Episodios

  • 445: How to help your withdrawing partner be vulnerable

    445: How to help your withdrawing partner be vulnerable
    Jun 21 2024
    Foreplay listeners, join us today in a 'School of Love' lesson all about the withdrawer's world! Withdrawers are often shutting down, walking away or seeming closed off in the cycle. These moves help them get safe and regulated but are a step in the negative cycle because the pursuing partner is left alone. When we can slow down, and be patient we can help to reveal the vulnerable underbelly of the emotional and sexual withdrawer. In two amazing role plays, hosts Laurie and George display exactly how to get slow, and get curious to learn about the ouch underneath the protective move. Vulnerability is the solution to the negative cycle and so much healing lies in these conversations. Withdrawing partners may often feel like they are messing up, a failure or that something is wrong with them. Pursuing partners may try to help by jumping in to reassure but this would be like diving into the shallow end of a pool. Staying in the deep but being there together is where the change happens. Let us know what notes you take from today's show and as always keep it hot y'all! Please help the podcast by using our great sponsors! ForiaWellness.com/foreplay -- products to help you get and stay aroused! RocketMoney.com -- gain some money back in your budget by having Rocket Money find and cancel your unused subscriptions! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    37 m
  • 444: Three Steps to Get Outta the Cycle

    444: Three Steps to Get Outta the Cycle
    Jun 14 2024
    When we’re in distress as a couple, it’s hard to see that our partners protective moves - either criticism or withdrawal - are really ways that they are covering their deeper hurt, pain and vulnerability. But in order not to be lost to each other, first, we need to recognize that we are in a cycle where our partner triggers us and we trigger our partner… over and over. Secondly, we have to allow enough space for our partner to express themselves without expressing our pain at the same time. We have to let them go first. Third, we have to get curious about the deeper meaning of their protective moves. Do they go away because they feel like they’ll never measure up? Do they harp on relational issues because ironically, they want us to have a better relationship? Join George and Laurie today as they work through not just one, but two role plays in both the emotional and s*xual cycle and share with listeners what lies below the surface. To be successful here, listeners are reminded to have an understanding of the moves of their negative cycle and how each partner contributes. This way we can slow down, practice patience and have empathy for one another's vulnerabilities. Learning this process helps lovers meet one another in places where they previously left each other. Interested in working with an EFT couples therapist? Visit www.iceeft.com and head over to our IG @foreplay_sextherapypodcast. Let us know what you want to hear from us next. Keep it hot y'all! Check out our great sponsors! RocketMoney.com -- Stop those unused subscriptions from renewing! Rocket Money does the work for you! Uberlube.com -- Laurie's 20+ year favorite lubricant! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    36 m
  • 443: The Art of Pillow Talk

    443: The Art of Pillow Talk
    Jun 7 2024
    Today we're talking between the sheets or rather how to break the silence between the sheets. We always say that if you can talk about sex then you can have great sex. But what happens when you don't know what to talk about? Join our hosts today as they bring up how to start a sexy conversation and what to share with your intimate partner. Conversation might start with ideas about romance, foreplay, turn ons and lead to fantasies and more! The art of having these chats enhances your intimate world and deepens the bond that couples share. If you find yourself stuck in a sex rut, this episode can help you break out of the mundane and explore a more playful, fun side of sex with your honey. Keep it hot y'all! Check out our fantastic sponsors (and help support Foreplay!): Foriawellness.com/foreplay -- great massage oils to enhance your erotic times! The code 'foreplay' gets you 20% off your first order! Addyi.com -- an FDA-approved drug for certain premenopausal women with low libido! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    36 m
  • 442: The Ouch

    442: The Ouch
    May 31 2024
    In last week's episode we discussed the purpose of the protected moves. On today's show we are going deeper to the "ouch," the pain, the vulnerability that lies below that protection. George and Laurie invite listeners today to explore the pain that we can all feel when we experience rejection, shame or worthlessness in an interaction with our partner. They acknowledge that this is a HEAVY topic but an important one if we want to understand our moves in the cycle, ourselves and our partners on a deeper level. You may want to avoid these conversations but this is where we need conversation the most. Grab your pencil and take notes during the school of love lesson. Believe it or not, understanding the ouch can lead to a bigger, better O! Please consider partnering with us by using our sponsors: RocketMoney.com/foreplay -- Get rid of those automatically renewing subscriptions that you don't use that are money down the drain! Uberlube.com -- Lauries favoritest lubricant! Be sure to use the code foreplay at checkout to get your 10% discount! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    36 m
  • 441: The Purpose Under the Protection

