When you can’t decide whether to stay or go in your marriage, your biggest fear is that if you decide to leave, you’ll be making a mistake. But staying on the fence can be an even bigger one.

In this special solo episode of the Off the Fence Podcast, I talk about why staying in limbo is so hard, and how you can finally move through it. I break down why waiting for absolute certainty will keep you frozen, and why clarity comes from taking action, not from a magical, lightning-bolt moment. Most importantly, I explore the real impact of staying versus leaving on children, finances, identity, and long-term happiness, all while challenging some of the biggest myths people believe about divorce.

Whether you're just beginning to question your marriage or you've been wrestling with the decision about whether to stay or go for years, this podcast episode offers a roadmap for moving from confusion to clarity.

It will help you learn how to trust yourself enough to make this kind of decision, and will give you a practical framework and the tools to make that decision in a way you won't second-guess for the rest of your life.

Karen Covy is a Divorce Coach and Consultant, Lawyer, Author, and Speaker who is dedicated to helping people make the best decisions possible for themselves, their families, and their future - especially in stressful times. You can check out Karen's videos on YouTube.

You can connect with Karen on LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and on her own website at karencovy.com.

What if the patterns keeping you stuck in unfulfilling relationships trace back to wounds you didn't even know needed healing? Relationship coach and hypnotherapist Mina Yang reveals how unresolved childhood trauma can quietly sabotage your ability to choose the right partners. More importantly, she reveals how you can finally break free.

Through her unique approach combining hypnotherapy and relationship coaching, Mina helps you understand why you keep repeating the same relationship mistakes and how you can finally have the love life you deserve.

In this podcast episode, Mina explains how childhood traumas create subconscious beliefs that drive our adult relationship choices, often causing us to chase emotionally unavailable partners or to sabotage our intimate relationships. She also shows how customized hypnotherapy recordings and guided meditations can rewire our deeply ingrained beliefs so that we can stop chasing the wrong partners and finally become attracted to someone healthier.

We also talk about the practical issues of when you should start dating after a divorce, how to avoid dating app scammers, and how to recognize red flags early on in a relationship.

Healthy, drama-free partnerships do exist, and this podcast episode could be your key to finally creating the love life and relationship you’ve been dreaming of.

About Mina

Mina Yang is a former academic turned hypnotherapist, relationship coach, and author devoted to helping people thrive in love and life. Drawing on her 20+ years as a music professor, her certification in Rapid Transformational Therapy, and her deep understanding of human psychology, she guides clients toward emotional freedom, self-love, and authentic connection. Mina’s work, including her book Boss Lady Boss Love, blends science, art, and soul to help people release old patterns and open to relationships that truly expand them.

Connect with Mina

You can connect with Mina on LinkedIn at Mina Yang True Connection and follow Mina on YouTube at Mina Yang. To learn more about working with Mina, visit her website at Mina Yang.

More from Mina

Get your copy of Mina’s book Boss Lady Boss Love

Join her upcoming retreat in April: True Connection Retreat

Learn more about her VIP True Connection Circle

Karen Covy is a Divorce Coach and Consultant, Lawyer, Author, and Speaker who is dedicated to helping people make the best decisions possible for themselves, their families, and their future - especially in stressful times. You can check out Karen's videos on YouTube.

You can connect with Karen on LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and on her own website at karencovy.com.

What if the evidence you need to win your divorce is hidden and you don't even know where to look? Becky Sampson, founder of Only Subpoenas, learned this lesson the hard way when she spent three and a half years representing herself against five attorneys in Hawaii family court. After mastering the art of subpoenas through 21 successful requests for financial records, she didn't just win her case, she discovered how to level the playing field when a spouse is hiding assets.

Most people think getting a forensic accountant is the answer when money seems to be missing, but there's a catch: accountants can only work with the documents they have been given. If your spouse won’t come clean with the financial records, even the best forensic accountant won’t be able to find where the money is hidden.

Subpoenas help you find the records you don’t have. They’re the actual key to uncovering hidden finances, from retirement accounts to employment records.

Becky explains the critical mistakes that cause one in three subpoenas to get rejected, why "foreign subpoenas" across state lines are trickier than anyone realizes, and how proper documentation creates the leverage that often leads to settlement before trial.

