Episodes

  • True Freedom: Surrender and Choice

    True Freedom: Surrender and Choice
    Jul 30 2024
    “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” Maya Angelou It is the day after Independence Day. I’m watching the street sweeper brush up the remnants of yesterday’s fireworks shells on the neighborhood streets of Jacksonville Beach, Florida. The detritus of the party is all that is left after America’s red, white and blue holiday. Last night thousands of people poured past the front of my house to go to the beach to watch the fireworks and celebrate freedom and independence. Thousands of explosions small and large rocked the beach and I was in the middle of it. A far cry from the remote shores of Lake Superior in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan where I have spent the last 10 years celebrating the holiday with my sister and family. But nothing is at all like the past for me this year and it has me examining my attachments really closely and getting super clear on what truly is conscious choice and surrender. Because somewhere in between that lies True Freedom in this lifetime. True freedom isn’t surrendering to the current and going with the flow that others set for us. A lot of people think that is an easy life - just let go! Don’t choose, let life take you as it may - everything happens for a reason etc…That’s just floating. Delegating your personal responsibility for your life to others so you have the excuse “I was just going with the flow!” or “I had no choice!” You did though. You chose not to choose in that situation because something in your programming, that artificial intelligence of your negative ego, has you so afraid to do so. whether you believe you can’t have nice things, or you are so afraid to fail, or who knows what your damage is, but if you never examine the baggage you carry, you will never know. On the other side, is someone like me. Controlling every single aspect of everything in your life with an exacting plan that everything must go according to, or else. Achieving the objective of the moment. Because achievement of the next thing is the highest good. Except sometimes, er, well, a lot of the time, my objective is misinformed because it comes from my subconscious programming and I am not aware of that, until it's too late. If you try to control every little thing you are so busy controlling you can’t see or hear the signs that there is something better or that a higher path could open up, paved in opportunities. Except in these situations I honestly believe I am acting from conscious choice when I double down in stubborn determinism and radical self reliance “to make it work!” to “achieve the gold star!” to “take care of the problem!” But as my recent move from St. Augustine to my partner's house in Jax Beach proves - NO, I’m not always aware of how my thoughts are creating my reality. And I made a lot of things harder on myself by just assuming I had to do it all myself because that is the way it has always been. Meanwhile my partner is left wondering why I didn’t trust him enough to ask for help. And I realized I didn’t because I assumed I couldn’t and I was afraid of retribution for asking at all. So yeah - I didn’t trust. So here I am - surrendering to the change and the shift - all beautiful things coming from being in partnership with another but I was completely unwilling to look at how I approached a situation with him on my team, or even being on a team period. Huh. Was that conscious choice from my higher self? I couldn’t let go of control and my subconscious programming for two seconds, I reacted and went right into “do it all yourself” mode. But I won’t do that specific thing again. Now that I see it and can be willing to let it go. I can learn from it and be aware in the future and not do it that way again. No shame, no blame or guilt. Yes I was emotional when the situation was brought up for me to look at it. But most of it was from the release of all that stored shit in my subconscious and it wasn’t directed at anybody, as much as it was messy. Literally my suitcase of unexpressed emotion was strewn all over my partner's living room. And luckily he’s very patient and held space to let me work it through. So how do we know if we are surrendering our attachments and living and choosing from the collective consciousness of the higher selves and ascended masters i.e. the positive ego, free of the negative ego and shadow self? We can’t sit there and analyze every action. Or can we? No, we can’t - that analysis paralysis would be using our lower self to attempt to solve the problem that got us there in the first place. We have to use discernment. And this is where training comes in and the invocation of the Adept Initiate. “It is by will alone that I set my mind in motion.” Every human being, myself very much included, is far from perfect but the path to know thyself allows us to get clearer and ...
