Chores are a fantastic way to teach our kids responsibility, work ethic, and build a helpful spirit. On today's episode Morgan is talking about why chores are important and how you can practically add chores to your household at any age and stage.

"Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old he will not depart from it."

Proverbs 22:6

This time-honored Proverb of course applies to our children's spiritual journey, but I believe it also applies to so many other things, reminding us parents of how what we teach our kids now will be what they carry with them for a lifetime.

WHY CHORES?

What chores can teach your kids:

• responsibility
• work ethic
• empowerment
• independence
• autonomy
• a servant's/helpful spirit

2 QUESTIONS THAT HAVE CHANGED EVERYTHING!

"See a need; fill a need."

"If not now, when? If not you, who?"

Harvard study on the importance of chores

AGE APPROPRIATE CHORES:

PRE-SCHOOL (AGES 2-4)

• pick up toys, put in bins
• put away books
• help put away silverware from the dishwasher (if plastic of course)

SCHOOL-AGE (AGES 5-8)

• make bed
• put away clothes
• set or clear dinner table
• sweep

TWEEN (AGES 9-12)

• start training them on how to do their own laundry
• clean room
• bathroom (toilets included)
• mow the lawn
• pull weeds

TEEN (AGES 13+)

• same as all the ages above
• vacuum/mop
• meal prep
• THE GOAL OF THIS AGE GROUP IS TO TEACH LIFE SKILLS AND TIME MANAGEMENT.

DO YOU PAY?

This truly you can do how you like and what works best for you and your family. Also, don't be afraid to pivot if one payment way isn't working.

• PRE-SCHOOL AGE - visual chore charts, sticker charts and treasure boxes are great at these little ages.

some ideas:

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• SCHOOL AGE - we have a chore chart and pay a quarter a chore, but again, you can do something different, this is just an idea.
• TWEEN - at this age an allowance may be a good way to do your pay system. Encourage saving and giving.
• TEEN - I love the idea of paying your teen like you would at a job. Once a week and no loans. This is the age to encourage and instill good money management.

Disclaimer: again, you can make this totally your own and create different systems that work for your household. The ultimate goal here is to raise up responsible, hard-working, independent adults!

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Nothing worthwhile is ever easy and our presence in our children's lives has the ability to impact not just them, but also generations to come. Lean in, I hope you feel encouraged and maybe a little challenged by today's episode.

YOUR PRESENCE IN YOUR HOME MATTERS.

Start with knowing who you are: where do you find your identity?

"Your job is just what you do, not who you are."

Sage Journal : Positive Involved Dads

3 Practical ways to be more present

1. Remove Distractions

2. Set Aside the To-Do List

3. Create Intentional and Consistent Family Time

You have created this beautiful family, now go enjoy each other. Enter into your kids' worlds, get to know who they are and their friends. Have fun together!

You have an amazing opportunity and privilege to impact your kids for a lifetime and when you take the time to live fully present in your life, you will find so much more JOY in it!

I apologize in advance for the weird audio in the middle and end of this episode. I recorded in a different room and the air conditioning was horribly loud in the background and then there was a crazy bird chirping that I couldn't edit out. So hopefully it isn't too distracting and you can hang in there until the end. Love you friends! Thanks for your patience as I keep learning how to do this better and better.

If you are in a season of loneliness, this one is for you. As moms, we are struggling with this. The research shows it.

Harvard study: "36% of all Americans feel lonely 'frequently' or 'almost all of the time'".

Heath Day poll from 2024: about 1 in 3 U.S. adults feel lonely "at least once a week."

"It is not good for man to be alone"

Genesis 2:18

5 scripture verses to help you if you are lonely:

1. Joshua 1:9
2. Psalm 23:4
3. Psalm 73:23
4. Lamentations 3:22-24
5. 1 Peter 5:7

Take Away: Instead of looking inward or outward to deal with our loneliness, let's choose to look upward.

God trades our anxieties, fears, doubts, etc. for His perfect peace and JOY!

REST FOR THE WEARY MAMA is coming soon!!! I would love if you wanted to join the launch team, helping get the word out about the book and getting early access to the book before it goes live on Amazon and other retailers. I would be so honored!

FILL OUT THIS FORM IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE A PART OF THE LAUNCH TEAM.

Loneliness is considered an epidemic right now with nearly 1 in 4 adults feeling lonely. In today's episode we are talking about some of the things contributing to our loneliness and some practical ways we can combat it.

READ THE SURVEY HERE

Common Causes of Loneliness:

1. Technology

2. Too Busy

3. Isolating Ourselves

4. Social Media - stop scrolling!!

9 Practical Ways to Combat Loneliness

1. Don't ignore it
2. Make time for relationships/connection
3. Limit social media use
4. Prioritize self-care
5. Reach out to friends & family
6. Schedule regular social activities
7. Volunteer or get involved; in the community, your church, or school
8. Practice gratitude
9. Seek or consider therapy or counseling

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

- Psalm 34:18

We are all in this together! If you are feeling lonely today friend, take a minute to even just reach out here. I would love to send you a little extra encouragement.

