Today we are talking about one of my favorite topics ever, the roots of attachment.

Nature’s answer to separation is not independence. It is connection.
Deep, steady, invisible roots that help our kids and us hold on even when we are apart.

In this episode, I talk about the six layers of attachment that Dr. Gordon Neufeld describes, from the first root of the senses all the way down to being fully known and loved for who we are.

We talk about:

• How attachment deepens each year of a child’s life
• Why separation feels so hard and what to do about it
• How to strengthen connection when your child pulls away
• What it means to experience separateness without losing togetherness

Think of this one like a gardening episode for the heart. We are learning how to care for the roots that keep us connected no matter the distance.

Grab your tea, take a breath, and let’s dig in.

Learn more here --> https://connectmethodparenting.com

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

We talk a lot about emotions, regulation, and connection—but underneath all of it is belief. What we believe about ourselves, our kids, and what’s possible determines everything that follows.

In this episode, I dive into the discipline of belief—the conscious, daily practice of choosing thoughts that align with who you’re becoming instead of who you’ve been. We’ll talk about why your nervous system clings to old stories, how to rewire it with kindness, and what it really takes to believe something new when nothing around you has changed yet.

This isn’t about pretending. It’s about practice.
Because belief is a muscle, and when you train it intentionally, your entire reality starts to shift—your parenting, your peace, your sense of possibility.

By the end, you’ll know exactly how to:

• Identify the beliefs keeping you stuck
• Create new ones that actually feel true
• Practice them until they become your default state

It’s time to stop waiting for proof.
This is The Discipline of Belief.

Learn more here --> https://connectmethodparenting.com

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

This week we’re talking about weakness. The parts of us we try to hide, fix, or wish away. But what if weakness isn’t bad? What if it’s actually where our strength grows?

In this episode, I talk about how being hard on yourself never helps, how to see your weak spots with kindness, and why loving all parts of you makes you a calmer, happier parent.

You’ll learn how to:

• Stop beating yourself up when you mess up
• See your weakness as a teacher
• Feel strong even when you don’t feel perfect

This one is soft, honest, and real. You’re going to feel better about being human after listening.

Learn more here --> https://connectmethodparenting.com

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

If attachment (or togetherness) is the ultimate need, then facing separation is the ultimate threat. Wild, right?

In this episode, I’m diving into what that really means, why connection is the invisible gravity holding us (and our kids) together, and how the brain’s built-in systems for pursuit, alarm, and frustration kick in anytime that togetherness feels shaky.

We’re talking meltdowns, clinginess, people-pleasing, all of it, through a totally new lens. You’ll start seeing that what looks like “bad behavior” is usually just a brilliant little human trying to feel safe again.

Once you get this, parenting gets a whole lot clearer (and calmer). Connection stops being something you do and becomes who you are.

Learn more here --> https://connectmethodparenting.com

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

This is one of my favorite topics to teach: the powerful emotional journey from mad to sad. In this episode, I talk about what Dr. Gordon Neufeld calls the path of adaptation, the incredible shift from frustration and resistance to sadness and surrender.

I’ll walk you through the “traffic circle” of big emotions, how our brains look for exits when things don’t go our way, and why the second exit, the one where we change ourselves instead of the situation, is where emotional growth actually happens.

We’ll also talk about how to create the conditions for this kind of growth in our homes. What helps our kids and us feel safe enough to move through futility and into maturity? And why crying, real sad tears, is one of the most healing things we can do.

If you’ve ever wondered how to help your child handle disappointment, rejection, or just plain “no,” this episode will help you see those moments as doorways to growth, not breakdowns to fix.

Learn more here --> https://connectmethodparenting.com

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

Parenting isn’t tidy. It’s muddy, unpredictable, and sometimes really uncomfortable. In this episode, I’m talking about what it means to come alongside your child, especially when their choices, emotions, or beliefs stretch you in ways you didn’t expect.

We’ll explore how to stay close when everything in you wants to pull away, how to listen with curiosity instead of control, and how to build a relationship that can hold steady through the chaos, confusion, and change that come with raising growing humans.

Because real connection isn’t built in the easy moments. It’s built in the mess.

💛 Let’s dive in together.

Learn more here --> https://connectmethodparenting.com

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

What if everything you've been doing to become a better parent has been backwards?