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    9 mins
  • The Sun

    The Sun
    Jul 12 2024
    “Love God and then do whatever you wish.” St. Augustine This is the quote for the spiritual experience of the sun tarot card in my ultimate guide to the Raider Waite Tarot book. I had to laugh as I read it this morning sitting down to write this podcast. I decided to write about the sun card because it is the solstice, and the sun symbolizes rebirth and daily renewal. And surprise! This month and for the rest of this year I am in a process of change and renewal yet again. I’m currently writing this on my deck in St. Augustine, Florida. Inside my little house in the woods surrounded by magick and elemental beings are boxes ready to be packed and put into storage. I’m moving. Again. I just put the last of my Seattle life into a storage locker at my good friend’s condo and now I am putting my St. Augustine things into storage until November when I hopefully move into my new house that is currently being built. “Birth is not a momentary event, but a permanent process. Our aim in life is to become completely born…living means being born every minute.” Erich Fromm. The process of rebirth for me has been going on for years. But more intensely these last 2 since I was called to step up in my spiritual practice and make this move to St. Augustine. I keep laughing because it really seems to keep getting more intense when silly me thought it would chill out by now. But relocating your life and business across the country is a process. All good things - meeting the love of one's life, co-creating a new home together, establishing a foothold in a new city, building a new community, taking yet another bar exam (I could do without this step but it's a right of passage in my profession) - these are all major things. As is exiting a place (Seattle) where you built a life for the past 20 years. What I’m learning in part is surrender. Allowing the will of God to flow through me. Allowing the highest good to flow through me. And not being an obstacle to my own birthing process. Not being an obstacle to my own greatness and purpose. I will, thy will, I say. Let my greatest desire be that I fulfill my contract with God. The purpose I made for myself when I was spirit before I had amnesia caused by this physical density. So, I am attempting to understand with my higher self my needs and wants. Then holding the vision for them to be met. And thus arranging my priorities to ensure that energetically, and then physically. Versus clinging to my past self and fighting the process. I surrender to the process of rebirthing. So I shared the quote that I read and laughed out loud when looking at The Sun card. There are no coincidences that St. Augustine himself is speaking to me today. Love God i.e. love yourself and all beings and allow the will of god to flow through you. Then do what you want. Well, when the will of god flows through you - you become an agent for the best and highest good. December of 2023 marked one year of my leap of faith to move to St. Augustine. And although it was a month of upheaval and unmet expectations for myself and others it was actually really great - because I put my house in order. I had to sit down with myself and decide the priorities for Angel’s life. What was it that I really desired and wanted in my life? Yes, I want to do God’s will but I’m not a robot. I’m a human being with needs and wants and one of our 4 basic needs is love. I decided that the most important thing to me in my life was to find my life partner. Someone I could spend my life with who would love me for me, and I would love them for them in return - and we could be a team. Team us. I also decided that I was going to fully let go of Seattle. That I was going to ground my light here in St. Augustine. I was going to plant my energy in this soil and build my life here instead of traversing the country every other week or month and running myself ragged in the process. The result of this decision? Within 2 months I was registered for the Florida Bar Exam, I found a location for my light center at the Center for Spiritual Living, and I was in a relationship with a person that I love and who loves me in return, who actually wants to spend their life with me as a team. Not someone in it for some sense of immediate gratification but actual loyalty and commitment to building a relationship and all the co-creation that goes with that. And as a result of all of that, here I am. Moving and rebirthing myself again. But not chaotically. I’m executing (with assistance) the vision of grounding myself here in St. Augustine and the universe is supporting me because it's in alignment with my purpose. How do I know? Because I trust my higher self, I trust the tools of my spiritual practice and the law of the universe I am watching at play around me. I’m far from perfect, or a perfect situation but I’m ...
