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This is the 3rd and final part of my series on red flags in relationships.

This final part is about how to make sure we don’t ignore or deny red flags in relationships and how to navigate them.

Specific points include:

- Video Overview

- Nina Simone Quote (a deeper look)

- 1. What is your definition of love and what are loving behaviors/qualities?

- What constitutes as love for us?

- 2. Listen carefully both to what's said and what's not said

- Pay attention to your body's messages

- Specific things to listen for

- 3. Self-reflection and your own past

- 4. Keep attention on all aspects of your life: “Plant your own garden”

- "All the flowers of tomorrow are in the seeds of today", Indian Proverb'

- 5. Take yourself seriously

- "Emotions are not a luxury, they are a complex aid in the fight for existence", Antonnio R Damasio'

- 5. Change and Communication

- 'Say it even if your voice shakes'

- 7. Thoughts on the advice “Date a year before you make any significant changes”

- 8. Talking to others we trust

- 9. Change is possible in relationship

- 10. Sometimes you just have to leave

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This is the second of three episodes about red flags in relationships. This one focuses on why we might at first not see red flags (when you look at people through ‘rose coloured’ glasses, sometimes red flags just look like flags) and also why, if we do eventually see them, we might stay and endure or deny them.

Areas include:

- Early Experience in Life (someone’s childhood)

- The Effect of Love

- Love in Imagination

- Fear in Imagination

- Rewards & Drive

- Shame

- What to expect for Part 3

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If there’s anything else you’d like to know about John-Paul and how he might be able to help you, please do contact him via his website www.thistrustedplace.co.uk

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This is Part 1 of 3 about red flags in relationships. In this first part, I suggest 10 different potential red flags to look out for in relationships.

Each flag as follows:

1: Dominance of Anger

2: Unable to take Responsibility

3: Disconnected Relationship with Emotional Experience

4: One Extreme to another

5: Their ‘Love’ Doesn’t Run That Deep

6: Lying

7: Impulsivity

8: Not Paying Attention to You

9: Dominated by Competition

10: Internal Red Flags

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If there’s anything else you’d like to know about John-Paul and how he might be able to help you, please do contact him via his website www.thistrustedplace.co.uk

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This is the latest in a series of conversations, in this case with experienced therapist Susan McGrath who works particularly with the transpersonal/spiritual aspects and addictions and dependencies (mentioning the 12 Step Programme).

In this really interesting conversation we talk about a whole range of subjects including Susan’s ‘bugbears’ about the profession and her own ambivalence about it at times, but also what a great honour it is to be someone’s therapist.

Particular timestamps include:

2:02 - Susan’s turning point in life (journey becoming a therapist)

4:28 - Training to be a therapist 28 years ago

6:12 - Susan’s experience with therapy training

9:56 - Susan’s current practice, an overview

13:00 - Navigating the idea of ‘God’ and ‘Spirituality’ in therapy

17:19 - Comments around addiction (drinking, drugs, etc)

20:29 - Susan’s one ‘criticism’ about therapy

27:03 - Motivation for becoming a therapist

29:06 - If Susan stopped being a therapist tomorrow...

30:10 - What Susan & John Paul think of being therapists (how they like it)

35:13 - Working with ‘types’ of people

36:53 - Therapy “isn’t for everyone”

38:40 - Tips for someone coming into the profession (a discussion about pay levels in therapy)

46:55 - Susan’s future plans

48:19 - Final words, how to get in touch with Susan

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This is a continuation of my previous video about potential earnings, specifically focussing on how to build a private practice and find clients in response to a subscriber's question.

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I often get asked about earning potential as a therapist, so I thought it might be helpful to give an example of an income and then show a calculation on how to achieve it, along with some thoughts.

The BACP article on portfolio careers can be found here: https://www.bacp.co.uk/bacp-journals/therapy-today/2024/march-2024/the-big-issue/

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In this video I read out David’s story, someone who kindly wrote to me having seen the channel to tell the thoughtful, honest and inspiring story of his bisexuality and the effect it has had on his life.

Following the story, I make some reflections on it, including the importance of self-acceptance/love and also the acceptance and love of others in David’s journey.

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In this conversation we cover lots of issues relating to narcissism, including:

- what narcissism is,

- the effects of being narcissistic,

- what to do if you’re in relationship with a narcissist, and

- some ideas if you have narcissistic traits turned up high yourself

Support the Show.

If there’s anything else you’d like to know about John-Paul and how he might be able to help you, please do contact him via his website www.thistrustedplace.co.uk