What We Carry

A Memoir

By: Maya Shanbhag Lang

Narrated by: Maya Shanbhag Lang

Length: 7 hrs and 16 mins

Publisher's summary

“A gorgeous memoir about mothers, daughters, and the tenacity of the love that grows between what is said and what is left unspoken.” (Mira Jacob, author of Good Talk)

If our family stories shape us, what happens when we learn those stories were never true? Who do we become when we shed our illusions about the past?

Maya Shanbhag Lang grew up idolizing her brilliant mother, an accomplished physician who immigrated to the United States from India and completed her residency all while raising her children and keeping a traditional Indian home. Maya’s mother had always been a source of support - until Maya became a mother herself. Then the parent who had once been so capable and attentive became suddenly and inexplicably unavailable. Struggling to understand this abrupt change while raising her own young child, Maya searches for answers and soon learns that her mother is living with Alzheimer’s.

Unable to remember or keep track of the stories she once told her daughter - stories about her life in India, why she immigrated, and her experience of motherhood - Maya’s mother divulges secrets about her past that force Maya to reexamine their relationship. It becomes clear that Maya never really knew her mother, despite their close bond.

Absorbing, moving, and raw, What We Carry is a memoir about mothers and daughters, lies and truths, receiving and giving care, and how we cannot grow up until we fully understand the people who raised us. It is a beautiful examination of the weight we shoulder as women and an exploration of how to finally set our burdens down.

Praise for What We Carry

"Part self-discovery, part family history.... [Lang's] analysis of the shifting roles of mothers and daughters, particularly through the lens of immigration, help[s] to challenge her family's mythology.... Readers interested in examining their own family stories...will connect deeply with Lang's beautiful memoir." (Library Journal, starred review)

"A stirring memoir exploring the fraught relationships between mothers and daughters...astutely written and intense.... [What We Carry] will strike a chord with readers." (Publishers Weekly)

"Lang is an immediately affable and honest narrator who offers an intriguing blend of revelatory personal history and touching insight." (BookPage)

©2020 Maya Shanbhag Lang (P)2020 Random House Audio

Critic reviews

“What We Carry is an exquisite exploration of the boundlessness and limitations of love that makes us examine the unknowability of who we are and the strength of our bonds with those who shape us. This story is so elegantly told, with such rawness and compassion, that I fell madly in love with Maya Shanbhag Lang and her complicated, unforgettable mother and could not put this book down.” (Lori Gottlieb, New York Times best-selling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone)

“A dazzling, courageous memoir about the weight we carry as women, daughters, and mothers - and what happens when we let go. Lang takes us deep into the heart of her relationship with her mother, a brilliant psychiatrist and Indian immigrant with long-buried secrets. After a health crisis brings mother and daughter under the same roof for the first time since childhood, Lang grapples with new information about the parent she’d idolized, and realizes it's time to tell the story of her own life. What We Carry is a love letter to everyone who has swum through turbulent water before reaching the shores of selfhood.” (Chloe Benjamin, New York Times best-selling author of The Immortalists)

“A profoundly moving memoir about secrets, trauma, and what happens when, for reasons beyond anyone’s control, we can no longer get what we need from those we love, or give them the things they most want from us. In exquisite prose, Maya Shanbhag Lang writes about her extraordinary mother and the cruel circumstances that complicate their relationship. At its heart, this is a book about one of the greatest gifts any parent can give a child: the power to save yourself.” (Will Schwalbe, New York Times best-selling author of The End of Your Life Book Club and Books for Living)

Beautiful story

Beautifully written. Poignant story and so real. Wish she wrote more books. Highly recommend this.

Amazing!

What a great book. I couldn’t stop listening. I laughed and cried, but truly love the connection of mother and daughter. Bravo!!

Beautiful story

It has been a long time since I related so much to one story. Thank you for writing and inspiring others to do the same

Lessons on Motherhood

This book dispenses wisdom on life and motherhood through the vulnerability of its author. Heartbreakingly beautiful & so very important.

An utter delight! Great story very well narrated.

An utter delight! beautifully woven, told, and narrated story. plan to read another novel by this author. Thank you!

A must listen

This book is beautiful. Vulnerable, honest, engaging and beautifully written. I am giving a copy to the women in my life who are mothers or daughters and to anyone who is watching their parents age.

Honest and deep

I loved the book. Author's honest and deep insights are extraordinary. Author describes the meaning beyond the said words in a beuatiful way. Author narrating the story, is a big plus for me.

Fantastic & thought provoking

I could hardly turn this book off! It is so insightful, thought provoking, and culturally interesting. Well performed, too! Highly recommended for all moms and daughters.

Simple but elegant story.

I absolutely love that the author narrated this herself. I honestly don't know how she made it through without crying more often, though... ( I am assuming she had to stop at times.) I know I was moved to tears several times. Beautiful, real, true to life story that was a pleasure to listen to on my day off. Whether I was taking a stroll, lounging about, or doing some household chores, I had this story to keep me company today, and I felt better after hearing it. It seemed to not only allow me a peek into this very personal journey but also challenged me to question the stories about my own journey as well.

couldn't turn off

excellent story. love that it was read by the author with a beautiful accent. Hated for it to end.