In this raw, real episode, I share a powerful revelation from my kitchen reorganization weekend (and a real-time call from my sick daughter) that changes everything about how we approach parenting goals.

You'll discover why your to-do lists and behavior strategies keep falling short—and the inside-out approach that actually creates lasting change.

The Do-Have-Be Trap:

• The exhausting cycle of trying to prove you're a good mom through productivity
• Why "if I just get the routine right, THEN I'll be patient" never works
• The moment I realized the equation was completely backwards

What BE Goals Actually Are:

• Goals that don't depend on your life being perfect
• Starting from identity instead of behavior
• Who you're BEING while cleaning the kitchen, when nobody notices, when your kids don't listen

The 4-Step Assumption Method:

Step 1 - I AM It Claim your new identity NOW. "I am a calm, connected parent." Your nervous system listens to every "I am" statement you make.

Step 2 - FEEL It Emotionally embody the state in your body. Your nervous system responds to emotions, not words. Spend 2-3 minutes feeling how you'd feel if this identity were already true.

Step 3 - REVISE It Reimagine past moments that contradict your new identity. Instead of replaying them in guilt, replay them differently to create new neural pathways.

Step 4 - LIVE It Make daily choices as if you're already that person. Drop the timeline. Assume it's inevitable and let reality catch up.

Create Your First BE Goal:

1. Thought Download: Write everything you want to do or create as a parent (10 minutes)
2. Circle Your Top 3: What matters most right now?
3. Pick ONE: Just one focus for the next 90 days
4. Name Your Identity: "I am the kind of person who..."

Your Daily Practice:

• Morning: Say your "I Am" statement out loud, feel it in your body
• Throughout the day: Notice when you remember your BE goal
• Night: Revise one moment—replay it how you wish it had gone

Reflect on This:

• Who do you want to BE when your child is melting down?
• Who do you want to BE when nobody notices what you did?
• Who do you want to BE for yourself when life refuses to cooperate?

Your answers to these questions are your BE goals.

You don't need to do your way into better parenting. You don't need more strategies or hacks. You need to start BEING the parent you want to be right now—today. Before your kids change, before circumstances improve, before anything looks different.

Be → Do → Have

That's the new formula. That's how change sticks.

This week, pick ONE BE goal. Write it down. Say it out loud. Feel it like your life depends on it. Live it the best you can. Watch what happens.

If you loved this episode, please subscribe and leave a review! It helps us get the word of Connect Method Parenting out to more parents who are ready to break the cycle.

Go connect with your kids! Love you lots.

Learn more here --> https://connectmethodparenting.com

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista

I've shared these ideas across 100+ episodes, but I wanted them all in one place. These are the concepts that make Connect Method Parenting different, the foundation of everything we do inside League and what I teach on this podcast.

I'm going through them fairly quickly in this episode, so if you want to go deeper on any of these, search the podcast or come ask me inside League during office hours.

In this episode:

• Connection is your most powerful tool (and your child's most essential need)
• Why life is designed to be 50% amazing and 50% terrible, and why accepting this changes everything
• It only takes one person to improve a relationship, and that person is you
• Your brain will ruin your life if you don't supervise it (primitive brain vs. higher brain)
• Emotional maturity is spontaneous but not inevitable, here's how to create the conditions for it
• What you want matters more than other people's expectations of you
• How you think about yourself literally creates the quality of your life
• Everyone is doing the best they can in the moment (yes, even when they ate the brownies)
• Nature knows what it's doing, trust the timing
• Your emotions come from your thoughts (not from your kids' behavior)

A few things I mention:

• The baby powder blizzard of 2007 (my origin story)
• Hiking Machu Picchu with my daughter having a meltdown
• Dr. Gordon Neufeld's work on attachment and emotional maturation
• The Daily Peace process we do inside League
• The "More emotion, less feeling" concept

Want to go deeper?

These ideas are just the beginning. Inside League (my coaching program), we take these concepts and actually apply them to your real life, your kids, your triggers, your specific situations. Learn more at https://cmp.works/pivot

If you've been enjoying the podcast, I'd love it if you'd leave a review. It helps get Connect Method Parenting out to more parents who need it.

Talk soon! Go connect with your kids.

Learn more here --> https://connectmethodparenting.com

Next Steps: Leave a review if you've been enjoying the CMP Podcast

My Book: https://cmp.works/1xs

My IG: https://cmp.works/ista