Episodes

  • Ep: 108 - From Chaos to Service w/ Justin “Porky” Nolan (Part 1)

    Ep: 108 - From Chaos to Service w/ Justin “Porky” Nolan (Part 1)
    Oct 1 2026
    “Your mind is a dangerous neighbourhood. Don’t go in there alone.”Justin “Porky” Nolan knows what it means to lose your way & what it takes to find your way back.A talented boxer and rugby player, Justin spent years battling addiction, destructive habits and the consequences of his own decisions. Today, after many years of sobriety, he runs Sambar Ridge, a men’s retreat in Victoria’s High Country, helping other men rebuild their lives.In this deeply personal episode of Pushing Back Chaos, Paul and Justin reconnect as old friends, together with Kris, to explore addiction, recovery, brotherhood, faith and the power of service.Justin shares some hard-earned wisdom:“i’m a quick learner, but a fast forgetter”“Whose tail lights are you following?”“Words whisper. Actions thunder”“I can’t think my way into right thinking. I can only act my way into right thinking”Together, they explore the difference between discipline and lasting change, rebuilding trust, accepting responsibility and finding peace with your past.They also discuss Justin’s approach at Sambar Ridge, where physical, mental, emotional and spiritual development come together to help men reset, recover and rebuild.This is a conversation about more than getting sober. It’s about rebuilding a life worth living — and becoming someone who can help others do the same.Join the conversation. What resonated with you? Send us your questions, share your experiences and tell us what you’d like Kris, Paul and Justin to explore next.If there’s a person in your life who needs to hear this conversation, send them the episode. Repost it, share it with your mates and help us reach more widely.#PushingBackChaos #AddictionRecovery #Sobriety #PersonalResponsibility #HeroesMediaGrp Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hr and 8 mins
  • Ep: 107 - Don’t Miss the Life You’re Building

    Ep: 107 - Don’t Miss the Life You’re Building
    Sep 17 2026
    We spend years building careers, families, fitness, security and capability. But there’s a trap: What if parts of the life we’ve been working so hard to create are already here — and we’re too busy looking at the next problem to notice? In Episode 107, Paul and Kris sit down together in Australia after an extraordinary couple of weeks with family, old friends and some very good men. There have been fast cars, long drives, the Victorian High Country, the Murray River, Father’s Day in the countryside, and the NFL at the MCG. But the real story is the people, the conversations and the gratitude. This episode explores: ambition vs contentment; gratitude without complacency; friendship, fatherhood and service; stillness as the ability to notice; the Whole Ledger — holding unfinished problems and real blessings at the same time; the perspective that comes with 25 years since 9/11 and a life shaped by service. A key question: Who should you call, thank, visit or spend more time with while you still can? We’d love to hear your questions, disagreements, stories and reflections. If this episode makes you think of someone, send it to them or repost it. Expand the conversation. Push back the chaos. Build the life. Don’t forget to live it. #PushingBackChaos #PBC #Gratitude #Brotherhood #Friendship #Fatherhood #Leadership #Presence #Stillness #Veterans #Service #Purpose #Family #GoodLife #PersonalGrowth #September11 #NeverForge Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hr and 15 mins
  • PBC: 106 - Fast Cars, Slow Coffee, Good Men

    PBC: 106 - Fast Cars, Slow Coffee, Good Men
    Sep 10 2026
    The Men Beside You What makes some male friendships endure across distance, careers, family, and time? In this episode of Pushing Back Chaos, Kris and Melon reflect on their time together in Melbourne, the High Country, and along the Murray, sharing fast cars, coffee, hiking, hunting, boating, family, and plenty of long conversations. But underneath all of it is a bigger question: What do good men actually provide for one another? In This Episode What makes a real friend? The difference between a mate, a friend, and a brother — and the role of trust, loyalty, shared values, humour, and shared hardship. The capable man’s trap Self-reliance can become isolation. Sometimes the men who are best at carrying the load are the worst at allowing someone else to carry theirs. Build the Net Good men provide four things: Truth — someone willing to correct your heading. Load — someone willing to help carry what matters. Perspective — someone who can get you out of your own cockpit. Joy — someone who makes life better even when nothing is wrong. Friendship is reciprocal Who could you call at 0200? More importantly, would they know they could call you? A good friend doesn’t simply back you. Sometimes a good mate stops you. Distance, time & intentionality You don’t have to see someone every week to have a deep friendship. But there is a difference between distance and neglect. The Bigger Question Have we made friendship primarily about crisis support, rather than simply sharing a good life together? Takeaway Ask yourself: Who tells me the truth? Who carries the load? Who gives me perspective? Who brings me joy? Whose list am I on? Then call one mate who matters. Not because something is wrong. Because he matters. Final Thought Who are the men beside you — and whose list are you on? Next Episode We spend years building capable lives. The next question is: how do we make sure we don’t miss the life we’ve been building? #PushingBackChaos #TheMenBesideYou #Brotherhood #Connectedness #HeroesMediaGroup Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hr and 15 mins
  • EP: 105 - I’d Buy Me a Drink: Clean Relationships

