In this episode of the Self Driven Child podcast, I'm thrilled to welcome back one of my favorite voices in parenting, Jess Lahey. Jess is a New York Times bestselling author, an educator, and someone who's been on the front lines of both teaching and parenting. We discuss the emotional rollercoaster that is the transition from high school to college—not just for our kids, but for us as parents too.

We talk about the balance between supporting our children and giving them the space to grow into their own people. Jess shares personal anecdotes about her own children's experiences, shedding light on the challenges and triumphs that come with this major life change. Jess gives insights on how to approach the first day of college, handle the inevitable bumps along the way, and most importantly, how to step back and let our kids take the reins.

Episode Highlights:

[00:42] - Introduction to the episode and guest Jess Lahey.

[3:25] - Jess shares her experience with her children's transition to college.

[7:09] - The importance of letting kids create their own identity in college.

[14:24] - How to support your child without taking over, and the power of apology.

[22:19] - Preparing kids for the unexpected challenges in college.

[26:19] - The importance of helping kids build competence and a sense of control.

[39:17] - Understanding why kids push away during major transitions and how to handle it.

Links & Resources:

https://www.cnn.com/2024/08/16/health/college-student-independence-wellness/index.html

https://www.jessicalahey.com/comingofageinthemiddle/2015/6/21/season-of-the-malcontents

If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference.

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com

In this episode, I sit down with my co-author, Dr. William R. Stixrud, to do an origin story into the key concepts from our latest book, "What Do You Say?: How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home". We discuss the crucial importance of connection between parents and children, exploring how empathy and validation can transform relationships and foster mental well-being. Bill shares insights from our research and experiences, highlighting the profound impact of close relationships on kids' stress levels and overall happiness. Tune in as we unpack practical strategies for effective communication and building stronger bonds with your children.

Episode Highlights:

[01:37] - Bill discusses the motivation behind writing our second book, "What Do You Say?".
[03:13] - The challenges of balancing control and fostering independence in children.
[06:57] - The unexpected mental health risks in high-achieving children.
[08:19] - The power of empathy and validation in strengthening parent-child connections.
[10:25] - How reflective listening can enhance communication and trust.
[12:25] - The importance of understanding before judging in parent-child interactions.
[18:27] - Real-life stories illustrating the impact of empathetic responses.

Links & Resources:

• Get the book: What Do You Say?: How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home by Dr. William R. Stixrud and Ned Johnson
• Website: Get the Top 10 Tips from Our Books: https://www.theselfdrivenchild.com
• Submit questions: Bill@theselfdrivenchild.com or Ned@theselfdrivenchild.com
• High Schoolers College Prep: https://prepmatters.com/ or call (301) 951-0350

If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference.

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com

Today we are talking about the roots of "The Self Driven Child" with my co-author, Dr. William R. Stixrud. Discover how our understanding of autonomy and control transformed our approach to parenting and education. We explore the neuroscience behind stress and motivation, sharing our journey from initial insights to the profound impact our work has had globally. Join us as we recount our Marvel origin story and reveal the science and anecdotes that shaped our bestselling books.

Dr. William Stixrud, a clinical neuropsychologist, joins me, Ned Johnson, as we discuss the key principles of our collaboration. From handling stress to fostering intrinsic motivation, this episode covers it all. Whether you're a long-time listener or new to our podcast, this episode offers valuable insights into creating a supportive environment for children and young adults.

Episode Highlights:

[0:34] - Welcoming Dr. William Stixrud and introducing the topic of autonomy and control.

[1:34] - The global impact of "The Self Driven Child" and the importance of a sense of control.

[2:12] - Discussing stress and its effects on the brain from Dr. Stixrud's early research.

[5:39] - How stress and control relate to motivation and mental health.

[6:28] - Personal anecdotes and professional experiences on stress and motivation.

[8:45] - The concept of autonomy in parenting and education.

[13:17] - The bi-directional relationship between stress and brain function.

[17:07] - Practical advice on supporting autonomy in children.

[20:24] - The impact of test preparation on stress and performance.

[25:38] - Addressing the physiological aspects of stress and anxiety.

[30:02] - Reflections on the journey of writing "The Self Driven Child".

[31:03] - Concluding thoughts and a sneak peek into the next episode.

If this episode has helped you, remember to rate, follow, and share the Self-Driven Child Podcast. Your support helps us reach more people and create more content that makes a difference.

If you have a high school aged student and would like to talk about putting a tutoring or college plan together, reach out to Ned's company, PrepMatters at www.prepmatters.com