Now helping attorneys navigate the tedious compliance requirements most law firms avoid, Becky shows how the right information (obtained the right way) can transform a divorce from an endless battle into a fair resolution.

Whether you're self-represented or working with a lawyer, understanding when and how to use subpoenas could be the difference between guessing what exists and actually proving it in court.

About Becky

Becky Sampson is the Founder of ONLY Subpoenas™, a company born out of her own hard-won victory in the Hawaii Family Court system. After 21 hearings, 21 subpoenas, and 3½ years representing herself against five attorneys, Becky didn’t just win — she secured a fair and equitable financial outcome that honored both parties while keeping compassion at the center.

Now affectionately known as “Becky Brockovich,” she uses that experience to help others—especially women—navigate the legal and financial complexities of divorce with strength, clarity, and strategy. Her mission is to teach people how to uncover the truth, organize their evidence, and negotiate from a place of empowerment so they can walk away not just with peace of mind, but with what’s fair financially.

Connect with Becky

You can connect with Becky on LinkedIn at Becky Sampson and on Facebook at Becky Sampson. You can follow Becky on Instagram at Divorcing Strong Becky Sampson and on YouTube at Divorcing Strong. To learn more about working with Becky, visit her website at Only Subpoenas.

Free Download: 100 Legal Divorce Terms

Karen Covy is a Divorce Coach and Consultant, Lawyer, Author, and Speaker who is dedicated to helping people make the best decisions possible for themselves, their families, and their future - especially in stressful times. You can check out Karen's videos on YouTube.

You can connect with Karen on LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and on her own website at karencovy.com.

When life throws you into chaos - whether it's a divorce, a fractured family relationship, or a crossroads moment - the advice you get next can either save you or sink you. This compilation brings together the most powerful insights from the best of over 50 episodes about divorce, relationships, finance, psychology, and wellness. The professionals in this episode distill years of wisdom into practical strategies that actually work when your life is falling apart. From narcissistic abuse survivors to financial planners, therapists to health experts, these are the voices who've helped thousands navigate their darkest moments and come out stronger on the other side.

In this "Best of Off the Fence 2025" episode, you'll discover how adult children can be systematically isolated by narcissistic partners, the surprising way to flip out of "victim mode" by asking one simple question, and the Social Security mistakes that could cost you thousands. You'll also get practical guidance on building self-care routines that go beyond bubble baths and how to turn post-divorce dating into the foundation for a solid, fulfilling long-term relationship. Whether you're navigating family conflict, making financial decisions, trying to heal and rebuild after divorce, or you're looking to start over romantically, this collection offers the hard-won wisdom that only comes from experts who've guided countless others through these exact challenges.

Episode 113: Narcissistic Alienation of Adult Children: When Love Turns to Loss

Tracy Malone is an International divorce coach, narcissist abuse survival coach, author, speaker, educator, victim, and surTHRIVER of narcissistic abuse. Visit Tracy’s website Narcissist Abuse Support.

Episode 117: Trapped in Victim Mode? How to Flip Your Drama Triangle

Dr. Carrie Johansson is a psychologist turned speaker and author. Fondly known as The Sensible Psychologist. Visit her website at Self Help On The Go.

Episode 155: Social Security Mistakes That Cost Your Thousands

Eric Blake is a CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER® helping women 55+ navigate retirement with clarity and confidence. Visit Eric’s website at Blake Wealth Management.

Episode 137: Real Self-Care That Works When Your Life is Falling Apart

Jennifer Gilman, is a National Board-Certified Health & Wellness Coach and the visionary force behind New Way Health Coach. Visit Jennifer’s website at New Way Health Coach.

Episode 141: Navigating Post-Divorce Dating with Love Expert Laurie Gerber

Laurie Gerber is one of the most engaging and effective life coaches and presenters in the country. Visit her website at Laurie Gerber.

Karen Covy is a Divorce Coach and Consultant, Lawyer, Author, and Speaker who is dedicated to helping people make the best decisions possible for themselves, their families, and their future - especially in stressful times. You can check out Karen's videos on YouTube.

You can connect with Karen on LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and on her own website at karencovy.com.

Holidays can feel like a punch in the stomach when you’re going through a divorce. But divorce expert Jackie Pilossoph, the creator and CEO of Divorced Girl Smiling, has the perfect set of practical tips that will help you bring back some holiday joy, in spite of your divorce.