    EP: 105 - I’d Buy Me a Drink: Clean Relationships
    Jul 23 2026
    The final chapter of the I’d Buy Me a Drink series brings everything together. Over the past five episodes, we’ve challenged you to take an honest look in the mirror, own your full ledger, accept reality without lowering your standards, build an internal barometer, and finally discover how that internal work transforms every relationship in your life. The truth is simple: you can’t build healthy relationships if you’re asking other people to fix what only you can heal. In this episode, Kris and Paul discuss what it means to show up without emotional debt, lead without needing validation, and build relationships from a place of strength instead of scarcity. In This Episode · Why private victory always comes before public influence. · The hidden cost of emotional debt in relationships. · What “quiet strength” really means and why it’s often misunderstood. · How clear boundaries actually create stronger relationships. · Why great leadership is about developing others, not proving yourself. · Parenting from guidance instead of control. · Building friendships without keeping score. · Creating partnerships where two whole people become even stronger together. Stories We Share · Paul reflects on receiving difficult feedback during a military deployment and how self-awareness allowed him to respond with curiosity instead of defensiveness. · Kris shares leading a diving program with twice the workload just one year before retirement, choosing transparency and trust over ego, resulting in one of the program’s most successful years. · Kris discusses a training safety incident and how calm accountability, not anger, became the catalyst for rebuilding standards and trust. · Kris also shares how intentional weekly walks with his fiancée have become a practical example of connection, communication, and choosing each other without distractions. Key Takeaways · Quiet strength isn’t weakness; it’s controlled capability. · Healthy relationships are built from surplus, not deficit. · Boundaries remove resentment and create trust. · Leaders who don’t need validation create stronger teams. · Children need authenticity more than perfection. · Stop keeping emotional scorecards. · Become someone you’d enjoy spending time with before expecting others to. The Five-Part Journey 1. The Mirror Test 2. The Full Ledger 3. Acceptance Without Drift 4. The Internal Barometer 5. Clean Relationships If you’ve followed this series from beginning to end, you’ve walked through a complete framework for becoming someone who can lead, serve, and love from a place of authenticity rather than insecurity. The work starts within, but its impact is felt by everyone around you. #PushingBackChaos #Leadership #HealthyRelationships #HeroesMediaGroup #HMG #PersonalGrowth Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hr and 18 mins
  • Ep: 104 - The Internal Barometer

    Ep: 104 - The Internal Barometer
    Mar 19 2026
    When External Validation Stops Working For most of our lives, the scoreboards are clear: Ranks Titles Promotions Praise They tell us we’re doing well. But at some point, something shifts. The applause fades… and the question becomes harder: Who are you when no one is clapping? In Episode 4 of the “I’d Buy Me a Drink” series, your hosts explore the moment when external scorecards stop regulating your sense of worth — and why developing an internal barometer becomes essential for leadership, fatherhood, and a life of integrity. This episode digs into: • Why success and praise eventually lose their power • The quiet danger of succeeding without inner alignment • How elite operators develop an internal compass under pressure • The shift from approval-seeking to self-trust • Why stillness can reveal better options than reaction At some point, every man must choose: External validation… or internal alignment. This conversation may challenge how you measure success. And it prepares the ground for the final episode of the series. The Path to Earned Self-Respect The Mirror Test The Whole Ledger Acceptance Without Drift The Internal Barometer Clean Relationships, Quiet Strength If this episode resonated: Follow the podcast Share it with someone who leads Leave a review to help others find the conversation #PushingBackChaos #PBCPodcast #HeroesMediaGroup #MasculineLeadership #Integrity #SelfLeadership #InnerAlignment #ResponsibleMen #MenWhoLead #PushBackChaos Series: I’d Buy Me a Drink Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hr and 5 mins
  • Ep: 103 - Acceptance Without Drift