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    10 mins
  • To Everything There is a Season

    To Everything There is a Season
    May 29 2024
    My partner asked me the other day, “Do you ever envy other people?” and I had to think about it for a second. His health has been a significant challenge recently and our relationship is strong but new - so I’ve been in a place of “well fuck, universe, thanks for sending me the love of my life and threatening to take him away just as quickly.” It's been a real practice in gratitude to stay in ACTUAL gratitude for the time I have with him - because I am here watching him suffer from severe pain & distress as his organs rebel for some unknown reason and his body fills with fluid. So, in some ways the answer to his question is yes. In fact, hell yeah! I currently envy all those people who take their health and their partnerships for granted. I envy his ex’s who used, abused, and didn’t covet every minute they had with him while he was healthy but instead threw the time away. As here I am picking up the pieces of their heartbreak mess as I stand beside one of the strongest, bravest men I’ve ever met. But at the same time - even though I am jealous of his ghosts, I’m not envious of them. I’d never want to be in those past women’s shoes (i.e. not self aware, actually taking for granted such a gem of a man in their life). I know that it would be nice to have been in their time and place - adventuring, dancing, living an active life - but would I have been ready then? Would he have been ready for me then? Would we have been ready then? It's best we are here right now, the people we are right now, facing this now with the strengths we both have together. In this now. I know many people who are doing really well and I’m honestly happy for them. I hold no envy or yearning to be in a different place than I am, with a different person, with a different life. I hold gratitude that I finally met this man that I can share space & time with, and just be me with, and feel safe with and give my loyalty to. Someone I can create even more love in this world with. Someone I can be a better person with, and dedicate myself to doing just that. We both share this desire to help others, making the world a better place because we were here. And I just want to enjoy our life together no matter how much time we have left. So no - I don’t envy anyone else. I do not want to be anyone else. I am very satisfied and happy in my life and I am extremely capable of experiencing and generating more joy even in the face of knowing the one who I am most attached to could leave me alone in this physical life sooner than later. Every single day is precious. We just do not have the luxury of taking it for granted anymore. There is a poem I read when teaching to empower thyself that I shall paraphrase right now - essentially it says that God is not “I was” because you cannot find any joy living in the past. And God is not “I will” because you cannot find any joy worrying about the future. God is only “I AM” because you can find all possibilities in the present. All ability to create, live, love and enjoy is here right now. So that is where you will find joy. (Sing) “I close my eyes only for a moment and the moments are gone. All my dreams pass before my eyes a curiosity. Dust in the wind. All they are is dust in the wind. Don’t hang on,nothing forever but the earth and sky. It slips away and all your dollars won’t buy another minute. Dust in the wind. All we are is dust in the wind…” (read) “Where for I perceive there is nothing better than that a man should rejoice in his own works; for that is his portion: for who shall bring him to see what shall be better after him?” Ecclesiastes 3-22. I’m writing this podcast on May 1st, Beltane, May Day, the 1st day of summer in the ancient Celtic and pre-Celt calendars. Beltane is a day of celebration for creation, passion, fertility because here in Spring - is the TIME to start the creation process because the divine masculine and divine feminine energies are at their peak. Father Sky and the sun are perfect to send their rays and mature our plants & endeavors and mover earth’s womb is ready to grow them. She as divine feminine will gestate the seed in her fertile womb so that in a few months a harvest shall come. Two things are going on here. The earth is ripe & ready and the sun's rays are about to peak into crescendo. And the hermetic principle of gender - the universal rule that masculine and feminine energy is needed in a relationship to create (otherwise known as divine union). The holy marriage of opposites results in the perfect harmony necessary to spark and nurture creation. And now is the time for this creation. We are made in God's image - The Elohim. Elo & Eloha - divine masculine & feminine in divine union creator gods. And this is why when we are in balance both within and without we are more effective in creation. Also, now in the wheel of the year we have this peak moment to invest our ...
