Sexual intimacy can play an important role in emotional connection, relationship satisfaction, and overall well-being. Relationship therapist Laura How joins Dr. Liz Hale and Dr. Dave Schramm to explore sexless marriages, differences in sexual desire, and the physical and emotional benefits of a healthy sexual relationship. Laura shares practical insights for understanding desire, talking openly about intimacy, and making your marriage a greater priority. Discover how curiosity, intentional connection, and playfulness can help couples rebuild intimacy and create a stronger marriage.

The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this podcast do not necessarily reflect the views of the Utah Marriage Commission.

Takeaway of the Day

• Laura How: Make your marriage the project of your life. Prioritize personal growth and create a relationship that feels playful, joyful, and energizing. A strong marriage is possible when couples intentionally nurture their connection.
• Liz Hale: A healthy sexual connection offers powerful benefits for individuals, couples, and families. Liz emphasizes the positive influence a loving, connected marriage can have on children and encourages women to recognize their power to strengthen their relationships.
• Dave Schramm: Relationships require intentional attention. When work, children, stress, and technology take over, emotional and physical connection can slowly fade. Couples need to talk openly, make time for each other, and remember that a lack of attention can lead to a loss of connection.

Laura's Links:

Website: https://laurahow.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/laurahow/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@LauraHow

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@laurahowcounselling

X: https://x.com/laurahow

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/laurahowcounsellor/

Happy Hacks: 101 Science-Backed Ways to Boost Happiness, Reduce Stress, and Build a More Meaningful Life.

Available now starting at 99¢ on Amazon and Dave's Book Store

Written by Dr. Dave Schramm, this practical and uplifting new book offers simple, research-based strategies to help you build greater happiness, strengthen resilience, reduce

The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this podcast do not necessarily reflect the views of the Utah Marriage Commission.

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

Strongermarriage.org

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm:

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale:

http://www.drlizhale.com/

We flip the mic and let Liz and Rex interview Dave about his new book, Happy Hacks, and the science-backed habits that make joy more durable in real life. We dig into why happiness matters for marriages and families, how small choices build momentum, and why compassion and kindness are the glue of a stronger marriage connection.

• why happiness is not toxic positivity and still involves choice through perspective
• why Dave wrote a “hacks” book and how short, simple practices beat jargon
• the structure of each hack: what it is, why it works, try this today, what if, bottom line
• gratitude and kindness as the quickest ripple effect for well-being and relationships
• “Text Two Before 10” and why delayed gratitude can be surprisingly powerful
• foundational habits that shape mood: sunlight, hydration, protein, sleep, stopping doomscrolling
• “happy hack attacks” that steal joy: comparison, rumination, avoiding emotions, materialism
• purpose beyond the self as a buffer against stress and a path to meaning
• hack 101: writing a letter to your future self to live with more intention now
• the key to a stronger marriage connection: compassion and kindness

Dave's Resources:

Website: https://www.drdaveschramm.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drdaveschramm/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrDaveUSU

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCUgmEM9eheDC5AbNYUB3ENA/videos

X: https://x.com/DrDaveUSU

Happy Hacks: 101 Science-Backed Ways to Boost Happiness, Reduce Stress, and Build a More Meaningful Life.

Available now starting at 99¢ on Amazon and Dave's Book Store

Written by Dr. Dave Schramm, this practical and uplifting new book offers simple, research-based strategies to help you build greater happiness, strengthen resilience, reduce

The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this podcast do not necessarily reflect the views of the Utah Marriage Commission.

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

Strongermarriage.org

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm:

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale:

http://www.drlizhale.com/

Discovering infidelity can be one of the most painful experiences a couple faces. In this episode, Dr. Bill Bumberry shares practical guidance and hope for couples navigating betrayal trauma and rebuilding trust. Drawing on decades of clinical experience and the Gottman Method, Bill explains the three key phases of healing after infidelity—atonement, attunement, and attachment—and offers actionable strategies for restoring safety, connection, and commitment. Whether you're recovering from betrayal or looking to strengthen your relationship against future threats, this conversation provides valuable insight and encouragement.

• defining infidelity as betraying an agreement plus secrecy
• why social media and dating apps make hiding easier
• how friendships drift into emotional and physical affairs
• common trauma responses for the hurt partner, including hypervigilance and dysregulation
• why remorse has to become active compassion to restore safety
• using the Gottman phases of atonement, attunement, and attachment
• deciding which details help and which details harm early on
• how avoidance and negative sentiment override set the stage for disconnection
• what to consider when talking with kids at different ages
• daily connection rituals that matter most, including the first two minutes together
• loyalty as an active practice, especially when your partner is not present

Happy Hacks: 101 Science-Backed Ways to Boost Happiness, Reduce Stress, and Build a More Meaningful Life.

Available now starting at 99¢ on Amazon and Dave's Book Store

Written by Dr. Dave Schramm, this practical and uplifting new book offers simple, research-based strategies to help you build greater happiness, strengthen resilience, reduce

The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this podcast do not necessarily reflect the views of the Utah Marriage Commission.

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

Strongermarriage.org

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm:

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale:

http://www.drlizhale.com/

We sit down with psychotherapist Kirsten Davidson to unpack why couples drift into disconnection and how Internal Family Systems therapy can help us lead ourselves with more clarity, compassion, and courage. We challenge the stories we tell ourselves in conflict, practice speaking from “parts” instead of blame, and lay out simple shifts that rebuild real connection.

• assumptions driving communication breakdowns and unnecessary hurt
• avoiding hard talks out of fear of the truth and discomfort
• using IFS “parts” language to create space and reduce shame
• defining self-energy and what “self-led” looks like at home
• turning fights into dialogue instead of debate
• choosing radical honesty about our limits and patterns
• why couples counseling works better when we go earlier
• tips for newlyweds and engaged couples to benchmark what works
• resources to learn IFS, including Richard Schwartz’s No Bad Parts
• how we build hope when couples feel exhausted and stuck

Happy Hacks: 101 Science-Backed Ways to Boost Happiness, Reduce Stress, and Build a More Meaningful Life.

Available now starting at 99¢ on Amazon and Dave's Book Store

Written by Dr. Dave Schramm, this practical and uplifting new book offers simple, research-based strategies to help you build greater happiness, strengthen resilience, reduce

The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this podcast do not necessarily reflect the views of the Utah Marriage Commission.

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

Strongermarriage.org

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm:

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale:

http://www.drlizhale.com/

We sit down with marriage and family therapist Andrea Dindinger to name the repeat fight loops that hijack connection and to practice simple ways to interrupt them before they turn mean. We walk away with concrete tools for calmer conflict, deeper intimacy, and more intentional partnership that ripples into the next generation.

• naming the “loop” as the problem, not each other
• spotting triggers and the deeper needs underneath them
• using “bookmark” to pause conflict and return at a specific time
• building trust by always coming back to the bookmarked talk
• leading the moment by listening without taking it personally
• using a firm “stop” paired with reassurance and safety
• choosing curiosity before defensiveness as a relationship superpower
• rethinking intimacy through “sexy logistics” and mental load
• trying a 21-day experiment of small daily connection practices
• letting go of perfection and focusing on repair and accountability
• creating a shared vision and doing an annual relationship review

Happy Hacks: 101 Science-Backed Ways to Boost Happiness, Reduce Stress, and Build a More Meaningful Life.

Available now starting at 99¢ on Amazon and Dave's Book Store

Written by Dr. Dave Schramm, this practical and uplifting new book offers simple, research-based strategies to help you build greater happiness, strengthen resilience, reduce

The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this podcast do not necessarily reflect the views of the Utah Marriage Commission.

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

Strongermarriage.org

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm:

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale:

http://www.drlizhale.com/

We sit down with therapist Josh O’Tani to talk about pornography use as a couples issue and why secrecy can wound a relationship as deeply as infidelity. We map the shame and anger cycle that keeps partners stuck, then share practical ways to rebuild trust through curiosity, empathy, and consistent repair.

• Reframing pornography use as relational and systemic, not just individual behavior
• Pornography as a coping strategy for difficult emotions and how avoidance spills into marriage
• The negative interaction cycle after betrayal, including shame, fixing, withdrawal, anger, and distrust
• Why empty promises fail and how trust rebuilds through time and consistency
• Why secrecy matters more than the content for many couples
• Confessing early versus being discovered and the impact on safety and vulnerability
• Betrayal trauma responses, including volatility and PTSD-like symptoms
• Simple language shifts that validate pain without defensiveness
• Clarifying values and agreeing on goals, abstinence versus negotiated boundaries
• Tools from emotionally focused therapy, enactments, and impact versus intent
• The mindset shift that you don’t have to heal alone, and why professional help accelerates progress
• Where to find Josh and his resources at Big Valley Therapy

Happy Hacks: 101 Science-Backed Ways to Boost Happiness, Reduce Stress, and Build a More Meaningful Life.

Available now starting at 99¢ on Amazon and Dave's Book Store

Written by Dr. Dave Schramm, this practical and uplifting new book offers simple, research-based strategies to help you build greater happiness, strengthen resilience, reduce

The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this podcast do not necessarily reflect the views of the Utah Marriage Commission.

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

Strongermarriage.org

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm:

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale:

http://www.drlizhale.com/

Sexual intimacy changes over the arc of a long-term relationship, and treating every lull like a crisis often adds pressure that makes things worse. We talk with sex and relationship coach Keeley Rankin about how to rebuild closeness through curiosity, kinder communication, and a better understanding of what each partner actually desires.

• Defining what “sexless marriage” can mean and why the couple’s definition matters most
• Moving beyond frequency to sexual satisfaction and quality of connection
• Common reasons couples drift including stress, life transitions, and emotional safety
• Starting the conversation outside the bedroom and making it ongoing
• Avoiding blame, guilt, and pressure that shut down desire
• Using Erotic Blueprints to talk about turn-ons and touch styles
• Why many couples become touchless before becoming sexless
• What healthy long-term sexuality often looks like including playfulness and openness
• Keeping the spark alive with kindness, respect, and curiosity
• Where to find Keely’s courses and support

Happy Hacks: 101 Science-Backed Ways to Boost Happiness, Reduce Stress, and Build a More Meaningful Life.

Available now starting at 99¢ on Amazon and Dave's Book Store

Written by Dr. Dave Schramm, this practical and uplifting new book offers simple, research-based strategies to help you build greater happiness, strengthen resilience, reduce

The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this podcast do not necessarily reflect the views of the Utah Marriage Commission.

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

Strongermarriage.org

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm:

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale:

http://www.drlizhale.com/

We talk honestly about grief, loss, and why love can keep shaping us even after someone is gone. We share research and real stories that reframe mourning as both painful and meaningful, then land on practical ways to build a relationship that strengthens you now and later.
• why grief is complex across mind and body
• what predicts higher grief levels in young widowhood
• loss-oriented versus restoration-oriented coping
• how relationship length and intimacy relate to grief impact
• continuing bonds and why remembering can help
• why comparing losses creates a harmful grief hierarchy
• how divorce and other losses fit the same grief principles
• why grief can feel like physical pain in the brain
• emotional estate planning through a relational piggy bank
• three daily practices: time, talk, togetherness

Happy Hacks: 101 Science-Backed Ways to Boost Happiness, Reduce Stress, and Build a More Meaningful Life.

Available now starting at 99¢ on Amazon and Dave's Book Store

Written by Dr. Dave Schramm, this practical and uplifting new book offers simple, research-based strategies to help you build greater happiness, strengthen resilience, reduce

The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this podcast do not necessarily reflect the views of the Utah Marriage Commission.

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

Strongermarriage.org

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm:

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale:

http://www.drlizhale.com/