Showing results by publisher "HarperAudio" in Humor

Who is Septimus Heap? A lost child? An ordinary hero? A powerful wizard? The Magyk begins here. The first book in this enthralling new series by Angie Sage leads listeners on a fantastic journey filled with quirky characters and magykal charms, potions, and spells. Magyk is an original story of lost and rediscovered identities, rich with humor and heart.

Everyone who wishes upon a star, or a candle, or a penny thrown into a fountain knows that you're not allowed to tell anyone what you've wished for. But even so, there is someone out there who hears it. In a magical land called the Haven lives a young fairy named Ophelia Delphinium Fidgets. Ophelia is no ordinary fairy - she is a Granter: one of the select fairies whose job it is to venture out into the world and grant the wishes of unsuspecting humans every day.

Life is weird! The weirdest Valentine's Day story in the history of the world!

It's a big day in the big city for Stick Cat and his best friend, Edith. There are treasures to hunt, songs to sing, pigeons to catch, and naps to take. But way up on the 23rd floor, danger lurks just around the corner. Terrible noises and violent crashes trap a desperate man in the building across the alley. Stick Cat will need to navigate his way across the alley - and around Edith's peculiar ways - to attempt a rescue.

Big sister Beezus Quimby tries to be patient with her four-year-old little sister, Ramona, but it isn't easy, not when Ramona powders her nose with marshmallows and invites her nursery school class to a party without telling her family. Sometimes Beezus doesn't like Ramona, but the girls are sisters and that means they will always love each other - just not every single minute.

Molly Moon is back, and this time she's hypnotizing her way to the Academy Awards in Los Angeles. Along with Rocky and Petula the pug, Molly is tracking the sinister activities of American billionaire Primo Cell, who wants to become president and take over the world. He has all the Hollywood celebrities in his power, but Molly Moon has an amazing power of her own, which even she doesn't know about.

Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire are intelligent children. They are charming, and resourceful, and have pleasant facial features. Unfortunately, they are exceptionally unlucky. In the first two books alone, the three youngsters encounter a greedy and repulsive villain, itchy clothing, a disastrous fire, a plot to steal their fortune, a lumpy bed, a deadly serpent, a large brass reading lamp, a long knife, and a terrible odor.

When the Problim children's ramshackle bungalow in the Swampy Woods goes kaboom, the seven siblings - each born on a different day of the week - have to move into their grandpa's bizarre old mansion in Lost Cove. No problem! For the Problim children, every problem is a gift! But rumors about their family run rampant in the small town: tales of a bitter feud, a hidden treasure, and a certain kind of magic lingering in the halls of #7 Main Street.

When the Cool Bean picks the name of the coolest of the cool beans, Beanadette, out of a hat for the annual gift exchange, he’s not feeling very merry or festive—he’s feeling pressure! Beanadette is definitely expecting the coolest present of all. Will the Cool Bean find the perfect gift in time for the party?

When Paddington returns from his trip to Peru, he doesn't waste any time getting back to business. The stock exchange, the ballet, the barber's shop, Mr. Curry's kitchen - nothing is safe when Paddington gets to work.

Nate knows he's meant for big things. REALLY big things. But things don't always go your way just because you're awesome. Nate barely survives his dad's toxic oatmeal before rushing off to school - minus his lunch. He body slams the no-nonsense principal. He accidentally insults his least favorite teacher, the horrifying Mrs. Godfrey (aka Godzilla). And school has barely started!

Pete the Cat and his friends are busy as can be baking cupcakes for a party, and Pete can’t wait to perform with his groovy band. But some of the cupcakes have gone missing! Who could have taken them?

Ramona's job is to be nice to fussy Mrs. Kemp, who watches her while her mother works. If Mrs. Quimby didn't work, Mr. Quimby couldn't return to college. On top of all that, third grade isn't turning out as Ramona expected, even though she enjoys her class's new reading program, D.E.A.R. Danny the Yard Ape teases her, and, on one horrible day, she throws up - at school. Being eight isn't easy, but it's never dull!

Oh no! Pete the Kitty has a tummy ache. Good thing his dad knows just what to do. It’s time to go to the doctor! Except Pete may be a teensy-weensy bit nervous about his first visit to the doctor. With the help of his dad, Pete discovers the doctor isn’t scary. Beginning listeners will easily relate to Pete the Kitty as he overcomes his fear of going to the doctor's office.

Big Nate is going for broke! Mighty Jefferson Middle School always wins. Then Nate decides it's time to go from zeroes to heroes! Will Nate crack under the pressure of the "Ultimate Snowdown"? Or lead P.S. 38 to its biggest victory ever?

On February 29th, at 4:23 p.m., everyone in the Bailey family over the age of twelve gets a superpower. No one knows why, and no one questions it. All the Baileys know is that it's their duty to protect the world from those evil, supervillainous Johnsons. Today, Rafter Bailey and his brother Benny are finally going to get their superpowers. Benny wants to be a speedy, and Rafter hopes he gets his grandpa's super strength so he can save the day just like him. But when their powers arrive, they are - well - duds.

Paddington Bear had traveled all the way from Darkest Peru when the Brown family first met him on Paddington Station. Since then their lives have never been quite the same... for ordinary things become quite extraordinary when a bear called Paddington is involved.

In the absurd land of Nth, Thisby Thestoop can be found within the forlorn walls of Castle Grimstone, down the precarious steps of the Black Mountain dungeon, up to her nose in griffon toenails, gnoll spittle, and troll meat (to give to them, not made of them). When the prince and princess arrive for a Royal Inspection, the much too good-looking Princess Iphigenia winds up lost in the tunnels of the dungeon - without her guards, her staff, or her younger twin brother - and it's up to Thisby to guide the princess safely.

Since returning from London, the three Incorrigible children and their plucky governess, Miss Penelope Lumley, have been exceedingly busy. Despite their wolfish upbringing, the children have taken up bird-watching, with no unfortunate consequences - yet. And a perplexing gift raises hard questions about how Penelope came to be left at the Swanburne Academy for Poor Bright Females and why her parents never bothered to return for her. But hers is not the only family mystery to solve....

Meet Nancy, who believes that more is always better when it comes to fancy. Now enjoy Fancy Nancy like you never have before with this splendiferous audio collection filled with 31 stories