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    13 mins
  • Nurturing Seeds with the Power of Intention

    Nurturing Seeds with the Power of Intention
    Apr 23 2024
    “When your determination changes, everything will begin to move in the direction you desire. The moment you resolve to be victorious, every nerve and fiber in your being will immediately orient itself toward your success. On the other hand if you think “this will never work out,” then at that instant every cell in your being will be deflated and give up the fight. Everything then will move in the direction of failure. I want you to understand the subtle workings of the mind. How you orient your mind, the kind of attitude you have, greatly influences both yourself and your environment.” This quote is from Daisaku Ikeda, former president of Soka Gakkai International, the largest and most diverse lay organization of Buddhist practitioners in the world. And it has been on or by my desk for at least 10 years. And I’m pretty sure that I first scribbled it down over 20 years ago when I first moved to Seattle, Washington in 2005. Now after 13 years of studying esoterics and metaphysics it still rings true it just has so many additional levels of meaning and truth. Forbes Magazine recently stated that - “intention is a critical factor in achieving success…It provides a purposeful and strategic approach to navigating life's complexities and a guiding force propelling you toward a future of purpose, genuineness and success.” the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy shares that Intention is “mental directedness towards objects, as if the mind were construed as a mental bow whose arrows could be properly aimed at different targets.” The key here that unlocks the Power of Intention is the alignment and purposeful direction of your thoughts and actions toward a desire that you really want to achieve in your life. A prerequisite then for this alignment is you must know for yourself what you desire. What do you really want for your life? Where do your passions lie? What gives you a sense of true fulfillment? If you do not know what you want and desire in the heart of your hearts then it is really going to be hard to align your thoughts and actions to make that desire happen. And you never unlock the true power of intention. The definition of intentional according to Webster's dictionary is “Done on purpose; deliberate.” Synonyms include “Conscious, Willed and Purposeful.” In my esoteric and Kabbalistic training we are taught that the Magickian or Alchemist uses their imagination to clearly identify and describe their specific desire, and then they must set their intention, concentration and will upon the appropriate object. None of this saying "Walk around your life like a zombie doing whatever everyone else says you should do.” In fact, it is specifically the opposite. Intention is “thinking ahead and making choices based on personal beliefs, values, and goals.” Not acting on impulse, but planning ahead to choose things that create a positive impact for your life and the things you value. Okay, okay, Angel, you might be saying. Great, be more positive. Be more intentional. Those are great buzzwords but how do I do that? But that's just it. I’m not telling you to BE MORE positive, or BE MORE Intentional. That would be me “shoulding” on you. Instead I’m giving you an equation that if you choose to follow it for yourself - your thoughts and actions will be the cause that results in the effect of an intentional life. And that intentional life of thinking and doing on purpose with purpose will result in you achieving more of what you actually want, desire and desire, which will result in you feeling more fulfillment and joy and gratitude for what you have and have been able to accomplish. Which will fuel more gratitude, and more ability to to be intentional. It is a positive cycle of cause and effect which will in turn result in you becoming positive and living a more joyful life. No shoulding needed. Because you will be doing it. And that is the most important thing. So let’s review the equation that allows you to unlock the Power of Intentional creation in your life. Step one and the foundational piece is that you need to get clear on what it is you want and desire in your life. What do you really want for you? All studies and literature on this point to you identifying for you what brings you joy and passion. (not simply what brings you momentary pleasure) But what are your values, what gives you a sense of fulfillment? What feels purposeful? Now if you are at this step (step one) and already stuck, don’t worry. Start small. Identify a very short term clear achievable thing you would like in your life that you personally would feel good about if you accomplished. This can be very selfish (or may feel selfish and that is ok, we have to start somewhere). So this could be taking a weekend trip to a place you want to see. Or paying off a credit card. Balancing your budget. Cleaning your garage. Going to ...