Parenting is a wild ride. Let's peel back the onion of our parenting expectations, why we have them, and learn how to parent beyond them. From little years to teenagers and beyond, when we learn to parent beyond our expectations, we will find more joy in whatever season of parenting we find ourselves in.

1. The Root of our Expectations Why do we have certain parenting expectations? It comes back to the age-old nature vs. nurture. It's both! Our upbringing and other outside influences, along with our innate personality, drive our parenting expectations.

Looking for help discovering what are typical behaviors and expectations depending on your kid(s) ages/stages? The Raising Boys and Girls Podcast with David Thomas and Sissy Goff. This is one of my favorite parenting podcasts and their books are amazing resources for raising good, well-rounded, emotionally strong, and resilient kids. A few faves:

Raising Emotionally Strong Boys by David Thomas

Raising Worry-Free Girls by Sissy Goff

When can you know if your expectations are taking you to an unhealthy place? Are you bitter? Resentful? Frustrated the majority of the time? If so, it may be time to reality check and heart check your current expectations. Expectations are good as long as they are realistic to your season of parenting and the age/stage of your kids.

"Where there are no oxen, the manger is empty."

Proverbs 14:4 (NIV)

"Where there are no oxen, the manger is clean."

Proverbs 14:4 (ESV)

As long as you have people living in your home, there is going to be evidence of their existence. And that is OKAY!

Every season of parenting presents new challenges. Yet, each one helps build us and shape us into the character of Jesus and develop all of the Fruits of the Spirit:

• love. joy. peace. patience. kindness. goodness. faithfulness. gentleness. self-control. (Galatians 5:22-23)

2. Situational Expectations

When expectations are too low, we end up dreading whatever it is that is coming. If they are too high, we end up disappointed. It is all about finding the balance and the middle ground here.

KNOW YOUR KID(S). BE A STUDENT OF YOUR KID(S).

• don't expect your kid(s) to be you.
• don't live vicariously through your kid(s)

You absolutely can still have standards and expectations for your kids (especially when it comes to behavior). Still, I challenge you and me to keep learning and observing who our kiddos are, who God made them to uniquely be) and parent from that place.

Let's make this practical. Here are 7 ways to Parent Beyond Expectations:

1. Talk about them
2. Set reasonable and realistic expectations (don't get mad at them in the process of learning)
3. Be a student of your kid(s)
4. Allow everything to be a teachable moment
5. Build in time for fun!
6. Don't be afraid of messes
7. Be patient in the process

Remember, mama, you have a hard job. Be patient with your kids, but also with yourself. You are also growing and learning right alongside them. You are doing a great job!

NEW HERE? Yay! Thanks for listening.

I want to encourage you to head over to my website, www.morganaellis.com, and subscribe. I send out monthly newsletters with more bits of encouragement and it is how you can be first to know all the things.

Also, come say "hello" over on Instagram @mrsmorganellis

I hang out mostly over there and love to connect to other mamas looking to follow Jesus more closely and find more joy in their season.

We are better together friend and I am cheering you on!

We are all feeling it a little bit, but let's first agree first and foremost to be nice to one another! Because you are doing a hard job raising those kids.

"mom guilt" is the idea that we aren't quite measuring up (whether that is to your own standard or someone else's) causing feelings of inadequacy.

So what is fueling your mom guilt? Comparison? Trying to do it all? Mama, one lie we have been fed, at least I have is that I can do it all and have it all. Nothing is further from the truth.

Check out the book: "Lies Women Believe" a great read covering many of the lies we have been told as women and how we can overcome them with truth.

One such discussed is, "My circumstances do not make me what I am; they merely reveal what I am." Yikes! this one stings a bit, but this is where I find a little bit of "guilt" is a good thing. To remind ourselves to do a heart check of our priorities.

"For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

Matthew 6:21

What am I treasuring? What are you treasuring? And is that what is fueling your guilt?

1. Give yourself grace

a. Raising kids is a hard job! And you are doing it!

2. Speak truth over the lies

a. use scripture

b. feeling judgment from others?

"No weapon forged against you will prevail, and you will refute every tongue that accuses you. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and this is their vindications from me," declares the LORD.

Isaiah 54:17

c. feeling self-doubt or shame?

The thief comes only to stead and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.

John 10:10

3. Find your people!

a. Surround yourself with other women and moms who build you up, speak life, and encourage you.

JUST REMEMBER: YOU ARE AN AMAZING MOM AND YOU ARE DOING A GREAT JOB!