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Submarine and A Roach

Submarine and A Roach

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Nigeria's #1 Comedy Podcast aka The Funniest Podcast in Nigeria Follow us on twitter: @Subma_Roach @_Kojoo @TmtisClutch @MayowaIdowu Follow us on IG: @submaroach @TmtisClutch @kalakuta.koj @oluwamayowaidowuCulture Custodian
Episodios
  • Episode 236: "Nothing to see here — yet"
    Nov 18 2025

    Join Tmt, Mayowa & Koj on Submarine and A Roach—Nigeria’s funniest podcast and Nigeria’s #1 comedy podcast—for Episode 236, “Nothing to see here — yet.”

    Love isn’t dead; it’s everywhere, even on Twitter. TMT opens with a Sunday sermon on tenderness before the boys autopsy the week’s millennial exodus—timelines scrubbed, handles vanished, and a decade of tweets dug up like generational curses. “Chaos is a ladder,” they joke, then climb right into it: cancel culture vs. shamelessness, victimhood logic, and why the internet keeps scoring real life in W’s and L’s like it’s monkey post.

    They pivot to the fan–artist contract after the Burna Boy clip—customers might pay for tickets, but empathy is priceless—then get properly paranoid about platforms: encrypt the DMs and encrypt the search bar. Political mess leaks in as the boys dig into Epstein, Trump, and BIG BEAUTIFUL BILL.

    Music ties the bow: a fresh look at SARZ’s album (executive brilliance vs. production flex), Odunsi’s cinematic rollout, the Wale Afrobeats viral moment, and flowers for emerging artists—Deji Osikoya and Ayoade Bamgboye. It’s love amid chaos, Lagos humor with global stakes, and a reminder that outside the outrage machine, there’s grass, real life, and rice at home.

    Press play now—touch grass later.

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    1 h y 12 m
  • Episode 235: "Detty December is Human Trafficking"
    Nov 11 2025

    Submarine and A Roach — Nigeria’s funniest podcast and the #1 comedy podcast in Nigeria — presents “Detty December is Human Trafficking,” hosted by TMT & Koj.

    Every December, Lagos becomes a conveyor belt of bodies, bottles, and bravado—an economy of daytime festivals that start too late for the sun, beach days that turn into boat-hopping on the Lagos Lagoon, and selfies in the red-light district otherwise known as Lagos traffic. It’s our annual rite of passage: equal parts pilgrimage and punishment.

    The boys build a Detty December checklist: stuffy clubs with famously disorderly queues; Russian roulette with fake alcohol; concerts that begin at 3 a.m. and stages that collapse by 3 a.m.; and the not-so-subtle deployment of Nigerian police by private citizens—like Pokémon.

    There’s wedding culture, too: the old era of joyful gate-crashing is fading under inflation, replaced by a dystopian hustle where IJGBs and culture tourists buy access to “authentic” Nigerian weddings. TMT’s PSA is simple: if you purchase a ticket to crash a wedding because of an IG ad made on Canva, expect hands. Koj counters that the market will protect anyone willing to buy tables at weddings like it’s Rhythm Unplugged.

    Climate anxiety hovers over the festivities: rain bleeding into November, potentially signaling higher heat levels in December, and a city with a track record of not solving environmental crises—before the conversation pivots to Sanwo-Olu at Lagos Fashion Week, modeling a “sustainable” aesthetic. You can’t spell APC without AC, so APC will cool the globe.

    The hosts resurrect the word “chassis”—a car term upgraded into a compliment—to show how Nigerianisms morph in real time. Ultimately, like Detty December itself, language is just infrastructure for what we really want: to be seen, to be inside, to say, “I survived.”

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    1 h y 2 m
  • Episode 234: "Meek & Horny"
    Nov 4 2025

    Join Koj, TMT & Mayowa on Submarine and A Roach—Nigeria’s funniest podcast and Nigeria’s #1 comedy podcast—for Episode 234, “Meek & Horny.” It’s a high-energy catch-up that zigzags from Lagos banter to Toronto life, politics, and pure nonsense—nimble like Simone Biles.

    The boys open with a chaotic drink check (green tea, Heineken 0.0, Lasena Water, and tales of expired zero-alcohol beer), plus a medicinal detour into Aboniki and why “stiff” needs context. From there, Koj’s moving diaries turn into a love letter to rent-controlled Toronto apartments, outrageous building amenities, and plotting bike rides on waterfront paths.

    We get an Ibadan classic: the gardener caught doing thirst traps in the boss’s pool—a WhatsApp-era parable told in Yoruba (“wé”) about boundaries, class, and comedy. Then it’s culture and current affairs: royal family headlines, U.S. threats toward Nigeria, and why media framing around Boko Haram is messy—plus a reminder to value reporting over outrage cycles.

    Internet culture shows up too: OnlyFans as a business, a Pornhub developer on LinkedIn, and a stray alté pregnancy rumor that somehow invaded dreamland. The episode closes on fatherhood, friendship, apartment hunting, and the eternal tension between being—well, meek & horny.

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    1 h y 25 m
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