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    15 mins
  • The Triple Rabbit Hole

    The Triple Rabbit Hole
    Mar 26 2024
    It is time to go down a rabbit hole, my friends. The Rabbit and the Hare are both symbols of abundance, fertility, the womb, the moon, rebirth, and the goddess - and in this month of Ostara (Vernal Equinox) and Easter, when I am releasing this 3rd installment of the 3rd season of my podcast in the 3rd month of the year the symbol of the triple goddess, the trilogy, and the triple rabbit known as the Triskele (spelled out T R I S K E L E) is front and center in my consciousness. The Triskele, the symbol of the triple rabbit or three hares, features three rabbits running in a circle and their ears join in the center to make an equilateral triangle. This symbol transcends religions found in Buddhist, Muslim, Christian and Celtic/Nordic traditions. It's found on a cave wall in China and drawn on rocks in Germanic and Celtic stones, and found within Christian churches in the British Isles. Like many symbols, it has been adopted by religion, but not really religious, as religion is really the new kid on the block - symbolism goes back much further into the primordial origins and archetypes of humans. Symbols are the sacred geometric building blocks of the universe - circles, squares, and triangles. All things are built on, and with these 3 shapes and sacred geometry is the stuff upon which all material comes into formation. I told you we were going down a rabbit hole and here we go - if you look at the Triskele in Celtic illustrations the rabbits running in circles are often replaced by spirals - the spiral is the Fibonacci Sequence and the pattern that fractals, flowers, snails, trees, crystal and all life grows in. In other words, the triple rabbit is the fibonacci sequence, the sacred geometric pattern of all life. So, my three rabbits running in a circle with a triangle in the center represent life itself. The kingdom of heaven is embodied in this flesh, for I am the kingdom, the power, and the glory. Amen. (singing a little) "Jesus Christ Superstar… do you think you are what they say you are?" I share this Andrew Lloyd Webber lyric to make a point - Jesus, our celebrated riser from the dead at this time of year (symbolizing the resurrection of the earth from winter and all the cycles of rebirth and fertility that come at the vernal equinox), DID know EXACTLY what he was and was trying REALLY REALLY hard to get the rest of us humans at the time to listen. We are spirit embodied in this flesh. The glory and power of divine energy is held within this physicality. Thus, all the power of a god to manifest miracles can come forth from within each and every one of us. Spirit is symbolized with a triangle, as is fire. The fire of alchemy, the transformation from muck to gold. From this mundane flesh to spirit. To be enlightened is to sever the attachment to this physical body, being ALL that we are and are meant to be in this life. Yes, our physical bodies are built from sacred geometry; just look at the double helix of our physical DNA and then at the glyph of the Kabbalistic Tree of Life. But that just means our spirit is currently contained in our flesh, not that we are only this flesh and blood. Our journey in this lifetime, and what Jesus was trying to teach us, is that we can create miracles in our lives if we believe we are and choose to truly know ourselves as God. We need to know ourselves as divine beings capable of manifesting the life of purpose we want to live. But no one but ourselves can know yourself as this divine being. But once we choose to know ourselves as divine, as spirit, as a creator of our life - ignorance of our larger universal power cannot be taken away. The fundamental knowledge of the self as divine spirit opens the gate to the kingdom of heaven (not some place in the clouds with angels playing harps). Still, you reclaim your crown as the sovereign of your life and create a kingdom of joy, light, and abundance for yourself, your family and your community. And this is how we are going to create peace on earth. Like the church hymn. "Let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with me." Shambala is a world where humans have actualized themselves, awakened to the possibility that they are the creator God of their life and are living that daily. They are treating themselves as a God and thus treating others as a God. If you know and love yourself as a divine and worthy being, you can know and love another as a divine and worthy being. Even if that divine being makes choices that harm you. You can forgive those who harm you because they know not what they do. They are ignorant that they are God and that they are harming another god. They are ignorant that they have a choice in what they are doing. Okay, some of you may now think I've fallen off my proverbial rocker with this rabbit hole. I've gone from three rabbits running in a circle to sacred geometry, Jesus Christ Superstar, and You are God. Yep—and now we are going to talk about the Easter Bunny. Jesus Christ, Angel....
