Today I'm sharing a live workshops where we dive deep into the very first step of Seen and Heard, the "See" part. And not just seeing the behavior or the chaos or the mess (because let's be honest, our brains love to laser focus on the problem), but actually SEEING our kids. The humans behind the big emotions.

What You'll Learn:

The Stop, Drop & Roll Technique - Yes, just like fire safety, but for parenting fires! When your kid's brain goes haywire and your nervous system starts screaming "EMERGENCY!", this is your go-to move.

• STOP: See the other person (not the problem)
• DROP: Don't react, observe patiently
• ROLL: Relax, open, listen, learn

Why Your "No" is Actually a Gift - Mind blown yet? When your child's thinking has gone offline and they're in full unreasonable mode, your gentle but firm limit becomes the focal point for all that nameless tension they've been carrying. It's like giving them permission to let it ALL out safely.

The Tear Catcher Approach - I start this episode with the most beautiful poem by John Roede. It'sl about what happens when we stop trying to fix and start being present with someone's pain.

Questions to Ask Yourself:

1. Does my child need information or help?
2. Does the task match my child's current ability today?
3. Am I feeling drained and making everything about me?
4. Is this behavior genuinely unreasonable, or am I just triggered?

Visual Learners: If you want to see the Seen and Heard diagram I reference, head to page 155 in my book Connect Method Parenting (you can get it on Amazon). The Stop, Drop & Roll visual is on page 165. You can grab the Kindle version for like a dollar if you want to follow along!

Next Steps: Practice just the "See" part this week. Before you set any limit, before you give any direction, just practice seeing your child as a human having a hard time instead of a problem to be solved.

Trust me, this changes everything.

xoxoAndee

ps- If you could take 30 seconds to leave a review, that would mean the world to me. It's how more parents find this work and start choosing connection over correction.

Join me for the No Yell Workshop, a 2-hour live class where you’ll learn the real reason parents yell and walk away with a customized plan to stop. Happening Sept 25th at noon ET (with replay included)

👉 Save your spot at https://cmp.works/yell

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

Limits That Feel Like Love — Discipline Without the Drama

Discipline doesn’t have to be about power struggles, lectures, or bribes. In fact, when it’s done right, it actually feels like love.

In this episode, I’m breaking down why setting firm limits is one of the most loving things we can do for our kids—and how to do it without all the drama. We’ll talk about:

• Why “no” can be a gift (yep, even when your kid is melting down)
• The difference between control and connection
• How to hold firm without getting pulled into the chaos
• Practical tools (like Stop, Drop, and Roll) you can use the next time things go sideways

Think of this as a reframe on discipline: not punishment, not permissiveness, but loving guidance that helps our kids feel safe, seen, and supported.

So if you’re tired of yelling, threats, or the endless negotiating, this one’s for you.

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

What if I told you that the secret to becoming an unshakeable parent isn't getting your kids to behave better, it's learning to live in complete acceptance of however they show up?! Would you believe me???

Today, we're diving deep into what might be the most radical parenting mindset shift you'll ever make. We're talking about living in acceptance instead of resistance, and why this might just be the wildest flex you can pull as a parent.

What You'll Discover

The Manual Revolution: Why those invisible rule books you've written for your kids (without them knowing) are keeping you stuck in emotional chaos—and how to burn them for good.

Conscious vs. Unconscious Rules: The game-changing difference between setting healthy boundaries and emotionally blackmailing your children into compliance.

The Want vs. Need Framework: How to make requests of your kids without tying your emotional wellbeing to whether they follow through (spoiler: this changes everything).

Emotional Independence: Why taking 100% responsibility for your feelings—regardless of your child's behavior—is the ultimate power move.

Key Takeaways

• Your kids don't have to listen to you—you have to earn that right by creating a relationship where they want to listen
• You can't control anyone else, and trying to manage your child's behavior to feel better will always backfire
• Living in acceptance means staying emotionally regulated no matter what shenanigans your kids are pulling
• Conscious limit-setting comes from a place of service, not from needing your kids to behave so you feel like a good parent
• The fastest way to improve your child's behavior is to stop making their behavior about you

"There is nothing you have to do and no one has to do anything for you. When we think that someone else's behavior controls our emotions, we're setting ourselves up to not only feel bad, but to feel powerless."

Living in acceptance isn't about becoming a pushover parent who lets their kids run wild. It's about becoming so emotionally solid and sturdy that you can set firm, loving limits without your nervous system going haywire when your kids push back.