In this podcast episode, Jackie shares deeply relatable stories and actionable tips for surviving the holidays, even if you’re feeling sad, alone, or overwhelmed. Jackie opens up about her own experience of spending her first Christmas without her kids, offering insights on how to honor your emotions while finding ways to reclaim joy during these tough times.

If you’re alone today – or on any major holiday – Jackie’s creative and practical ideas will help you feel better right now, even if you didn’t plan ahead. You’ll discover how taking even small steps can shift your mindset and improve your mood, even when you think that’s impossible. You'll also learn how you can celebrate a whole new you in the new year!

Don’t struggle through the holiday season! Take a break. Listen to this episode. You’ll feel better.

[NOTE: This episode originally ran as Episode 101, but it was so good, we just had to bring it back to spread more holiday cheer this year!]

About Jackie

Jackie Pilossoph is the creator and Editor-in-chief of Divorced Girl Smiling, a media company comprised of a website, podcast, mobile app and professional resources. Jackie holds a Masters degree in Broadcast Journalism and is a former television news reporter and features reporter and writer for the Chicago Tribune.

Where to Connect with Jackie
You can connect with Jackie on Facebook at Divorced Girl Smiling or in her Facebook Group, The Divorced Girl Smiling Group. She is on LinkedIn as Divorced Girl Smiling. You can also find her on her website at DivorcedGirlSmiling.com.

The DGS Club is no longer being offered. But new resources are always being added to the Divorced Girl Smiling website. Please check out the website today and discover how Divorced Girl Smiling can support your divorce journey.

Karen Covy is a Divorce Coach and Consultant, Lawyer, Author, and Speaker who is dedicated to helping people make the best decisions possible for themselves, their families, and their future - especially in stressful times. You can check out Karen's videos on YouTube.

You can connect with Karen on LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and on her own website at karencovy.com.

What if the biggest financial mistake you'll ever make isn't choosing the wrong investment … it's avoiding having the investment conversation altogether? Elke Rubach left traditional law practice to create a wealth advisory firm built on a radical idea: that financial planning fails when it ignores the human beings behind the numbers. Her approach emerged from the personal tragedy her family experienced when her father's death revealed how financially unprepared her family really was.

At the heart of Elke’s approach is a simple but uncomfortable truth: avoiding money conversations is still a decision. Financial lives, like homes, require regular maintenance. Wills, insurance, taxes, investments, and goals can’t run properly on autopilot. And when a crisis happens (divorce, illness, or death), your resilience increases when you’re prepared.

Whether you're contemplating staying in a marriage or leaving, financial clarity reveals the real "price of freedom." Wealth decreases when you prolong a conflict. But it increases when you’re informed and clear about your financial reality and willing to make decisions based on that knowledge.

If you’re ready to replace anxiety with agency - whether you’re partnered, single, or rebuilding - this conversation gives you a blueprint to start.

About Elke

Elke M. Rubach is the Founder and Principal of Rubach Wealth Holistic Family Advisors™, a Toronto-based firm helping successful families achieve clarity, control, and confidence in their financial lives. A former lawyer, Elke brings a sharp legal mind and a deep sense of empathy to her work, integrating wealth planning, tax strategy, and legacy design through a human lens. She is the host of the Get Your House in Order podcast, where she explores money, leadership, and purpose with thought leaders and change-makers. Passionate about giving back, Elke is also a dedicated philanthropist, co-chairing Fashion Heals for SickKids and championing causes that build stronger, more intentional communities.

Connect with Elke

You can connect with Elke on LinkedIn at Elke E Rubach and follow Elke on Instagram at Elke Rubach, Rubach Wealth and X at Rubach Wealth. For more information on working with Elke, visit her website at Rubach Wealth.

Karen Covy is a Divorce Coach and Consultant, Lawyer, Author, and Speaker who is dedicated to helping people make the best decisions possible for themselves, their families, and their future - especially in stressful times. You can check out Karen's videos on YouTube.

You can connect with Karen on LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and on her own website at karencovy.com.

Stuck in a slow, expensive divorce that seems to feed on confusion? Karen Arndt, CEO and co-founder of “What Would a Judge Say”, has created a groundbreaking service that's turning the traditional divorce process on its head. After watching countless couples drain their savings fighting over finances while navigating an opaque system that takes months or years to complete, Karen asked a radical question: What if you could skip straight to a judge's opinion before spending years in litigation? Then she and her ex-husband created a company that does exactly that.

“Whatwouldajudgesay.com” is a UK company that connects divorcing couples with real family court judges who provide opinions on asset division for a fixed fee … and they do it in just three months.

The service works by having couples submit their financial disclosures to judges who review the information and deliver a professional opinion on how the assets should be divided, exactly as if the case had gone to court. What makes the judge’s opinion particularly powerful is that it gives couples clear parameters for how they should settle their divorce based on actual legal standards, not emotions or wishful thinking.

While this service is currently available only in England and Wales, Karen is exploring expansion to the United States as well as other Commonwealth countries.

Whether you're a couple seeking clarity together or someone investigating options independently, this innovative approach offers something the traditional system rarely provides: certainty, affordability, and control over your own future.

About Karen

Karen Arndt is the Co-Founder and CEO of whatwouldajudgesay.com, a UK-based legal-tech startup transforming divorce settlements through judge-led clarity and AI innovation. Having lived and worked across London, Amsterdam, New York, Tokyo, Düsseldorf, Berlin, and Atlanta, she speaks fluent Dutch and German and has a deep appreciation for American culture — her son now lives in New York, and her ex-husband is based in Charlotte, North Carolina. Karen’s career spans IBM, Ogilvy, RTL, and BBC World, giving her a rare perspective on leadership, reinvention, and what it takes to build a business from the ground up across cultures and continents.

Connect with Karen

You can connect with Karen on LinkedIn at Karen Arndt and Facebook at What Would A Judge Say. You can follow Karen on Instagram at What Would A Judge Say and on X at What Would A Judge Say. To find out more about Karen’s work visit her website at What Would A Judge Say.

Karen Covy is a Divorce Coach and Consultant, Lawyer, Author, and Speaker who is dedicated to helping people make the best decisions possible for themselves, their families, and their future - especially in stressful times. You can check out Karen's videos on YouTube.

You can connect with Karen on LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and on her own website at karencovy.com.

Sometimes the hardest part of divorce is realizing you actually have choices. But that’s exactly where Rosemarie Ferrante begins. A seasoned family law attorney with more than 25 years of experience, Rosemarie shares how to divorce without court and how. mediation and Collaborative Divorce can transform your most painful transition into an opportunity for growth. Drawing from both her professional expertise and her own experience as a divorced mother of three, she reveals why even SHE wishes she'd done some things differently.

This discussion dives deeply into what mediation and Collaborative Divorce actually look like in practice, and they're not what most people assume. Rosemarie explains how couples can build custom teams of professionals (legal, financial, and emotional) tailored to their specific needs. Those teams enable a couple to navigate complex finances, address substance abuse issues, or learn how to have difficult conversations even if they haven’t communicated well in years.

If you or someone you know is in the beginning stages of divorce and you want to stay OUT of court, this podcast episode will help guide you to make the choices that will allow you to do exactly that.

About Rosemarie

Rosemarie Ferrante is a family attorney with over 25 years of experience, specializing in non-adversarial divorce through mediation and collaborative divorce. She believes families deserve compassionate, private processes for restructuring their lives, processes that honor relationships, reduce conflict, and protect children. Her goal is to guide families through divorce with compassion, providing the tools and resources they need for a healthier transition.

Rosemarie ensures that individuals have the emotional, financial, and legal support they need to move forward with confidence. She works with couples to create agreements that reflect fairness and respect, encouraging ongoing positive relationships between co-parents and their children.

Connect with Rosemarie

You can connect with Rosemarie on LinkedIn at Rosemarie Ferrante and on Facebook at Divorce Mediation Center of Fairfield County, LLC. And follow Rosemarie on YouTube at Divorce Media Center CT and on Instagram at Divorce Media Center CT. To find out more about Rosemarie’s work visit the website Divorce Mediation CT.

Karen Covy is a Divorce Coach and Consultant, Lawyer, Author, and Speaker who is dedicated to helping people make the best decisions possible for themselves, their families, and their future - especially in stressful times. You can check out Karen's videos on YouTube.

You can connect with Karen on LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and on her own website at karencovy.com.