    Ep: 103 - Acceptance Without Drift
    Mar 5 2026
    The question is: Are you correcting yourself — or attacking yourself? How do you accept who you are… without lowering your standards? In this episode, we unpack Acceptance Without Drift: Acceptance is a starting point — not a finish line. Self-hatred is not discipline. Compassion is not complacency. Real discipline isn’t built on shame. It’s built on responsibility. Two truths must coexist: “I am responsible.” “I am not perfect.” When you hold both, everything changes. We talk about: • Why shame can fuel a sprint — but never a lifetime • How identity drives action, and action drives outcome • Why stillness after a mistake creates better options • The leadership mindset that stabilizes teams under pressure Self-respect corrects behavior. Self-hatred attacks identity. There’s a difference. You don’t grow by hating yourself into submission. You grow by respecting yourself into action. That’s how we push back chaos. ⸻ Practical: The 3-Step Reset When you fall short: 1. Debrief the action — not the person 2. Pause before reacting 3. Build correction within 24 hours Acceptance without drift. Stand under the bar — and lift. #PushingBackChaos #PBC #HeroesMediaGroup #HMG #AcceptanceWithoutDrift#IdentityActionOutcome#SelfRespect#ResponsibleMen#DisciplinedLife#Stillness#MasculineLeadership#MenWhoLead Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hr and 8 mins
  • Ep: 102 - The Whole Ledger

    Ep: 102 - The Whole Ledger
    Feb 26 2026
    The question is: Are you managing the whole thing — or just the part that makes you look good? What changes when you stop hiding your weaknesses — even from yourself? In this episode, we unpack The Whole Ledger Principle: • Insecure men hide flaws. • Arrogant men deny them. • Grounded men account for them. Real confidence isn’t pretending you’re flawless. It’s managing reality. Every man has strengths. Every man has liabilities. The problem isn’t weakness — it’s weakness unmanaged. We talk about: • Why self-knowledge creates calm • How unacknowledged flaws leak into relationships • The power of saying, “Here’s where I’m dangerous — and here’s how I manage it.” Your circle doesn’t need perfection. It needs predictability. ⸻ Practical: The 3-Line Ledger Take 5 minutes and write: 1. One strength that makes you effective 2. One weakness that makes you dangerous 3. One system you use to manage it Confidence isn’t claiming perfection. It’s stewarding the whole ledger. That’s how we push back chaos. #PushingBackChaos #PBC # HeroesMediaGroup #HMG #WholeLedger #GroundedMen #MasculineLeadership #SelfGovernance #EmotionalMaturity #FaithDrivenMen #GrowthMindset #MenWhoLead #AccountabilityCulture Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hr and 2 mins
  • Ep: 101 - “I’d Buy Me a Drink” — The Path to Earned Self-Respect

    Ep: 101 - “I’d Buy Me a Drink” — The Path to Earned Self-Respect
    Feb 7 2026
    Part 1— The Mirror Test Can you look at your life honestly — strengths and failures — and still choose yourself? In this episode of Pushing Back Chaos, we start where real stability begins: self-respect. Not ego. Not self-hype. But the ability to assess yourself accurately without tearing yourself apart. Most men don’t lack confidence — they’ve outsourced their worth. To approval. To performance. To status, success, or validation that never fully settles the nervous system. We explore: • Why self-respect is different from ego • How outsourcing your worth creates emotional instability • The difference between liking yourself and excusing yourself • Why earned self-regard — not affirmation — is what actually grounds a man This conversation isn’t about self-attack or self-justification. It’s about truth without abandonment. Because if you can’t sit with yourself in silence, nothing else will ever feel settled. This episode opens the door without threatening identity — inviting reflection instead of defensiveness — and lays the foundation for everything that follows. Join the Conversation: Follow us on Instagram, Facebook or message us directly — we read every one. If this episode made a difference, please share it with someone who needs to hear it. And if you haven’t yet, drop us a review — it helps more people find this space. #PushingBackChaos #PBC #Leadership #ConsciousLiving #HMG #HeroesMediaGrp #Brotherhood #Reflection #MenWalkingTogether #Selfworth Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    1 hr and 7 mins