That's the wildest flex of all.

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

Are you willing to allow people not to like you because you're so committed to being yourself? This episode is for all the people-pleasers who are exhausted from trying to be everyone's favorite. Andy gives you permission to let people not like you and shows you why this is the key to actually liking yourself more.

What You'll Learn:

• Why giving people permission to dislike you is liberating
• The real reason you're desperate to be liked (it's about how you think you'll feel)
• How to stop being "creepy, needy, and graspy" when someone pulls away
• Why some people won't like your "flavor" and why that's normal
• How to model authentic confidence for your kids (especially teenagers)

Key Takeaways:

• "They can't like you enough to make up for you not liking yourself."
• "Having the courage to be disliked is empowering and makes you more confident."
• "If someone doesn't like you, maybe you're just not their flavor, and that's okay."

Perfect For:

• Parents who want their teenagers to like them
• Exhausted people-pleasers ready to break the cycle
• Anyone who's changed themselves to fit in
• Parents wanting to model authentic confidence

The Bottom Line: Being likable is overrated. Liking other people (and yourself) that's where the real magic happens.

"Give people permission to not like you. They already have permission anyway, but you giving it feels so much better."

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

It's 8:30 AM, a jackhammer is going FULL THROTTLE outside my window for the third hour straight, and I'm over here typing about unconditional love.

But that obnoxious jackhammer just gave my entire family the perfect real-time lesson in how our thoughts create our reality. One daughter felt annoyed, my husband felt compassion (because he knows someone who got nerve damage from jackhammer work), and others were pretty neutral about the whole thing.

Same situation. Totally different emotional experiences.

This is unconditional love in action, people.

What You'll Learn In This Episode:

The Michelle Moment: Years ago, my friend Michelle asked the question that changed everything: "So when you say unconditional love, you mean love WITHOUT conditions, right?" (Thank you, Michelle, for getting clarity on that life-changing concept!)

The Cinnamon Roll Effect: You know how my mom's homemade cinnamon rolls would make everyone congregate in the kitchen? That's the kind of magnetic energy we want to put out as parents - unconditional love so strong our kids can practically smell it.

Why We Sabotage Our Own Happiness: We actually choose NOT to feel love sometimes. Wild, right? We decide our kids "don't deserve" our love when they're acting up. But plot twist - you're the only one who experiences your emotions. When you withhold love, you're literally punishing yourself.

The Gym Analogy That'll Blow Your Mind: My daughter's friend Grace has been crushing it at the gym for a year. People literally stop her to comment on her transformation. Meanwhile, my body reflects "a mom of six who likes chocolate." Both are totally valid! But it shows we all have untapped capacity - including for unconditional love.

The Behavioralism Trap: We've been taught that love is a reward and anger is a consequence. But real change happens from the inside out, and the only way to help your child's heart soften is to create an environment where their nervous system feels safe.

The Truth Bomb Section:

• Your child's behavior cannot make you stay frustrated (even though it feels like it can)
• Love is available to you 24/7, regardless of what anyone else is doing
• You can love someone deeply and still set firm boundaries
• The emotion of love benefits YOU first - it's basically the ultimate gift you give yourself

My Challenge For You:

Pick someone in your life who's challenging to love right now. Write down all the conditions you're putting on loving them. Then ask yourself: "What would it feel like to love them no matter what, all the time?"

Try it with yourself. What would unconditional love toward yourself look like?

The Random Love Experiment:

Next time you're out and about, try what I call "random love" (yes, I need a better name for this). Look at strangers and think "I love you" in your head. It sounds weird, feels amazing, and sends more love out into the world. What's not to love about that?

"How we treat ourselves in private is how we will treat others in public."

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

What if I told you that acceptance - the thing you think means "giving up" - actually requires MORE effort than fighting? And what if this one shift could stop your parenting triggers in their tracks?

Hey parents! I'm giving myself high fives over here because this episode is going to blow your mind about what acceptance actually means in connected parenting. If you've been in League with me, you're probably rolling your eyes because I say "accept, accept, accept" ALL the time. But today I'm doing a different spin on acceptance that will challenge everything you think you know.

What You'll Learn:

• Why acceptance is the hardest (and most powerful) parenting tool
• The 3-step process to accept triggering moments "as if you chose them"
• How to stop your nervous system from hijacking your parenting responses
• The counter-intuitive reason fighting your kids' behavior makes it worse

The Acceptance Challenge That Will Change Your Parenting

"Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it." - Eckhart Tolle

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

I’m standing in my kitchen, staring at the mess, kids bickering in the background, and my brain is screaming, “We’re going down!”

