Episodes

  • 99: Bonus Episode: Autism (actually) Speaks, An Interview Mashup

    99: Bonus Episode: Autism (actually) Speaks, An Interview Mashup
    Jul 19 2024
    In today’s episode, you’ll hear from three guests about their autism experience and their perspectives on common stereotypes about autism around communication, relationships, and more. This is a bonus follow-up to our most recent episode about autism with Kaelynn Partlow. Join us as we explore autism further with Syd, Atlas, and Sapphire. I’m happy to have them here to share their insights. Show Highlights: Meet Syd, a 22-year-old post-grad student who is self-diagnosed as autistic and ADHD: Thoughts on relationships, unmasking, and “quality over quantity” Being yourself in a world that isn’t always welcoming to your kind Cultivating a special (and rare!) interest in learning and education Meet Atlas, who was self-diagnosed at age 16: Identifying with autistic characters on a favorite TV show What it’s like to pick up on other people’s perceptions of your weirdness Autistic traits that Atlas recognized from childhood about obsessive routines Meet Sapphire, who was identified as autistic in 5th grade but not diagnosed until age 19: Nuances around communication, conversations, and awkward silences The common misunderstandings about what a relationship with an autistic person can be like Using an “Excel spreadsheet in my brain” to catalog each person Relationships and the need for “alone time” to decompress Sapphire’s advice to parents who are hesitant to have their child tested/diagnosed Resources and Links: Connect with KC: Website, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: www.strugglecare.com/promo-codes.
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    33 mins
  • 98: Autism (actually) Speaks with Kaelynn Partlow

    98: Autism (actually) Speaks with Kaelynn Partlow
    Jul 8 2024
    Happy Autism Awareness Month! Yes–I know that was in April, but I have ADHD and am easily distracted. I’ve procrastinated for more than a year on doing some really great episodes about autism because I want to do justice to this topic. I’m starting with an amazing TikTokker, Kaelynn Partlow. I’ve followed her for quite a while, but you might know Kaelynn from Netflix’s Love on the Spectrum. Kaelynn shares about autism from her personal experience and her professional work with autistic kids. She is a therapist who was diagnosed at age 10 with autism, dyslexia, dyscalculia, and ADHD. Her background provides a unique perspective on advocacy that is worth our attention. Join us! Show Highlights: Specific criteria (from the DSM) for autism—and Kaelynn’s experience with each one Persistent deficits in social communication and interaction Restrictive or repeated behavior Kaelynn’s experience in making and maintaining friendships while growing up and now Masking: What it is and what it feels like The nuances of eye contact: not enough or too much? All autistic behaviors ARE human behaviors. Stimming from an autistic perspective and a non-autistic perspective Kaelynn’s special interests, routines, and self-imposed “rules” Kaelynn’s experience with sensory issues: noises, fabrics, etc. Kaelynn’s perspective on physical touch (Most autistic people don’t like physical touch.) Kaelynn’s diagnosis at age 10 (after the assumption that she was genius-level intelligent.) Autism is NOT an invisible disability! Kaelynn’s reflection on her childhood and helpful therapies and treatments Kaelynn’s thoughts on common ADA controversies Kaelynn’s advice to those who might fear being “labeled” if they pursue testing for themselves or their child What Kaelynn sees as the biggest misunderstanding about autism today Resources and Links: Connect with Kaelynn Partlow: TikTok, Instagram, YouTube, and Facebook **Look for Kaelynn’s book, Life on the Bridge, to be released this summer! Connect with KC: Website, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: www.strugglecare.com/promo-codes.
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    1 hr and 11 mins
  • 97: In Defense of Video Games (for parents of gamers) with Derrick Hoard, LMFT

    97: In Defense of Video Games (for parents of gamers) with Derrick Hoard, LMFT
    Jun 24 2024
    We are back for Part 2 of a fascinating discussion with Derrick Hoard, a licensed marriage and family therapist, TikTokker, and video game aficionado. We left off in last week’s episode talking about how some people rely too heavily on gaming for their coping skills in life and how “mindful gaming” can go beyond simply pushing buttons and help in many ways. The conflict over video games extends beyond partner relationships and definitely leads to challenges for parents and their kids. Let’s explore this topic with Derrick! Show Highlights: Myths and misconceptions about video games from a parent’s perspective Being mindful means using as many of the five senses as possible and being purposeful. Video games can lead to emotional connection, learning, and many problem-solving skills. Derrick’s perspective on gamers who play a variety of games: good or bad? Thoughts on the benefits of games like Skyrim and Mass Effect The value of a collaborative approach by parents who get involved in a child’s gaming life respectfully and appropriately The benefits of video games for neurodivergent kids, overall mental health, and therapeutic approaches The key for parents of gamers: accepting video games as ways to promote mindfulness, deep conversations, true interest, growth, skill development, curiosity, and maturity Resources and Links: Connect with Derrick Hoard: Website, TikTok, and the Mindful Gaming Podcast Connect with KC: Website, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: www.strugglecare.com/promo-codes.
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    42 mins
  • 96: In Defense of Video Games (for partners of gamers) with Derrick Hoard, LMFT

    96: In Defense of Video Games (for partners of gamers) with Derrick Hoard, LMFT
    Jun 17 2024
    Welcome to Struggle Care, where we talk about all things individual and systemic that affect your life, wellness, and mental health. Joining me is Derrick Hoard, a licensed marriage and family therapist, TikTokker, and video game aficionado. I’ve followed him since 2020, and I love his thoughts and perspectives. Today’s topic, video games and relationships, stirs up some strong reactions and opinions, but you will walk away from this episode with a fresh and thoughtful view of the hobbies we all enjoy in our lives. Let’s get into it! Show Highlights: Video games are misunderstood and not recognized for what they are—the most beautiful, immersive forms of storytelling that exist. Men can get in touch with emotions through playing video games. Video games get unjustly blamed for communication problems in relationships. Video games comprise a safe space of non-judgment where one can feel confident and competent. Thoughts about men in therapy, gender dynamics, and emotional labor Consideration and honesty in relationships about our hobbies Society’s expectation of productivity leads us to feel shame and guilt about our hobbies. This is so wrong! Understanding how to have honest and authenticity in our relationships—from the start Red flags to look for when video games (or other obsessive hobbies) become our ONLY coping skills in life3 Resources and Links: Connect with Derrick Hoard: Website, TikTok, and the Mindful Gaming Podcast Connect with KC: Website, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: www.strugglecare.com/promo-codes.
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    40 mins
  • 95: How to Bring Sexy Back with Lindley Gentile, LMFT

    95: How to Bring Sexy Back with Lindley Gentile, LMFT
    Jun 10 2024
    Do you want to bring sexy back into your life? This concept encompasses much more than actual sex, but it reaches to the inner depths of a woman’s core identity, vitality, and attitudes about life. This episode was prompted by the response to a recent TikTok in which I commented about how I’ve rediscovered things about myself here in my late 30s as my kids are a bit older and I have more time to myself. The response was big, with many questions about what I’ve done. I hate to say that there really is no big secret, but this topic is well worth exploring, so I’m bringing in my good friend, Lindley Gentile, a licensed marriage and family therapist. She is an expert who works specifically with women around rediscovering their sexiness, or perhaps, learning to discover it for the first time. Show Highlights: Contributing factors to why women lose their individuality and sexiness The roles women fall into throughout life’s phases—without any renegotiation with their partner Sexiness in identity is about MUCH more than having sex. Being “turned on” is about aliveness, vitality, positivity, and a vibration of your soul. Care tasks create a barrier to pleasure. Sex is like a playground for fun and pleasure, and the aging woman can have more fun at the playground. Aging women, what they wear, and feeling sexy Sexiness is about energy and how you feel. False messages from society around fatphobia, suppression, and ideology Fantasy is a gift and a power that can overcome our tendency to overthink. Lindley’s starting point with women who want to rediscover their sexiness Lindley’s recommended reading for every woman: Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski Resources and Links: Connect with Lindley Gentile: Website, TikTok, and Austin Couples Concierge Counseling Connect with KC: Website, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: www.strugglecare.com/promo-codes.
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    41 mins
  • 94: Making the Outdoors Inclusive with Parker Bushman

    94: Making the Outdoors Inclusive with Parker Bushman
    Jun 3 2024
    As usual, we are talking about all things mental health, wellness, and topics that matter to us both individually and systemically. I’m excited to be joined by Parker Bushman, the founder and CEO of Ecoinclusive Strategies and the Inclusive Journeys Guide. Ecoinclusive Strategies is a consulting firm that works with conservation-based organizations, environmental organizations, and nonprofits around diversity, equality, and inclusion. Join us! Show Highlights: Nature should be free and accessible to ALL! The existing disparities in neighborhoods, tree cover, park access, and open spaces Racist roots of the conservation movement Messages of elitism among “outdoorsy” people Things that have been baked into our ideas about who gets to be outside and enjoy it–We need to break down the barriers! Thoughts about able-ism and outdoor spaces Parker’s consulting work with organizations doing wildland restoration, community engagement, and DEI work Building community through engagement, information, collaboration, and empowerment Systemic issues that prevent outdoor access Parker’s advice to everyone about finding outdoor activities that you enjoy Resources and Links: Connect with Parker Bushman and Ecoinclusive Strategies: Website, Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok Connect with KC: Website, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: www.strugglecare.com/promo-codes.
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    47 mins
  • 93: Trad Wives and the Leisure Class with Professor Neil Shyminsky

    93: Trad Wives and the Leisure Class with Professor Neil Shyminsky
    May 28 2024
    We are continuing with the topic of trad wives, but we are taking a different angle in this conversation. I’m joined by Professor Neil Shyminsky, who is an English professor at Cambrian College in Sudbury, Ontario. He doesn’t teach a lot about literature but likes to focus on media studies, gender/sexuality studies, and socio-political thought. We begin with a clip of Professor Neil explaining the concept of the “leisure class” as it relates to trad wife content. Join us! Show Highlights: The “other” side of trad wife content: an idealized performance of domesticity and romanticization of a woman’s role Professor Neil defines “the leisure class.” Don’t always believe the story the camera shows! (It’s all carefully curated content!) Social signals in how we “perform” our gender Trad wives as the moral purity status symbol of their husband’s godliness and enjoyers of God’s richest blessings from living a life of submission Thinking critically is key to understanding the truth about the values they promote. The difference between liking traditionally feminine things and being a content creator who makes active choices about how they present their enjoyment of traditionally feminine things The comparison between trad wife content and MLMs Professor Neil’s advice: “Be thoughtful and self-reflective in what you consume.” Resources and Links: Connect with Professor Neil Shyminsky: TikTok, Instagram, X, and LinkedIn Connect with KC: Website, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: www.strugglecare.com/promo-codes.
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    51 mins
  • 92: Trad Wives: The Psychology of Anti-Feminism with Dr. Lesley Cook

    92: Trad Wives: The Psychology of Anti-Feminism with Dr. Lesley Cook
    May 20 2024
    Buckle up for this one! We are discussing the interesting topic of trad wives, the psychology of anti-feminism, and the pushback/feedback we are seeing on TikTok. If you aren’t sure what any of that means, stay with us, and we will explain. I’m joined by my good friend and frequent guest on the show, clinical psychologist, Dr. Lesley Cook. Show Highlights: A montage of trad wife audio content The overriding philosophy of trad wife content: the good way vs. the bad way (with no in-between) KC’s definition of a trad wife: “a woman who chooses to stay home, submit to her husband, and embrace traditional gender roles because they believe God says they will be happier” (usually with undertones of homeschooling, homesteading, and political/religious agendas) The correlation between mainstream marketing, multi-level marketing, and trad wife philosophy: they all create the myth around what they are trying to sell The psychology of instability, isolation, loneliness, vulnerability, and a lack of belonging common in the trad wife movement Too much feminism OR not enough feminism?? Our responsibility as a global community of women to the problems of patriarchy Patriarchy, the myth, and the marketing campaign Scenarios in which a trad wife is trapped, isolated, overtaxed, and overwhelmed—but still believes the myth Traps that pop up in many areas with exploitive systems that can all be tied to money How we are consuming trad wife content with a romanticized view of the false narrative Resources and Links: Connect with Dr. Lesley Cook: TikTok Connect with KC: Website, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook Get KC’s book, How to Keep House While Drowning We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: www.strugglecare.com/promo-codes.
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    48 mins