Welcome to the Twilight Zone, but not an interesting one. A listener shares their hate for a pet that wakes them up in the middle of the night. Arik understands, as his cat likes to act like Chevy Chase with the Christmas Tree. Arik doesn't like hairballs or the sound of choking on the carpet. Carol is experiencing hot flashes, thanks to Mother Nature.

It's easier than ever to identify dumb people, and it isn't based on their educational qualifications. Arik enjoys the end pieces of bread; it feels like he's pushing a bit, and Carol wonders if he's tossing salad. Paul starts to ¨submit to the bits¨ and Carol brings out her ¨cat¨. You'll be happy when you reach the butt of this episode.

Perhaps it's flea season, and Arik is pushing to be the worst podcast in the history of podcasts. Paulie realizes this is just a part-time job and goes on a rant about a company that might be an educational center in Asia. Happy Labor Day, folks, and welcome to the gig economy. Part-time jobs that feel like full-time jobs are definitely put on the top of The Hate Napkin. It looks like the end of this loaf is tainted. Let's hope there's a Season Two, folks. Happy New Year 2024!

This episode starts with a proper promotion for our sponsor. Carol feels bad about the massive attention Burt Korn, Alabama has gotten from this podcast.

Arik begins with bad driver's test questions. If you are getting a learner's permit, do you have to know the maximum weight of a vehicle for a commercial driver's license? The answer: who gives a Flying J? Additionally, if Lindsey Graham shows up in a crosswalk, do you speed up?

Arik doesn't realize that he isn't the only one using a one exit shortcut. He uses it four times a day and doesn't understand why it is busy. We aren't sure if it's just the traffic being slow. This pause in rational thinking is brought to you by Come-And-Go.

Glory Holes take over most of the rest of this episode. Arik helps his contractor understand why there are holes in the bathroom stalls. Beads as entryways to bathrooms have been added to The Hate Napkin. Arik hasn't thought enough about Glory Holes, and he believes Hollywood is avoiding the topic.

Just when you think this episode couldn't get any dirtier, somehow sex with socks ends up on The Hate Napkin. Also, the college multipurpose go-to sock, and any sock not being used for its proper purpose, goes on the list. Send your ridiculous hate to info@thehatenapkin.com

Arik is all out of hate. Arik plans to lean on Carol and Paulie, who provide real estate management companies and house flippers.

Carol starts with a hate letter to a doctor's office that doesn't respect their patients' time. The clinic tries to charge the patient for one missed visit. Paybacks are an itch in this punny episode of The Hate Napkin.

Arik thinks people should incorporate themselves, and Carol considers incorporating her vagina since the government doesn't know how to regulate businesses. Paulie tells a similar story of how to handle an unwarranted bill. Folks, if you are in court, don't accidentally discuss your court strategy next to the plaintiff.

Arik studied archeology and is tired of people referring to dinosaur stories. Arik dug hard for that one, but it will land in a few hundred years when they find a USB of this podcast under some bones near an abandoned truck stop in the year 2057.

Carol goes off on trendy house flippers. They put lipstick on a pig and then call a contractor back about work the previous seller wouldn't let them do in the first place.

Arik wraps it all up with people who identify themselves with one niche thing, "Hey, my name is Bill, and I have six toes. Did you know the incidence of polydactyly is 2.3 per 1000 in white males, 13.5 per 1000 in black males, and 0.6 per 1000 in white females and 11.1 per 1000 in black females?"

"That's great, Bill. Now, why do you want to replace Carla's position at the Burt Korn Dairy Queen?"

Send things you hate to info@thehatenapkin.com