Stephen Grochol is a Financial Planner in San Mateo, CA. He and his wife
just celebrated their 20th wedding anniversary and they have two daughters.
He is a post-Baby Scoop and post-Roe v. Wade adoptee. Born in Oakland,
CA in 1974 he is the oldest of three. One brother was adopted and the
youngest was not.

Stephen’s adoptive parents went through a private doctor for this process.
He was relinquished immediately after birth and whisked home to Pacifica
where he grew up. A stroke of luck occurred when his Aunt and
Godmother procured the names of his birth parents during his delivery.
As time went on things within his family unit started to unravel. His younger
brother, also adopted, started suffering mental health issues and was
ultimately diagnosed as schizophrenic and bipolar. The family was
hamstrung by the fact his medical records were sealed by the state of
California. This was the prompt that Stephen needed to start the reunion
process, for real.

His parents were amazingly supportive throughout the entire search for
reunion. This just made things okay. On his 28th birthday, armed with “the
adoption file” he was able to quickly track down his birth father. They have
been in reunion since 2003.

Tracking down his birth mother was a much more difficult task. Two weeks
after he was born the birth parents broke up and she joined a church that
had some “cult-like” qualities. In 2017, Stephen and his birth father used
Ancestry DNA to narrow the search for her. It worked! It’s here where he
met a half-sister on his mother’s side. From there he was able to finally
track down their birth mother on Halloween of all dates.

The reunion with both parents and the siblings has been filled with joy and
happiness. There have been several family reunions where Stephen finally
feels like he’s “wearing the right uniform.” Of course, no reunion is perfect
but we are pretty close.

It’s after all this that Stephen has come out of the fog. Listening to Sarah
and Louise, along with more specialized therapy are major factors for this.
Stephen is quite familiar with fog as he grew up in Pacifica…. One of the
foggiest towns in California. Sunny days lie ahead….

The Girls Who Went Away by Ann Fessler

Exciting News! We will be reading and discussing: You Should Be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identify, and Transracial Adoption by Angela Tucker in Season 9.
Here is a link to order her book: bookshop link.

Magic Mind/ADOPTIONTRIAL: USE CODE: ADOPTEETRIAL
USE THE CODE AND LINK TO: receive a 3-sample pack for free.

RESOURCES for Adoptees
S12F Helping Adoptees
Gregory Luce and Adoptees Rights Law
Joe Soll & other adoptee resources
Fireside Adoptees Facebook Group
Reckoning with the Primal Wound Documentary
Dr. Li

Support the show

To support the show - Patreon.

Jennifer Dyan Ghoston is a same-race domestic foster alum and adoptee in reunion with both sides of her biological family. After a 27-year career in law enforcement with the Chicago Police Department, she retired in 2014 as a police detective. In 2015, she self-published her memoir, "The Truth So Far...a detective's journey to reunite with her birth family". She credits her spiritual journey that started over forty years ago for allowing her path to unfold in unexpected and meaningful ways. In 2021, Jennifer's continued efforts to be open, honest, and public about her lived experience while holding space for other members of the constellation (primarily adoptees) has led to hosting the podcast, "Once Upon A Time...In Adopteeland". She currently co-facilitates the Adoptee Voices Writing Group created by Sara Easterly.

Website to find Jennifer: http://www.jenniferdyanghoston.com
Website to Jennifer's Podcast: www.Onceuponatimeinadopteeland.com

The Girls Who Went Away by Ann Fessler

Exciting News! We will be reading and discussing:You Should Be Grateful: Stories of Race, Identify, and Transracial Adoption by Angela Tucker in Season 9.
Here is a link to order her book: bookshop link.

Magic Mind/ADOPTIONTRIAL: USE CODE: ADOPTEETRIAL
USE THE CODE AND LINK TO: receive a 3-sample pack for free.

RESOURCES for Adoptees
S12F Helping Adoptees
Gregory Luce and Adoptees Rights Law
Joe Soll & other adoptee resources
Fireside Adoptees Facebook Group
Reckoning with the Primal Wound Documentary
Dr. Liz Debetta: Migrating Toward Wholeness Movement
Hiraeth Hope & Healing
Moses Farrow - Trauma therapist and advocate
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline – 1-800-273-8255 OR Dial or Text 988.
Unraveling Adoption with Beth Syverson
Adoptees Connect with Pamela Karanova

Thank you to our Patreons! Join at the $10 level and be part of our monthly Zoom /ADOPTEE CAFE community. This is an adoptee-only space. We do appreciate all of our Patreons. The next meeting is Oct. 19th @ 1pm ET

Support the show

To support the show - Patreon.

Kelly was born in 1970 and grew up in Wichita, Kansas. Her parents divorced before she could remember and she had no contact with her dad. Second oldest of five children, she blended in well enough but noticed some differences. She had reason to believe she was adopted and asked when she was a teenager. Her mother continually said she was not adopted. The physical differences were dismissed as traits that might have come from her absent dad.

Kelly is happily married and has three sons. She is an engineer and a passionate quilter.

Fast forward to 2022, her oldest son was curious about his genetic makeup and took a 23andMe. A niece had previously done 23andMe and shared her results. Kelly was surprised that her absent dad was in the database as well. When her son’s results arrived, the niece was not there nor absent dad. Curiously, there were other relatives that she did not know.

Her mother quickly confessed that Kelly was indeed adopted. The rest of the kids were all biological and her mom intended to take this secret to the grave.
Her mom did not want her “to feel different.”

Reaching out to a relative on 23andMe, as well as the adoption agency, it was only 10 days before Kelly was reunited by phone with her parents. Her parents are still together, married for 50 years, and she has two biological brothers. They had been looking for her for many years. She learned that her dad is an engineer, her mom is a quilter, and many other commonalities.

Kelly describes her story as a fairytale reunion. She has been welcomed into her biological family and they have grown very close. She continues to work on her relationship with her adopted mom, trying to work through her anger and feelings of deception.

The Girls Who Went Away by Ann Fessler

Magic Mind/ADOPTIONTRIAL: USE CODE: ADOPTEETRIAL
USE THE CODE AND LINK TO: receive a 3-sample pack for free.

RESOURCES for Adoptees
S12F Helping Adoptees
Gregory Luce and Adoptees Rights Law
Joe Soll & other adoptee resources
Fireside Adoptees Facebook Group
Reckoning with the Primal Wound Documentary
Dr. Liz Debetta: Migrating Toward Wholeness Movement
Hiraeth Hope & Healing
Moses Farrow
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline – 1-800-273-8255 OR Dial or Text 988.
Unraveling Adoption
Adoptees Connect with Pamela Karanova

Thank you to our Patreons! Join at the $10 level and be part of our monthly Zoom /ADOPTEE CAFE community. This is an adoptee-only space. We do appreciate all of our Patreons. The next meeting is Oct. 19th @ 1pm ET

Support the show

To support the show - Patreon.