What Planet Can I Blame This On?
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What Planet Can I Blame This On?
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Narrated by:
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Roisin Rankin
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By:
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Ellie Pilcher
About this listen
The stars are not in position - and Krystal Baker is determined to make them fall in line.
It's Krystal's 29th birthday. This year:
- Her boyfriend finally proposed after six years of dating (only for her to find out he cheated on her for five and a half of them)
- She landed her dream job as a writer at Craze magazine (which swiftly fell into administration)
- She moved into her dream flat overlooking the city (just for the pipes to explode making the place unlivable)
As she mourns everything wrong in her life, her best friend mutters the dreaded words: Saturn Return. The time in a woman's life where Saturn returns to the position it was in on the day of their birth, 29.5 years ago, and, according to legend, everything goes to shit. Krystal has never bought into astrology but maybe it's time to re-evaluate - because if the stars got her into this mess, they can get her out of it. And she only has six months to make things right.
Loaded with crystals, horoscopes, tarot cards and a carefully aligned chakra or two, Krystal's determined to have her life back on track by the time Saturn returns. No longer shall she brand herself a 'human disaster' because this time it's not her fault, it's written in the treacherous stars.
It's Krystal versus the universe in a fight for her future that she's determined to win.
©2021 Ellie Pilcher (P)2021 Hodder & Stoughton LtdListeners also enjoyed...
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Very frustrating heroine, disappointing ending
- By Jennie L. Stumm on 09-23-20
By: Mhairi McFarlane
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Then I Met You
- By: Matt Dunn
- Narrated by: Rachael Beresford, Steve West
- Length: 10 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 80
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 75
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Story4 out of 5 stars 74
Lisa’s dated a series of disastrous men; Simon’s loved and lost the girl of his dreams. She’s hoping fate might intervene in her love life; he’d prefer that it stopped meddling with his. Today, they’re meeting, courtesy of the local paper’s ‘Blind Date’ feature - but while Lisa’s looking for that elusive ‘spark’, Simon’s sure lightning doesn’t strike twice. Will theirs be a love that’s written in the stars, or merely another mismatch written up in the Gazette?
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4 out of 5 stars
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Not what I was expecting…
- By lfint on 05-25-24
By: Matt Dunn
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In at the Deep End
- By: Kate Davies
- Narrated by: Nicola Barber
- Length: 11 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 70
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 61
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Story4 out of 5 stars 61
Julia hasn't had sex in three years. Her roommate has a boyfriend - and their sex noises are audible through the walls, maybe even throughout the neighborhood. Not to mention, she's treading water in a dead-end job, her know-it-all therapist gives her advice she doesn't ask for, and the men she is surrounded by are, to be polite, subpar.
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3 out of 5 stars
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it was ok
- By Carla on 10-16-24
By: Kate Davies
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Stella's Story
- Thrown Away Children, Book 1
- By: Louise Allen
- Narrated by: Melanie Crawley
- Length: 8 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 243
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 230
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Story5 out of 5 stars 230
Named after the lager that christened her at birth, Stella's life is characterised instability and neglect. Her teenage mother abandons her in the first few weeks of her life, and left in the 'care' of her father, she ends up lying deserted in a house with no food, no water, no clothes and no warmth. She eventually lands in the care of foster carer Louise, who is determined to change her life for the better.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Stella
- By Patricia on 12-17-24
By: Louise Allen
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Don't You Forget About Me
- A Novel
- By: Mhairi McFarlane
- Narrated by: Madeline Gould
- Length: 10 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,655
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,489
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,480
If there’s anything worse than being fired from the lousiest restaurant in town, it’s coming home early to find your boyfriend in bed with someone else. Reeling from the humiliation of a double dumping in one day, Georgina takes the next job that comes her way - bartender in a newly opened pub. There’s only one problem: It’s run by the guy she fell in love with years ago. And - make that two problems - he doesn’t remember her. At all. But she has fabulous friends and her signature hot pink fur coat...what more could a girl really need?
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5 out of 5 stars
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Helpful for Sexual Assault Victims
- By Katie Best on 12-05-20
By: Mhairi McFarlane
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The Secret Bridesmaid
- A Novel
- By: Katy Birchall
- Narrated by: Nathalie Buscombe
- Length: 12 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 954
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 866
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 857
As a professional bridesmaid, Sophie is hired by London brides to be their right-hand woman, posing as a friend but working behind the scenes to help plan the perfect wedding and ensure their big day goes off without a hitch. When she’s hired by Lady Victoria Swann - a former model and “It Girl" of 1970’s London; now the Marchioness of Meade - for the society wedding of the year, it should be a chance for Sophie to prove just how talented she is.
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5 out of 5 stars
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The Secret Bridesmaid
- By whatcha.listening.to on 10-05-21
By: Katy Birchall
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Perks of Office
- By: Liz Rain
- Narrated by: Cat Gould
- Length: 6 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 69
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 67
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 67
After high-powered politician Bridget O'Keefe sweeps into the uninspiring life of Australian electorate officer Emma Ives, nothing is the same again. Hapless, hopeless Emma is smacked with an instant crush on the polished woman who's her new boss . . . her hot, untouchable, straight boss. Yes, she knows she's an idiot because unrequited lust at work is a terrible idea. Even so, she can dream.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Too much of a good thing ?? 💕💕💕
- By Libra Lover on 08-07-24
By: Liz Rain
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The Perfect Lie
- By: Karen Osman
- Narrated by: Imogen Church
- Length: 9 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 343
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 313
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Story4 out of 5 stars 311
Claire Carmichael leads a charmed life. She has two beautiful sons, Jamie and Joshua, and a handsome and successful husband who loves her. Even when she was in school, Claire had it all. She was clever, likeable, and after passing the initiation tests, she was welcomed into the society of popular girls - the Queen Bees. So when a scandal threatened to ruin Claire's reputation, the Queen Bees closed rank to protect her, no matter who else got hurt. Claire may have moved on from her school days, but for one person who she hurt irreparably, those memories are as fresh as blood.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Ok but predictable
- By Jenn on 09-29-19
By: Karen Osman
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Lost for Words
- By: Andrea Bramhall
- Narrated by: Rachael Beresford
- Length: 11 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 58
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 51
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 51
Sasha Adams has it all. Fulfilling career, loving family, great friends, and . . . Who's she kidding? She lives at home with her aging mother, Fleur. She works as a massage therapist, and spends all her time with her best friend, Bobbi. But damn it, she's happy. Well, okay, maybe not happy, but she's content. It's enough. Until the well-meaning but meddlesome women in her life, Fleur and Bobbi, team up and enter Sasha into a writing competition with the potential to change her life.
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5 out of 5 stars
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She trusts her readers
- By Anonymous User on 01-02-23
By: Andrea Bramhall
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What Happens Now?
- By: Sophia Money-Coutts
- Narrated by: Sophia Money-Coutts
- Length: 9 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 174
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 154
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Story4 out of 5 stars 154
After eight years together, Lil Bailey thought she’d already found ‘the one’ - that is, until he dumped her for a blonde 20-something colleague. So she does what any self-respecting singleton would do: swipes right, puts on her best bra and finds herself on a first date with a handsome mountaineer called Max. What’s the worst that can happen? Well it’s pretty bad actually. First Max ghosts her and then, after weeing on a stick (but mostly her hands), a few weeks later Lil discovers she’s pregnant.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Good Beach Listen
- By Anonymous User on 06-02-21
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The Flatshare
- A Novel
- By: Beth O'Leary
- Narrated by: Carrie Hope Fletcher, Kwaku Fortune
- Length: 9 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 2,990
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 2,623
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 2,613
Tiffy and Leon share an apartment. Tiffy and Leon have never met. After a bad breakup, Tiffy Moore needs a place to live. Fast. And cheap. But the apartments in her budget have her wondering if astonishingly colored mold on the walls counts as art. Desperation makes her open minded, so she answers an ad for a flatshare. Leon, a night shift worker, will take the apartment during the day, and Tiffy can have it nights and weekends. He'll only ever be there when she's at the office. In fact, they'll never even have to meet.
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3 out of 5 stars
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so much language!!
- By H H on 10-12-19
By: Beth O'Leary
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Maybe This Time
- By: Jill Mansell
- Narrated by: Esther Wane
- Length: 11 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 115
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 104
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 106
When Mimi Huish visits her dad at his new home in the Cotswolds, she immediately falls in love with the eccentric and charming inhabitants of his new community. And when she meets the seriously gorgeous, charismatic Cal Mathieson, Mimi begins to daydream about trading in her city life for country living. But even though Mimi and Cal feel like they might be soul mates, fate (and bad timing) keeps pulling them apart.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Very enjoyable
- By lapiragua on 01-05-20
By: Jill Mansell