Joe is in a reflective mood with his mentor Bob Anderson, looking up at the scoreboard of past marriages and arguments and asking, "Is there even a scoreboard?"

In today's episode of Divorce and Conquer, current therapist Bob and former sports star Joe break down our understanding of ego. How much does our ego drive us – and at what cost? Why do we need to validate ourselves in our relationships, and what does that winning mentality do to our partner? 

This is a deep dive into what drives us – our ego or our self-esteem? When do we let our ego wander into the world of self-indulgence? There are life lessons aplenty in this insightful episode. Please join Joe and Bob and let's learn how to become better men, regardless of where we are in our marriage. 

"I define ego as what I can do. And self-esteem as more of who I am." - Bob Anderson

In This Episode:

- Why the ego is supposed to steer and navigate, not drive you into walls

- What is your need to be right versus your need to be respected?

- When does your need to be right diminish your partner?

- Why do we need to validate ourselves in our relationships?

- How sexy is self-esteem?

- Should star players get star treatment?

- When professional sportsmen let their competitive side get to them

- Who doesn't want emotional satisfaction?

- Marry the girl, marry the family

- Learning to unlearn what is no longer true

And so much more!

Resources:

• (The Book of Poetry Bob recommends) The Ego Is Always at the Wheel - The Ego Is Always at the Wheel: Bagatelles: Delmore Schwartz, Robert Phillips: 9780811210287

Connect with Joe Staszak:

Twitter

LinkedIn

Website

Facebook - Divorce & Conquer

If you’ve been through three divorces and you know full well your complicity in contributing to the sclerotic atmosphere of a doomed relationship right on through the divorce proceedings, how do you turn your life around and learn to become a more compassionate human being, devoid of all of the satanic toxicity that landed you in that dark, dark environment in the first place? This is Chip Farley’s story, as he tells it in this heart-to-heart episode of Divorce and Conquer with our host, Joe Staszak. 

Chip Farley is Joe’s spiritual guide and a man he credits as helping him turn his life around. He’s also Joe’s brother-in-law.  Chip’s humility shines through as he earnestly shares what he got wrong in his first few marriages (and divorces) — and how he has managed to redeem himself in a relatively short period of time as part of an ever-evolving process.

Faith and spirituality play a big role in Chip’s journey too, as he shares the power of becoming consistent by being accountable - And according to Chip this starts with reading the Bible every day. 

There’s a lot we can learn from Farley — and Staszak is experienced enough to be able to draw his unparalleled wisdom out of him, with both of them displaying great humility about their process stories of understanding the human condition as it relates to positive and productive interaction with other members of the same species.

“The only thing we can control is our reaction to what happens.” ~ Chip Farley

In This Episode:

- How to demonstrate power in a relationship with a woman

- What it means to be a jerk in a divorce

- Learning how to change yourself

- Having someone else’s back — the foxhole mentality

- Chip’s pull towards God 

- How to look at your divorce from a new perspective

- If your blood pressure is elevated, don’t respond

- The only thing we get to do is react to what happens

- What is ‘permissible free will’? 

- Learning to become consistent by being accountable

- The only baggage you can unpack is your own

And so much more!

Connect with Chip Farley:

Email: chipfarley@gmail.com

Connect with Joe Staszak:

Twitter

LinkedIn

Website

Joe is wearing his heart on his sleeve in this episode of Divorce and Conquer as he reflects on where this show has taken him and what he’s learned so far — and where he’s going to next. 

Joe credits his brother-in-law for teaching him the lesson of being ‘unoffendable’. Does ‘the pronoun thing’ offend you? Why? Learn to discipline your thoughts and let go of the crazy mediocrity in society that we can’t control — and gain more time and freedom in the process.

‘Unoffended people have more time!’ That’s Joe, giving it to us straight. He’s a guy’s guy in a crazy world, just trying to make sense of what is going on and showing us how we can sleep better, be more creative, and become more compassionate when we don’t sweat the small stuff. Let the Big Dawgg Hunt!

“If you think you’re a lost cause — and that goes back to the unredeemable part — you’re not. Everyone can be saved. I’m talking physically and spiritually. I’ll do the physical part and you’ll have to look upstairs for the spiritual part.” ~ Joe Staszak

In This Episode:

- Joe unpacks the movie ’Spirited’ as it relates to being unredeemable

- Joe speaks about answering his calling 

- Joe addresses ‘the pronoun thing’ 

- Joe’s beef with the Washington Redskins name

- What does it mean to be ‘unoffendable’?

- Why waste your time on Twitter? 

- Learning not to care about what people you don’t even know think

- Avoiding conversations that don’t lead to a resolution

- Why overlooking the small things is key

- Becoming more compassionate and practicing unconditional love

- Joe’s ex-wife finds out about this podcast!

And so much more!

Connect with Joe Staszak:

Twitter

LinkedIn

Website