You know those moments when you’re about to lose it, when correction mode feels inevitable, and you just want to eject out of the whole parenting gig for five minutes? Yeah, I’ve been there. More times than I can count.

And here’s the wild thing: those are the exact moments when I’ve learned to practice something that used to feel impossible for me, feeling proud of myself.

Not arrogant. Not fake. Not “my kids are perfect angels and I’m crushing it.” I mean the quiet kind of proud, the kind that whispers, “Hey, you stayed calm. You showed up. You tried.”

This episode is the second half of a two-part series. In Episode #176 we talked about regret (ouch). Today we’re swinging to the other end of the spectrum: pride. The good kind. The kind we want to model for our kids so they don’t grow up thinking they have to earn love or validation by being flawless.

Here’s what you’ll hear inside:

• Why pride has been so hard for me (confession: I used to literally gag when my husband read me kind emails from clients).
• How parents in my programs are learning to celebrate themselves in the middle of laundry piles, meltdowns, and messy houses.
• Why feeling proud is not optional fluff — it’s actually a superpower that calms your nervous system and fuels growth.
• A question you can ask yourself today that will help you create the emotion of pride on purpose.

Parenting is full of emergency landings. You’re going to have turbulence, and you’re going to have moments when you’re convinced you’ve lost the plot. But if you can walk away from those moments and still say, “I’m proud of myself for how I showed up” that changes everything.

So let’s talk about how to land the plane safely, even when you feel like you’re about to lose it.

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

I woke up this morning to the most incredible thunderstorm (which got me up way too early, thanks Mother Nature), and instead of being grumpy about it, I had this wild thought: "What if I just recorded that podcast episode I've been marinating on?"

Today we're diving into a concept that literally changed my life which is...

--> It doesn't get any better than this <--

I know, I know. Your brain is probably doing that thing where it's like "EXCUSE ME, ANDEE HAVE YOU SEEN MY LAUNDRY PILE?" But stick with me here, because this isn't some toxic positivity nonsense.

The backstory (because I love a good origin story):

Remember when my go-to thought was "This is happening and it's okay"? I used to literally add "it's okay" to the end of every resistant thought like some kind of nervous system fairy godmother. Kids are fighting... it's okay. Lost my cool again... it's okay.

It was like training wheels for my brain, and honestly? It worked.

But then this new thought showed up five years ago and absolutely WRECKED me (in the best way): It doesn't get better than this.

I don't want you to settle or give up on your dreams of organized closets and children who actually put their dishes in the dishwasher. NOT AT ALL! I want you to hold on to those dreams and lean into this, because it's gonna change your life.

Your capacity for happiness has absolutely nothing to do with external circumstances!!

That joy you're waiting for, when the house is clean, when bedtime is smooth, when you finally stop losing your cool. It's available RIGHT NOW!!!

I spent years thinking tomorrow would be better than today. That when my kids were "better behaved" or when I was a "better parent," THEN I could be happy. But here's what I discovered: I was basically trading my happiness today for some mythical future moment that... spoiler alert... never actually arrives the way we think it will.

I went full nerd on this concept and found it EVERYWHERE—the Bible, Buddhist teachings, 12-step programs, that anonymous Rabbi I'd never heard of. When the same wisdom shows up across totally unrelated sources? That's when you know you're onto something big.

What this actually looks like in real life:

• That moment when you're stuck in traffic for TWO HOURS (true story from last month) and you realize you can choose to make THIS moment beautiful
• When your toddler has a two-hour meltdown about not getting a cookie and you discover peace isn't dependent on their emotional regulation
• When you're hiding in your pantry eating goldfish crackers and you realize happiness doesn't require anything to change

The most present, happy people are actually the most productive people. When you're not desperately trying to escape this moment, magic happens.

Next time your brain tells you "it'll be better when..." catch it. Ask yourself: "What thought could I have right now that would let me tap into joy in THIS moment?"

This moment, with all its beautiful messiness, is as good as it gets. And that's not bad news. That's the most liberating news ever.

If this episode helped you see your "right now" differently, would you mind leaving a review? It helps other overwhelmed parents find these conversations, and honestly, that's my whole mission here. ❤️

Stay connected, stay curious, and remember, you're already enough.

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista