• STRUGGLING WITH BAD HABITS

  • Jul 15 2024
  • Length: 21 mins
  • Podcast

STRUGGLING WITH BAD HABITS  By  cover art

STRUGGLING WITH BAD HABITS

  • Summary

  • Leo, you change the structure of your heart even in your 70s by doing the right things, exercising, eating, and sleeping.

    Change your mindset. It isn’t necessarily easy, but you can change your style and do something different to shake things up.

    Leo talks about a woman he knew who would deliberately use her opposite, non-dominant hand to help stimulate her brain for something different. Coach jumps in because he brushes his teeth with his left hand in the morning and shaves with his left hand to stimulate that part of his brain.

    Leo is right-handed and deals with his left hand when playing cards.

    Leo points out that you don't want to give up the power of running the show; you want to control your habits or create habits that work for you.

    The coach talks about several more destructive habits, like procrastination and distracting yourself, which can also be a form of procrastination. Other include smoking, poor eating habits, excessive drinking,

    Old messages learned and absorbed from family, school, and others, this early learning becomes automatic.


    An old Jesuit says, “Give me the child up to age 7, and I show you the person.”

    We pick up all kinds of beliefs in our childhood and our lives about what we shouldn't do and what we can and can't do. Leo talks about a woman he met from his high school class. There was a supermarket shopping, and he asked her if she was going to the class reunion, and her response was oh no “ that's for students and rich people.” So the question arises: what stories is she telling herself, and where did she get these stories? Denis and Leo decided to do a separate podcast on the stories we tell ourselves and how they affect our lives.

    How do you break a bad habit?

    First, you must have an attitude or belief that you can change.

    Remind yourself that you are capable. I graduated from high school, went to college, served in the military, and started a small business; whatever you have done or learned proves that you can do things you can change. That belief or those beliefs are really important.

    It goes back to the growth mindset, as Carol Dweck wrote in her book “Mindset,”

    Leo points out that we're conditioned to commiserate and tend not to look for the positive as much as possible. If you say too much positive, people will look at you like what's up with them.

    We tend to want to commiserate...share misery,

    Leo mentions Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT). Developed by Albert Ellis, Ph.D. REBT is a form of psychotherapy that helps a person identify self-defeating thoughts and feelings, challenge the nature of irrational and unproductive feelings, and replace them with healthier, more productive beliefs.

    Albert Ellis’Model is ABC

    • Activity, or event, what happened?
    • Beliefs about the activity or event
    • Consequences, our feelings, and behaviors in response to adversity caused by our beliefs

    Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) focuses on changing irrational beliefs that lead to emotional and behavioral issues. The core of REBT is the ABC model, which stands for Activating Event (A), Beliefs (B), and Consequences (C). Here's a brief overview:

    1. Activating Event (A): Any event or situation triggers a reaction. For example, someone was criticizing your work.
    2. Beliefs (B): These are your thoughts and beliefs about the activating event. Often, these beliefs can be irrational, such as thinking, "I must never be criticized" or "I am worthless if someone criticizes me."
    3. Consequences (C): These are the emotional and behavioral responses resulting from your beliefs, such as feeling depressed or avoiding similar situations in the future.

    REBT adds two more steps to help address and change these irrational

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