    441: The Purpose Under the Protection
    May 23 2024
    Do you ever wonder why you get angry in a fight? Have you been unsure why conflict makes you want to run? Join George and Laurie in today's episode to learn the purpose of your protective move, the healthy function it is trying to achieve and the impact it has on you and your partner. These moves, often seen as fight or flight are there to keep us safe and in some way to protect the relationship. However, this is where a negative cycle forms as each partner's protective move triggers a move in their partner and round and round we go. If you have been caught in this cycle you know just how exhausting it can be and probably have thought if we could just talk about it now, or if we could just take some space it would be SO MUCH BETTER! Learn with us today in this episode all about protective moves and how you can slow down and begin developing new moves, ones that can keep you connected with your partner. Get connected and keep it hot y'all! Check out our great sponsor: Foriawellness.com/foreplay -- check out their sex-enhancing oils! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    34 m
  • 440: All Things Cycle

    440: All Things Cycle
    May 18 2024
    Join our hosts on this episode as they go over all things cycle! The emotional and sexual cycle is a tool that EFT therapists use to help clients find a way out of their current distress and better organize, express and connect. At the core of both of these cycles is distress that our brains code as a threat. Did you know that your brain reacts in a split second to assess threat, real or perceived? This healthy survival skill only gives us a few moves that you might recognize as fight or flight. In today's show, George and Laurie provide listeners with an overview of these cycles, the moves or roles that partners can act out and the intentions under each move. We're reminded that intention is different from impact and to have better, more secure relationships we need to see how we impact our partners. We hope you gain something from this school of love episode and see if you can apply it to your own relationship. Try asking yourself what happens to me in this cycle, what move do I make? Laurie drops this amazing gem, "Curiosity is the antidote to anxiety." Head on over to our instagrama @foreplay_sextherapypodcast and let us know your thoughts in the comments! Check out our great sponsors: Uberlube.com -- Laurie's favorite lubricant! Get 10% off by using the code 'Foreplay'. FactorMeals.com/Foreplay50 -- Great, ready to eat meals. Use the code Foreplay50 to get 50% off your first order and 20% off your next! Manscaped.com -- Great personal grooming help! Use the code 'Foreplay' for 20% off! And free shipping! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    37 m
  • 439: Is Secure Sex Hot?

    439: Is Secure Sex Hot?
    May 10 2024
    Secure sex too often gets lumped in with BORING sex! Laurie and George are challenging this myth and shouting from the rooftops that secure sex is HOT! Join us today as our hosts review what secure sex looks like and how secure sexual attachment helps couples transcend the ordinary into the extraordinary. If you're reading this feeling despondent about the state of your relationship, have some hope and listen to our experts on how to create more secure sexual attachment. Repairing, owning your stuff, showing appreciation are just some examples of action that you can start taking today to create more security and have better, hotter sex! Don't miss out on this episode and fall asleep at the wheel believing secure=boring. Learn how great great lovers treat each other and what they do every day to ensure that their sex life is hot, hot, hot through the years. Check out our sponsors: Foriawellness.com/foreplay -- Try their sex oils designed to increase your sensual experience! Get 20% off your first order! Rocketmoney.com/foreplay -- Save money by getting rid of those subscriptions that you don't use that continue to auto renew! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    37 m
  • 438: A Tribute to Dr. Sue Johnson

    438: A Tribute to Dr. Sue Johnson
    May 3 2024
    This episode is dedicated to Dr. Sue Johnson, the founder of EFT and a beloved mentor, teacher and friend. We remember her legacy and devotion to helping couples love better. George and Laurie have been heavily influenced by Sue's contributions to the field of couple therapy, moving treatment from a predominant focus on behavioral change to creating healthy attachments and secure, loving bonds. Join us today, to connect over this profound loss and to hear the stories and memories we have with Dr. Sue Johnson. You won't want to miss out on what she thought about George's driving skills! Thank you Sue for your incredible work in this field and for the influence, information, education and love you shared. You will be missed greatly! EFT Therapists! Laurie is coming to Chicago this month! Come join her! Please visit our great sponsors: Addyi.com -- an FDA-approved drug for certain per-menapausal women with low libido. Uberlube.com -- Laurie's favorite lubricant for the past 25 years! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    31 m