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    14 mins
  • Love is NOT all you Need: The Truth About Relationships

    Love is NOT all you Need: The Truth About Relationships
    Feb 27 2024
    “There are no happy endings in Love. Because as long as love exists there is no ending but transformation. Love is the force that transforms eternity.” Sovereign Ipsissimus Dave Lanyon (Angel singing all you need is love) “Love is all you need.” The Beatles Yet, love is not enough for a relationship between two people to flourish. Long-term romantic relationships require effort applied to the appropriate object (the relationship) in order to work long-term. And the appropriate object is not the other person in the relationship with you - that results in the desire to change the other person, or fixate on them for good or bad, and it creates dependency on them like a substance. (now you want to love and care for and be kind to the other person but that is not the focus point of your effort when in a romantic relationship). So, let me backup for a second. Let me describe what I’ve learned about relationships hermetically. Imagine that a relationship is a pyramid (a triangle). The two people in love and in relationship form the base of the pyramid so man and woman or man/man, woman/woman are at the two corners - then at the top of the pyramid is The Relationship. It is a 3rd entity, a “child” so to speak created by the two beings in relationship, through the exchange of masculine and feminine energies. The Relationship itself is an entity and it is born of the two making a commitment to themself and to the other to always better themself (because we are not perfect) and better the relationship (because its made of two imperfect beings - so needs effort and nurture and improvement of those two beings to thrive). The only way the relationship is going to work is if there is TRUST - consistency of actions and repeatedly doing what you said you were going to do for and with the other person, and for and with yourself in relation to that other person.PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY - recognition that as a human being you are not perfect and that you are always seeing, hearing,doing things thru a filter of your mind/thoughts/programming and that you are going to do your best to acknowledge and take responsibility for your mind/thoughts/programming in all of their imperfections.COMMITMENT - commitment to the relationship via the discipline of being a better individual through personal growth and development. Discipline to know thyself better and be better in the world through the positive actualization of your purpose. Finally encircling all of these, ideally there is a shared understanding of value in something between the two people - family, faith, spirituality, purpose. Maybe simply the recognition that all humans are just that, human, and we all deserve to be treated as such. Returning to the point - If you are committed to making yourself better because you Love yourself and respect yourself as a divine being then you can respect the other human in the relationship the same way, and then work with that person to nourish the relationship like you are raising a child. Resting this nourishment on the foundation of Trust, Honesty, Personal Responsibility, Commitment and Care - you can love and flow love in this cycle because the channel for that love to flow is held open by those foundational elements I described and the archway they create. (and if one of these elements is missing then like a dam the flow for your love gets blocked and the child/relationship will suffer). If you can’t see yourself first as the central sun of your universe, making your own world with your thoughts, actions and perspectives, all of the foundational elements are challenged. If all you see is the world acting upon you, standing in need, or in victim or blaming other people for not treating you right or giving you what you need, then you are not able to take responsibility for yourself as the creator of the central source of awareness in your universe. It is essential to recognize that every relationship with every single person, place or thing in your life starts in your mind. It lives first in your thoughts and those thoughts are colored by that mind. So let me put a pause on the relationship between two people, for just a moment so we can understand this extremely important point. First let’s just define what is a relationship period, and how relationships work in your life. A relationship is simply a connection you have with a person, place or thing and it can be positive or negative. It does not require there to be affection, for example you can have a relationship with your car, your computer, your house, your city of residence. You can also have relationships with pets and with people - family, friends, colleagues, employees, your favorite barista. And then you have romantic relationships with your spouse, lover, partner whatever label you choose and state of commitment you are in. Everything you do is in relationship and every relationship is colored by your thoughts and thus your mind (...
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    18 mins
  • Renewal, Refresh, Reboot, Rebirth and the Phoenix

    Renewal, Refresh, Reboot, Rebirth and the Phoenix
    Jan 24 2024
    When we are born and take our first breath, our soul enters this physical flesh, and we become animated. We enter this density and forget what it was like to be a spirit. The only thing that keeps us tethered to that experience is our soul - and as we learn things from this physical experience through our five physical and spiritual senses, our experience as spirit gets further and further away. We start building many programs that display our personality and become masks we wear. We project ways of being upon ourselves like a drive-in movie theater screen. For example, if this happens, it means this is about me or another person. I'm not worthy of love because…, we can't have nice things, that way of life is not for me… or in front of my parents, I act this way; when dating, I'm this way; when at work, I am this way. You have so many autonomous programs and various masks. When you are an adult, you forget entirely who you are. You also get super attached to this rental vehicle of physicality (some of us call it a meat suit) we walk around in. We believe this is all there is - perhaps diving into hedonistic pleasures that physicality has to offer us headlong to cope with the sense that this is all there is. Drinking, eating, sexting your way through life, putting more in, in an attempt to fill the void in your heart where a sense of purpose should be. Or you may bury yourself under another identity - mom, soldier, project manager, content creator, influencer. I don't know whatever form of busy floats your boat and how you associate every aspect of yourself with that job or role. But you can't be that role, job, or version of yourself forever. The flesh gives out, our beauty fades, we get injured, we get fat, we lose our strength, our hearing, our sigh. Either way, our purpose can never be found simply in the job we do because we are more than this body and this physical experience. We are spirit. (Pause) We have never been born, and we will never die (as spirit). But this physical body will most certainly die and fall away - that is the one certainty of this physical experience we are all having. Death. Wow. Angel. What a way to start out a new season of your podcast on a bright note. I am reminding everyone that they die. This is the truth, though. My job as an estate planning attorney is precisely this - I remind people of their mortality and get them to prepare for it so they do not leave their families a big, stinking, expensive mess when the physical inevitability occurs. It is never too early to plan, but it can always be too late. "if you are having trouble with planning, I can help! Feel free to shoot me an email for more information. Stay tuned until the end of the episode for contact info." But the point of this podcast today is to talk about a smaller kind of death and rebirth. The type of death held and symbolized within the Rider Waite Tarot card (Death), in the Rune stone Eihwaz, and in the cycle of the Phoenix. Renewal through the conscious choice to let go of your shit. Flush it down the toilet and start fresh. Or the willing submission to the holy fire of transformation - by letting go of the old so there is room for the new. Let's briefly talk about the Phoenix in case you need to familiarize yourself with this mythological being. Per my Signs & Symbols sourcebook, the bird symbolizes alchemy because it is reborn for its ashes after voluntarily combusting. Keyword here. Voluntarily. There is a whole process - where the Phoenix goes around the world collecting aromatic wood, herbs, and spices so it can build its funeral pyre in a date palm tree. Then it lights itself on fire and is reborn upon the next day's dawn. While alive for 500 to 1500 years, the Phoenix persists only on aromatic wood smoke, thus not harming anything to eat. Let's focus on the voluntary submission to the purifying flames, thus bringing rebirth as an archetype for us to explore. More importantly, the ritual. The slow, intentional gathering of the right spices, wood, and herbs, building a nest in a particular place, and performing the act in a specific time-space order for the magickal creatures' transformation. What is critical to this ritual is the intention. The willingness to let go of one life/to die because out the other side is more beauty, joy, and freedom. Now, not every change/little death in our lives happens this methodically. We may be forced to renew an aspect of ourselves because something is destroyed or stolen or a relationship with a person ends suddenly. Proverbial band-aids are ripped off in our lives all the time. I lost a lot of things this last year - so many that a part of me is tired of being resilient - but I didn't lose myself. I found more of myself than ever in the process of losing. This last year, I found myself robbed in a foreign country, far from home. The violation of that theft and losing all my healing tools became a gift. This is how I approached death. ...
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    15 mins
  • S2. Ep. 7 | Masculine and Feminine: The Hermetic Principle of Gender + Creation

    S2. Ep. 7 | Masculine and Feminine: The Hermetic Principle of Gender + Creation
    Mar 3 2023
    18 mins