedi uncovered a terrible family secret: She was breaking the law simply by living in the United States. Only two years old when her parents fled Iran, she didn't learn of her undocumented status until her older sister wanted to apply for an after-school job but couldn't because she didn't have a Social Security number. Fear of deportation kept Sara up at night, but it didn't keep her from being a teenager.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Corny Cheesy
- By Mina00 on 09-06-18
By: Sara Saedi
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Love, InshAllah
- The Secret Love Lives of American Muslim Women
- By: Ayesha Mattu, Nura Maznavi
- Narrated by: Lameece Issaq, Piper Goodeve, Lauren Fortgang, and others
- Length: 9 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 63
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 56
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 56
Romance, dating, sex and - Muslim women? In this groundbreaking collection, 25 American Muslim writers sweep aside stereotypes to share their search for love openly for the first time, showing just how varied the search for love can be - from singles' events and online dating, to college flirtations and arranged marriages, all with a uniquely Muslim twist. These compelling stories of love and romance create an irresistible balance of heart-warming and tantalizing, always revealing and deeply relatable.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Sex, Love, & Feminism, in the Muslim Women's World
- By Susie on 03-06-13
By: Ayesha Mattu, and others
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Committed
- A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage
- By: Elizabeth Gilbert
- Narrated by: Elizabeth Gilbert
- Length: 8 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 2,488
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,722
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,713
At the end of her best-selling memoir Eat, Pray, Love, Elizabeth Gilbert fell in love with Felipe, a Brazilian-born man of Australian citizenship who'd been living in Indonesia when they met. Resettling in America, the couple swore eternal fidelity to each other, but also swore to never, ever, under any circumstances get legally married. But providence intervened one day in the form of the United States government....
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4 out of 5 stars
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Perfect timing
- By Nancy on 01-15-10
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Crazy Time, Revised Edition
- Surviving Divorce and Building a New Life
- By: Abigail Trafford
- Narrated by: Coleen Marlo
- Length: 9 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 53
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 42
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 43
In this intelligent and insightful book, Abigail Trafford charts the emotional journey of a breakup of a marriage, identifying the common phases in the evolution from marriage to separation to divorce, and eventually to a new life. This revised edition includes the most up-to-date research on the personal and economic effects of divorce in adults and children's lives, addresses the special challenges of becoming single again in the age of the Internet, and broadens the experience of divorce to the breakup of all committed relationships.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Better as an additional book
- By Ethan on 09-18-19
By: Abigail Trafford
What listeners say about Wedding Toasts I'll Never Give
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- nate
- 06-06-17
anecdotal observational humorous real marriage
Quick, entertaining, insightful "read". Well and dryly narrated. No holds barred in a approachable way.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Mrs.Chablis
- 08-30-23
Highly recommend!
I just loved this. It reminds me of something Olivia Harrison said in a documentary about George Harrison and their life together. "People ask me, what's the secret to staying married? ... Not getting divorced!" There is something beautiful about honoring your vows, and that's been lost in this day and age when some people will get divorced over a ham sandwich. Ada Calhoun does a lovely job of looking back at the up's and down's of a life spent together.
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- Mike
- 01-23-20
fun, sometimes profound, lackluster performance
Full of surprising insights. Very honest. Sometimes hilarious. Read with a disappointing singsong rhythm, like she was bored with the whole thing.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Sunny
- 04-29-21
Great pre marriage read!
Listened to this book on our vacation drive with my fiancé and really helped put a lot of articulate words to things we were both consciously and unconsciously thinking/feeling. Really brought us closer together.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 09-20-19
Very Necessary
I have an aversion to doing what everyone else is doing. That’s why I’ve never seen Star Wars, The Terminator, or the Die Hard series of movies. It’s why I don’t have purple circle shaped bruises all over my back, or all the hair lasered off my body. And I couldn’t name for you a single song off the Hamilton soundtrack. It’s also why I am only now reading this book. I regret none of those decisions save one. I should have read this very necessary book much sooner. I believe it has saved me from divorce from so much more than my seemingly failing marriage, and brought me back to myself. Thank you for your brutally polite and beautiful honesty, Ada Calhoun. No exclamation point, because I truly mean it. xo
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- K S
- 07-19-22
Excellent!!!
Wonderful reflection on marriage. Highly recommend for all who are married! Funny, insightful, honest. Loved!
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